Tips? My baby is 3 weeks old. Little dude does not like being with dad at all. I swaddle him, let him sleep on my chest when we’re awake, rock him, everything and he’ll calm down just fine but dad is taking this pretty hard that baby doesn’t calm down for him no matter what he does…swaddles, a bottle, diaper change, nothing he does calms him down until I get home. Anyone else deal with this? It’s crazy to me that he spent more time with baby in the nicu than I did but he doesn’t seem to bond well with dad.
11 Likes
Tell Dad to try wrapping the baby in an unwashed shirt you’ve worn recently.
7 Likes
Have a shirt that smells like you wrapped with him while w dad
1 Like
Lay in bed, skin to skin, with babe between you two. And ultimately it’s because he knows your body. Not dad’s. So stuff with just you, while dad is nearby. Read about the fourth trimester and assure dad that it’s normal for baby to have parental preferences off and on for their entire life.
3 Likes
He has a natural bond with you. The bond with dad needs to be created, and will with time, as long as dad stays trying and involved. Babies also sense stress, frustration, and anxiety. Help dad remain calm while holding baby or doing these caregiving tasks. Dad can swaddle and or hold baby skin to skin to help with bonding.
4 Likes
Get dad to hold baby close on his chest skin to skin get him to talk and sing to baby
1 Like
Don’t leave him alone with until you’re confortable doing so. If the baby would not stopping when you’re gone would get mad and shake him??
4 Likes
Pretty soon he won’t like being with you either and then I’ll only be like Dad
it’s the “4th” trimester, look it up, he knows your smell, maybe he’s afraid he’ll miss you like when in nicu like experienced before … no give her back type of thing. try wearing a shirt of his long enough to smell like mom, then have dad wear it when he holds baby
2 Likes
If Dad is nervous or worried, those feelings transfer to the little one. Just keep trying
2 Likes
It’s absolutely normal , the baby lived 9 months inside you so yours bond is natural , dad needs to be more patient and be persistent,he will get there
2 Likes
Ok it’s hard being a new mom thus you are over thinking this a touch as is he. The more he handles the baby the easier it gets. Have him take one of your shirts and use it with the swaddle blanket so it smells like you. But don’t worry dad will find his own way
Dads most likely nervous/doubting himself and the baby can feel it. He needs to be confidant and patient with the little one. They will find their rhythm in no time
. Dad has to stop being so hard on himself tho you are all that baby hasknown its whole life so of course you are the firat thing the baby reaches for for comfort
2 Likes
Have him wear something you’ve worn and baby’s are the tiniest little empaths and feel everything
2 Likes
Lots of great advice in these comments!
1 Like
Give him one of your shirts or something that you have worn….
Probably feels like dad is feeling uncomfortable and that’s why he won’t calm down, dad prolly feeling anxiety and baby can sense that.
1 Like
If you have a NICU baby, it’s actually extremely common for babies (and us moms) to go through separation anxiety not during but AFTER the NICU. He finally came home and now he’s scared he’ll be ‘taken’ from mommy again. I went through it with my 2nd after 31 days in the NICU, it’ll get easier though I know it sucks for dad. Just remind him the baby just spent their entire life inside YOU, that’s what’s his ‘normal’ so it takes time to adjust to other people and surroundings 
just have him keep trying to bond, it’ll stick!
He feels dad’s anxiety too. Tell dad to relax. It’s ok if baby cries a little. They will both ha e to find thier way. Let dad feed the baby when possible too. Thus is all normal and just takes time and patience. 
congratulations!
3 Likes
Skin to skin & tell dad to relax
I’m sorry mama. I went through this with my son but it was me the baby didn’t want, not my husband. Sometimes they can REALLY pick up on the stress/anxiety coming from the parent. Have dad just try his best to relax into it (as hard as that can be) and hope for the best. Xx it will get better.
3 Likes
This is pretty normal til they’re one.
It’s normal,bubs spends most time with you,the bond will grow with time with dad and bubs is newborn still so thinks her whole world is just you
It’s normal, why would his feelings be hurt over a newborn 
Oh please he’s 3 week old you have the smells he is used to why make it such a big deal
Dad needs to relax, if he is worried, scared, nervous or tense your little one can feel it.
Tell him to keep holding and loving on that baby skin to skin contact will help too. That baby lived in you for a long time and knows you inside and out. Right now you’re his comfort zone you’re little one will adjust. 
The baby spent 9 months inside your body listening to your heartbeat. He is a brand new human. He will learn. Good luck Mama.
2 Likes
He is three weeks! Really? Give it some time.
Give dad your shirt you slept in. It’ll have your scent and help baby calm down until baby is use to dads smell. It helped with all my kids including my 4 week old. It’ll take time but he will get use to dad we spent all our time supplying everything baby needed…they only know us.
Maybe you guys can cuddle and swaddle together where the baby feels both of you together and start seeing you two as one and one as you both