My little one is 4 and she screams and cries alot when we are out. I’m always scared to take her anywhere because she will just start screaming. I tell her she needs to be quiet, I give her a snack, a toy but she’ll go back to yelling. If I say anything she get mad and starts crying. When does this end?!
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Quit giving her toys when she is screaming and crying! You’re rewarding her for bad behavior!
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Probably overstimulated. Look, sometimes I want to scream too. Whenever I go somewhere super busy, I panic. I get super hot, dizzy and my heart starts to race. I want to scream or cry, but I’m an adult so I know better.
Kids can get anxiety. I can’t believe some of you suggesting that she spank her kid 
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What do you mean? Like she starts screaming out of nowhere? Or she starts screaming when you tell her no to something? Did you ask her why she screams? Is she crying as well? I need more info.
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Never had this problem , sounds like she wants attention, or she just isn’t disciplined at all at home. If she continues , I wouldn’t take her anywhere , she’s well old enough to know it not acceptable behavior, unless you have never taught her this.
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My daddy had a cure for that
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She’s communicating something to you… You’re going to have to be more aware of wat it is. Does she need more choices when going out? A drink? Specific snacks? Is she tired? Overstimulated?
It doesn’t end until you teach her how to communicate what she needs so this can look like talking to her. Narrate what you’re doing throughout the day. Tell her things like “I need a drink and I need a snack. I’m tired(ECT)” she’ll pick it up eventually as long as you’re consistent and help meet whatever helps her feel better during outings.
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Maybe she gets sensory overload? Overstimulated.
We discovered it helped my daughter to listen to music with headphones 
. She was like a completely different child on our outings. And she still uses this method.
Try talking to her to see if you can figure out what’s triggering the behavior. And then find what works for her to keep her calm/balanced. Maybe a calming scent? Like a lavender (or other calming scent), essential oil dabbed on, or baby lotion?
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Sounds like she could be getting over stimulated which happens stores are loud lots of people my daughter is 3 and I got her noise canceling head phones amns let her pick them out and they help tremendously, sometimes she still gets overwhelmed and that’s when I’ll try to find a space with not a lot of people and I’ll hold her hands and tell her to just breathe deep breathes and try to relax and just show her that I’m there and understand it’s hard to try to figure out why there upset at young ages cause they’re still trying to learn to communicate but it’ll get easier just take time to see what triggers her to get upset in stores
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Don’t talk and just pick her out of the cart or whatever they are riding in and pack them in the car and go home. They don’t get treats or anything. I can’t tell you how many grocery carts I left. Eventually they figured out they don’t get anything when they act up. We don’t get to behave like that and get rewarded. Don’t yell, scream or spank. Speak quietly and calm. If they are throwing a fit and you have to carry them out don’t talk.
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Is she non-verbal? 4 year olds can already express if you ask them why they dislike being outside or being in public places. Maybe it was a movie that she saw that made her fear or dislike being out? Maybe she’s not comfortable being in certain places? Try letting her talk it out. Also, don’t feel stressed or angry when she’s acting up, some children’s tantrums are boosted when they feel you are tense. Maybe get her a pet so she’ll enjoy being with it, start with letting her walk it, maybe she’ll appreciate being outside slowly.
How about a spank and go home till she learns how to behave?
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She sounds hyperstimulated. Give her some gum to chew, a chewie to chew on, or have her suck on a straw. Also doing arm squeezes up her arm for a count of five and then back down for the rest of a count to ten will help. All of those create a chemical release in your brain that helps you calm down
Maybe some noise canceling headphones. Or music you can play off your phone (Bluetooth headphones)
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Maybe have her checked out by a dr. Maybe the noise or a lot of people are to much for her
Could be multiple things on why… Are they diagnosed or undiagnosed but need to be. Or just difficult …
Lights too bright, too many different noises, too many different people and places ,being easily over stimulated.
It can be exhausting and chaotic .
Are they still in a pram? . Or could you pop them in a trolley and Can you offer a blanket to cover them , maybe noise cancelling headphones , ipad to distract them from all the noises … Maybe sunnies as well if they like them … …
If they want to help maybe do up a social story with the shop you go to and add what you might be looking for. Help with the shopping , cut out things you need to shop for and they find the items in the shop you have on the paper. And pop them in trolley …
If nothing works, may be they need to be watched while you go…
Does she tell you why going out makes her unhappy or scared?
