My boyfriend has become distant: Advice?

Look out something is up with him he getting to run away from you for why he don’t know and he will say it’s not you it’s him look out

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Probably cheating. And after 6 years he should of already put a ring in it.

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I wouldn’t blame it all on covid. Seems alot of people are, but your situation is EXACTLY like my last one. 6 years 2 kids, wouldn’t even hold my hand or hug me anymore, tried to ask him why and he didn’t see a problem. I made him leave. Our kids just turned 2 and 3 when I kicked him out. BEST DESISION EVER! My life has gotten so much better, New man treats me and my kids like were supposed to be. Life goes on…not worth staying if it make you miserable

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Give him extra love and attention, see if theres anything you can do to help him out. When hes ready to talk he will. If he really just doesn’t want to talk dont pressure him too.much. he might need space to work out whatever hes going through

Winter depression is real, and really effects relationships.
Get a sitter and go on a date night.

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Talk…to…him! If you think something is going on, get to the root of whatever it may be. You don’t always know what’s going on in someone else’s head. Good luck :hugs:

Tell him calmly…
“I’ve been thinking, and I’m so sorry to have to do this… It’s not you , its me… But I think we should break up”

Whatever his reaction is… You’ll know if he’s cheating, found someone else… OR if he’s dumbfound and shocked, like where’s this coming from… Then maybe he’s just going through something himself and doesn’t know how to deal with it🤷

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Has anything else changed? Jobs? Management? Family issues? Health issues? The information given isn’t much so it’s hard to determine anything really.

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Does he have a job? Maybe it’s work-related and he could just be under a lot of stress. My husband used to be the same way. Could be up for a promotion and just want to keep it as a surprise? Just thinking logically

Sounds just like my boyfriend. He ended up being depressed and committed suicide :pleading_face: maybe try couples therapy?

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Make him some f of his favorite things and be nice and caring. That way you can be certain it’s not You driving him away. He could be overwhelmed or depressed. Be there fir him and don’t be doubting or accusing him. By the same token, take care of you as well. Don’t fight don’t be defensive but do state how you feel And perhaps he will open up as to what is bothering him. Be super kind always so that he can Never put blame on you should he stray. And you cannot force someone to love you. You can only nurture the love to grow :woman_shrugging:t2:. If by chance he does want to go. He will be leaving a kind and loving person who deserves better. If he should try to pic a fight, state how you feel and if he accuses you of anything just say you are sorry he feels that way but never tell someone what they do or don’t do. You can only know how an action makes you feel, not why he did whatever it is that bothers you. That is key!!

Has it been since this lockdown he’s been like this people are struggling alot more. Could that play an attribute x

Boyfriend for 6years? With 2children​:roll_eyes::roll_eyes: was his intention settling down with you? Is he guilty of sth? You know him better to give him that much as a “boyfriend”

When you figure it out let me know :tired_face::upside_down_face:

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I’d flat out ask him what is happening. Don’t come at him sideways. Start nice and calm. If he says nothing is wrong mention the changes. Guys sometimes don’t like to talk about feelings. But if he doesn’t want to tell you he won’t. You have to decide what to do from there

Could just be a funk

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Maybe he’s planning to propose n is nervous n doesn’t want to ruin the surprise so he’s being distant??

My husband of 7 years has become like this for the whole of 2020. Come 2021 mid January I found out he was sleeping with my nanny who’s my cousin and was seeing his ex and another girl he met online. Yours could be different though, maybe ask him upfront what’s up. Better to know earlier than later.

Are y’all having financial problems or something?? Are you leaving something out?

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Wow. I’m shocked at the comments. Yall do know men get depressed

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Big fat giant red flag!! :triangular_flag_on_post:

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It has been a tough year for all of us. A Little time and understanding might be the best thing you can do.

“I ask him but he says nothing is wrong”

People on Facebook- try talking to him about it

:eyes:🤦 If he doesn’t want to say what it is just wait for him to talk about it when he’s ready.

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I would like to know how long its been going on.

He could be on drugs? Or gambling

Either depression or infidelity

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Call Cheaters to watch him. Find out for sure whats going on before you waste anymore time on him.

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Maybe it’s depression…get him to see a doc.

