I offer my mom money to babysit but she will not take it: Advice?

My mom watches my two year old son and 6 year old daughter while I attend school. She watches them 4 hours for three days. She also cooks. She takes my daughter to school also. I have offer her money but she doesn’t accepts. Should I keep on insisting or leave it? I feel bad and I want her to accept it because my step dad doesn’t like her babysitting my kids and I think if I gave her money, he won’t say anything

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Fuck your step dad lol she’s your mom she probably like spending time with her grandkids if he don’t like it he can suck a butt. If she refused money give her a gift or a card with a gift card as a thank yu

She might take it as insult you wanting to pay her. She doesn’t want to be thought of as a babysitter, she’s perfectly content just being grandma. Maybe take your mom out to a nice dinner or a spa day together to show your thanks :slight_smile:

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A ) It’s not up to him if she chooses to spend time with her grandbabies.
B ) You’ve offered and she has declined. I would just tell her how much you appreciate her and help her with things when needed.
My parents would never in a million years take anything for watching my kids. That is special time for them to be together.

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She could just love being with her grandbabies she can see you are trying to better yourself also another reason why she might not charge :heart::heart::hugs:

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Grandma’s love spending time with their grand babies. Plus, it probably makes her happy to know that she can help you. If her husband has a problem with it then your mom should address that. Your mom should be able to watch her grand babies whenever is allowed without him fussing over it. Its good bonding tine with the children and you get to leave them with someone you trust.

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My mom wouldn’t and still accept money from me for babysitting. Back when I was in school and she was helping me quite a bit we’d plan shopping dates and I’d treat her to meal at The Keg or Red Lobster, it came to be like a monthly tradition.

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Maybe slip her a gift card to her favorite shopping place or restaurant. Or fix her a gift basket of her favorite treats. Or just slide her a little cash in a thank you card.

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Maybe you could bring snacks over for the kids. Or once a month take her out to dinner. So that way she doesn’t think you’re paying her but you kind of are, and you’re showing her that you appreciate what she does for you.

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Give up. Lol. My parents never take money for watching or doing something for the kids even when we offer.

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Sounds like step dad might be jealous of the grandbabies to me. Honestly, go with what Jessi says. Take her out for a nice dinner or something one of these days to show thanks. She just likes spending time with the babies when she’s able to. As long as she’s not struggling to care for them in terms of her not being good health wise and such than I don’t see why he wouldn’t be okay with it.

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Jade did u post this lol

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Pay her in other ways, treat her, do thoughtful stuff more often. Moms love that shit.

Just do something nice for her since she won’t take money. Pay for a spa day and maybe a gift card to her favorite restraunt and put it in a card showing your appreciation to both of them.

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I’ve never offered my mom money for watching my son. Now I feel like an ass lol. But I do buy her stuff and treat her to dinners and everything.

Maybe offer her something other than money. Maybe help with something or buy her a gift basket of stuff to pamper herself for a gift card to go out somewhere.

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Lucky you. My mom doesn’t watch my kids

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Since she won’t take cash you could just put money up and buy her a vacation package or spa visit or something nice for her. That you wouldn’t normally be able to do.

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My mother watches my boys quite often & she won’t take money. In return, I randomly buy her dinner or little things I know she uses regularly. If I happen to drive her veh, even if I barely use any gas, I top it off.

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My mum would probably slap me if I offered her money to look after the twins. Grandmothers love their grandchildren more than they love us! My mum was brutally honest when I asked her. She said the love she has for my kids is completely different with my sister and I :joy::joy: she outright said she loves the twins more than us. Your mum is amazing for wanting to spend so much time with her grandkids. Don’t mind your step dad. Children are innocent and even if they have behavioural problems they are still children and innocent! Try and take your mum out for a meal or coffee (my mum loves Starbucks and a panini :joy:) once a month just the two of you and get a babysitter just for a couple of hours so you two can catch up. She will appreciate it!

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Your Mom is not “babysitting”, she is spending quality time with her grandkids. If your step-dad were any kind of man, he would think of you as his own and those would be his grandkids as well and he would cherish his time with them.

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What a fabulous mother you have!

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Marlen why you posting stuff lol

My parents watch my 2 yr old while my husband and I are at work…5 days a week for 9+ hours a day and they won’t take money. What I do is try to provide everything for her (diapers/wipes/food). And anytime we pick up something for them not related to our daughter we always tell them not to worry about it when they ask how much they owe us. You could just pick up little things here and there that she might need or want and say “I saw this and thought of you so I got it…”. Some parents just like being grandparents and can afford to not need the money…I know I’m blessed in that way…but I get where you’re coming from.

