What can I do if my child out right REFUSES to potty train? She freaks out at the sight of the potty. She is 3-years-old, advice?
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When she is ready she will go; the more you push her the worse it will get
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Wait until she is ready.
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She will when she is ready. Keep introducing her to it.
Location… Where do you have her potty?? I had to sit the potty in front of the TV she watched bubble guppies and had fruit snacks while she went
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My son was like this. He refused to use the potty and he literally woke up one day and decided he wanted to use the big boy potty. He just wasn’t ready before so I tried not to force him so I wouldn’t scare him away from it.
My son is 3 also and acts the same about the potty. My 10 year old was the same way. Give her a break for awhile, then try again. She may not be quite ready yet.
I talk to my daughter about telling me she needs to use the potty. every time I change her butt I tell her she’s a big girl now & has to start using the big girl potty. I sing potty potty potty to her and laugh and smile to help her think it’s a happy thing lol sometimes I strip her down & make her sit on the potty while I cook, give her a book maybe a cookie or some kind of snack. Keep blowing her kisses and smiling at her every couple minutes ignore the cries &she will get use to it. Every time I take her off I go through the motions of wiping her and helping her get back dressed let her flush the potty wash hands & give lots of high fives and tickles! Tell her she did such a good job using the big girl potty! I got a little discouraged lately because she still wasn’t telling me & using potty on herself… but yesterday she told me potty and grabbed my hand and lead the way 
Just keep introducing it to her by the time she’s three and a half is probably going to just go away and she’ll potty trained very quickly like mine did he was potty trained in a week and had that same issue starting out at 3 years old
Let her pick out her big girl underwear. Also maybe get her own toddler toilet and let her pick it out. So she’s more inclined to use it. first just set it out in the living room and let her get used to the idea of it. Then in a month or two, when you go to the bathroom take it in the bathroom with you and have her sit on it. Not go to the bathroom just sit on it. See how it goes from there.
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Just keep on it. Explain shes a big girl no more diapers. Keep her in underwear they usually don’t like to mess on them selves. If your home for 3 or more days with her keep her in a tshirt only and just keep taking her to the potty. The earlier kids are introduced to the potty the easier it is that’s why we start at 12 months at the daycare. When kids get older and realize what it is they are more resistant. Good luck
You need to end the power struggle. Drop the subject of training, and start talking about the things she will be able to do when she’s graduated to big girl pants. Everything from choosing her own panties, to a treat that is special…but wait until she wants to do it!
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Give her a prize ever other time she goes. Something she likes. A piece of candy, a piece of sugar free gum, a toy of some sort. Something that puts a bell in her head that says O if I go potty or or poop I’ll get a prize.
Skip it. She’ll be trained by the time kindergarten comes around.
Kids don’t potty train on your schedule. She’s gotta show interest in it. If she’s not showing any interest and you are forcing her… you’re going to do more damage than good
When I trained my oldest they use to have these seats that you sat on the toilet so it didn’t look so scary it had a horses head on it that squeaked when she touched it in no time she didn’t even realize that she was going as a matter of fact when she had to go she use to tell me horsey not potty I don’t know if they have them anymore but it sure did help with her
I had a really loud bell, the only time my 3 kids got to touch it was when they used the potty. If Mommy used it, but they didn’t I got to ring the bell. Work like a dream. Same way for all 3.
I’m in the same boat with my son. You just gotta wait it out. You can’t force them to do something they don’t wanna do.
My 3 year old did try but all of the sudden she lost interest.
Show her videos of kids using the potty or take her to visit a friend or cousin who is currently using the potty. Peer pressure works so fast!
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Wait!! Don’t force it. When she is ready it will come.
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I would say wait, when they are ready they will let you know.
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My daughter turned 3 in March and just started going potty in the last month or so. It’s like something just clicked and she got it. Try not to stress about it and let it happen. I just kept trying but acted like it wasn’t a big deal and that worked for her much more than when I stressed about it.
Wait. She will do it easily when she’s ready.
This one my son - he’d scream if I asked him to sit on the potty.
One day, about two weeks ago, I was so frustrated with changing diapers and just said “ok. I’m done with diapers - I’m tired of changing your butt. Tomorrow we aren’t using them anymore. You can either pee your pants or pee in the potty tomorrow.” I repeated it all night.
