Is it selfish to be upset about my SO moving to the other room to sleep because our baby woke up crying at 3:30 AM and I couldn’t figure out why? He leaves for work around 6 AM but I just felt hurt when he woke up and left to the other room… I got baby back to sleep and now I feel sad
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I don’t think so. My husband gets up early for work, so I’ve always just took care of the babies at night. I personally never asked him to wake up and help.
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I think it’s straight wrong. I hate the “he has a job” theory. If he gave 2 sh*ts about your well being, he would help. Going to a completely different room, that’s nuts. My husband would never do that and we had 3.
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Mine gets up at 5:30 so he can take baby from me before he leaves for school drop off and work. I’m on maternity leave but that doesn’t mean I’m not entitled to at least an hour of uninterrupted sleep. Babe wakes up multiple times a night and I’m the one nursing her to sleep so… yeah I wouldn’t be ok with it. You both created that baby so you both should tend to them. It’s not like your “job” is any less demanding. Ladies, don’t settle for this type of man. The good ones are out there!
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If he has to work at 6 am then it’s understandable
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Everyone who says its fine… But a mom doesnt ever have a choice but to do it.
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There is not enough info here for y’all to be judging this man. Poor guy is gonna get home and have judgment thrown in his face with…See! The internet said!.. just no! 
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Of course he is, that’s his child too. My husband use to get up at 5 with baby then wake me up once he was done and leaving to work. That is still a child not even close to a real man, husband nor father.
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If he’s getting up early and doing a full days work then personally I’d be fine for him to sleep in next room, yh I get it your a mum and are home with kids and house needs to be done etc but I used to nap when baby was asleep in the day. He’s not going to get that option at work.
Unacceptable. You’re both parents. He should have been also trying to help you figure out why the baby was crying if he woke up, as is his responsibility as a parent too. Regardless of job, time, or whatever. You’re a post-partum mother. And take a hard look at the generational divide of the comments and opinions. That whole “he works” ideal is so outdated and gross. I’d be upset too. Parent have equal responsibilities to their child. And to eachother in the relationship. You’re a team or you’re losing.
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I would say there is a lot of context missing here and it really depends on the individual situation.
You obviously stated that he works at 6am. Are you currently working, on maternity leave or a SAHM? Does he do his share of his parenting and household responsibilities during the evenings and on weekends? What kind of job does he have? Does he work from home? Does he work in an office? Does he work a physically demanding job? Is this a regular occurrence?
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He needs his sleep so he can go to work. Maybe ask that he helps with baby when he’s off work while you take a good nap. Compromise is key.
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No he’s not selfish he has to be up at a certain time for work it’s completely understandable especially since you didn’t know why baby was crying we don’t know how long baby was crying for so if it was a little bit absolutely if I worked that early in morning I would leave the room to
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Yeah, this wouldn’t be okay with me. My husband is our SAHP so I’m the one who has to get up for work…and I’ve never once even considered (for more than a passing thought haha) abandoning him on a rough night. We do it together because then we can all get back to sleep quicker, and sleep is too valuable for both of us.
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My child’s father did this. My daughter would wake up and he would get mad, prep a bottle then go to the couch till the next morning.
He slept while I was up with the baby and then complained the next day about how tired he was.
He was unemployed btw. 
Needless to say, we didn’t work out.
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I think… It really depends on the circumstances… My husband moved into my sons room for a year after my twins were born. It was hard with the twins. I needed my space to do my thing. He did help out alot though during those first weeks. 
Idk… Why not just talk to your SO and hear what he says. Goodluck. 
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Your supposed to be a team, the first few weeks are the hardest. If he works all day you should be getting up. You can nap have a family member help you a couple hours so you can rest. He gets to work all day everyday.
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Dang right you are being selfish and inconsiderate.
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My husband would get up with me and the baby. He would make the formula while I changed our son then I would feed him. He would work at 6am also. We did this every single night together
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If it’s a constant thing. Like every time the baby wakes up and isn’t instantly settled if he’s not helping out even over weekends that’s a problem. If he just couldnt this morning and it’s a one off or a rare thing then I don’t see it as a big deal
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My husband helped me so much! I was a single mom with my oldest son. I was always so tired. With my husband now, he helped when we had a son. He works from home. I would go to bed at 10pm and he would come to bed at 3am since he is a night owl. My baby would eat at 5am so I got a good amount of sleep. We both did
I did this babies at night especially when I wasn’t working.
I always woke up with my babies at night and if my husband went in a different room I didn’t get upset. He works his butt off six days a week providing the roof over our heads.
