Don’t have sex or allow anything to enter for 30 days. Practice your muscle exercises during this time. Works like a charm.
Have you tried the weighted Ben wa balls? They definitely do help with strengthening the kegals
Kegel (pelvic floor) exercises! Your OB may even be able to recommend other things that may help!
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Start with ab work. We get focused on tightening down there and forget that our bodies and our muscles work together. Crunches, squats, cardio. Tighten up all those muscles girl, and other parts of your body will follow.
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Ok so you definitely need to go to your obgyn anything over the counter isn’t going to help but they can fix it!!!
Pelvic floor exercises
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I have the same problem. My daughter was 9 lbs. I stay constipated. I started tightening mysel by squeezing it down there
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Talk to your obgyn and a physical therapist that specialize in vaginal health! I’m not sure if tagging Instagram handles is allowed in this group, but there’s one I follow on IG that is helpful!
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Obgyn should give you therapy. My first born ripped me bad to my a hole and had to be stitched up. They use a wand and insert things to hold. It helps a lot big difference. If that don’t work plastic surgery is your next option
It’s a him problem…maybe he needs to learn how to actually please you!
This is going to sound bad to others and possibly you but don’t feel bad for thinking that way because it is a very real thing that does happen and i wish my partner actually cared enough to think the way you are right now. I’ve asked her repeatedly to try doing some Kegel exercises, the vagina is after all a muscle and like any other muscle it can be strengthened and “bulked up” by working it often. She refuses. Here is some info on how to do them if you want, if not sorry to bother you. How to do Kegel exercises
To get started:
Find the right muscles. To identify your pelvic floor muscles, stop urination in midstream. Once you’ve identified your pelvic floor muscles you can do the exercises in any position, although you might find it easiest to do them lying down at first.
Perfect your technique. To do Kegels, imagine you are sitting on a marble and tighten your pelvic muscles as if you’re lifting the marble. Try it for three seconds at a time, then relax for a count of three.
Maintain your focus. For best results, focus on tightening only your pelvic floor muscles. Be careful not to flex the muscles in your abdomen, thighs or buttocks. Avoid holding your breath. Instead, breathe freely during the exercises.
Repeat three times a day. Aim for at least three sets of 10 to 15 repetitions a day. And to the women hollering “Surgery” i say no way, bad advice, i would never ask a woman to do that and i don’t think they should. If you can’t solve the problem by doing kegels regularly you can try the “Like a Virgin” stuff but i feel like surgery has risks no matter how “routine” it is and let’s face it that’s not a life threatening problem so any risk at all should not be warranted. In the event that you cannot solve the problem talk to your partner, he may be understanding and supportive and perhaps the two of you together can come up with alternate ways of achieving your goals. The one thing i can’t stand the most about my partner is that she doesn’t want to talk about anything related to sex which would bother me even if i didn’t have issues with out sex life, but since i do it infuriates me. I am understanding of issues and i can be supportive and helpful when it comes to issues but refusing to even talk to me about it let alone do anything about it is driving me over the edge.
Have the rejuvenation surgery. If it’s bothering you that much and it’s really making you feel that bad about yourself then the only person that you’re getting the surgery for is you. Do it for yourself make yourself feel better don’t worry about anybody else.
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Pelvic floor exercises and a strong core
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What?!?! I have 8 kids and have never felt like this
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5 kids over here and what?!?!
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Kegels! I have 4 and have no issue. Do them at stop lights, between chores, etc
Like a virgin and exercise her weighted kegal balls
Pelvic floor therapy! Or the egg things, I’ve seen women use them to exercise. There’s one woman that can hold up weights with hers.
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She didn’t ask how many kids anyone else has and how loose or tight they are,so comments like that aren’t really helping. Everyone is different,don’t make her feel even worse with your useless comments. 
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Talk to your doctor and to your husband. Maybe he doesn’t notice Your husband may have to just try harder. I wish you luck try not to feel bad.
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It’s probably also all scare tissues. Talk to a very experienced gynecological surgeon, make sure he/she have done many Vaginoplasty before. Do many research! I’ve done it, I only had one kid but at the hospital they completely destroyed me so I had to have 2 surgeries to get rid of most of the huge scare tissues and the surgeon also made me tighter, he obviously discussed it with me before. It hurts like hell after surgery so be sure you have help at home and with the kids. And you get right pain medication immediately after surgery when you wake up.
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Just came here to say YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID❣️
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It is so sad to see how mean people can be and not even care! Just because you don’t think her problem is important to you doesn’t mean you need to go out of your way to make her feel horrible abt it. People that do this obviously have some self esteem issues of their own. Need to make themselves feel better I guess by knocking others. The world is a sad place!
