Hey anyone have any advice my oldest daughter has friends that say there her friends but they do stuff without telling her and she feels left out and has been upset for weeks are they true friends what should we do.
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There is many ways to encourage her to
I know the feeling with my daughter. She is always left out!
No thats not normal if its consistent. Tell her to keep these “friends” but, to also make new friends.
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It’s just life. People are gonna leave other people out sometimes. All I can say is, if they’re true friends, they should all have a discussion and her tell them, look, I at least want to be invited, even if the plans might be something that I’m not into, just so I feel included, because it makes me feel like you guys don’t even think about me, and it hurts.
I’d try to help her make new friends and recognize and make those emotions and figure out how to make friends that don’t make you feel that way - or at least respect you enough to be honest or to tell you what’s up.
They don’t sound like her friends. Not good ones at least.
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Have you advised her to communicate these feelings with her friends? Learning how to openly communicate feelings respectfully and honestly is such a good trait to have. They may not realize that they’re doing it, or they may be closer with each other than your daughter. No one will know until your daughter goes to them with her feelings. I’d start there before assuming they’re not true friends.
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If they we’re friends, they wouldn’t treat her like that. Tell her to find nicer friends who are nice to everyone
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Watch brene brown’s marble jar conversation with her daughter it might help.
Stay out of it! They need to learn to negotiate and work things out themselves…
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Teach your kid that her friends relationships outside of her don’t involve her. If they choose to do something together without her she needs to just go on about her day. Pick up a hobby, call another friend, etc.
People can be friends with lots of people and don’t have to include all of their friends in their activities.
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She can try to communicate with them about how it makes her feel or She can organize activities and invite them. I personally just quit looking for my “tribe” (friends) and accepted the fact that my husband and mom are my tribe. I put years of my life and effort into being a good friend, helping others, being there and trying to build those connections to just continually be crapped on and watch them all gush about their “tribe” and doing this and that with them while never being included. If “friends” are truly friends they include and make time.
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Needs a new group of friends…
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Gotta teach her to keep her head up and not let it bother her, there’s nothing wrong with flying solo. Time to make some other friends to
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These are not true friends. Teach her to not let them see her sweat. Persue new friends next school year and don’t give them the satisfaction.
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Make new friends. Maybe they’ve been friends longer and have a history. The Newby always feels left out if not invited. Needs to find something else to occupy her time , sports etc
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Well . How old?!?! That’s a big thing
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Let’s be honest if they were her real “true friends” she wouldn’t be having those feelings; I said what I said.
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UM. People have different circles that they do things with. Well at least I do, don’t mean they are not her friends. Just saying…
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I was the kid who straight up asked? Is there problem? Are we not friends so I don’t waste my time on you. Etc.
Let her know now she has herself and family ,people are awful 75% of the time.
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Nothing
Have your daughter invite other friends over
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Ahh teenagers. The reality is teen girls are horrible. Honestly they aren’t her friends but you telling her that is not going to help. I would suggest spending time with her and just listening. During this Time or later ask her what does she think it means to be a good friend. How would she treat herself if the situation was reversed. What would she tell herself to do. Encourage her to set healthy boundaries for herself. Unfortunately not everyone is your friend. It’s a hard lesson to learn. Learning to like and love yourself and believe you deserve to be treated well by your friends, boyfriends, etc… . is hard for adults not alone teens. It’s a skill so many of our girls and boys today lack. You can help her develop that strong sense of self by not fixing it but guiding her through the teenage mind field, is the best thing you can do. Unfortunately you can’t stop the hurt. She is going to have to navigate it herself.
She should make new friends but also friends don’t always have to do all activities together
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Make som.e new friends she will then compare and learn
You should know better than to ask this question. You know they aren’t true friends. Teach her that. There’s nothing wrong with her going off and doing stuff alone or finding other people to spend time with.
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How does she know if shes been left out? Are they bragging in front of her? If so, they’re not her friends and she needs to find other friends.
Have her join a youth group meet new people