OK, I have been married to my husband for 21 years. I should never have married him; I was so distraught due to heartbreak, so we had an exciting, tumultuous dating phase when I got pregnant. I have a dysfunctional family growing up; I won’t get into that. I should have said no when he asked me to marry him, but I didn’t and put up with years of suspected cheating, confirmation of an inappropriate relationship cheating with a coworker, and a never-ending stream of crippling debt. I used stock I had to pay that debt, and I’m resentful of what that would have amounted to today. I was always very responsible with money and never had debt until I met him, and the stock I had to sell to pay the debt he accrued in both of our names would have a substantial value today. We almost split up after I found out about his work affair 15 plus years ago, but I stuck it out, and we had another child who has captured my heart, such a great kid. My kids are my world, and he is trying more these days, but I suddenly realize the resentment I have felt for so many years. He also can’t control his obsessions is fixated on craft beer and backwoods bands that are not my style. Not to mention he was diagnosed bipolar about 15 years ago and has obsessions with food. He will lose weight and gain weight (100 lbs up and down). Right now, he’s on-again weight phase (the top), and I feel horrible saying this, but it’s a total turnoff, and he’s not attractive to me, so we haven’t had sex in over a year. I bust my ass to try to be healthy; if he would at least try, it would be different. I am at a crossroads but keep fixating on the fact I feel he acts like he wants to be a bachelor, and I’m looking for a solid, stable partner who is happy with me. Right now, he is traveling back to the last state we lived in to go to a concert. I was born with lung deficiencies and a heart defect, so I’ve been trying to be careful with this pandemic. I was sad he would travel and go to a concert with the recent surge, but he told me he was going with some friends from our old neighborhood. I just found out tonight he stayed with the owner of a bar he met and some people he met at previous concerts in an Air B&B and not our neighborhood friends. He never mentioned these other people at all until tonight via text. I didn’t leave long ago because I was financially strapped, but I have the means now. I feel so lonely. Don’t I deserve happiness? Don’t I deserve someone who wants to just be with me and keep me safe? My kids are 20 and 15, so not much of an issue; they are pretty well adjusted. However, I’m also so sad they grew up in a household where I kept things in check and was pretty much unhappy. I want them to be happy and understand what a healthy relationship looks like. I had two longer-term relationships before him (5 and 3 years), so I know what a positive relationship looks like. Thanks for listening; I look forward to your suggestions. Have I completely ruined my life? Is it too late for me to be happy?
It’s never too late to be happy. Get out and find peace… you deserve it 
It’s never to late to make a change and be happy.
Sounds like you have your mind made up. Do what is good for you. Good luck
It’s NEVER too late to start over. Go find happiness !! At this stage, he will never improve, he will never change. I left a marriage after 13 years, married " my best friend" … we have been so happy !! Our wedding pictures are still on display after 22 years.
It’s never to late to start over. You deserve all the happiness this world can offer.
It sounds like you’ve made your mind up and are seeking validation. Only you know what is best for you.
It’s not too late you need to get away from him. It’s never too late to be happy in a new relationship or by yourself live is too short to live unhappy is doing a person no good it can effect your health.
Move out and start anew. Time served. Focus on you and what the second half of your life will be.
It’s never too late. If leaving would make you happy, then do so.
Go for it life is too short to be unhappy
Honey he’s like a haunted houses. GET OUT
If you have the means to live on your own, then leave and start over. You will be so much happier, and that will make your kids happy too. They may be older, but they need to see some happiness in their lives! I hope you find true love some day, someone who will love you and your kids, and think of you first instead of themselves. You deserve to be happy! Good luck! 
Your mental health will bring your physical health down…get out and allow yourself to be happy…your husband isn’t going to miss a beat…maybe your money is all
Stop beating yourself up.you are wasting your one and only precious life. Today is a new day,you can do a new thing. Start over,leave because you have to believe you deserve better.you don’t owe him anything.your kids will be ok,they want their mom to be happy,all kids do. Im praying for you.you can do anything.God bless you.
You’ve spent your time and you made your decision long ago. It’s time to go
It’s not too late, your kids will be happy when they see you happy 
As long as God breathes breath into you each day, it is never too late to be HAPPY! You deserve to have a life worth living that you are excited about! Life is too short to be miserable each day! Enjoy it!
