My partner is constantly looking at other people when we go out. I understand everyone has a sneaky look, but this is all the time, and at everyone, and he makes it really obvious too! It’s not just a quick glance; it’s a flat outstare. We will be out in public, and I’ll try talking to him, and he doesn’t always respond. Then I’ve realized it’s because he’s not listened as he’s staring at someone. This isn’t me trying to be insecure, but I do find it disrespectful when we are out having a day for some “us time,” but he’s too focused on other people. I have brought this up with him, but I haven’t got anywhere with him. It’s got to the point where I don’t want to go into public with him anymore. He keeps saying we need a date night out for a meal, but I’ve said no, and I’ve said my reasons for this, but it just causes an argument. What is other people’s opinion on this?
Is he starting because he finds them attractive or because he likes people watching?
Ugh my husband is like this too then thinks it’s funny or says he was t gawking
Have you tried blinders? I mean, honestly the AUDACITY 
I wouldn’t be seen in public with him either, he’s an embarrassment. I don’t know about the rest of your relationship so I don’t know what you should do about that. But if he wants you to go out with him maybe he will start acting like a decent human being.
Did you get an explanation from him why he’s doing that? Has he been like that since you met him or just lately?
I can empathize, I often lose my husband to his cell phone.
While I personally don’t like it, glancing/admiring is one thing. Especially if done respectfully so people don’t know and feel bothered. It’s human nature (for most - definitely not all though, I won’t do it) to look.
But to go as far as you’re describing? At that point, yes, it’s disrespectful. It’s actively interrupting your time. That’s not okay. You’re his partner, you should come first and gawking shouldn’t be a thing let alone interfering like that.
Maybe because you two dont get out much he is seeing how other couples interact? We assume men dont have feelings or validate them enough to understand what’s going through there minds before assuming the worst. Maybe he is checking out women but the worst part of a relationship is assumption. Will drive you crazy. Dont ever assume or expect anything is key to a happy life in my eyes. Not saying everyone has to agree just my opinion.
I agree with you. It’s very disrespectful!
My ex used to do this, i used to say comments like, gee dont give yourself a neck injury… he would stare and then turn his neck right around … until one day…
there was this woman he used to constantly stare at while the kids were at swimming lessons… one day i was just very annoyed and he was staring at her the entire time and then walking to her car… we drove by her and he was doing it again… so i jammed the brakes on and yelled “why dont you go ask her for her number “ she turned around laughed at him and said no thanks i have a husband… he took off out of the car… like F U !!
*** he also was a serial cheater
Wow. The comments I’m reading on this thread are absurd. It sounds like he’s got some sensory issues going on. I understand this because I have them as well. My relationship is very healthy and happy because we don’t place our happiness or contentment on each other. That’s an inside job. We don’t have expectations because we realize that’s the quickest way to be let down. If you are so self absorbed that you expect him to change something he probably has no control over, then you need to set that man free because it’s devastating to be with someone that that can’t accept a person exactly how they are. Maybe look into therapy for co dependance. It may help you to understand why you’re trying to change your partner instead of yourself.
He’s just waking up and choosing violence.
Lol joking it sounds like he’s just observing his surroundings. Staying on guard …Was he former military?
Straight up embarrass him when y’all go out and call him out in front of everyone. I feel like that’s rude. Don’t parents teach that at a young age not to stare at people? I know I teach my children that.
Sounds like he may have sensory issues and possibly social anxiety. My hubby and I like to people watch sometimes too. But what she is describing sounds like he knows he is doing it but can’t help it…he could be on the spectrum. I’m getting myself tested this year.
He could have something medical maybe he dont like being outside and blinking out or staring but if he is doing it on purpose check it up with him problems dont get solved posting them here
I don’t get out of there house very often and i find being around lots of people very overstimulating and I zone out and watch people all the time. I don’t mean to, I just get lost watching everyone else existing around me.
One of my exes used to stare and comment … so disrespectful… I refused to even go out in the street with him coz he would make me feel so small … as I said he’s now a long ago ex.
Wtf, this is just plain weird! So disrespectful to you as his spouse and damn creepy for the folk he’s staring at. Probably gives them a complex! 
I agree with Sonya Hailey, tell him loudly to pack it in.
More to the point, why hasn’t anyone confronted him?!
