- Congratulations on the new baby!
Yes it’ll be hard on you but hes doing is wrong! Sounds like he need grow up and help take care if his family. If his name on the birth certificate go after him for child support. Never take him back because he’s doing this now wait till there is real problem he’ll just walk out again. For his other child does the mom have rights to see child? I know you said youve been there from beginning maybe try to set up dates so both siblings can see each other and grow up together. There’s also PPD which men can have wouldnt hurt to have him seek help if he does have it my hubby did helped when he got help to talk to someone and meds. Even couple therapy too. Im giving more than one advice since idk whole story on both sides.
Let him go, he isn’t any good.
I wouldn’t wish anyone to go to hell ,it’s way to hot and hurtful .lol
Just focus on baby u can’t force someone to stay. And sometimes letting them go is what will bring them back
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Ask him if someone in his family can loan him a pair while he’s down there. In all seriousness, let him go. I understand that relationships fall out, but to say it via phone and right before the holidays is a bitch move. In the long run, you’ll be happy. Sit down and figure out what he should be paying you and tell him you need that asap. If not, go to the courts and have him put on child support. Hopefully he doesn’t take away your oldest daughter because that wouldn’t be fair to your family.
Let him go if he wants to go. It’ll be his lose at the end of the day. He sounds like an asshole so you’re probably better off even if it doesn’t feel that way. Focus on yourself and your baby and doing what’s best for you guys. He is showing you his true colors. Anyone who can just walk away from their child isn’t someone you need. He will likely be back, so take this time to get your ducks in order, take care of your baby and show him and yourself that you don’t need him. If he sends you any nasty messages, keep them, keep everything in care he decides to show up later and cause some bullshit.
Start preparing like he’s already gone
Let him go for now and act like he isn’t there
Best to start making life decisions as a single mom. He will either never come back or he will miss you and want to come back that’s up to you if that time comes… Don’t wait around for him because you will never get ahead.
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I just had a baby in December after seeing her father long distance for almost 5 years I found out right before I gave birth he had a whole other family. About two months later I co fronted him about it. I also found out that they just had a baby a month after I did. Sometimes even when you have no other choice but to walk away it’s the best decision you will ever make. I thought I’d be a single mom and be alone and that I just wasn’t worthy. I hope you don’t feel that way. I met someone who is so much better in all aspects. Im glad that everything happened the way it did. So just focus on you and your baby!! Better things will come your way… If he does come back don’t hold the door open for him, let him prove to you that he really wants to be there.
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Big red flag! Believe him. He’s showing you who he is.
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Move on sweetheart. You are already living separate so he has his stuff with him I assume. If you have anything of his box it up. He does not love you, this was an excuse to get away I think. Doubt it was just since baby was born. You and your baby don’t need this at all. Make sure you file for support. Hopefully you know where he went? I hope you and baby are living somewhere comfortable.
Kick his ass to the curb, he’s a selfish. Let him go, U don’t need him
Make sure u get the address where hes from
And get info on his job…so u can serve him with child support papers
Housing issues?
He’s wrong on all counts…
I would absolutely tell him to stay where he went and to leave me alone, then I’d go file child support
Leave him the hell alone and make damn sure you and your baby have the finances needed to support yourselves. I’m so sorry about his daughter who is basically yours too. How absolutely heartbreaking for both you and her.
Get help and make sure he pays child support. I wouldn’t let him come back even if he wanted too.I hope you have family and friends you can count on some.If you haven’t get to social services for help ASAP, because this is a short week
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Take care of you and your baby! That baby needs you and you need that baby. That baby doesn’t deserve him and he doesn’t deserve neither one of you. Take him to court for child support…even if he doesn’t want to see the baby. That’s the least he can do.
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First I want to say sorry I know this has to be so hurtful I would keep the communication going as far as the baby congratulations to you remember this one thing you are worth it:two_hearts:
stay strong no matter what you got this I wish you the very best he may feel scared 
see how it goes
Take care of yourself and your little one. Time heals broken hearts.
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You and your baby come first he will regret his mistakes some day. Please be happy and enjoy your baby
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You prepare for the worst and hope for the best. You do not need a man to have a happy home, YOU WILL BE OK.
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What man says since the baby is born , you all have grown apart ? Sounds to me is he is scared to be another daddy and deal with a newborn baby .
I would let him go !! Move on with you and baby . You or the baby don’t need that stress .
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How selfish of him to abandon you and his child; and to take the 3 year old from the only Mom she has ever known. She must be so confused.
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Bye felicia don’t invest your time a maybe you do you now. That will be enough until you find a keeper.
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I’m thinking you should maybe be thankful for dodging a selfish, irresponsible, bullet. 💁
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Postpartum is real. He just trying to take the easy way out of having to deal with a newborn. If he leaves you make sure his ass stay gone and don’t take him back to nowhere but child support court
Focus on your baby and yourself. If he’s undecided on if he’s coming back then there’s nothing between you two but the baby so it’s best to end it now and focus on you and the baby. Sorry.
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If he doesn’t want to come back, fine. You sound like you have a good head on your shoulders and will be fine without him.