Leave him, you will be more happy by yourself than with him. And it’s totally possible to find someone else.
Life is too short to not take the steps that will make you happy. Learn to do things that you like and enjoy and you’ll find your own company makes you less lonely. Once you are ok with your own company, your standards for the future will be higher because people will be competing with your comfort zone. When we are with people to prevent loneliness, we actually seem to end up lonelier. Go forth and find WHAT makes you happy, not who. 
Good luck!!!
It’s never too late.
Honey pack your hubby’s bags, get a court ordered eviction on him & file for divorce.
It appears he has all but made the steps to go his own way, however you & the children need the stability of keeping the home, & keeping it drama free.
You deserve the happiness it will bring. 
Follow your gut and heart 
Go and be happy, no sense in being bitter. Leave.
Follow your heart. You don’t need a facebook group to confirm what your feeling. The spark is gone and your kids are old enough to understand that you both love your kids but don’t love each other.
It is NEVER too late to be happy. Go and find your happiness and leave the past behind❤️
Never too late. You & kids deserve better.
Go see a lawyer while he is gone. Don’t let him back in
None of the turn-offs or resentment about paying his debts interests me, the fact that he once was unfaithful and you forgave and moved on and now he’s lying by omission about who he’s staying with, that interests me, you would do yourself a favor if you got tested for std’s and then took command of your situation
It is never too late to be happy. It will take time to heal but the peace you find is well worth starting over.
Go and be happy Mamma. You deserve it for sure. Your kids will be fine and totally want to you to find happiness x
Leave. You’ve already wasted too many years that you cant get back
I left after 30 years….it’s never too late!
It is better to be alone then in bad company.
It’s never too late. Go find yourself and eventually hopefully find love too
Go, just go! no more overthinking it. I waited 25 years and finally left and found a great partner, together 7 years and they have been among the best years of my life! There is someone out there for you, don’t keep him waiting while you dither!
It’s never too late and you already know what to do! Good luck to a happier future. 
With all you’ve said, why on earth would you stay? Is hubs on meds & in therapy/behavior modification for his bipolar?
People find new spouses into their 90s. You may not find a new man to your liking (or you might!), but you can be happy for the rest of your life. And get some therapy to figure out why you agreed to marry this dude, why you stayed, and why you had a second child with him. Don’t make the same mistake twice. Good luck, have fun, and be safe.
Go find happiness you deserve it!!
It’s never too late to find the happiness you are seeking. It’s clear you aren’t happy, it’s also clear he has lied to you and cheated. Don’t waste anymore of your time being in a marriage that has hit a dead end. Make plans to free yourself and take your kid’s with you! I wish you and them well.
NEVER too late to be happy
after my 23 yr relationship him admitting to cheating an other things …kicking his ass out was the best thing that could have happened … your huband is not honest and had done shitty things in the past , he hasnt changed … kick him to the curb… concentrate on you and your kids <3
If you don’t want to be with him then don’t
It’s never to late to be happy or find a new place in life
Where you feel like you belong
Go for it he doesn’t deserve you
It’s never to late to be happy. Time to concentrate on you
Sounds like you’ve already emotionally checked out. Once this has happened its time to move on. There’s too much betrayal and dishonesty on his behalf. I would go nuts with a man like him. And yes of course you can he happy. I was with my ex husband for 19 years. We just grew apart. Great man, just not for me. I’ve been with my partner now for almost 3 years and we have a 4 month old and im 40!
Move on and do you so you can be happy for the rest of your days. You deserve it
And don’t look back…
Why do you even need to ask this question…. RUN, don’t walk as fast as you can ! Enjoy the rest of your life !!
It’s NEVER too late to be happy.
Nope get out. As a child of a mother who went through similar things and she did a good job hiding a lot from us. But we would catch her crying at times so we knew she was unhappy and for the most part it was always my mom and sister and I a lot of the times. We would tell her she deserves to be happy… it took a lot for her to finally leave him but she is beyond happy now living her life. I say leave his ass don’t be afraid and never look back!!!
Sounds like you answered you own question. You deserve happiness.
It’s NEVER to late!!
KNOW YOUR WORTH!!!