I’m so sad that people feel every behavior a child exhibits requires a diagnosis. Boys spreading their arms and being airplanes are medicated as hyper. Girls who don’t like to be in noisy busy places have anxiety. Maybe some kids are just different than others.
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Maybe headphones with her fav tunes may help
Does she have sensory issues? Might be something you should discuss with her pediatrician.
Does she go to preschool or daycare?
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Maybe she’s experiencing sensory overload. Or some sort of sensory intolerance.
Does she react to sound ? Bright lights? Cannot handle a large crowd of people?
Have you ever had an assessment for Autism Spectrum Disorder ?
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Do she have autism or is in the spectrum?
Can be also anxiety, overwhelming, the noises , the people .
Try to take her when the places are less crowded and also try some noise canceling headphones
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She might be overwhelmed going out and that’s the only way she knows how to tell you. Keep your calm it happens you aren’t the first and you won’t be the last. When she starts screaming and crying try taking her outside away from everybody and having a calming conversation with her stay calm and calm her down and try again if she does it again repeat going outside she will get past it and it will be OK mama.
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My 7 and 10 year old still be acting a fool in the stores so idk what to tell ya 
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It won’t end as long as you allow it to continue. The worse thing you can do is reward bad behaviour by giving her a treat or toy. No matter were you are leave immediately and tell her the behaviour is not acceptable. Go back to your car and put her in her seat and close the door. Make her aware she is in a time out. It’s up to you if you want to stand outside her door or get in the car, but don’t leave the spot until she calms down and for the love of hod don’t communicate with her, remain silent. Once she calms down tell her you’ll try again. Proceed with what you were doing but if she starts up again then you have to follow through as well. It’s a battle of the wits
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Some people in this group shouldn’t be able to procreate 
… Anyway, mommas you should look into some groups that are more supportive and knowledgeable about the potential condition your little one may have. My daughter can’t handle being in public either and her half brother from her bio dad has been like that since he was little too. He seems to be autistic, which is genetic. If you think there’s a chance your little one could have some kind of neurological difference then definitely talk to her pediatrician about getting a consult with a pediatric neurologist. They can refer you to an ABA therapist which is someone working directly with your child and their behaviors. Figuring out the root of the cause is the first step to helping her. 
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Maybe try noise canceling headphones. Maybe she gets over stimulated fast
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A lot of people have given good advice and I know I already commented. A lot of people are mentioning autism or ADHD because this sounds like sensory processing issues and overstimulation. Even if your kid has NO symptoms of ADHD or Autism, it can still be sensory processing disorder. I’m not sure if it’s been studied, but I’ve noticed personally an uptick in sensory processing issues amongst kids who are currently 5 and under because of all the shutdowns we had with COVID. Think about it, kids before COVID-19 were around a lot more crowds and noises etc as an infant or toddler, but because of safety concerns, a lot of what I call the “Covid kiddos” missed out on that part of their development. There’s a good chance that your little tater will grow out of it, but she’s the right age for this to be the answer. Definitely try the headphones connected to a device with her favorite show playing next time you go and see if it helps. Turn it on BEFORE you go in and not after the crying starts.
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My 4 year old learned real quick momma don’t play that we gonna act like a fool in public. Oh you wanna scream well then we are gonna walk outside away from everyone and wwe arnt coming back to what we are doing untile your done and if you can’t stop we will leave and go home. Now if she’s being a typical kid and just get a little to loud for the environment I will look at her and say inside voice please this is your first and only volume warning if it happens again you take a 5 minute time out to recalibrate. And if we are in a restaurant she knows I will ask for it to go in a heart beat if she starts being disruptive to others bc while I get kids can get overwhelmed it’s my job to teach her the coping skills and that just bc we are overwhelmed we don’t get to take it out on everyone around us!
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Is she autistic or adhd my son 7 has autism I rember him being 3 going to a parade and the fire trucks there alarms set him off I had to carry him kicking screaming home so he wasn’t around the crowed I also have adhd and crowds are stressful I get over stimulated
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I would tell mine I am leaving them ( no I didn’t I would go where I could see them) they will follow. I would absnot reward bad behavior! If for some reason she has some form of spectrum. Then use earphones when out.
