My 15 year old does not belong to either me or my husband biologically but we are his legal guardians. It has been that way since he was 18 months old. Anyways, his biological father pays $80 a month for child support. I am very strict as to what that money is used for. It pays for his playstation subscription, buys his hygiene products, gas if we wants me to take him places to hang out with his friends, ect. It’s not very much at All. All of my kids were getting $15 a week for an allowance. We have three kids. Y’all do the math. My husband and I are both out of work right now so we don’t have the extra money to pay them their allowance but we have told them as soon as we start working again, they will get their allowance back. My 15 year old has now thrown a giant fit because we have not agreed to pay him his allowance out of the little child support money we get. He says that him doing his chores free of pay is illegal and child slavery. I would really like some advice or opinions. What should I do? What would y’all do?
So let me get this straight, he “doesn belong to your or your husband” yet you’ve had him for 15 years? Imagine how he’d feel hearing you say that. If your other children are getting allowance SO SHOULD HE. he should be treated as an equal. I can’t imagine how he feels, just from this post you showed that he “isnt yours” and doesn’t recieve the same treatment, and trust me, he notices. Do better. Also, charging a 15 year old for gas? You charge your other kids as well right?? Oh, no? Hmm. Maybe put yourself in his shoes and see how this post would make you feel if you were him. Again, do better.
Imagine making a minor pay for all of their own stuff because they’re not biologically yours. This is disgusting and you’re awful for this. Give the child his $80 and he can choose what he does with it. Also , I wouldn’t be doing shit around the house for you if you treated me this way. Do it yourself.
When I was growing up I hadta buy my own hygiene products and was only allowed to spend 20.00 a month and not a penny more. Wasn’t charged for gas or anything like that and I didn’t get an allowance and had a job at 14 and my paychecks was put into a savings account because when it was time to buy school clothes I bought my own with my own money. He can get a job at McDonald’s and that will teach him responsibilities and put his money into savings for him that way he has something to show for his hard work.
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My 15-year-old got upset we do not have money for his allowance: Advice?
Explain the cost of him living in your home. Actually explain it to all your kids.
I believe 15 is old enough to get a job. 
. Just saying.
If all of the other kids biological or not are getting an allowance then he gets one too! If you cannot afford allowance then they all get cut off
His allowance goes to playstation subscription. He can choose the cash or the subscription
Tell him if that’s the case the cleaning cooking washing up and laundry also are going to be chargeable from now on if he feels it’s slavery 
I personally don’t do allowances for chores because when they get older they won’t get paid for doing their laundry, dishes, making their bed, and cleaning their room and etc. You can tell your child when they get older and on their own that they won’t get paid for those things they do for themselves anyways. Just my thoughts on it.
Our town has a community center and starts teenagers working at 14! I say he is old enough to start working a job!
Lmao let him get a real job 
allowance is a privilege and he doesn’t sound like he deserves it. At 15 I worked a real job and bought my stuff with my own money… including school clothes/supplies/phone/ect…- best way to learn the value of a dollar!
I’d sit down, write down, and show them all the bills and the costs. I’d then add the costs of taking care of children and their costs. I’d then explain the income coming in right now. If they can’t or don’t want to understand then tell them to get a job and learn how much work it puts in to making the money, how much uncle Sam takes, etc.
What an ungrateful child, honestly I would tell him everyone contributes to the household, y’all choosing to pay him is a choice, a choice that isn’t an option right now, I’d explain to them as long as someone lives there, their contribution is a must, also I’d have him choose between that subscription or the money, plus he’s old enough to work
Stop paying the Playstation subscription etc and tell him here your allowance but here the things your gonna have to use your allowance to pay for they are a privilege not a necessity and we do not have to provide them. Teaches him financial responsibility and teaches him to appreciate what was being done for him before.
Wow you use that money for gas to take this child places he is 15. He should not be paying for gas until he is driving. Maybe you should give him that money you use for gas.
Ugh! I’m sorry this is an issue in your home, currently. He needs a “come to Jesus moment”!!! Sit him down and show him the numbers! Everyone in your home works to keep it going!
I stopped after reading my 15 year old does not belong to either me or my husband biologically…
Sad
You take money from him for gas to take him to be with his friends???