The next day he peed everywhere… but one time I caught him mid-pee and tossed him on the toilet… my parents came running and had a massive freak out/celebration. That’s where it clicked for him. It’s been two weeks now and next to no accidents. He just needed to motivation and to have it click that this was a really good thing.
I had started reading a really good potty training book that helped me find the courage to finally make the switch. Feel free to PM me if you want more info 
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My daughter was 3 in may and we aren’t anywhere close to being trained lol we agonized for 2 years over my son with potty training and he didn’t train until he was almost 4 finally on his own so with her we just going to let her do on her own way less stressful
My son just turned 3 in June. I tried these past 2 weeks (because the guilt was consuming me alive) and it’s been a bit stressful, not to mention I’m 33 weeks pregnant. I’m honestly not rushing it anymore , and I’m loving all of these mommas commenting saying don’t force it. It makes me feel so much better. I’m right there with you mama! The pressure & guilt can be overwhelming, but our little ones will get there. 
Stop buying diapers and leave her in wet underwear til she realizes she doesnt like that.
We just made it as low stress as possible and gave our toddler full control over where he went potty. It worked great for him as he just decided one day he was ready to always wear big boy undies! Pull ups still for night time or long car rides to be safe. We would just ask him what he wanted to wear and if he had any accidents we the only thing we said about it was just “its okay, accidents happen” and clean it up.
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U can buy a mini potty and just have it in the restroom and u can ask if she wants to go when u go. Bring books and treats when she uses it! And make a BIG deal when she sits on it or even uses it!! Claps and hugs and lots of praise!!
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My son was like that, I realized he didn’t like using the potty and preferred the toilet like we use so I got the toilet attachment with a character he liked on it and a step stool. He was fully potty trained in 2 weeks
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I bought my wee girl a potty that look like an actual toilet and it even makes flushing sounds I tried her with every other one and she hated them and would scream the house down as soon as she seen it till I bought her the mini toilet one and since then she has been doing amazing still has accidents now and again but she loves it
I’m not forcing it. It’s a natural thing. They’ll do it whenever they’re comfortable. Try and just use positive talk about using potty though.
What has worked best for me is stop pressuring, dum dum lollipops as a prize and just reminding them the potty is there but not pressuring. My daughter is 3 1/2. Will pee no problem but poop has been difficult but she’s getting there. The lollipops work so well for us.
I made it exciting for my daughter. I took her out and let her pick out her potty and her big girl undies. When she had an accident in her new undies, we “threw” them away. That upset her. We also let her run around naked a good bit too.
My son is 3 1/2 and finally just got it the past couple weeks. We tried everything and had to keep stopping and coming back to it. Eventually i went to the dollar store and bought fake pirate coins and a bunch of little prizes. Hes obsessed with money. We made a deal that every time he went potty in the potty he got a coin and at the end of the day he could buy a toy. He loved it. I set an alarm for every 20 min. If he didn’t want to sit and try i said ok but no money. Eventually he loved sitting even if he didnt go so i would give him a coin. Put them all in an envelope and had all the toys in a basket and he could buy what he wanted. Its been 4 weeks now and occassionally we have accidents but hes doing awesome and telling me when he has to go. Havent done the toys or money in about a week now either. Hes just doing it
She may not be ready yet every child is different… my son is 4.5 years old and has been fully potty trained during the day since March of this year.
Don’t push it, it was do more harm than good. She will do it when she is ready, not when you want her to.
Maybe she’s not ready. My oldest was almost 4 before she was while my other two were 2…
more time. my daughter didnt want to do it either. she fully trained before her 4th birthday.
My daughter is 3 and shes only just started going to the potty/toilet…i got her “big girl knickers” with her choice design on them . She did a full day (tshirt and knickers day)without a nappy and 3 accidents and a nappy on at night. Shes gone alot more confident in the last week with no accidents in the day and pull ups at night while shes still figuring that process out.
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My first daughter we bribed her with tablet time. We had never really let her get her hands on electronics at that point, so this was amazing to her. But she only watched toilet training cartoons and videos on YouTube.
Our second is a stubborn mule so it wasn’t happening until she was ready. She hated the little training toilet. She would only sit on the big toilet with the ring seat. She would scream until we let her off the toilet. And then one day we walked past the bathroom and she was sitting in the toilet. And she was done with diapers. 