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Plan an outing so that after your visit you go to the park or playground, somewhere she wants to go. If she plays up for you pack her in the car and take her home. Thats it outing over. No park no playground. No icecream etc. Straight home…bath pjs and stay in room. Dinner then bed.
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Bust that butt. Play like you don’t hear her.
My guess is over stimulated
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I just calmly set the expectation for my two kids that they were expected to behave before we even left the house and if they didn’t we wouldn’t be going anywhere they liked. Served us well and we are into the teen years now. But they liked going to places and are just overall chill kids so it worked for us.
Not every kid is the same and there could always be other issues causing difficulties.
It will stop when she is punished and has consequences. Stop giving her the snacks or toys. If I would have done that I would have gotten a spanking.
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This screams (no pun intended) overstimulation and sensory processing disorder. It’s most common with kids with ADHD and autism but other children can have it too. Get some good kids headphones (I love Jlab JBuddies pro. They are snug, but not too snug to keep out sound, and they’re wireless. Amazon, Target and probably Walmart have them) and connect them to your phone or their iPad, Kindle kids etc and turn on a show or something they like and see if it helps.
It’s normal for that age. Not much you can do besides leave the store
Mine never did this but i bought mine an iPad to play with at restaurants
Noise cancelling headphones/earmuffs!!
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I started taking mine to restaurants at 6 months old and put in the high chair. Never had problems.
Anxiety. Sensory overload. See an OT for an evaluation to see if they recommend OT to help her.
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Stop rewarding bad behavior. Jesus Christ, if this was my parents back in the day, they would’ve whipped my ass back into shape. That’s the problem with today’s parents. They’re soft on their kids.

Try taking her to a fun place… park, etc. When she screams… you go home and she goes into her room. When she realizes that she doesn’t “win” … that’s how you train her.
Shouldn’t have ever started! If she needs something she needs to tell you quietly. Screaming when you go out is different. Is it the babysitter or she just doesn’t want you going out! Maybe have a new book for the babysitter to read to her. Maybe it will give her something to look forward to when you leave.
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I don’t like the public either 
. I’m 49
Why is it always autism, overstimulated. How about she’s just a spoiled brat
Definitely is having panic attacks and has sensory issues with being around a lot of people. Trust me. I was the same way. Still am but I control it now as an adult. Please don’t get angry with her, try to take her somewhere quiet for awhile and tell her she’s okay, hug her, pray for her, she can’t help it.
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Okay so, I used to be like this, actually it started around she 6 not younger I don’t think. I would get SEVERE panic attacks around large groups of people or unfamiliar places. She probably is going through that. It sounds EXACTLY like what I went through. I would just be so afraid and then start screaming but no one knew what was wrong until a few times after it happens my parents figured it out pretty quickly. Honestly she’s 4 so she can’t explain what she’s feeling too well. Please I hope you read this and take this into consideration.
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Quit rewarding the tantrums.
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It’ll end when she’s about 7ish. Maybe 8. When she starts yelling and you give her a treat or whatever, you’re encouraging it. When my daughter would act out like that, I’d take her hand and leave wherever we are instantly. I would then get a babysitter the next time I’d go out so it would teach her that it’s not appropriate to act out.
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Young one, you must first understand the behavior and what causes it.
You have to take them in public to teach them how to act in public. You have to stay calm and not get embarrassed by your child’s behavior. If not they will manipulate you every time you go out.
The more you take her out, the more chance she has to learning these kinds of life skills and how to behave. I suggest taking her with you when you grocery shop and involving her in what you’re doing. Make a list together and have her put things in the cart and help look for things together. Talk with her in a fun way and involve her. I think a lot of parents do their children a disservice by not bringing them places because it’s a handful, but children can’t learn unless they’re exposed to different environments that call for different ways of behaving. She’ll get there. Just keep being patient and showing her how its done.
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She is 4 she can’t tell you what’s wrong ?
Is this behavior only occurring when you do your errands or when you take her for ice cream or the park does she act the same .