I do this and in no way shape or form is it ogling or in a certain way… I zone out and I people watch. I like to sit in a corner in a room… i have anxiety. People saying be embarrassing etc are ignorant
He may have zoned out because your conversation is boring him, the rest of the world is way more interesting
I mean if I see a girl with a nice bum or just a pretty girl ill point it her out. I’m very insecure about myself but im not insecure about my relationship. I trust him. Looks are just looks. Its whatever to me. (And thats coming from a girl who’s been cheated on by her ex husband which he also got my best friend pregnant) the rest of the question. Im not sure. We need more like what did he say or do when you have brought it up. Do you bring it up while/after itz happening/happened? Maybe do it at home not I. Public if you haven’t that it others you that he checks out or stares at people. Is it all people? Or girls?
Mine used to turn around and look at the woman’s bum as he walked past lol.
It’s a man thing but a bit rude in front of you!!! Is he trying to make you jealous? Not sure of the answer to this one.
Mine does this all the time. I always yell at him. He’s just nosy haha. He says he likes to be aware of his surroundings. It’s not like other women in general. He stares at everyone! It’s embarrassing!
Well I do have another take on this, and let me know if this seems right. But he’s not listening as you’re speaking to him he could be zoning out not necessarily staring on purpose and he might not realize he’s doing it. Maybe have a discussion with him to take a video of him the next time he’s doing it so you can make him aware. I used to do this not staring at people but staring off into space and I found out I was having mini seizures.
It’s like whatever I was looking at before I spaced out I just locked on to and was unresponsive to outside stimuli.
He could be a serial killer … seeking out his next victim 
sorry I’ve watched too many horror films lately!
Maybe 
he is remedial? And doesn’t know he’s doing it. Not trying to be funny but he might be on the spectrum. Worth getting him checked out.
My Husband does the same thing. We are to the point we don’t even talk unless he’s complaining about something or talking about work other he’s always saying I don’t want him no more.
You’ve brought it up, but has he recognized or acknowledged the behavior? Is it people he finds attractive, or anyone really? He may be having a medical/ psychological issue.
Otherwise, if he is fully aware and doesn’t care to stop, maybe try some couples counseling if you’re both willing. Or just go your separate ways if he’s genuinely not that interested in you.
Well I do the same, it’s just habit. I would look at people speaking, how they move their hands, watch their body language etc. I’m never too obvious though. His just nosey and easily distracted.
If he’s doing it blatantly gawking at other woman in front of you. Yes that would be a huge issue for me.
Sounds to me like it could be along the lines of anxiety or adhd. Do your research and see if you feel it encompasses other things he does. Also has he ever been diagnosed with either? Be understanding of it since it’s a constant thing, don’t be hateful. I do similar things, also when I’m out with friends and talking to them I’ll hold entire conversations and not look at them once, just be focused on what’s around me. I can’t help it. Try to be open minded as there may be an underlying concern rather than him ‘being rude’
This separates the boys from the men. They look ridiculous ogling everything remotely female like a salivating dog.
Grown evolved men don’t do it. At least not to any degree it’s an issue.
He WILL NEVER CHANGE. IF HES DOING THAT WITH YOU
…WHATS HE DOING BEHIND YOUR BACK 
. HE WILL ALWAYS HAVE A DUMB EXCUSE. ITS NOT YOU:heart: ITS ONLY GOING TO RUIN YOU N MAKE U MISERABLE. TRY TO GET OUT NOW…
Yeah then tell her the marriage is over cuz she never wants to do anything and the other woman he met does
My husband “people watches” as he calls it🤣 he’s just nosy and had a very sheltered childhood. He just likes to see everything going on
Do it to him, make a point of it, like mid sentences stop and turn to follow where someone’s walking …?
Mine had children call him out… mom why is that man staring at you. Hated going out with him
Sorry, but this doesn’t sound absurd to you, in order to stop your S/O from disrespecting you out in public, is to just punish him by not going out in public with him. Punishing yourself too, cause you can’t date your partner. All so you’ll stay inside where he can’t look at people. Yup, sounds like the relationship any person would want 
. Now if by people, not sure if you mean every sex, every person or just women? But, I am assuming it did not just start after the I do’s… so now what you spend your life locked in the house with him? This is why you don’t settle, put up with something that doesn’t sit right with you… you don’t settle. Cause the years will go by & it will still bug you, just cause you love them, just because other than… they are a good guy. Youre not just trying to survive a road trip, couple, weeks with… you’re planning for a lifetime, settling for a lifetime, putting up with for a lifetime
Is this a situation where its about intimidation?
Or is he super awkward in social situations?
What is his point in staring?
Who is he staring at most?
Your husband sounds like the creepy guy that all women hate. If he can’t get himself together he should stay inside
There’s no medical condition, it’s disrespectful.
Soo sorry you’re going through this 
maybe some marriage counseling? I hope you find a solution hun! Good luck 
I am the mother to a child,(11), who does this constantly. …
Is it creepy…yup.
