Hi, any mums/dads on here that no longer with the kid’s biological father/mother. How do you go about being in a new relationship when you have full custody off your child/children without it becoming a complete issue with the biological father as i have just got into a new relationship i don’t intend on introducing him to my little girl until I feel the time is right but I think her father will have something to say about it even though it will make him two-faced as he brought a lady onto contact and denied she was anything to do with him which later down the line it comes out that she was his girlfriend, and also it turned out it was his girlfriend that did everything for our child whilst on contact with him, so he’s happy to introduce his girlfriends to our child but I have a strange feeling that I just cant seem to shake off he isn’t going to be happy about me introducing our child to anyone I am in a relationship with. Please no bashing any good advice will be extremely appreciated
First of all you have to stand on your two feet .
You are no longer with. Ex.
If he has anything to say about it
We call that still controling you.
Move on with you life.
Because he sure will
Dont work yourself up over something that hasn’t happened yet.
Once you’re ready to introduce the new guy to your little, then I would consider how the ex will respond. Even then, maybe just let it go in passing that you’ve started a new relationship and be clear with the fact new dude ain’t around the little yet.
Orrr just do you and fuck what the ex has to think about it hes an EX and sorry not sorry but your ex doesn’t get to stipulate your dating life.
Why are his feelings any of your concern? Seems like he’s still controlling you, you have a right to your life and you certainly don’t need his permission
Who cares what he thinks… He was a new girlfriend so you can have a new boyfriend. Let him get his knickers in a twist if he wants
Question is why do you even care?
Co parenting is tough. If you really want to do it a “proper” way… when the time is right, maybe introduce you boyfriend to your child’s father first. Remember all the things you didn’t like about the way his father handled a new girlfriend and remind yourself not be a hypocrite. What’s best for this child is to be comfortable and happy and not feeling like he’s in the middle of childish petty baby mama/ baby daddy drama. A new person in both of your lives= more people who love n care for you child
In my situation my daughter’s father keeps switching girlfriends every 3-6 months and dragging my little girl into it. His current one already thinks she’s got rights to my daughter but is about to find out how wrong she is. Meanwhile I’ve been married to the same man for 7 years and my kids didn’t just meet him after a week of dating. I have a problem with the amount of random people being paraded around my child. I don’t know them, how they are, what they might do. So I tend to have a problem with new people. Just my opinion🤷
I totally get it. My ex left me for a 22yo while I was pregnant. She was always “a friend.” All the girls he saw after were “friends.” 
. Let him go. Stop worrying about what he thinks. Live your life. Do what’s best for you and your child. I’m currently dating a wonderful man now for 3 years. We moved in with each other last year. My ex still hasn’t met him 
. Your job is to take care of you. You no longer have to worry about his feelings. Period.
If you are taking your time about it and you feel like it’s something that could be long term , why do you even care what he says ? As long as your kid is your priority and not your vagina , who cares.
It’s your self-esteem.
Be more concerned with how your child is going to feel about it than how your ex is going to react. You are probably correct that he won’t like it. It’s not his decision though, it’s yours and as long as you keep your child as your main concern then the rest will fall into place. I hope it goes well no matter what you decide and just know that you are entitled to have companionship in your life. Being a mother doesn’t exclude you from having romance.
So you’re ASSUMING without even having a conversation with him and asking strangers. No wonder you aren’t together. You’re over here complaining about how he handled a girlfriend yet you’re basically doing the same thing. Realize folks we’re all only getting one side of the side story here. It’s also about the well being and safety of your child. How comfortable is she going to be?
His feelings are not your concern. It’s nice of you to think that but he did not take yours into consideration. From experience handle it like a business arrangement. Offer to introduce, warn the blood father that you will be Introducing someone eventually. See if he wants to meet and handle it differently. But do not allow him to manipulate your relationship. He has his spouse/gf around the child and so can you. You don’t need anyone permission.