Your heart wants him back but your head says no. Listen to your head. It will take time but you got this. Prayers for all.
Sorry, take care of the little one, he wants to go, or he’d never would have said that, move on without him, I would
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Let him go. And make sure you get child support
Here’s what i know… If a person wants to leave they’re gonna leave. Not a thing you can do. BUT, he does have fiancial responsibility to that baby he helped create so get him for child support bc it’s not your sole responsibility to financially support the child alone. If you have close family/friends it’s time to call on them for help. Wrap yourself up in support.
well I am Sorry for your situation… i would suggest to talk to yourdr. as u have hust had a baby and Post pardom is real snd u and the baby are #1, take care if u as u go thru this situation as a new mother… u can change how he feels, but u can control hiw u deal with it…also speak to a lawyer concerning is visitation, if u are nursing he should have to come to u for that till at least 18 months old, and i know money shouldnt be but u have to take care of u and baby…
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Wait it out. Keep communication open. You are both in a major life transition. Your response to him was priceless.
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You can’t force someone to love you. You aren’t the first in this situation with him obviously because he already had a 3 year old from a ‘previous’ relationship. Not a marriage. It should be pretty easy to see the writing on the wall.
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Let him go and focus on you and your baby. Build a new life for you and your child and be the best mother you can be. Love yourself enough to not take him back.
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Start taking care of you and your baby he is gone dont look back
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Don’t speak to him for a few weeks. Let him decide that he misses you and made a mistake or that you’re better off.
You can’t allow yourself to be so, caught up into him that you lose sight of the most important person in your life now, and that is your child is totally dependent on you. Don’t abandon or neglect for the sake of a man who’s, taking the cowardly way out of his responsibility towards you and the child you all created together. Be gkad that he showed his true colors because, if he truly loved you he’ d have never left you abd your new baby. Even, if he had to make the trip he should arranged something, so that he could return back to you all. Sounds like this trip was a civer up for his teue intentions, and maybe he’s planning if not already to reunite with his baby momma! Cry if you must, wipe your tears, get some counseling if you need it, and put on your big girl panties! Show and those around including yourself that, with the help of God you’ll be the best mother and provider ever! Move forward not looking back, and don’t repeat the same mistake again. Get everything that God has for you and he’ll live with the regret of, abandoning you all. And when your child ask where’s her daddy, tell her the truth in love and let her know that it was his loss! Makecsure that she has a strong and responsible group of mentors or male role models, in her life who are trustworthy and won’t let her down! Shower her with wisdom, knowledge, love and correct discipline, and please make sure that she’s connected to church. You will heal and recover and my prayers are with you and your precious little one!
Pray about it and let GOD lead you on what to say and do be bless
First of all you don’t need a man like that in your life, and second , he is demonstrating that he is not capable to handle stress! I’m pretty sure he didn’t get involved in the care of the new born! You don’t need a guy like that in your life. I had ten kid when I leave my ex, he was very abusive and never helped me with the kids , believe me this has been the most amazing years of my life! So if I can do it, you can! Is better to be alone than with the wrong Partner!
Wow… he not coming back
He needs to pay child support if he decides to move on. You and they baby come first
You’re right, he needs to make his own decisions but you can also DECIDE what is best for you and the baby. Yes open communication is essential but he will still need to support the baby if he chooses not to come back. Make him DECIDE and proceed immediately to child support since that can take a while to get into place. Good luck to you and your little one.
It’s unfortunate, that he’s deciding to leave at this particular time. I find it cowardly for him to leave, knowing that he had no intentions on returning. Are you staying with family? I hope that you are because you will need their support if he decides not to return. You can’t make anyone love you or stay in a relationship with you.
It’s important that you ask yourself why would you want to stay in a relationship with someone who appears to have emotionally separated from the relationship? It’s important that you seriously think about the great possibility of him not returning. How do you feel simply thinking about it? What are you going to do to care for your mental and emotional well-being?
Let him decide what he’s going to do and be prepared to accept his decision? Simply listen to what he has to say, say whatever you need to say, but don’t try to guilt him in to staying. If his choice is to leave, then let him go and focus on healing and caring for your precious little one.
Be prepared for emotional pain , heartbreak but you must go through it and don’t allow it to break you down.Talk to your Mom and whoever else you can confide in and accept all support from them through it.Take good care of yourself and your baby.Dont turn to drugs,alcohol and or anything that would neglect your baby.Dont turn to other men or have sex with them to bring you through.Find a church,ask the leaders to pray for you continuously.Dont think that you’re not good enough or not beautiful ,There’s light at the end of the tunnel…
You can’t force someone to be in your life. If he wants to abandon you and your baby let the bastard go. If he comes back let him go again because whoever he left you for didn’t want him either.
Shows you what kind of man he is, a POS. Take your baby and move on, but stop off at the child support court first and file. You got his social security number? Take that with you when you file. You’ll find a long line of single mothers abandoned by baby daddy. Don’t know how they sleep at night walking away from their own children but they do it without flinching, rat bastards that they are. Join the club. It’s an old story. Hold your head up and move on to make a fantastic life for you and your baby.
TIP: Stay out of bed with a man who is not your husband. If you cannot refrain, use protection.