Is it challenging to overcome…yup.
Do I care for/respect him any less…nope.
He has extreme social anxiety and sensory processing disorder. He’s literally just trying to figure out things around him. All other senses are in over drive so he stares extra hard
To any unknown person, it looks horrible.
Disrespectful… Check out guys in front of him. See how he likes it
To me it sounds like anxiety, I have extreme anxiety and when I’m out I’m always watching people and like to be aware of my surroundings…or…he could just be a people watcher…a lot of times people that do this zone totally out…they don’t know why they do it…and it’s hard to control
Sounds like he might have social anxiety
It could be an anexity thing, being out in public n he may not realise he is doing it. My husband use to be like this, that was b4 we were married n it was mainly because he not a social person. But for him he would stare at other people as a way to stop them watching him. That’s how his mind seen it anyway.
I people watch. I check out both men and women. Heck, sometimes we check everyone out together! Lol but it does sound like he has anxiety going on when he’s not responding x
Be brave and call him out really loud in front of anyone he is staring at. Maybe a few times getting a little nervous he will control.
Men or women don’t need to gawk at others it is just disrespectful.
Or you can try doing it yourself.
This does my head in
Maybe he’s in awe of the fuckery around him…or maybe whatever you’re talking about isn’t as interesting. Go spend a few hundred dollars and tell him you spoke with him about it and he said it was a great idea but he must have been staring into space 
.
It’s rude and creepy. Period
You are unhappy - get yourself another Beau…
My husband does this, but he’s former military. He always knows all exits out just in case
Could be absence seizures. Sleep apnea is a possibility.
If it hurts you and he knows it hurts you but keep doing it it’s very disrespectful. Would he be ok if he was talking to you and you ignored him and walked off ? Probably not. But sometimes maybe that’s what have to happen . Let him taste his own medicine
A lot of people on here can’t read properly…she clearly stated that he stares at EVERYONE…not just women
Is it women he’s ogling or is it just people in general ?
Go out and do the same thing he does …
Oh, My ex-husband used to do this, we would go out for some “us” time and I’d be talking to him and tryna enjoy the day and the ENTIRE time he would be zoned out STARING at any and every female that would go by to the point they would be looking at him like he was mf crazy, the shit was embarrassing to me cuz it was Iike I wasn’t even there smdh it got to the point I just stopped going out with him and it’s one of the many reasons I divorced him, he was just more interested in any and everybody but me…
My partner is like this im so tired of not being able to go anywhere with him because he just can’t respect me im really considering leaving him at this point. I want to be able to go places and have fun.
My neice would stare out in space and blank out when she was having seizures in High School when she was in her twenties they discovered a tumor the size of a fist on her brain 
. She had to have brain surgery to remove it . So before jumping to conclusions have him checked out medically.
I’m hyper aware and suffer anxiety and paranoia I look at and analyse everything around me all the time
It’s disrespectful and childish and creepy af. Tell him to keep his eyes to himself and act right. Tell him his behavior is unbecoming and that is why you do not want to go out w him. Tell him he ignores you to stare at others and not only is it disrespectful but in very poor taste.
Shouldn’t his attention be on you during date night? Period.
Yes it is disrespectful and causes insecurities, there’s a fine line between normal behaviour and disrespectful behaviour I don’t do it because I wouldn’t want my partner to feel insignificant enough that their feelings aren’t a priority… plus we’re all grown enough to know the difference between someone looking at us to someone sleazily looking at us 
Yeah… so glad I am no longer married. So sorry this is happening. It’s horrible to feel the way you do and not feel heard when you bring it up.
This might sound weird, but there’s something called the psychopath stare. Look into it and see if that’s what it is 
I watch body language experts on YouTube and I’ve heard them mention this more than once. That the first reed flag will be a guy who looks at you in the room, and doesn’t break contact. They don’t realize it’s not normal.
If he’s not acting on it don’t trip on it , I people watch constantly I also check women out too it’s natural
Boys are dumb, it’s rude to stare, so many reasons I can’t name em all on here
If youve ever tols your partner thT something bothers u, and they just shrug it off, then thats your sign, they don’t deserve u
Ask him why he’s staring. Is he checking them out or is it just a blank daydream stare?
