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QUESTION:
“My bf refuses to acknowledge me anymore n social media. He will not like my posts let alone comment on them. Posting pics of us together is a no go. I have, and tagged him in them but he never comments. I’ve said things about it but he just laughs at me. I am 49, he’s 52. I am proud to say I’ve got a better body than most women half my age, he likes chubbier women. And his last gf he posted tons of pictures w was in her 30s and much bigger than me. I’ve had multiple guys hit on me, some seem pretty decent. But my bf and I aren’t “seeing other people “. I’m wondering if I should start? And should I tell him I’ve started? I don’t want to be a “cheater” despite the fact that when we first started dating he told me he’s not ready for a relationship.”
TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
“It sounds like you guys aren’t on the same page. He said he doesn’t want a relationship, but you are expecting relationship qualities.”
“That’s not a boyfriend. If he’s ashamed or won’t share about you, that’s a biiiiiig red flag. Sorry to say xxx”
“Maybe he’s just matured since his last girlfriend and doesn’t feel the need to post everything on social media. My partner rarely does either and we definitely don’t do soppy on there x”
“You aren’t in high school anymore. Why feel the need to post everything and get validation for it? How is he in your actual relationship? That’s what counts.”
“Why would u tell him? Just leave him so u can freely do as you please…or tell him social media acknowledgement is a deal breaker for you😑”
“Then he’s not your boyfriend. And what effort and energy you put into a relationship that he doesn’t want is your choice but don’t expect him to put forth the same effort or adhere to boyfriend standards when he said he didn’t want a relationship and you are trying to make what you have into one.”
“Social media is just another thing to complain about. When you are out in public together does he stay away from you? Does he hide you from others in real life? I am 31 and my man doesn’t post me either and I couldn’t give a shit less. Before Facebook was even a thing did it matter?? People are so simple minded. The fact that you are putting yourself above everyone is gross and I wouldn’t post you either… grow up… you’re how old again… didn’t you have dating experiences before Facebook was a thing?”
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