It’s your business not his .he sounds like he has control issues with you. And make sure you keep a close eye and protect you child with your new relationships good luck👍
There is nothing wrong with taking his feelings into consideration but at the same time its ultimately up to you and your child. Every parent should consider the other no matter what, I definately feel maybe meeting the child first is always good. Just from personal experience anyway. My biggest concern was always what my daughter thought if she/he doesn’t feel comfortable with that person 90% its for a good reason. There is always the chance the child will just not like someone else bc its not their parent but kids do tend to have a good feeling about someone as far as a creep factor. You hace to do whats right for you and your child no matter what…good luck to you momma 
I think your making assumptions and maybe over thinking…as you say your not going to introduce your child to him yet …if he does say anything give him a gentle reminder of his behaviour? At the end of the day it’s your child who is the priority not your ex or his girlfriend …good luck
At the end of the anything he has to say about your relationships means nothing, it’s not his business, do what makes u happy
Who the hell is he when he wasn"t there for her ever even never & just depicted a man of his own virtue…but even although I leave that with her & her understanding of the inbetween between you & him…Are you going to dwell the past into your own future & complicate it or better leave them to decide as adults & or your taught upbringing to result a lonely self of you as men may despise of themselves as a father figure but as an a ex-husband father disfigure what you want…I know it’s hard but your kids grow fonder to the heart that was there for them most & dad just wasn’t & even if screw him you need love & more too why spoil it for a man just because he was dad but never true…seriously he is out of the equation let them deal with it any other way would be a no go zone ijs but for real now…I would talk to my child & try to make them understand…their dad should have no interference unless the child sees otherwise fit & not judge the mother espescially when she was there for the child & upbringing more than just he was & he just didn’t fulfill his role as a dad so what obligation is that screw muslim law or even white supremacy we are human respect is far most & should be the uppermost respected espescially women…
I’m not a parent but I believe that it should be your choice when to introduce the little ones to your new partner… obviously not at first since you don’t know where the relationship is going but after some time of getting to know each other and deciding if they’re the one for you then that’ll be the right time… I think you’ll know when the time is right and it’s not up to the biological father when that time should be, if you want to be respectful of him then maybe give him a heads up when it’s time but really I think it’s all on you and when YOU think the time is right… good luck and I wish the best for all parties!
For me…my son never met anyone I was simply dating. He met the man I married because we were that serious and talking about living together. His father brought women in and out if his life. I didn’t agree with it but he does not parent like me. You have to let go of the idea y’all will agree on everything. Pick your battles.
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. You didn’t really say definitively but it sounds like his “girlfriend” treats your child well. That’s a good thing. I always waited until I was sure the guy I was dating was worthy of a meet with my kids. If it wasn’t something that was long term, I didn’t want them to interact with my children. One breakup is hard enough, didn’t want someone I didn’t know super good around my girls. As for your ex, certainly he knows/knew that this situation was going to arise. I don’t think he expected you to not move on and start a new romantic relationship. If there is strife, remind him that he obviously has moved on and introduced your children to his “new” girlfriend. Like most men, immature masters if the universe, he may make a fuss because he realizes he has lost that element if control over you. Stand up for yourself. You deserve to be happy and have romantic love just like all of us! Good luck.
Let’s see I like the idea of not introducing your child to boyfriend not knowing how it is going to go. As far as the daddy is concerned why should you worry if he already has a girlfriend? And then my first thought is your not over the ex yet if your so concerned about his reactions and not introducing your daughter is the best. As he has clearly moved on. Take it slow being with someone new has you excited but scared your gut might be trying to tell you something is not quite right with the new guy. Or don’t worry so much about how your ex will feel and do what makes you happy putting yourself first is ok cause being happy only beings out the best you. Since you seem to be an over thinker stay focused on you and your daughter cause that’s what is important go be you 
Rule # 1
Who gives a shit what he thinks. Not his business.
Move on from him sounds like he’s still holding you back.
There is no issue. Introduce them when you feel like it’s the right time. To hell with your ex, it’s none of his business.
It’s how you feel when you feel is right. As long as it’s not every Tom dick n harry you need to only worry about how you feel and how your child feels that is it.
It’s completely none of his business what you do during your time with your child he has no say and is entitled to no opinion- as are you in the reverse while he has his time with your child.
In saying that, take plenty of time to be sure about bringing new people into your childs life save hurt and confusion if it doesn’t work out as you’d hoped.
None of his business unless you let him run your life…
No matter how much u love this new person just remember don’t leave randos around your kiddos… 
This should have been about you and your child meeting who it is your dating but your more worried about what your X might think? Are u still sleeping with your X to aside? Cause when a relationship is over? It’s over and you don’t have to explain or be seeking for your X blessing cause he might not like your new man. I’d be more concern if your new man will be a good positive role model for your daughter.
He had his say! Done…
Sounds like your more concerned about your exs feelings then your current boyfriend just an observation
If u have been with this guy longer than 6 months then it’s fine. He shouldn’t tell u what to do
It’s none of his business. As long as the child is safe there isn’t a damned thing he can do about it. Don’t stress just live your life.
Who gives a shit what your ex feels. Do what’s good for you and your child. Fuck him.
Your ex cannot control who you see or who you introduce your child to. As long as you’ve been dating this guy for awhile and feel there may be a future, don’t bother with caring how your ex feels. Especially if he was shady about his girlfriend. Just make sure your daughter is comfortable with it and you’re good to go.
Why care about how your ex will feel? Hes your ex for a reason, dont let him dictate your relationships. When you’re ready to introduce your new love to your daughter, do it. Your ex needs to trust your judgment.