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Prepare for a break up

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Well I need more information and I’ll get to the bottom of this :rofl::woozy_face:

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Depression can make someone distant. For sure

Heres a suggestion…TALK TO HIM.

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Don’t chase him…let him be and if things don’t change leave him before he leaves you :100:

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This year has been hard on everyone. I would start there and just listen

I’m truly sorry. I really am, but this distance has a name.

Some people are just so bitter… talk to you bf.

Maybe up to no good keep watching him

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could be he is sick or he found someone else

Well I’m single and love kids may be I can help . I’m 58 just saying

Have good old fashion sex and lay in bed and talk after.

My husband started doing this and he was cheating

Maybe he’s just generally bored.

Sit down and have a serious conversation with him…

He has another one waiting for him

From a male’s perspective:
It could be someone else has his interest but that’s not 100%.
There are many things to factor in. Does he have a job? What shift does he work? Are there any issues at said job? Has this happened during winter? Has anything changed in the relationship as far as money or responsibility goes?

A man will get inside his own head and stay there, most hide their feelings and the simplest things can throw us off, even the weather. He could simply he bored, not of you just in general. All this to consider when you talk to him, whatever you do do not get offended or take it as a joke because it’s something stupid to you, to us it is what’s going on. Some women may find things small and stupid but to men they are major, try to understand where he is coming from.

Do whatever you’d like us to do whenever y’all say everything is “fine”. Lol

Peace out girl— save yourself. Just went through this with my ex of almost 9 years. He stopped complimenting me after our son was born, never wanted to touch me etc. He broke up with me & I found out he was cheating on me for the last 4 months of our relationship with a girl 8 years younger than him. I wish I wouldn’t have ignored the warning signs & red flags. And yes, he told me he was happy too :roll_eyes:

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He’s probably burnt out and exhausted. Covid has taken its toll on EVERYONE. People have to remember this.

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Have you tried asking him what’s going on? Is this sudden? Could he just be depressed and overwhelmed with life? I mean if he is taking care of the household financially during this pandemic and just the normal financial responsibilities of a man who has kids it couldn’t get pretty draining

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I’m gonna just be crazy here, and suggest you talk to him. Not necessarily about this specifically… Just ask him how hes doing… How his day was. Don’t be needy, be genuine. He may be depressed and don’t know how to talk about it

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Hire a P.I… if he’s not willing to express himself to you anymore when you ask him about it, something might be going on. I sense a guilty conscience if he won’t “look” at you anymore.

Try couples counseling. Restart the romance, start the dating all over again! Make moves, spice it up.

My heart was filled with pain for the past 7 months when my husband ended our marriage and went to his EX lover because i was unable to give him a son. I was so devastated and almost committed suicide. I asked everyone i knew for help but all my were useless not until a friend refereed me to prophet Marere, I got in touch with him and i poured out everything i had in mind to him and he promised to make me smile and make me live a better life by getting my husband back. just few days later. my husband came back pleading on his knees for I to forgive him and he promise to been a better man for me and today we are back together happy. If anyone out there needs help of any-kind, get in touch with the prophet marere now he will help you out. E-mail:marerespells@gmail. com Call/text: and whatsapp +2348109805184

Try sucking his dick

Geez yall are some JADED MFs lol. Look. Mine gets in these little funks where he kinda gets distant, and he snaps out every time. And every time it’s because he works 12+ hours a day, every day, and is just burnt out and exhausted , or hes just dealing with personal shit. He knows I’m here for him and I will support him no matter what, and he snaps out of it every time. Guys get stressed too. Sit him down and talk to him. Don’t jump to the worst conclusion just because he seems a little distant. Hell mine even does it if he’s planning a surprise for me. Could be a lot of things.

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Ask him again. If he doesn’t give you a straight answer then tell him to fck off! That’s it. After 6 yrs and 2 kids he should be able to openly express himself to you. Girl bye!

Could he be depressed

cheating most definitely

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Either he is seeing someone else or he is going through some depression or mental stress… do some detective work , thats the only way you will know if he needs help or you needs to go .

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Get yourself well dressed, cook your best meal for the family and when finished clran up and then say you’re going out, even if its just for a very long walk or drive. Do this once or twice a week, making sure you do this for a month or two see how he handles that.