I think it’s selfish that because we have the title mom that means we have to do everything. Even if we stay home and they work it’s their child they helped make too. Mine works the night shift but he still helps when he gets home he sleeps a few hours and helps with the baby and makes dinner when he gets up. And then we both alternate taking care of him until he leaves for work at night. On his 2 days off he helps during the night getting up to make a bottle etc since I do it all the other nights he isn’t home. It’s about being a team and not one person does this because I’m doing this. He may have to leave at 6am but when is he actually going to bed that he can’t give up an hour or so to help with the baby? Our baby has been fussy to the point he’s gone to work on maybe 3 hrs of sleep for staying up to help me.
You’re absolutely entitled to your feelings. My question is have you discussed this with him , before running to Facebook for answers and advice? Communication is key, I would talk to your partner.
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Same. Mine has to wake up early for work but he does offer to help when he is awake I’m the mornings if I need it. But I try to be understanding because he does work.
I take care of my kids solely at night. But he doesn’t leave the room he just sleeps through it 
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My baby is 8 months and since he’s been born thr is a lot of nights where I’m on the couch or he is. Him getting upset tho that’s kind of annoying he shouldn’t be getting mad about the baby waking up that’s his baby to
You both made that child. I’m a sahm I take care of 4 kids, 3 in school 1 still at home during the day. My bf works between 8,12,and 16 hr shifts and does night duty every night. Then we both work as a team when we are both home together. It’s been that way from day 1. Unless we have sick kiddos then we double team. Me on day shift and him on night shift has always worked.
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I dont think its selfish at all. When my babies were small when they woke up in the middle of the night I took them out of the room until they fell back asleep.
So the person with a job needs to suffer ? Come on now
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Well if he has work at 6 am I think it’s fine for him to go and get some sleep on the couch
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Funny how it’s always the men who think they have some form of higher entitlement to ignore their parental responsibilities because of a “job”.
The industrial age has really given men the go ahead to be losers. Long as their “bringing money into the house their job is done” lmfao who seriously came up with that backwards ass mentality smh
Just let him go to the couch.i would sleep better anyway.
Let him help you love. 
Depends if you’re working too. If he’s just leaving you to deal with it and sleeping somewhere else when you both have work in the morning, that’s lame.
More space in the bed for you to sprawl out…
… Get over it…Don’t make HIS issue YOUR issue…I dont know why u feel “sad”.Your child needed you n u did what what was best. PLAIN N SIMPLE.
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Disappointed in how fathers get a choice. Mothers do not get that luxury.
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Prayers for your husband Amene
Here’s how we solved it: when I was home on maternity leave (6 weeks), I did the nighttime changes/feeding. I slept when baby would nap. When I went back to (office) work, we’d alternate getting up at night. One of us would do daycare drop-off, the other would do pick-up. Saturday mornings he’d let me sleep in while he took the baby/ies, Sundays I’d take the kids to church and Sunday School so he could sleep.
There’s no right or wrong answer here. While I wouldn’t care if my husband left our room that does NOT invalidate how you feel. Everyone is different. You should talk to your husband and see if you guys can come to an agreement or understanding of what you both want/need. Communication is key. Also the beginning days with a new baby is very hard. Be kind and patient with each other 
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I was a stay at home mom and my husband didn’t get up with our daughter in the middle of the night. He worked 10 hour days 6 days a week and needed his sleep. On the weekends or after work he would take care of her so I could take a nap, and I was thankful for that. He’s now a truck driver and if we had another baby there’s definitely no way I would want him getting up in the middle of the night. A tired truck driver on the road can be dangerous.
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I let my husband sleep all night & once 5am hits he’s up and taking care are new born and toddler with no complaints just talk to your husband about how you feel pretty sure he will understand
Always had help from my husband with our children and he worked 12hrs shifts days and nights
I use to leave to the other room when our daughter woke up and my partner at the time use to work early hours like that. I get how your feeling but would he still do this if he wasn’t working early hours? My ex would still help on days he’s was more able too and didn’t have to be up at 4am.
With all 3 of ours - my husband got up and did nappy changes during the night… and went straight back to sleep (you’re looking 5-10 mins max) while I fed, got baby back to sleep and settled… it would also take me a while to drop back off. Then when they woke up in the morning (our son use to wake at 5am) he would get up with them, so I could try and get at least a couple hours solid, unbroken sleep.
do you work?
if not.
let him sleep.
Well, he needs to sleep before he goes to work.
I mean I had an ex who did this… and my current partner helps with my daughter all night long despite he has to be up at 2am for work… I wouldn’t say either is really wrong or selfish (unless he’s not picking up slack at all- say after work either)… it’s just whatever dynamic you guys feel is best for you (and agree on together, not him just leaving in the middle of you needing help- job or not the baby is his too).
I’d personally talk to him, express how you feel (your feelings are always valid no matter how insane they seem), and see if you guys can come up with a compromise because those late night cries don’t end for a longgg time. Lol. My daughter is almost 3 and I still have to deal with them from time to time so you definitely want some type of fair and agreed upon arrangement between you two so your parenting style flows well for years to come 