Tell him you will make it up to him when you’re wkn. Gentle parenting/talking wkd great with mine anyway/better attitude. Be specific telling what it’s being spent on. Try to reason on his level. It’s important to him whether is reasonable / not
Tell him stop or he doesn’t get any allowance at all
This question always reminds me of that scene from “Everybody Hates Chris”
“I’m not givin’ you money for walkin’ around doin’ nothin’. An allowance? I allow you to sleep here at night. I allow you to eat them potatoes. I allow you to use my lights. I allow you to drink my Kool-Aid. I allow you to nibble on them green beans. I allow you to look at that TV. I allow you to run up my gas bill. I allow you to walk up my stairs. I allow you to ask me these ridiculous-ass questions. Why should I give you an allowance when I already paid for everything you do? Who you know that gets an allowance? Huh?”
Maybe he can get a job ? My daughter works at 15 at McDonald’s … a lot of fast food hires at 15 . Then he can work for his own money . My daughter enjoys having money now instead of getting $10 a week .
Spoilt 
We don’t do allowance at all. 
Sometimes if they want something specific we will give them tasks outside of their normal chores to earn money toward what they want.
They do chores because they live there and make it mess too. Not because they’ll get paid.
Lmao. I’d tell him to suck it up buttercup, and give him a quarter to call someone who cares about this so called child slavery.
He would be cutting the grass with scissors! Have him get a job with a workers permit.
First of all it was a privilege not a right to get an allowance. Chores is apart of being a family. He needs to reevaluate how selfish he is being. He is 15 almost summer tell him to get a job.
I had multiple daily chores both in the house and on the farm growing up and never had an allowance or even had money given to me at all. I did extra chores for money if I wanted to. I’m 28 now and my 3 kids definitely have daily chores and I’m still considering an allowance. they’re just not old enough to understand money yet. point is, he would have hateddddd to grow up with me
Tell him to go around and ask people if they need odd jobs done. Even if it’s taking out the trash for an elderly person for $5 is more then he’s making now.
This kid has a hard life ahead of him
Why did you make a point of saying “he is not a biological child”? 
Housework should be divided between everybody that lives in the home… help him do up some resumes, apply for paper routes, babysitting, easy repairs. My daughter wanted to make money so I brought her to a house cleaning job with me and she made 60$.
Do a budget night with all the kids old enough to do addition, don’t single him out other than explaining and showing how much his expenses come to. Suggest if he wants more spending money he can get a summer job mowing yards or something age apprioate
Ummm if the other kids are still getting allowance so should he
He’s 15 he can get a job.
At that point he’d of lost more than $15 for being a brat. It’s not like it’s just him not getting it. It’s all correct? Okay then they will have to deal. I’d of told him in advanced though and not his “payday.” So he can mentally prep. I know at that age hanging with friends is crucial so having no money would be torture. He’s almost old enough to get a part time job or teach him properly how to cut grass and he can go knock on doors.
Entitled brat… I’d stop it all and see what they think about that… I wonder why she’s singling this kid out… are the others ok with it?
I have four boys. They have chores Monday through Friday and don’t get an allowance. Why? Because you live in this house rent free and need to contribute some how 
Besides, they make most of the messes anyhow. So, what’s my point? Life isn’t fair. Doesn’t always go the way that you plan. He’s old enough to work. It’s not child abuse or slavery. Kids think they are so entitled these days.
Good luck!
What’s an allowance
Just sit down and talk with him. Explain finances and how chores aren’t a job to be paid for, chores exist for structure and to help the parents keep the house tidy. We all live as a family together so we all clean together. It’s not a job or work. I’d let him know that the allowance is a gift as well, it’s really none of his concern where the support goes because he’s a child. You can use it for house bills, utilities, food, home essentials, car payments, your gas, etc, since all of those things are in support of him. He needs all of those things to survive. Good luck!
I cut my kids off allowance a few years ago, they were getting lazy and greedy.
They do regular daily chores, it’s called life responsibilities.
He’s 15. Let him get a job. I was working at 15. Plus, if you had him since he was 18 months old he’s like a child to you wheather or not he’s biologically yours. If the other 3 are getting allowance, he should be too. Don’t just cut him off and give the other 3 allowance because they are biologically yours.
Your child is trying to control you. Tell him life is not always fair. That struggle is real and it’s better to learn that lesson now rather than when he’s grown.
Tell him to figure it out. Work for the neighbors, get a job. Tell him that’s called life.
Tell him he can have it all
But he can also chip in on %15 or rent, lights, water, cable, and phone. He will then owe you money. His work is part of the family if he does not want to be part of the family he can pay his portion of his living.
Typical teenager lol
He is ALLOWED to live there
Sit him down show him ALL bills. Money coming in and going out. This is a great age to start learning how to balance income.
