My 17-year-old child keeps asking about the stimulus money. And how she wants me to hand it to her so she can buy things she wants. And I’m talking about shoes. Ps4 games. Makeup. Now I’m on a “paycheck to paycheck” living right now. She has clothes she doesn’t wear in her closet. Some still have tags. Shoe she bought from her part-time job. And some she’s never worn. Her pop figure collection. She just spends her money on unnecessary things. I’ve bought her a piano, drum set, laptop, and she doesn’t touch her instruments that I paid for her to use and learn to play, which she asked for. I do put money away for her to save from her part-time job in a separate bank account. So she has money saved. And then she has money to spend on fun. Now, since she’s started working, she doesn’t do much around the house. Barely helps with chores. Id tells her she needs to do dishes or sweep up and mop the floors to help out around the house. She says ok, and then locks herself in her room. School, work, and then come home to sleep until 7 pm. To play video games until 10 pm then to sleep until 7 am the next day. I tell her I’m taking out her tv, and she’ll do dishes or clean the bathroom for about 2 or 3 days. Then back to doing nothing. She says she’s tired from working. Which, yes, I understand, but she understood that chores aren’t canceled until you move out. Even if you are working, we all participate in the house. So, the stimulus check is literally being saved and put in the bank because I spent my savings trying to survive during the pandemic last year. So I’m starting to save up again. Until now, she thinks I haven’t received it, and I’m waiting for it. Her co-workers, who are all older, told her that everyone is getting a stimulus check and she should be allowed to get one. Again. I’m not rich. I was literally homeless sleeping on a friend’s couch last year. We are finally on our feet. She is working again. And the stimulus is helping us pay bills off and catching up on things. Even paying for food because my house does not qualify for food stamps. I’m not selfish… I’m saving the money. I touched $291 today for groceries. i just want to save it for emergencies or whatever it may be… As easy as some will say, “just tell her,” how do I just tell her that she won’t get it??? I feel if she helped around the house, id reward her with a part of it. But she doesn’t do anything. I don’t ask her for money to go toward the bills. She just has to pay her phone—no bashing or shaming my parenting, please. Suggestions would be nice. Thanks.
Oh wow. Yeah explain to her what the stimulus even is. Keep on keepin mama, I know it’s tough but you are doing the right thing by saving money for her
Just tell her that the stimulus is for you, not her. It is meant to help you with the expenses of keeping a roof over her head, the lights on and food on the table. She’s not going to get it and furthermore, since she’s not pulling her weight around the house, she can cover her own expenses from her earnings for anything above the basics you provide. She needs to learn responsibility and that actions have consequences. Adulthood is going to be a huge shock if she doesn’t.