If yes maybe see a Dr
But if no she might need to be educated on how to act in public or get a spanking in private 
Does this child go too b preschool?
take her home when she starts. we were at my daughter’s fav restaurant (she loved their meatballs) when she began to meltdown. She’d be ok for a few minutes then start again.then we noticed they kept seating everyone in the front instead of near us. I asked the waiter if he could make our food to go. daughter started screaming. chef/owner brought our food out all packed and ready to go. he threw in extra meatballs for my daughter then comped our entire meal. we had several parties at his restaurant previously. he told us he appreciated what we were doing. he told my daughter that he hopes she feels better and to come back when she feels better. 
that was the last time she had a meltdown in public.
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Yes it may be a disorder but when they start acting like this you must take them out of the situation and explain the proper way to act and until she can she can not go places.
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Yall are diagnosing a hypothetical child on Facebook, calm down
Honestly it’s for control and your reaction. Just let her and fuck it if anyone says anything. She will do it everytime unless u ignore it.
Try talking to your pediatrician and see if they have any recommendations. Maybe she has anxiety or an underlying condition that can be treated. Autistic children get over stimulated very easily. May I ask if you have tried just leaving when it happens? If so did this calm her down? If it did there is half of your answer. Perhaps your pediatrician can guide you to getting the other half of it. Not all kiddos are sick though either. Some are just super spoiled. I am not saying yours is either one. Stop and assess and just breath Momma. Good Luck to y’all. 
Try making it an adventure, it sounds like maybe you avoid taking her places bc of this. So maybe she’s not as comfortable yet? Have her pick out her outfit, help with her hair. Tell her to look for things that are blue. Maybe making it a game might help. My son is autistic and he never did this, my daughter is not and she did. Ooohh and with her it helped if I made sure it was after a nap and a snack. Good luck mama
How about you stop rewarding her with snacks and a toy when she’s acting like this? Leave where you are and take her home!
My son used to do this. He has a sensory issue. When he was little, I put a cheap pair of headphones (not ear buds) on him (cut the wire) to help drown some sound. He worked for us.
I would talk to a Dr. I’m not in the least bit suggesting medications but it might be something to share with your pediatrician.
Stop taking her places. Go without her. She will prefer being with you.
Assuming that she’s already been fully evaluated and cleared by a peadiatrician for any underlying cause, and with the understanding that this sort of boundary limit pushing is WNL developmentally at this age… shes got YOU trained and conditioned and you are allowing it & making it worse atp.
STOP rewarding the unruly behaviour with the fussing, and pleading & snacks and toys.
She gets your full undivided hovering attention AND treats for doing this.
She won’t stop the meltdown behaviour or even start listen to you, until you change yours.
Tell her ONCE to stop, or we are going home.
If she continues, take her right home straight away.
Tell her, ONCE… ‘we are going home because you didn’t stop screaming when mommy asked you to. Screaming children get brought home.’
Easy , calm, no big deal…but home and to quiet & out of stimulation.
Be consistent with this, and repeat each and every time.
She will get the message soon enough at this age.
Any kid can have a meltdown periodically for a number of usual reasons re: over tired, over stimulated, not feeling well and unable to express it, they are scared or uncomfortable in their surroundings, new situations, etc., however since this has become a chronic frequent pattern developing every time when going out, this gentle age appropriate boundary consequence for the repeating behaviour ( no special mommy fawning, no toys, no snack goodies, and goes straight home )should rectify it to a manageable more comfortable level.
That said, this isn’t insta-fix, once or twice out the gate.
It will require some time, patience and willingness to reinforce this on the parents part to see it through, over time.
If not, back to the Dr. you go.
Good luck.
Could have sensory processing disorder I would try headphones and her favorite show on your phone
Reward the good. Ignore the bad.
Unless - injury is potentially an outcome.
I would take her hand lead her out the door. Look her in her eyes and tell her “ no one wants to hear the loud noise she is making”. “ that voice is for outside”
We are are going back inside and to use her inside voice or she will be punished when we get home for miss behavior.
Did you try asking her why she’s so upset?
It ends when you start being a real parent and stop being a push over
So…you kid has a problem that is effecting them and you haven’t talked to their Dr at all?
I have no advice my 2 year old & 1 year old have not done this in public screaming at home or in the truck when hungry or excited does she have a sensory issue autistic ?? Lack of discipline?? This isn’t normal 
When you discipline your child instead of reward her behaviour 
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