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There is a solution. It’s called vaginal rejuvenation. There are two types one using radio frequency the other using laser. I had radio frequency because of dryness. It tightens a lot and brings back moisture. It worked for me. It also helps with bladder incontinence issues. I had three treatments and that was enough. Then I found online a home machine using radio frequency. It’s easy to use, not quite as powerful as the professional model so you use it a bit more often at first. A couple of times a week for 20 minutes. It’s just warm. It’s Silk’n brand and a lot less than going ti a dermatologist. Works for me
That is not normal. Giving birth does not permanently change the vagina unless you had an atypical severe injury. Kegels tone pelvic floor muscles but if yours were damaged you may need surgery to repair it.
Vaginas are made of accordion-like folds that are able to expand around an infant during birth without stressing the tissue fibers. The perineum is not which is why it often tears or an episiotomy is done. The perineum should be stitched together if the tearing is moderate to severe but it heals. The pelvic floor muscles can lose tone from inactivity or from tearing internally during birth but should also heal back to normal within a year of giving birth. Normal childbirth does not make vaginas “wide” or “loose”.
They have tightening cream at sex shops, try that?
There’s a FB frugal page that may help with ideas.
It’s crazy that people don’t or can’t be nice! Please visit a dr they have tons of new procedures to help with this!
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Pelvic thrusts floor exercises. I have 4 kids and no issues. Kegels work better for urine flow control not for vaginal tightness.
Release yourself from this belief that your worth is tied to the satisfaction of his sexual desires. That isn’t your responsibility. If he isn’t enjoying sex with you for some reason, it’s up to him to communicate his preferences.
Also and equally as important, get our of your head and into your body. Slow it all way down and figure out what actually does feel good to you and then do a lot of that! Remember you are a beautiful, magical, devine goddess of a woman. Own that shit and enjoy the body you live in 
Original poster***you really should talk to your doctor. If it’s this bad, then you may need more than keegal exercises. You may need some kind of surgery. Hope you get your problem solved, because you should in no way feel this way. Good luck!
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Your nor alone mine is so broken I may need to to have corrective surgery according to my gyno
Good luck honey. Sorry for all the bad talk & shaming going on here. I would agree that it’s most likely scar tissue. Talk to a doctor. Hope you find a solution… Take care 
I’m not judging or laughing, I feel for you and respect your feelings. With that said though, something you wrote stuck out at me; “it has at times made me feel like leaving this world…” simply put, that is terrible and I am sorry. You need to focus on your life. You are blessed to have kids who are the source of this problem. You are blessed to have life, to be living. Those kids are what matters and they need a mother. Who’s body is the same after kids? Hell, after 2 mine has changed I can only imagine 4. You are blessed. Sure, sex is nice but it is not life. I rather live a long happy life with my children, my family,my husband -then have sex… if your partner leaves bc of this issue then good riddance!!! That’s not love. That’s not a reason to go. So, I get that you feel badly about yourself- who doesn’t at times? I get that you want to try to fix the problem. But, what if you can’t? You learn to live with what you have and what you have is pretty amazing. Love yourself and I pray that you spend a very long time on earth and are happy…and remember, that in the scheme of things it is such a minuscule reason to want to leave it…
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All jokes aside… buy a penis sleeve…
There are pelvic floor specialists that can help you in a more targeted way 
But your outcomes are normal or expected after childbirth 
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Definitely talk to your doctor. Kegals only do so much.
Pelvic floor specialists are physical therapists (look up one that specializes in your need) Get a good physical therapist, if it isn’t getting any better, have surgery.
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Pelvic Floor Therapist
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I would talk to your doctor!
How do you use a tenns unit for vaginal tightening Iv never heard of that genuinely curious
Like a virgin it’s sold by pure Romance I love it so much
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They can stitch you up tighter go to your doctor. Don’t suffer over it . There’s a simple solution!
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Kegals or vaginal weights . I would talk to your doctor . I had 5 kids but only 2 natural lol
Pelvic floor therapist. And then go from there to see what your options are.
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Your vagina goes back to it’s shape after. You must have underlying issues, maybe your pelvic floor has partially collapsed, or you need some other help. Please go to the doc, I know it’s an embarrassing this to go for, but this is for your health girl, something more may be wrong than you know. It took me 2 years to go to the doc and understand that I wasn’t loose I needed surgical help because things never went back to were they were supposed to
I mean…is it possible…its not u…and ur fine…maybe hes smaller than average…
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I think they can do surgery for you hun
Vaginal rejuvenation
Seriously talk to your OB, I’m sure they deal with this sort of thing often and just might have really good suggestions for you. And for the love of all that is holy talk to your partner, give him an opportunity to calm your fears and nerves he just might surprise you.