15 years old is a rough age. The entitlement is high and they want to be adults when they are not. It’s not ridiculous that he has chores/responsibilities and has to understand that money is a bit too tight this month for allowance. 80$ is hardly anything when it comes to child support. You are doing what you can. He’s going to be mad and all you can do is try to explain. Teenagers are rough. I was like this with my parents and didn’t snap out of it until I had to get my own job and pay for my stuff at 18.
Treat him as an equal for a start !!!
Stop taking in children you can’t afford
I don’t believe in allowance…it’s called pitching in and being a team…I “allow” you to live in my house, I allow you to eat my food…I provide you with the necessities in life…that’s your allowance…if I have to pay u then ur going to have to start paying rent, utilities and food….oops, there goes your allowance 
Laugh at him lol no im kidding. That’s hard i guess hes just gona have to be mad for awhile he will realize eventually.
Not sure where you’re located , but 15 is old enough for a few jobs. He could also mow lawns , and do other work for people in your town to raise money. OR he could not have a PlayStation subscription! There is nothing illegal about this 
Do your other children pay for gas? The ones that BELONG to you?
First off chores are not child labor they are to teach responsibility
If he wants extra money tell him he’s 15 its time to start looking for a job, babysitting is a good way to start learning about work experience
I think if the other kids get an allowance it’s only fair that he does also.
Why not? Has he not been your son since he was 18months old? If you can’t give to one don’t give to any!
I would tell him when he starts paying rent I will pay him for doing his chores and that child support is meant to pay for the requirements to keep the child with a roof over his head food in his stomach and anything else required not for him to have money in his pocket if he wants the cash cancel his PlayStation account
Well, I would tell him that you doing his laundry, cooking his meals, cleaning his room, changing his sheets, doing the dishes he dirties, and that sort of thing could be constituted as slavery because he doesn’t pay you. But you do it anyway because you love him. He should be doing his chores for free because he’s a part of the household, he’s living there and contributing to the reason chores need to be done. Therefore, an allowance is gravy. If the money isn’t there for an allowance, then there’s no gravy.
My 15 year old son gathers & cuts wood with his two buddies. They make $150 a load and split it 3 ways. They feel great about it.
Tell him to get creative make some cash on the side
Darling,……if you don’t make that child get a job Nice parent or not, I had a job 3 weeks after I turned 15 and I’ve been working ever since. It gives you a great work ethic and teaches responsibility. Sounds to me like he needs a “tune up” as my dad calls it. A dose of responsibility would be very good for him. Let him mow lawns, pressure wash driveways, McDonald’s. Literally anything.
Gross. Why are you pointing out that he’s not biologically yours or your husband’s? Is he your child or not.
Also. How are both of you not working? How are you paying your bills? But no I don’t agree with his comments either.
Charge him his share of the utilities! Then tell him he can work off the difference!
Tell him to call the cops and try to make a report for abuse. I did that exact things when I was 15$ cops came and put me straight lol
Just because he’s not yours by blood doesn’t mean to treat him any different than your own kids. Be fair with the allowance/money. Do you charge the other kids gas money too?
Chores are part of being in a household. Allowance is nice, not required. I worked at an emergency kid shelter and our kids had to do chores (clean up after themselves basically and some helped staff like kitchen duty) bc they were part of a household.
I didn’t get any allowance growing up.
Why does anyone pay their child allowance? I was allowed to live there, Scott-free with minimal responsibilities for as long as I needed even after 18. Don’t pay your children to be responsible.
Illegal and child slavery 
child, please. What would I do? Explain that I didn’t get an allowance and that my mom would’ve laughed at me for asking for one. It’s a privilege that they’re able to get an allowance and sometimes things happen, like you being out of work, that make allowance impossible. I’d also probably consider showing him what real child slavery looks like because chores aren’t it. The child support is meant to support him, IE pay bills that provide a roof over his head, etc. He is not entitled to that money, as you are supporting him! If he can’t handle this change due to unforeseen circumstances, then I’d consider not reinstating allowance even when you are able to. Sorry if I sound harsh but allowance was never a thing in my house growing up and it won’t be a thing with my children either. We’ll give them money and buy stuff for them whenever but we aren’t going to have an allowance because I don’t want to deal with anything like this when we suddenly can’t afford to provide an allowance. He’s 15, so if you guys are comfortable with it, he could totally apply for jobs and make his own money.