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I’m going through the same thing. Always seems to be hiding stuff sneaking around lying. We’ve been together 15yrs

Sorry but been there sounds like a guilty conscience. Hope I’m wrong for your sake.

I agree either he’s depressed about work or life or he’s seeing someone else
I would have a real talk and then decide what’s best for you

Maybe that’s just the way he is. If his into his phone mostly or going out randomly with nothing much important ,then maybe he’s cheating.

He could be a bit depressed

Sounds like time for a couples week or weekend at least. No kids , No phones, let sitter know and emergency number to reach you.

Ask him why the hell after 6 years and two kids are you still just a girlfriend. :neutral_face:

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Probs found someone else.

He may just be depressed or maybe be feels like he did something to not make u happy ik my husband got like that around 2 years weve only been together going on 4 but it happens just try to slowly watch the situation and how his mood changes. So if he is happy when its yall two and then depressed when others r around maybe he feels like he doesnt make u as happy as they do. Just watch the situation but im not sure wat to do. Me and my husband r ok now.

His type of behaviour doesn’t always mean cheating. Maybe he’s just not happy in the relationship anymore and doesn’t know what to do and is struggling. You just need to talk to him and ask straight out what’s up. And be persistent about it if you want answers

The first 7years is always the hardest no matter if b/F or husband and wife those are the test years of things yes it could be he is really looking on how he can get a better job compared to what he has or both of you might need a date night together and bring back the romance or plan a picnic in the front room put a blanket down make some sandwich and chips and whatever you like to drink

It could be so many things. People may be so quick to say there is someone else but this isn’t always the case. There could be so much more or maybe he’s down and can’t even understand why (happens to me) sure it happens to many.

As hard as it may be be consistent in trying to speak to him (consistent not pushy) as hard as it may be. He will eventually open up and talk when he is ready about whatever may be bothering him for this unusual behaviour.

All the best. Hang in there. Be supportive and understanding.

I became very distant after my second was born because I was hiding PPD, soon after things got better I realised that I wasn’t the only one suffering. He could most definitely be depressed… dig deeper

Maybe living with covid is having an impact on his mental health and feeling overwhelmed with how it affects him and his family. Maybe that is just the reality he has just snapped with all it has changed.

Something is wrong. Explain to him that it he is being distant with you, which is emotional abuse. A good relationship has good communication. What you allow is what will be.

I would worry especially if thats not his normal he could be depressed or cheating an feels guilty but you owe it your kids yourself an him to find out an then figure it out from there because what affects you affects your kids an we have to stop producing broken versions of us it might hurt what you find out but it will help you develop an you could be helping him good luck

Try talking to him. My husband gets like this when he is struggling with something in his own head x

Marriage and kids is a big responsibility ,he may be just feeling it right now. Just listen to him and let him know he’s not alone. It didn’t always have to mean there is something wrong with the relationship. Life is stressful these days!

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Something is definitely wrong. Relationships go through phases like this. You have to decide how you are going to respond to it. Push him away or pull him closer. If he is looking at his life and saying is this all there is going to be for me. I will never do this or go there. You know the part of your care free single life that you gave up to focus on a family. My advice is to let him know that his family loves him and all that stuff you think you gave up is nothing compared to the love his family has for him

When this happened with my husband, and I begged him to go to counseling or church or anything we could do together as a couple to get closer, he said no. He started being unnecessarily mean to me about dumb stuff so I finally just left him. I figured he must not like me anymore and if he did, he would let me know. Instead he was just mad I left and blamed me for our issues and started texting another woman. Go with your gut. You deserve to be treated well.

If he changes his habits goes when didn’t use too try’s to fix up himself tanning lose weigh ignores you in bed look out

He’s got a side-piece and trying to figure out how to tell ya.

Leave him at home with kids over the week end and see what happens.

He’s probably cheating. Kick him to curb and move on…

As a man who has been through many different types of relationships all with their own issues. He is either depressed or just bored with life nothing interesting is going on or ever happens.

Try being spontaneous but in ways he will appreciate might lift his spirits.

Look out another woman

Probaly the super bowl

Not to be petty, but treat him exactly how he’s treating you, see if he brings it up to you?