My daughter saw my bf and I doing the deed. She’s 7 and I’m not sure how much she saw but when I got off him i got on my back and looked at the door and there she was. I put her back to bed she said she was scared and asked if I was ok. What do I say to her?
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Tell her you were play wrestling
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For me that would be a discussion for the talk being brought up, small details of course but I was told at 7. Then again my family things started happening earlier in my family. And I asked a lot of questions if I wasn’t told I wouldn’t find out in other ways.
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Dont tell her anything other than the truth. Put it in words she can understand. Even if it is just “that’s something two adults in a relationship do to show love to each other”. I would not say you were “wrestling” as what happens if some kids suggest wrestling and she thinks that involves being naked? There are too many issues with saying it is anything other than what it is. Lots of kids accidentally see this type of activity but be honest with her.
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Door locks are a wonderful thing.
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You could tell her, in age appropriate terms of course! Not go into a lot of detail about it but maybe like, it’s something adults do when they have very strong feelings for each other.
I have a 7 year old so I personally would say something along those lines.
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Agreed with telling her the truth in a way she would understand.
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It’s about comfort level. Answer the question she asked. Are you ok? Yes. I’m ok. If she has more questions, she’ll ask. Kids are exposed to soo much sooo early. Giving her too much information may confuse or frighten her. Just my 2 cents…
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Oh damn. I’m sorry. This happens a lot. But I really couldn’t help but to laugh.
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Why on earth would you tell a 7yo what you were doing? Yeah, I get it, lying is wrong. But she’s 7. Tell her you were wrestling or playing around.
Oh, & lock your door next time.
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Tell her what you were doing…be honest in tetms she understands .explain that 2 consenting adults have sex when they are in a loving relationship and that you are sorry she saw this and next time you will lock the door.Also explain it can be scary but in your situation it was ok. You were not hurtor scared
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You tell her yes and that you were doing something adults do in private and then answer her questions in an honest yet age appropriate way nothing to be ashamed of and you don’t want to teach her it’s a bad thing but maybe start closing the door
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Time to have the sex talk…age appropriate of course. Never lie. It only confuses kids
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I would directly answer questions without volunteering extra info. She was scared. “I’m sorry you were scared but you don’t need to be” Are you ok? “Yes I am ok, i was not being hurt.” This is one way adults show their love at bedtime.
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Time for “the talk” its awkward i know but it’s best to be honest with them. You don’t want her to be afraid of a healthy sexual relationship when she is older. Good luck mama’s.
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Can’t believe some of the people who comment on here. Accidents happen, I don’t lock my door, it’s unsafe. If something happened, she wouldn’t be able to get to you and it’d take longer for you to run to her - don’t feel bad. Just tell her the truth but softly. Just say well mummy and daddy were having special cuddles just for adults. Shes older enough for sex talk but maybe another time. It’s safer for her to know the basics! Xx
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I wouldn’t tell her you were wrestling for the same explanations as above. I agree with the above commenter, answer what she asked. She asked if you were ok. You’re fine. If she has any other questions, she will ask. You are not required to go into detail about what you were doing. Answer what she asks you in age appropriate terms.
Lesson learned, next time lock the door.
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My son’s therapist told me once (regarding a stressful family matter) that the best way to explain an inappropriate situation, age appropriately is to keep your explanation honest but simple and short. Never divulge more information than is necessary but answer any questions they might have. And as soon as they have no more questions, change the subject- QUICKLY 
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For those of you that think its okay to lie to your child about what’s happening behind closed doors, keep in mind, those kids are the ones left susceptable and vulnerable and so skewed in the truth of things that they won’t come forward if something ever happens to them because they dont know what the truth is. Those are also the kids that end up hiding their sexuality at younger ages because of outside influences and either end up with children while they’re still children or end up in sexual relationships with people they shouldn’t be. Especially older people that so easily influence them because they’ve never been told the truth of things at the right time.