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My mom is a huge support when I need it. I do nice little things for her when I can, just to show how appreciated she is.

Buy a thank you card and put money in it or giftcard to her favorite place. Show you appreciate it. Then maybe ur stepdad feel better about.

Bring over some groceries if she won’t take money.

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My mom was the same way, just make her take it, leave it somewhere, or go buy her things she needs & or would want and bring it to her and let her know you appreciate all she does for you.

Put money aside and send her on a killer vacation!

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Screw what your step dad wants if your mother is happy helping you that’s all that matters maybe put aside the money you were going to give her a treat her to dinner or lunch

What about gift cards for gas or grocery store? Prepay electric bill, etc.

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I think if step dad is mad he should mind his own business if he’s not the one looking after them. Save up money and pay attention buy her something she either reallly wants or really deserves.

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Just do something nice for her instead?
Im one of those people who hate taking money from others, as much as they insist.
Maybe take her out to lunch or something?

See my mom watches my son for me 1 day a week and 2 days a week if i work on Saturday. I pay her for the days she watches him and she gladly accepts the money but my step dad is like, you don’t have to pay us for watching him. Personally i feel better paying her if I’m working since it helps her out.

I would do gift cards so they can go out for dinner or gas cards since she takes kids to school.

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I would maybe once every two weeks make something your mother loves? Or maybe pay for her to do something nice for herself? Maybe give her monthly fun times with all of you to experience something new? A hike through somewhere? A drive around showing new things? A trip to make memories over a weekend to a dish hatchery/aquarium maybe?

My mom has never accepted money for watching my kids. She cooks for them, helps with homework, and anything else needed. She enjoys time with her grandkids. If you have offered and she has declined, that should be the end of it. However, if she needs a little financial help, offer it. My mom has asked me for $20 for gas until the end of the week and I’m more than happy to do it. Family helps family. This is why if I’m able to watch a friend’s kid, I don’t take money for doing it either. I’m fortunate to have to pay for child care, and enjoy being able to help others as well.

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I’m a grandma. I watch my grand daughters every other weekend when my daughter and her husband both have to work. I drive 2 hours to their house and stay the weekend. I’d NEVER take money from them. I want that quality time with my grand daughters. It has made us very close. I like the idea of a spa day, or other gift. And if my husband ever said I couldn’t watch my grand kids I don’t think he’d still be my husband !

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Maybe buy her a gift certificate for favorite restaurant or get a nail manicure n pedicure maybe hair cut n something just for her ?

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Buy her some groceries & say they’re snacks for the kids. Put a bit of your parents’ favorite snacks in there too. :blush:

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If she doesn’t want paid try other ways to just kinda show the appreciation. Nice dinner or a gift here and there. Maybe bring flowers every once and a while.

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Maybe take her out for a nice manicure, or in a card, give her a gas or food card. Maybe buy groceries for her place…stuff you know she likes (not just stuff for the kids). Its nice that your offering, and most moms usually wouldn’t take money. Its sweet she does that.

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Cheyenne had some good ideas too.

Can I just say you are sooo lucky! Maybe try doing something for her or ever now and then leave a gift card in her purse without her knowing with a card and tell her how much you appreciate what she does.

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she loves your kids and doesnt mind and probally enjoys the time she can have with them i have done the same thing and though i was offered money i couldnt take it because theywere my grand kids and loved having that time with them so just send her some flowrs or give her a gift with a thank you card and let her know you appreciate her

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If she won’t accept money get her a massage voucher. Every woman loves them lol

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Pay for them both to go out to dinner somewhere nice

Take her and your step dad out to dinner. Always nice to have a family dinner or even just offer to cook for them and have them over for dinner.

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Do something nice for them both ever so often as a thank you would be nice.

Give them gift certificate to grocery, the restaurant they like, manicure, beauty shop, make cassarole they love, do something at least once a month. Show appreciation.

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im not sure if someone already mention this, but you can buy groceries for her house, don’t tell her though, just show up with some groceries to her house specially since you mention that she cooks for your kids aswell. your mom sounds like a great gradma!