His opinion or input doesn’t matter
He just has to get over the fact that you’re going to be with someone. He can’t control you and your relationships. I’ve been there. I waited a month to introduce my son to my current boyfriend. You just have to straight tell your ex you are seeing someone and are going to be introducing the child/children to him.
Its really not that hard. I always introduce my bf to my daughters dad before he met my daughter and even then it took me 5 months to introduce them. It’s not as bad as it seems but then again my ex and I are on good terms and co parent 50/50.
I think you still got some sort of feelings for him, because truth be told he if he’s already introduce his gf, he probably don’t give a shit, you’re just thinking into it too much. I met my boyfriends kids within the first month but also one of the kids mothers abandoned her for close to a year, so that played a part in it. She was more worried that her ex was in a relationship with someone else than she was her kids. You literally don’t even know what your ex is going to say, you’re just assuming he’s going to be mad. As long as your child is comfortable with meeting him, it shouldn’t be an issue.
My ex brought his gf almost right away… smh well they knew eachother in grade school so all I required was to meet her before shes around my daughters . With my bf I waited a year before I committed to a relationship and anyone I seen or talked to would never be in front of my daughters I would meet up with them when they were gone on weekends. And me and my current bf talked for like 7 months before we got together officially and waited a bit for him to be around the girls
You obviously are more thoughfut and mature than the child’s father. Good on you for taking your time to introduce anyone into your daughter’s life.
I trust you to know when the time is right. The father has no say in the matter. He has already demonstrated he has no issue with new people being brought into your daughter’s life.
He will probably be with someone else by the time you are ready to let a man meet your child.
Good luck.
maybe casually introduce the two guys first but honestly unless theres any stipulations in the custody agreement, just introduce him to your daughter when you feel its best
I always had a 6 month rule while dating cause if you can’t be with me that long and be respectful of my single motherhood then not worth meeting my children. Plus true colors tend to come out around that amount of time and with my man we didn’t introduce our kids to each other for over a year (bad experiences on both sides) that’s just my thoughts, good luck!
I’m sorry but I’m old school in my thinking. If you were in a relationship and had a child and that child lives with you. Your sole responsibility is to that child. You dont have the luxury of going out and bringing men home. You need to set an example at an early age show that child self respect. Do any of you have any idea on how damaging it is to see your mom going from one failed relationship to another? Show your child your independence and self worth. Now when your child is at an age were they can defend themselves verbally and physically then maybe think about dating. It’s not fair to your children.
Unless there is a court order against it, he has no say in it or unless your friends are sex offenders.
His opinion doesn’t really matter.
Just do it when you feel it’s right. He can be mad if he wants but at the end of the day who you bring around your kid is your choice.
Why should it matter you both have gone your own ways. His girlfriend has meet her why can’t you introduce your fellow to her.
Me and my husband waiting around 5 months before I met his little girl. I also had a very long chat with her mum and met her beforehand. This was 3 years ago, me and my step daughter are now best friends and so so close. I love the very bones of her and she loves me too. We built up seeing eachother, making sure her and her daddy still had plenty of 1 on 1 time and that onwasnt always there when he had her. I think that definitely helped as she knew I wasnt taking her daddy away and she was still number 1!
My ex and I separated 8 years ago. My husband has been around since my daughter was 3 months old. My ex hates him even though he’s a deadbeat. He has no say and we don’t consult him for a damn thing. His opinions are null and void.
I always think it’s a bad idea for the kids to get introduced to your bf before you have been together for a loooong time and it actually seems like its going somewhere.
Making an official introduction is completely different than them spending an afternoon at a restaurant together with others as well.
Ignore whatever he has to say, not his business anymore.
Looks like you dont need permission. He already set that bar when he has someone around your daughter. Dont need anyone controlling who you get to see anyway.
None of his business. Why worry about his opinion… So what you have moved on. He just build a bridge and get over it.
You wait until you feel right then do it!! You’re the mom! You know best!! The fact that you even worry about this speaks so much for who you are as a mother!! You’re doing amazing! You deserve happiness and he should have no say in it!
Once your ready and your 100% sure it’s time just text him. Tell him that your ready to introduce your partner to your daughter. How long youv been together etc etc. Dont ask permission but make him aware.
Something along the lines of
Hi …, just to make you aware and incase you have any questions I have been in a relationship for …months and I am ready to introduce him to our daughter. I wanted to make you aware as (daughters names) dad. I hope you can support this, if you have any questions please feel free to contact me
Thank you.
Im sure he will but if you wait a while date him 1st get to know him real well beofre you do it, your child Father shouldn take it easier bc he sees hes sticking around and hopefully benefitting your life