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Just tell her the truth. I mean don’t like give her the full out talk, but just explain to her that what she saw is something only adults who love each other can do with each other.
They’re ALWAYS gonna follow up with , “what were you doing?”. And 7 isnt that young theres a pretty good chance shes heard the word sex before even if she doesnt have the daftest idea what it is.
I’d ask her if shes ever heard the word, and if she says no then explain it’s something that two adults do in private when they love each other very much. You can go on amazon and theres a book for kids about sex and the human body. Also a good time to start teaching her about her own body.
To the people talking about lying leading to abuse, not always, my daughter is almost 4, she walked in on her father and I and is very advanced for four. She obviously started asking questions to which I replied that we were wrestling for the pure fact that she is four and will repeat everything she hears. That being said, I have, from when she was still being changed for diapers, explained to my daughter her private parts and when its inappropriate for someone to touch them, and vice versa, if she touches my boob or area, we go over the “that’s MY private area, you do not touch someone elses private area.” If you approach these things from the start then they wont be easily fooled by viscous adults with horrible intentions. I of course assured her we were okay, but she was four there was no reason for her to hear the full story at that moment.
I also do not lock my door, but I close it all the way and have a child guard on the outside so she cannot open the handle, she can yell from the other side of the door and if I need to I can get to her quickly
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It’s better to be honest with them now before she find out from someone else. My daughter asked at five and then at 8. Tell her what you can that’s age appropriate. She’ll be ok.
First, ask her what she thinks you guys were doing. Kids aren’t dumb. Whatever her response is just go off that.
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Be honest. Tell her what you were doing. And answer her questions.
Kids walk in on their parents all the time- she’ll be fine. Just have a talk with her and answer any questions she has as honestly as possible. My daughter was around that age when she walked in on us and she’s 18 now & not traumatized in the least.
Learn to lock your door
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Oh god, my 11 y.o. walked in on me going down on my husband the other night SMH lmao idk how much she saw cuz we kicked her out real quick since the bed is right next to the door. Finished our deed n when I came out, she was downstairs on her phone. Neither one of us acknowledged what was potentially seen n I left it at that. She already knows what grown ups do alone in their bedrooms. But then again she’s 11. My son has heard us before n has asked WHY DID IT SOUND LIKE HE WAS HURTING YOU Don’t really have advice just know you’re not alone
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The truth?? Making her afraid and confused about sex leads to really bad relationship issues later. And she might resent your bf if she thinks he is actually hurting you and she can tell you’re lying. Kids aren’t stupid, pull out an anatomy book and explain what you were doing and why. She has to explain everything she does to you, show her some respect and reciprocate.
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I would tell her the truth
Time for the talk. Just don’t over divulge.
Unless she asks…I would just let it go…if questiins come up…answer them honestly and on her level.
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Being honest and open is going to be the best possible route. If you start open dialogue with her know she will be more likely to keep that going as she gets older. Let her know that from now on its best if she calls out to you at a certain point from door and if door is closed to knock.
I’d be straight honest without getting into too much details.
Whoops. I always remember to lock my door. It’s like 2nd nature now.
Ask what she saw and if she says something sexual, ask her if she has any questions. Its natural and almost all kids have seen it. Lol i was the same age as her when i walk in on my mom and step dad. I didnt bring it up and i have no clue if they saw me. Just be chill about it. Its no big deal…if she has questions, its better for u to answer them then her go and find answers herself from kids at school or online.
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If she says anything, tell her. If not, then don’t say anything.
Get a lock for your door and use it
My oldest (now 11.5 in 6th grade) came home from school one day in 3rd grade and asked me what a blow job and porn were. He had heard it from older kids on the bus, who were watching porn on a cell. He was already somewhat aware of sex (due to the same reason as OP), so it made it easier. Just saying, nowadays, with internet, TV, accidentally over hearing or seeing, etc most kids are more advanced in that knowledge than we or our parents, etc were at those ages.