The charging for gas thing is a bit much…. If you’re giving your biological children money for chores, than you need to give him money as well. That is only fair. I get $80 isn’t much a month, but you took in that baby at 18 months old. It’s your responsibility as well to care for him until he’s the age of 18 no matter what. When my kids turn 18 I won’t shut the door on them. Kids need their parents no matter how established they are.
I’d tell him when he’s 18 he can decide what money goes to what. None of mine got an allowance. If he doesn’t get one the rest shouldn’t. It should be fair all around.
My children did their chores for free or not really free… I worked and supported them. Chores are about responsibility. Are your other children mad about it??
I don’t pay my children allowance… they live here too and are very much capable of helping out and doing their part in keeping OUR home clean… they are well taken care of and need for nothing…
After reading this post I feel for that child! You being his legal guardians means you have 4 children! Should be the same for all! Why make him feel even more singled out?
He better be glad he didn’t grow up with my momma
Lmao tough shit? He gets to live there. Regardless if he’s working for it or not… congratulations you have a place to live with clothes on your back and food in your stomach.
This is so sad. He doesn’t ‘belong to you or your husband’. Imagine him reading this 
give him the money you use as gas money to take him to friends places, I think it’s ridiculous you make child support pay for that.
In some states 15 yo can work a certain amount of hours so let him get a job and figure out how to budget gas and stuff to get there.
First off you’re paying them to be part of a family. Didn’t you think they’d always expect it?
He should be doing chores regardless of an allowance. The only allowance as a kid I was ever given was when we did yard work
Tell him since he wants to act that way he doesn’t get an allowance anymore…
Get him working papers from school and have him go job hunting
take allowance away all together if he gonna act like that. allowance is a privilege. its not REQUIRED 
He’s old enough to get a summer job. But I wouldn’t be charging him for gas that’s a bit much. He’s not old enough to drive. I have a 18 and 14 year old. My 18 has a job so he don’t get an allowance he pays me $100 a month his choice he suggested it. My 14 year old has chores and he gets $20 a week.
You’re feeding him and giving him a place to live. All of the children should have chores. It is summer, he could start a lawn care business, maybe with his siblings. If he’s been with you that long, he should be one of your children, and all treated as one family.
If the biological kids are all getting allowance he should too! That’s BS!
Do you make your biological kids pay you for gas out if their allowance? Do they use his xBox or pay for their subscription out of their allowance?
Is he or isn’t he a part of the family?
I was 15 when I started working. Have your kid go get working papers and find an after school job if he wants the money so bad
Get a job. Y’all have kids. Dang.
It sounds like you make sure he knows he does not belong to your family.
Illegal… ha ha ha you are teaching him life skills. As adults no one pays us for chores. I hate the concept of allowances for chores.
As his parent it is your job to provide for his needs. If that comes out of support that is fine. If you give the other kids allowance, then he should get one as well. If allowance needs to be stopped, then yes, it stops for all. At 15yrs my son wanted more $$$ than I was willing to give & he got a parttime job (saved all summer too). Tell him to step it up himself… Life isnt a free ride! Sooner he learns, the more he will respect the value of a dollar.
Compromise. Playstation subscription or $15 week allowance.
My kids (13-18) don’t get an allowance for chores. My 18 year old has had a job since he was 15. When he got a job I told him he no linger has to do chores. Just do his own laundry and keep his room clean. Child support is used for laundry soap, hygiene, school funds and their phone bills. Their job $$ is used for whatever he wants. Tell him to get a job. I told my kids I had to do chores without an allowance and now they have to now.
Its technically not even allowance if its his own money… so you give your 3 bio kids 15 a week from your money but he gets the 15 OF HIS OWN money taken No Bueno
Tell him you’ll just start charging rent then. You pay utilities and the roof over his head. He could be babysitting or yard work around the neighborhood to earn money if he needs it that bad.
Be fair with all the children…idc who’s kids they are. They see you and calling you out
Wait uh min… you charge your 15 year old gas money to take him to hang out with his friends 
No. Thats fine. Stop paying his subscription then. He gets his $15 wages and can use that for his extra video game stuff
He is old enough to get a part time job. Also, It might be better for him to get minimum wage- it’s usually less than kids are expecting from their parents. Plus, they will have to work for a real boss that won’t put up with their shit when they don’t do it
I have grown children, my youngest just turned 18. None of my children ever got an allowance. We(the family) were a team, and every team member had their own responsibilities for our team to function smoothly. If one didn’t do their chores everyone knew who it was.