My Son is 3 in November iv been trying it just hasnt clicked at all he will sit on the potty but do nothing, i will keep trying a couple times a week to see when it will happen. 
Does she enjoy doing things that you do? If so, I would start doing things like letting her help cook and so on. For example mixing batter and adding ingredients. After she does those things that mommy does I would tell her that you can use the toilet together too. Like her on a smaller potty and you on the bigger one. Tell her if she wants to help do things that mom does she needs to use the toilet too. I say this because my only daughter always wanted to help me do things around the house at this age and younger so when it came to using the potty I used that. She did things like helping with the dishes, washing windows and help cook. Dishes was more her playing in the water but she was occupied and young kids do like helping more than we think they do. Also a good teaching method with other life skills.
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My grandson refused to. He didn’t freak out he was just stubborn. He was 3 in June and going to go to preschool in the fall. He was excited about it but when it came time to buy school supplies mom bought them only for his older brother. He asked her why he didn’t get any and told him because he had to go to the potty like a big boy if wanted to go to school. He wasn’t even wetting the bed within a couple weeks. It’s their way of controlling their actions and when other things don’t fall into place because of it they quickly learn what is important.
My 5 year old is I’m underwear all day, I started with candy if she goes potty but I put her in underwear and she tells me she has to go potty now. I have to start potty training her twin sister but she is so stubborn I have to get her to start doin it. My 3 year old is kind of interested not much, my 2 year old always says she wants to go potty but she never uses the potty. Try ur child with candy, or a prize. Put underwear on ur child and tell her that if she has to go potty to tell u.
After all and all out fights when potty training when mine was 3 and he went and climbed under the table and pooped his pants after I let him off the potty I made him clean it up himself. Last accident he ever had
He said it was really gross I said yes why do you think I don’t want to do it
I bought “pretty” big girl panties for my oldest, she could only wear them after using the potty, I also took her in there every time I went, which was often because I was pregnant with her little sister. Every time she used the potty she got to wear the big girl panties, if she had an accident she went into the pull-ups. She decided she did not like the pull ups so she just one day stopped having accidents during the day time. Took a little longer for dry nights.
Wait… Give it another 6 months and try again. You’ll be dealing with a whole different child developmentally (6 months makes a huge difference in these little guys) and should have very little “training” to do.
Maybe she’s just not ready yet 
Dont stress or push her.
We went to toilet and knickers. Accidents happen but she is very intelligent and didn’t want to get wet. Pull ups didn’t work for us as she didn’t mind an accident as the pull up kept her dry. She hated the feel. Of wet clothes so became very aware very quickly. 4 accidents total from whenwe put her in knickers. No nappies or pull ups at night from 2 weeks and no accidents from the 3rd week onwards. She is 2.5years old
Wait until she is ready. My oldest was fully potty trained by the time he was 2, his decision. He absolutely HATED wet diapers. My youngest was terrified of the sound of a toilet flushing. He started peeing in the potty at 2 but would not poop in the potty until he was almost 4. He thought he would get sucked in. Kids know when they’re ready.
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My son was half potty trained by 1 1/2. He didn’t like poop. Then he was potty trained during the day at 3 1/2. Then I bought a plastic toddler mattress and he didn’t like being wet at night.
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With my two boys I did potty brakes every 20 min and that worked. Potty training my daughter now and so far she likes to pick her underpants out and just wear those on days she wants to potty train. Good luck!
I let my kid run around naked while he potty trained. He absolutely refused until I did that. We had a few messes but it was worth it in the end. He was also 3.
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She will when she is ready. My tip for mine was get rid of the diapers. Yes lots of laundry but she HATeED wet clothes.
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Don’t force it or you and your daughter will be miserable. She won’t like it. My pediatrician said let my kids decide and one day they decided to go and that was the end of that. She’s still really hung yet.
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My daughter had trouble with potty training for like a year but what worked for her was watching another child use the potty. My 5 year old niece peed in my 2 year olds little toilet thing while she watched. After that it just clicked in her brain and she’s been using the potty ever since.
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My Son had trouble potty training, took him too the bathroom every couple of hours…I think 5 he finally used the potty with no trouble. I would suggest making a game out of it perhaps some rewards maybe let her pick out her own little potty to use.