But you have to let go of the PAST!.. You did choose to use your savings to bail out and forgave him or at least accepted it enough to move on from it…
Now it’s your time to move on again… alone this Time and SHINE Bright…
Don’t be resentful any longer as it gets us Nowhere… and you said yourself You got an amazing kids out of it so Look at it as you still WON!
Live long and prosper in peace away from his noise. Make your own happy noise in this short fleeting life! <3
It’s never too late. Do what’s best for your soul and happiness will follow. Good luck sister💗
It’s absolutely never too late to be happy, trust me
1st marriage, too young, so unhappy. I lost friends, family, never had money even though I worked, abuse, couldn’t do anything.
Finally divorced , the only good thing I got was my 2 boys
Fast forward to today- I’m 41 remarried to my soul mate , someone who supports me in everything . My old friends are back, I have independence, an awesome job and I’m about to do my nursing degree. I’m happier than ever . So it’s never too late
Hard to believe you’ve dealt with this for 21yrs! Why?? Kinda seems like you must have felt something for this man because doesn’t sound like you stayed for the children and if so dissatisfied why would you bring another child into a unhappy relationship? If so unhappy 
why are you still there? Leave! Take your children and go find what you’re wanting before life passes you by! Life is tooooo short to live it unhappy! Remember life isn’t always greener on the other side and sometimes the happiness you’re searching for is right there being overlooked because we are to mixed up with the pass to look at present! Hope and pray 
everything eventually works out and you fine what you’re searching for!
I think you know the answer to this
People are so conditioned to think that the end of any relationship is bad. It’s really just a new beginning.
Well, do you want him or not ? You say your disgusted with him but yet you complain about him not staying home with you??? Im just a little confused
You deserve happiness
If you’re not happy, then leave! You don’t owe him anything. 
Happiness come from within, and you deserve to be able to be happy.
Never too late.
It’s never too late to make ur life better… leave … start ur life for you… go be happy… life is way too short… ask urself raise… ur on ur death bed… u die tomorrow…would u be ok with where u are now and what u have had?? … if ur true answer is no… then change it … go be happy
Never too late to be happy!! But if you’re not happy now, things may never change. I’d say to leave
No it’s not too late. You do you take care of your kids and go live a life. Stay single for awhile don’t fall for someone too fast. I wouldn’t even worry about getting remarried anytime soon.
Why would you stay in any relationship unhappy? If your not happy you can’t make your husband or family happy. Never say never.
It’s never to late to be happy. The only person in this world that can make you happy is YOURSELF. Don’t expect that to come from someone else. You choose your path, you choose your choice and you are the only one responsible for your happiness. If your not happy only you can change that. Life is too short to be miserable
Never depend on some oneelse to make you happy.
Don’t jump right in again. Process everything carefully.
Start therapy and go from there.
Start a savings account in your name.
It’s never too late to be happy!! You’ll know when it’s time to go, but you gotta be willing to move your feet
Give it a shot to be happy! Hey, if you’re not, you can always re~unite……but I doubt you will 
Never allow anyone to steal your joy and happiness…ever!!! Learn to love yourself again and your life partner will find you!!!
Never too late, but I don’t think you want to be there. So leave
I left a similar situation five years ago after a 31 year marriage. I am single, have no interest in dating, and I’m happy being alone. I felt more alone when I was married than I do now. It’s never too late for happiness and I, like you, should’ve left many years before.
You will know when you’ve had enough, will make the decision to leave and you will do it. Good luck!!
Time to leave and find happiness within yourself.
You have quite the list. Would you happier alone? Time to move on.
You should find happiness. You’ve been a caretaker and sacrificed your life enough. Speak with his family about his diagnosis and let them have him now
I am right there with you. Except 22 years of the same story! I’m getting out of it and you should too!
Go live your best life girl!! You only have this one as far as we know
It’s never ever too late mama. Never. Do what makes u happy n fuck what other ppl think. U gotta go. Stop wasting ur moments with someone that will never ever make u happy.
You always have the right to change your life and do something to make you happy, you get one life, live it to its fullest
Simple answer, it is never too late to move on and be happy.
Omg. You both need medical help. Run there now.
You do what you need to do for your own happiness.
Sounds like you have been unhappy for a long time. Just leave!!