My 17-year-old has been taking too long in the bathroom: Advice?

My 17 year old son is driving me crazy with the amount of time he’s in the bathroom. We are a family of 5 and I am pregnant, but there’s only 1 bathroom. My son sits on the toilet for up to 45 minutes while playing on his phone, which creates a huge line outside the bathroom. I nearly peed my pants this morning waiting after we told him to hurry many times. He made things worse by getting into the shower without telling anyone after he was done on the toilet. We eventually went in, his privacy be damned. Shower curtain was closed anyways. Three of us needed to go! Hubby and I are fed up so we told him that he can no longer take his phone into the bathroom with him. He’s pissed off at us and refuses to recognize that his bathroom habits are quite selfish. Hubby has been talking about charging him rent once he’s 18 because we both don’t think he’d manage to afford an apartment alone but any room mates he could get would probably kick him out due to this and many other bad habits he has. How do I get him to realize he needs to be more considerate of others?

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My 17-year-old has been taking too long in the bathroom: Advice? - Mamas Uncut

Instead of having another kid you should’ve installed another bathroom. Imagine 5 going on 6 people sharing one bathroom- thats not fair or sanitary to anyone

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Put a shocker on it! You have control of remote! 10 minute max!

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Ummmmm… I hate to break it to you but, At 17 he’s using that phone for other reasons than playing games on it in the bathroom. I’m assuming he has to share a room with his siblings as it is and has nowhere to take care of his “needs” but in the bathroom. Maybe try telling him he can only have long bathroom breaks at night.

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Take the door dwn I kno u said u had only 1 restroom but damn make his a$$ find out to move out n pay for his own place that way he could take as long as he does…

What does r.wnt have to do with this ? If he’s paying rent he can take however long he wants bc he’s paying rent

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Next time tell him you’ll pee in his bed if he doesn’t get out and do it

At that age hes gonna be a while. I would make a new rule, if u plan on being longer than 3 minutes make sure no one else has to go first. Growing up we were only a fam of 4 but one bathroom. Anytime we showered or were gonna be a while we had to ask if anyone needed it first

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I actually use to do the same but it was because that was the only private place I could bawl my eyes out, plus I had other bad issues going on in my life.

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No phones in the bathroom. If he doesn’t follow the rule , take the phone away for a day

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Only private place it sounds like. It’s only 45 minutes.

This is the reason we bought a home with 3 bathrooms lol. Boys have one, girls have one, and hubby and I have one. One bathroom is tough with a large family. At some point you all have to go and someone has to wait. I grew up in a one bathroom home…had to hold it quite a few times.

Good luck teens dont see things the way we do

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So he doesn’t feel targeted cause teens get moody that way. give everyone a time limit and maybe yourself gets a little longer? It saves hot water aswell
.maybe just say girls holding in pee can cause problems.

Yeah ummmm who wants to tell her :rofl:

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Surprise him by taking him to the doctor and announcing loudly in the waiting room that he spends 45min on the toilet and cant get up even when people are banging on the door. You’re worried about his bowels, :rofl:

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In our home there’s 6 of us with one bathroom, all boys except me lol. If any of us plan on being a while in the bathroom, we ask if anyone else needs to use it , then head on in. It’s a respect thing all around. Even big boys with “needs” should be considerate of other peoples time.

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Girl he is doing something that you don’t want to think about. Just keep extra body wash in there.

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Ha Ha Ha! you know why a 17 year old takes forever in the bathroom !

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Another year and he would be in his own place

Welcome to “manhood”. My husband takes a long time due to issues, your son may have issues as well. Good luck.
All of you that’s bashing her for having 1 bathroom need to husband, maybe they can afford their house and are smart enough to not live above their means.

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These things should be taught BEFORE they become teens :woman_shrugging:t3:

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We dont do electronics in the bathroom. The main reason was my 15 yr old son was taking pics and putting them online but also it has people in the bathroom too long. We have 3 bathrooms and it still can be a problem

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This sounds like a personal problem. Ans honestly it’s not his fault you have 1 bath for 5 people I’m sorry. As well as he’s becoming into his own. Probably shares a bedroom, so that’s his only privacy time. Like wake up and look at yourself please. And stop blaming him.

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Who pays for the phone?

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we are a family of four with 1 bathroom and yes- they do make houses like this and it is feasible… i grew up in a home with one bathroom as well. if he is doing somthing that he needs privacy for that long for- he can either do that when no one else needs the bathroom or he needs a laxative. toilet should take 5-10 min max. when people are in the shower-our bathroom door is unlocked and anyone needing to use the toilet simply announces that they are entering to do so. when the shower curtain is drawn no one can see in.