What worked for both my children was I took them to the dollar tree. I let them pick their own “reward basket” and then let them pick anything they to as rewards to fill it up. After that I reminded them every time we tried to get them to use the potty that they would get a reward from their basket if they peed. Both were potty trained by 2
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If shes not ready then I wouldn’t rush it. That’s the worse thing to do. Mine was 4.5 when she was finally potty trained. Yes, I was embarrassed but it was better than making her scared
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I put panties on my daughter lol and the first time she peed in them was the last time ., she was so grossed out and she was about 3 she just kept saying yuck mommy peepee on my leg ! She trained instantly after that
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Okay what I did was mean but when my kiddo refused. I took her diaper off and said u don’t wanna go on the potty then pee on yourself and u better clean it up here’s the mop and rags. After once peeing on herself she began to go on the kiddo toilet and every time she did her business on the kiddy potty she got a sticker. So my kid only did it once and decided she didn’t like to per herself and bam potty trained in a day. Oh yes and she was 2 1/2-3 years old too.
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I know boys train later but I was convinced my son would enter kindergarten in a pull up. He didn’t. Don’t push it or you can end up with problems later. When she is ready she will do it.
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Mine wouldn’t either… she was 4 when finally it happened. She’s now 21 and fully trained 
it will happen!
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I just went thru this, my daughter turned 3 a few weeks ago and she refused to use the potty so we just took the diaper off and away… within a few days she stopped having accidents and is now potty trained.
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Don’t force it, she’s not ready. Be patient and loving. Get her some books about the potty and videos about the potty. Sing some songs, lots of hugs and she’ll explore it all on her own when she’s ready. 
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My daughter used to do the same thing. I took her to the store let her pick out her own underwear and made it seem exciting. She would still cry and cry and say she doesn’t want to. So eventually I gave us pressuring and on her own she started taking off her diaper and saying she doesn’t want it and wanted underwear
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It’s frustrating and despite her age, it sounds like she’s just not ready. The more you force the harder it is.
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Don’t push her let her do it on her own, I let my kids on their own and all before they turned 3 they learned. My friend pushed her daughter and keep pushing her she learned but was a bed wetter at night. So don’t stress them to much.
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She will when she is ready. Don’t let it frustrate you. My boys weren’t completely potty trained til they were almost 4
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My daughter was 5 yrs 2 mths before she was trained. She won’t walk down the aisle in diapers. Give her time.
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When she is ready she will let you know. If you force it, then the one being potty trained is you to get her to the potty when you think it’s time for her to go. Yes, 3 is old enough for some kids. Not all kids are the same. Hang in there , mama. Signed, mother of 4 that all toilet responsibly, even though 2 of them were really not trained until they were 4. 
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Hey I didn’t learn until I was 5. My mother forced me to potty train after she traumatized me for using the toilet once. I can say that is not okay to do to a child trying to learn something. My oldest son is 2.5 and is afraid of the toilet. I do not force him to go on it or stress myself out. He isn’t ready and everyone is trying to talk me into forcing him to learn. It takes time and when he’s ready, that’s when I’ll start potty training. However he has preschool this year and I have to at least try soon.
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They have to want to do it- she might not be ready. I would start with a book and maybe a doll with a play potty so she can get more used to the idea. I have also read that you should bring them into the potty with you so they can see what is supposed to happen and take away any “scary” mystery around it.
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We gave up! My son was not potty trained until 2 days after his 4th birthday. It caused so much anxiety and stress for all involved. I made a bargain with him. We would stop potty training until he turned 4, but he had to start wearing underwear when he was 4. We discussed it alot with him and it felt so good to “give up” trying for a while. He cried a little when I made him wear underwear on his birthday. We had 2 days that he had a few accidents each day and then he was potty trained. Every child is different. Be patient ( I know its hard!)
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Like everything else you have to teach her how to go! Make it fun, potty books in the bathroom, a sticker chart and reward treat for when she goes!! M&Ms work great! I have had an in home daycare for 26 years plus 5 of my own children and I start potty training at 18-20 months and have had most trained in a week. Earlier is better than later.
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I had to personally hold her on the potty and tell her to go pee pee. Started on Sunday and was potty trained by Wed. When she finally did go, I would clap and tell her how proud I was.
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I would take a break for awhile. Then try again with cloth training underwear not pullups, so they can feel what they have done and are uncomfortable. It’s not the most convenient for you but it might help. I had a hard time with my oldest he was almost 4. Good luck
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The Princess and The Potty is a great potty training book! I loved it and my sister did too when we were potty training her.
