I Need Ideas on How to Be Tighter After Four Kids

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"Please don’t judge or laugh, but after having 4 children I am quite wide down there, I can’t even barely feel my partner, he is younger than me and I'm so scared he’s going to leave me, I know it seems silly and with so much going on in the world for to be so hung up on something that may not be a big deal to others, but it has at times made me feel like leaving this world. I’ve done kegel stuff I even bought a tenns machine, but nothing really changing, it’s really getting me down, I ripped really bad with my first and had to have so many stitches, but some ripped and was never fixed, but after my fourth baby it’s just worse, anyone else ever felt the same"

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The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"Pelvic floor excersises and maybe seeing a doctor in regards to a repair maybe"

"Pelvic floor therapy"

"You can ask your obgyn for a pelvic floor restoration. Childbirth is something that causes weakness in those muscles. Most insurances will cover it if done by obgyn for “medical reasons “ rather than cosmetic. Usually weak bladder, etc. Easily covered. Look into it. I wasn’t loose - but did have bladder issues and the doc actually mentioned it to me and said my pelvic floor seemed weak after childbirth- it and it was like being a virgin again afterward. Just saying. Best surgery I ever had. Not “rejuvenated” but medically “restored pelvic muscles."

"There is surgery for this. I know it could be pricey but there is a rejuvenation you can look into. Hope you get the help to make yourself feel better"

"Maybe talk to your doctor about seeing a pelvic rehabilitation specialist, a lot of women don't know how to actually do kegels right and can make things worse by toning the wrong muscles or just doing nothing at all, it's like physical therapy in a lot of ways and there's exercises other than kegels that are more effective"

"Pelvic floor PT, I needed 8 months after each kiddo due to SPD and partial bladder prolapse."

"There’s a surgery called vagina rejuvenation and also pelvic floor surgery u can go for a check first and see what the doctor is recommending u to have but I know the vagina rejuvenation is very good one of my friends had it and said its best thing she ever did for herself."

"Have you spoken to him about it? What you are feeling is not what he is feeling."

"Not a laughing matter. I’m sorry you’re going through this. Have you tried talking to your doctor (OB) about it? They might have advice to help! Or be able to repair your old stitches! You’re not alone in this. Try talking to your partner about it too, don’t let this eat you up alone. Honestly, even though you might not be feeling him, I’m sure he has no idea, and he’s still enjoying himself lol. Good luck!"

"That’s not tightness honey. You’ve lost sensations down there. Go talk to your doctor I bet they have lots of options."

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