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Idc if he’s yanking it. If I have to go, I have to go

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My 17 year old is exactly the same!! :joy:

I understand where you’re coming from, but teenagers take awhile in the bathroom. I would give him a time limit in the mornings. Set a timer if you have to… and when it goes off, he gets out for the next person. And in the mornings, he doesn’t take his phone in. As for the rest of the day, he has to ask if anyone needs the bathroom before he goes in. Set a time limit for then too. He should only have extended time in the bathroom when everyone else is in bed.

When you find an answer share it with me,lol! My grandkids are scared of bathroom in the basement,monsters down there I guess hahaha. These aren’t toddlers, they are 12 and16. it ll be okay,dont sweat the small stuff.

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He wont realize anything, that comes with maturity. No phone in the bathroom is the answer.

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He is not sitting on the toilet. He is a 17 year old boy. Think.

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I have a big family too, I also grew up in foster care so I’m used to lots of people in small areas. He’s a person and a teen at that, it would be more beneficial to have a conversation with him about being considerate of others. He could very well be trying to poop and you’re readu to ground him for being constipated it literally sounds insane to punish a kid for being in the john too long. Maybe he is doing other things and that’s still normal and healthy. I have to assume he shares a room, just like my kids do. He’s entitled to privacy, but certainly not at the expense of everyone else needing to pee or brush their teeth, so maybe getting to the root of the issue so it can be solved (maybe he “showers” once everyone is asleep so he can take his time) or maybe he needs some freaking miralax :rofl:

New rule. No phones in the bathroom. Effective immediately.

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Take lock off the door. Warn him…when coming in.

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He’s not using the bathroom like you think he is :rofl: Just sit him down and explain you understand he has “needs” but he needs to be a bit considerate of others in the house and wait for everyone to use the restroom first then he can have it as long as he wants then.

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Tell him to choke the chicken in his bedroom the bathroom is for pee and poop

Get a potty chair that looks like a potty and pull that sucker up beside him if you have to go. It will get really awkward, and he will cut that shit out. Literally. :joy::sob:

You got to be kidding me?

Where is his Dad?. At our house, Dad was the one we deal with. Was yes or no. No in between.

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Tell me you irresponsibility procreate beyond your means without telling me you irresponsibly procreate beyond your means.

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It’s kinda late in the game to just now start teaching common respect.

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If this is the kind of issues you’re having with your 17 year old, consider yourself one of the luckiest mom’s out there.

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Are you going through extra conditioner?

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Tell him to take rag, lotion or whatever to his room.His dad knows what he’s doing he was that age

As a mom of 3 boys they NEED ALONE TIME :wink::wink::wink:

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What You Have Allowed Will Continue As Long As You Continue To Allow It…

I would probably spend as much time as I could in the bathroom too if I had parents that acted like you.

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Seriously :flushed: I can’t deal :rofl::rofl:

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Check his browser history when he comes out sis

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He is more than likely touching himself in the only private area of the house. Give everyone in the house a time limit for the bathroom when they go in. If they aren’t sick and can’t finish peeing/pooping in 10-15 mins they can wait and try again later and if they can’t shower and finish drying off/getting ready in 30-45 mins then they can wait until the entire rest of the house has had their bathroom time AND you need to enforce a rule where past a certain time in the shower as long as curtain in closed you can come pee.

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that parent group (with Cath Hakanson)

5 people in one house with one bathroom.

That’s on you and you alone.

Hes 17 and from the sounds of it, it can be assumed he has to share a bedroom. That’s the only place for privacy in that house.

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He made things worse by getting in the shower after using the restroom… really lady?

Normally people shit or if a man, they PLAY with them selfs, then get in the shower with out permission from parents :joy:

you banging on the door or reminding him, starts the clock over, your doing it to yourself. Give the boy privacy.

Yep I said that. :joy::woman_shrugging:

Quick solution: buy a camping porta potty. $30 or less! Bam 2 people can pee or play at the same time :kissing_heart: Goodluck!

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No phone in the bathroom is the perfect answer. He will be out of there in no time.

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My daughter is 9 and she is on the toilet for about an hour playing Roblox on my tablet… I spent at least an hour on the toilet every morning.