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She is 3. Maybe she just isn’t ready. Unfortunately this is something you can’t control and trying to do will probably only result in a lot of stress and accidents. Start reading books about the potty. Watch her favorite tv shows that talks about using the potty. Take her to pick out underwear with her favorite characters. Don’t stress it she will get there when she is ready.
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Wait and stop trying to force it, because forcing it is going to make her fight you on it so much worse, even when she is ready.
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My son was the same. We asked him at 3yrs when he was going to use the potty. He said when he was 4. Sure enough, couple months later when he was 4 he stopped wearing diapers and went to potty
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Pick out cute girl underpants that she will like. Get rid of the diaper or pull up during the day. After some time she will not like peeing on herself and she will go potty. That’s what I did with my daughter. She was potty trained in under a week
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I tried to potty train when I thought my daughter was ready and she down right refused. I got rid of diapers refused to buy anymore of them and she wore undies. After a few messes in the undies she potty trained herself
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I agree she’ll do it when shes ready…for my son I put him in undies for 3 days we went no where and even had to potty chair I’m the living room in front of cartoons…also would give him dry erase markers and let him face toilet lid and color all over it
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I took my daughter shopping for Big Girl Panties and a special prize! We made a deal that if she used the potty she could wear the big girl panties. Then if she used the potty for 1 week she would get her prize. She chose Disney princess panties and some flower ones. She wanted to wear them so bad she went potty as soon as we got home. And I let her be in just her new panties the first few days so she could show them off. She loved it! We would all clap and give hugs and kisses when she used the potty! Everyone made a big deal about her big girl panties. And at the end of the week she got her prize… she wanted a glow stick bath. I bought a bunch of glow sticks from the dollar store and some bubble bath and filled the tub with them. She used the potty ever since!
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My advice with 2 daughters, 13 and 7. Just keep taking her to the potty with you when you go. Dont pressure her to use the potty. Lots of books and videos for her to read and watch. Treasure chest reward system; every time she uses the potty she gets to pick a surprise from the treasure chest. Also check with pediatrician make sure there isnt anything painful for her going on.
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Mine too! She’s 2.5 and have done everything. The other morning she woke up with a dry pull up and I said “hey, let’s sit on the potty while you’re watching TV!” She said: “no thank you mom, I’m okay.” WTF.
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My sister put her child in panties and when she went in them she hated the feeling and very quickly learned
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I had a hard one to potty train put some colored Froot Loops in the toilet and ask her if she can pee on them and hit a certain color And if she potties then she gets a treat and a sticker board both also pull ups are a terrible idea they feel too much like a diaper to them
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Ask her why it scares her so bad and work through that. My ex told my son the toilet eats the poop and pee. So my son thought the toilet would eat him
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I told my oldest thst of she wanted to go to the big girl classroom then she needs to go potty. She did and it took her a month. Then I send her to my parents to help her. She did great and no pull ups.
Ugg the struggle is real I have a 3 year old boy he refuses we’ve tried everything we bought him the potty stairs from wal Mart he’s finally trying cuz he likes the stairs and the fact that they are just for him
She will go when she’s ready. When mine were ready the taught themselves. They were 2, 2.5, 3.5
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My oldest didnt train until just a little after turning 4. My second child is the same. He still has accidents at night when hes asleep but for the rest of the time hes perfectly fine and he turned 4 in january.
I feel they need to understand the concept of it and want to stop feeling wet when they go for it to be affective.
My son would come screaming when he was wet. We got him a little potty first then an insert and now he does just fine without either one.
It takes time but they’ll het it eventually.
My daughter was terrified of the big potty. We got her one that looks just like the big one. It was pretty cheap. And one day she just started using it. When that happened we congratulated her and told her she didn’t need the little one anymore. We did have to push her a bit to be ok with it, but once she realized I wasn’t changing my mind she was ok
My Daughter just turned 4 June 2nd! She was great at potty training then got sick and went backwards. Then covid happened and she all the sudden hates the potty! My son was so dam easy and younger
My ex husband tried to force my 3 younger boys. It was the worse thing he could do. I couldn’t get them to use the bathroom without screaming bloody murder or one of them would get Physically sick when he would get so worked up. They ended up being 6,5 and 3 before I could get them trained. One of the many reasons we got divorced.