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Definitely doc…you can fix that issue
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The right doctor can fix this for you…don’t think insurance will pay tho…
See your OB/GYN first about this. They can refer you to a pelvic floor therapist, then if the issue needs to be further addressed, they can discuss surgery.
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Yeah talk to the OB. Your vagina is a muscle and if it doesn’t expand and contract properly, something is wrong I think.
Tell your partner you need oral or clitoral stimulation. A lot of women do. Then go see your doctor and discuss your options.
Tell your partner you need oral or clitoral stimulation. A lot of women do. Then go see your doctor and discuss your options.
Vaginal rejuvenation?
My first I ripped going to the bathroom I fainted. After my second child I had a postera repair surgery. The MD that deliver my second child he did the repair. Let me tell ya they go inside and do stuff there which I didn’t know I was so sore.
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You need a bigger man.
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This is something you should speak to your gynecologist about
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I wonder if this is more nerve damage than it is a matter of being “loose”. Just a thought.
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I had one doctors intern cut and sew me weird and then another doctor “fixed” it on the next baby. I would DEFINITELY talk to your doc first.
Vaginal rejuvenation. It’s a non surgical procedure. It’s like a lazor treatment you do 3 times. (Just a wand they insert) I had it done because I’ve had 5 kids and my bladder control went to shit. It helped sooooooooo much. And of course kegel balls which you can get from Amazon you can change out the weights so you can really feel the progress.
I had 6 kids and don’t have that problem. Kegals, all the way. I’m now 50 yrs old and still do kegals.
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Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy.
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Talk to your gyn dr. Seek out a pelvic floor specialist, some physical trainers have this dual training. It may not be as wide as you think, but more nerve damage. There are exercises and even surgeries to fix this.
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I wouldn’t use loose, buy I can understand not feeling engaged in those muscles. Seek a pelvic floor specialist. After kids and stress on our pelvic floor sometimes it’s hard to feel or recognize it when we engage it. Pelvic floor therepy is super helpful in finding a balance to navigating a fatigued pelvic
I would go see a doctor honestly. Pelvic floor therapist to see what’s going on. Kegals can make it worse if you don’t know exactly what’s going on. Pelvic floor therapist will be able to give you a catered to you plan.
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Squats are actually really good for pelvic floor strength!
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Rachel Berger-Chametsky, just another reason why I love you:heart:
You need some “like a Virgin”
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I would like to ask if you can feel any sensation else where. Cause if you can’t, might be nerve damage. And I know some people like to keep intimate things “vanilla” but maybe this could be an opportunity to spice up the bedroom activities and do different things, re-explore and see if there’s anything new you like (and in my experience, no matter how old they are, guys love to explore new things in the bedroom)
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Have you tried talking to your gynecologist? That should be your first step. Let them examine you. Your issue may be something more serious requiring surgery. They also have something called vaginal rejuvenation surgery that tightens you up. But first, you need to go to your gyn.
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Need to see your obgyn and a PT specialist that specializes in pelvic floor. I have 4 kids, first two are 17 months apart in age and twins who are 8 months old. I don’t have issues there, it’s not something you have to deal with. Pelvic floor PT does wonders. Good luck!
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I recommend daily walks, squatting, and working on your adductor muscles. When I went back to working out my legs at the gym, my boyfriend commented that it felt “tighter”.
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I’ve had 4 kids and my tightening is on point lol kettles my friend, exercise it, if not well then that’s just not the way you was made and it is what it is
It doesn’t work quite like that……Get a new partner honey! He just ain’t it
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Girl Keagles Keagles Keagles Keagles but if you think there is an actual issue than I recommend speaking to your ob
My first she ripped me from the tip of my clit to my butt hole my clit is still split in two I had 33+ stitches and she still couldn’t sew em all up my second no tearing but I have a feeling they did the husband stitch even tho I was already tight and wouldnt mind some stretching it hurts to even have a finger in there I am so tight but best bet kegals however the f you spell it
It sounds more like you’ve lost sensation but he may not notice because it feels fine and great to him
I had a bladder prolapse and a colon prolapse. Doctor fixed it with surgery and now mine is in tip top shape
So I have had 3 -9 Lb babies naturally. I get it! Trust me it still feels good for him. I worry about you. There should still be enjoyment for you. We started spicing it up with toys … toys that I can feel tight around. My husband is not small but the body does change. We both enjoy giving each other pleasure no matter how derived. I will say that the more time that goes by it will reduce some … but never as it was. My Husband doesn’t seem bothered by it at all. We have also dabbled in anal which gives him a tight squeeze occasionally. But that is a personal choice and takes work and communication on both parts. You should be able to tell him how you feel and he should assure you none of that matters. Work on communication and self esteem… if he can’t handle your changes as a mother then he will not be the one you want to grow old with… lots of changes there! Good luck!