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When the boy mom thing goes south :joy:

Thank god I have two girls

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We are a family of 5 with 1 bathroom. If someone is going to be on the toilet awhile they ask if anyone needs to go first (if they are having stomach pains and don’t know how long they will be in there). If we are in the shower door stays unlocked and they poke their heads in and ask to go (just to make sure the person in the shower won’t be opening the curtain). We do relatively well with this unless someone is on the toilet a really long time which does happen time to time due to people having gi issues. I personally don’t see charging rent helping matters at all with this situation. Good luck!

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:joy: welcome to boys momma.

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He’s probably playing with himself and needs privacy. Does he have his own room with a lock?

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Put you a little box outside the bathroom on the wall, if someone goes in phone goes in the box. Make it a rule for everyone not just him, including yourself.
If he can’t follow the rules then swap his phone out with a flip phone (yes they still sale them). Even if you have to get him a little $40 pre paid phone the $40 may be worth your sanity.

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Give that boy a bottle of lotion, box of tissues and a grocery sack and send him to his room with his phone.

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No phone :iphone: in the bathroom - he will be out quickly

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I would walk in and stare at him and make him finish … I have no shame . Crap or get off the pot , That many and people in one house . Naw sis , I’d handle that embarrassment to him and all … but , that’s just me … my house my rules

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l get paid over $ 178 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $ 16819 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.

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He’s 17 and sounds like he shares a room I believe self pleasure may be involved in why he stays in there so long

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I ban phones in the toilet :joy: I also tell everyone to announce when they are going just in case anyone is to be bursting and problem solved in our house lol. I got fed up with the queue that I had no choice :joy: there’s 6 of us trying to get out the door for 8.15am

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Who’s gonna tell her?

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maybe you should have started in his earlier years about consideration

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I have the same issue with my 19 year old. It actually disgusts me that he uses his phone in the loo. I simply continue to bug him when he takes too long. Knocking on the door constantly. Lately he’s been better, he’ll ask me if I need to go before he heads in for his marathon toileting. That said, it is normal for kids to do this especially if they have siblings who annoy them. A timer is helpful as well. As for rent, absolutely!! Life isn’t free, he needs to learn you have to pay to survive.

Adoption it’s never too late

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Next time he has to go… Take your time

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U know what he in there doing… Welcome to the world of boy moms. Tell him he can’t take his phone in or cut the wifi off :joy: he will run outta there.

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They don’t out grow it. My husband sits in the bathroom every morning and every night for over an hour :joy:

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Don’t let him take his phone to the bathroom

Misty Lynn Hayes look at this crap :woman_facepalming:

Take phone off of him

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Take the door off the hinges and put a shower curtain up that you can open if he’s taking so long

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Phone isn’t allowed in the bathroom anymore. Problem solved

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Great first step, hope it helps! lol. But as a mother of sons… they don’t need a phone! Lol

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Put a lock on it. Everyone gets a code. Block his abd see how he likes pooping his pants.

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Does he have any privacy outside of the bathroom? Like his own bedroom?

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Quite naive lol give him a lock on his bedroom door will sort that right out lol

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Wait till you know he has to go…… then you go watch Netflix in there

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I mean, you can run in and sit your behind on the toilet when he’s heading in and make him wait an hour before he can use the toilet…

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They don’t out grow it I have 4 boys in the house 1 is my husband and they literally take 10 years to go to the bathroom :scream:

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Definitely don’t be letting him in their with a phone, but also tell him he gets 5 minutes to take a crap in the morning and 5-10 minutes in the shower. If he goes over that amount then turn the water either off completely from the main, or just turn the hot water off on the water tank

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You don’t think he’d manage to afford an apartment on his own but you’re talking about charging him rent to live under your roof and have a bit of privacy?
Shit maybe buy a new house lmao so y’all can have room!?!? What good does charging him rent do?
toxic LOL

Wow
This needs to be a problem ?
If that’s your biggest issue with a 17 year old then you are lucky

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Turn around and leave him alone.

Make Another Bathroom If You Can

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Either you can make a rule that there are no electronics in the bathroom or turn off the WiFi. Simple fixes…

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The phone is the problem. Lol

It’s simple, “Shit or get off the pot”. Also, charging rent is BS! I’m sure he’ll leave as soon as he can afford it. He can’t enjoy sharing 1 bathroom and a bedroom with a shit load of people, of which YOU created.

Why are you paying for a phone for your son? Having him not take the phone in there with him is at least a start.

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My brother use to do the same thing. My Dad finally took the lock off the door so my Dad could go in and tell him times up. There was one bathroom and six of us.

No phones in the bathroom simple. He will be in a hurry to get back out to his phone

HE IS A GUY…… problem solved

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Turn the tables on him. Treat him the same way and see how long it takes for him to smarten up.

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