My mom watches my son for me and refuses to take payment but anytime she goes out of town (they ride harleys and will do a few runs a year) i house/dog sit for her. I have also been told I’m watching after her in her old age :joy:

I think you can only offer someone money a few times.
Or simply just buy other stuff for her like petrol or something like that :slight_smile:

If you think she could use the money leave it she’d appreciate it but if she’s well off don’t worry about it as far as her husband people r weird make sure ur kids r ok at ur moms good luck :four_leaf_clover:

If your mother has refused money for baby sitting your children, put that money into canister, at the end of your need for mom’s sitting, take the canister and put it in her kitchen and tell her it’s your thank you can with a note of love and for all she has done to help you, take the kids and leave quietly. Call her couple of weeks later, she could be angry or appreciate what you have done. Then again there could a reason why she’s not accepting money for babysitting.

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I am a grandmother of two amazing grandsons under the age of 4 and will never accept money to spend the time I do with them while they both work, the bonding time with them means the world to me and yes a lunchdate, or small talk over coffee is nice once in a while to show the apprectiation and all the thank you I need when I see my lil ones smiling face when they come over !! They will have those memories of being with grandma when the time comes and I am no longer here with them and those moments will be theirs to cherish . So please don’t take it personal when we say no money we just want time with our babies

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Grab a gift certificate to a Gas station, grocery store, walmart ect. Just do nice gestures when you can!

Leave it in her purse and deny u out it there

You now those are your mammas little bad angels don’t feel bad she does it cause she love you and your baby s god bless you all

None of your step dad’s damn business. If your mum doesn’t want to take your money, she doesn’t have to. Maybe get her a nice gift to let her know you appreciate everything she does for you.

I say maybe bring over some groceries or something. Maybe call and pay the gas bill. Shit she can’t stop you from doing.

Buy her a gift card to her favorite restaurant

Treat her once in a while instead. Take her for dinner. Take her for a pedicure. Buy her a new candle or something like that. Sounds like a good grandma for them! And she probably lives having them around.

Put the money in a savings account then give her it after 6
Months.Without your step dad knowing of course

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Honestly I’m the type of person I can’t anyone let anything for me for free. That’s just me. So when/if my mom watches my son a day or two out the week I will literally sneak the $ into her purse if she refuses or put it in the visor of her car. Lol. Not a lot if it’s a few hours I’ll slip her a $20 or something along those lines. She always refused and said she just enjoys spending time with her grandson but let’s be real who doesn’t like cash. I’d rather pay her whom I trust with my life than a stranger.

Just leave it they are her grandkids she probably loves watching them. Your stepdad needs to get over it.

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Why does your stepdad not like your mother babysitting her own grandchildren? Money won’t change his mind. Pay a bill for her or get her grocery or fuel vouchers if you feel you need too. She sounds like she loves being with her grandchildren and helping you out. She is making memories and bonding with those babies and that is priceless!

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If she says no. I would offer to taker to get a meal or mani pedi kinda thing. None of the grandfolks take money from us. They love spending time with our kid.

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My mom’s the same so I do stuff , once I paid her rent , iv paid different bills and I almost always buy her groceries

Your mum may be making a stand of her own telling your stepfather she will have her grandchildren if she wants too.

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Get her a gift or something, take her out when you can. Doesn’t have to be money I’m sure she’d appreciate time with you doing something you both enjoy over money if she insists she doesn’t want it give her a good memory :blush:

Just let her, her pay is spending time with her grandchildren! If your stepdad doesnt like it, he can do one cos to your mum her grandchildren come first!

Save an amount each week n send ur mum n stepdad away for the weekend somewhere they would love but wouldn’t t treat themselves

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Hmm. set it aside invest or save it? the money saved for a sitter to maybe do something really nice for her, or incase something unexpected comes along. Call in on her power bill lol

Make a separate interest bearing bank account. Deposit money into it weekly and after so long give it to her.

She enjoys it like I did. Loved every minute of it I’m am grandma.

Think with your heart…what can you do for her that she either can’t ,Wouldn’t, or wishes…start with picture of her and grandkids maybe ask stepfather if he would like to be in it…

My mother in law said this “That is my grandbaby! No way in hell will i let you pay me. I get my payment from spending time with him” she doesn’t believe in grandparents charging for time with their grandchildren. Put the money in a savings account for when they go to college

Love this- that what I would appreciate! I would not accept money but would love a dinner with my shopping with my daughter, gift card or a spa pampering!