Hes an observer…many people are like this
And it causes an argument because it’s just silly
We both do this lol and comment loudly
Do it to him girl honestly see his reaction then when he brings it up say oh I thought this what we be doing now my bad … see if he stops… he needs to taste his medicine, play his silly game make it obvious , it won’t last long , then put it too him it stops or you out honestly don’t put up with that… no woman likes that shyt or call him out that’s always fun , i had this once haha a guy I dated was in my car was staring at a chick walking even turned to look back I said gosh that was a stare he’s like I know her I was like what’s her name he said Katie I was like oh OK then I turned the car around started yelling out her name no response he’s hiding in front seat I was like Katie stop ignoring me my bf says he knows you he asked me to turn around car to say hi at this point my bf tells me he’s full of shyt doesn’t know her Katie’s not even her name obviously yeah you know it I drove off … dickhead he never did it to me again haha 
Tell him to put his mufuckin eyes back in his head. I would but im an ass 🤷🏼♂ men are so ridiculous.
He’s on meth and paranoid lol
Hey couples counseling let someone qualified mediate
My husband said that I have been looking at people to but I am a very distracted person. If I am looking just know what I am looking at and what goes on in my head is 2 different things, meaning my brain is either empty, singing songs or stressing. I really dont think looking is a problem once the person dont show intent.
Mine does the same thing. Ends up making me insecure. Seems he stares at everyone but I obviously notice it more when it’s a beautiful woman
Some people commenting obviously don’t know about anxiety or adhd…people like myself with both of these…we zone out and with anxiety we like to be aware of everything going on around us at all time and we have no control over it…the o/p also said he does it to PEOPLE not just women
I just keep walking and have him get lost / he will call me asking where am I ,but I don’t answer until I’m done and ready to go / it makes him mad lol well that’s what he gets for want to be nosey on other people and ignored me 
My ex used to literally take off across wherever we were to check out other women. Overall, that plus other things ended the relationship. I think it’s HIGHLY DISRESPECTFUL. He became such an embarrassment that I no longer allowed him in public with me. . If he can’t keep his eyes to himself and on his own lady, there’s probably a problem.
I just think that’s weird, I’m assuming he’s staring at everyone and by everyone I mean he’s not perving on chicks only. I tend to stare at people if I’m by myself and sitting down in public but I wouldn’t do it when I’m in the company of people.
Looking doesn’t matter , looking when he’s with you doesnt matter . If he dudnt want to be with you he wouldn’t just look. Turn it on him and start looking at all the fit guys ! 80)
Girrrrl. Steve Harvey said that men are always looking for… Idk how to word it …the best in their eyes. That they could be in a relationship and if theyre still looking that means they think you arent the one potentially wanting to swap you out for someone else
The question is…who is “other people”? You not very specific. I would be mad as hell if it’s other women
Maybe stand a few feet away and record him. Then show him how creepy he looks. Just an idea. Ugh I’m sorry though, that has to be so uncomfortable.
Is he neurodivergent ? And undiagnosed? When you say everyone is it men and woman or just woman? Is it a sexual thing or is he a people watcher? What was his answer when you asked him why he does it?
My Ex husband started pulling that crap after year 15 of marriage. Two can play that game. It got to where we took two cars to go to one function so I wouldn’t have to deal with his bad attitude once I confronted the situation. That is nothing more than RUDENESS and lack of respect. Year 16 I got a divorce. Never looked back either.
Is he staring at other women? If so, that is disrespectful. If he does it again, you stare at a guy. When your husband talks to you, ignore him for a second and then say “Sorry. I was distracted.” Give a little giggle. Then say “That guy over there stood up for a second and I saw the outline of his penis. OMG. That guy should be doing adult films! I’m sorry hun , what did you say?”
Its weird as hell. Wont go out with my husband if he does that😐
You should start staring too.When he asks you a question purposely ignore him.Do it a few times.It will definitely give him a better understanding of what it feels like…Sometimes you got to play the game to win it
If you’ve told him about it and how it makes you feels and he continues to do it, I’d call him out on it then and there loud enough for a few people to hear and embarrass his ass. “Hey, you wanna quit staring at (blah blah) and answer my question or continue to be a weirdo?” 
Bet he knocks it off real quick lbvs.
So he’s not just staring at other women, it’s “people” did you stop to think maybe he’s just “off with the fairies” I do this all the time, just stare off at people or things that are in the line of people, it’s nothing to be concerned about, but I’d probably seek medical advice if this is happening on a regular basis, I have epilepsy and have pettimal seizures which causes my brain to shut down for a few seconds, might not be but might be, I highly doubt he’s blatantly staring at other “people” on purpose
Suffered the same thing.
Always on the look out.
Staring and out of this world.
I got rid of him.
Don’t suffer anymore.
Any other advice I should give? Lol x
Let him know how creepy he looks staring at people 
he will soon stop
He’s a people watcher
It’s nothing. He’s just in deep thought about something they call it’s daytime stare is siesure I dkno
Start checking out other men… point out how nice their butts are… let him know how annoying it is