You need to look into Respite Care. I took care of a lady of respite care at a local nursing home so her caregivers could have a break once a month.
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You have alot on your plate ,Be patient it will get better ,Pray to God with alot of faith and he will help you.God bless you be strong .Nothing last forever.Being a parent is very hard and challenging .
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As a nurse I think you need to take some time for yourself and your family. Have a look into respite care for a weekend to give yourself and family a break. Then take that weekend and go stay somewhere like a motel/resort and have a weekend away for yourself and recharge. You cannot 100% take care of things if you do not take care of yourself. There are a lot of different organisations out there that can offer some assistance and it does not mean you are a bad parent or person for needing it.
As for your ex, I would suggest having a chat with your lawyer but I wouldnāt want to leave my kids in the care of someone who doesnāt want to partake especially if they have high needs as those needs most likely wonāt get fulfilled.
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I would go back to court. It takes two to tango. Whether your daughters father likes it or not. Donāt settle. This is your mental health and well being
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I dont have a kid with Cerebral palsy but I would let father know your concerns if havent already but it sounds like you have. Putting him back on child support seems like your only option right nowā¦
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Sorry ur going thru this. Exhaustion is a horrible feeling. Iām not sure how, but u definitely need to get help soon before you have a nervous breakdown or something. Iāve had a nervous breakdown due to massive stress from previous relationship and I got to point where everytime I was on my own Iād break down crying (actually wailing), Iād start losing control of my breathing, gasping for air, and Iād be shaking like crazy. Horrible. I was exactly like you, could never ask for or even accept voluntarily offered help most of the time, and thatās where it got me. You gotta get help. I imagine I probably r not in a good headspace to got thru court proceedings about child support right now, so put at the end of ur to do list if necessary. First priority is getting yourself some help so U can return to ur normal functioning self.
F thatā¦ take his ass back to courtā¦ instead of child support going directly in your pocket make the courts mandate he pay for respite careā¦ just because he chooses to be a POS and not acknowledge his āotherā child does NOT let him off the hook for helping take care. And to be honest you should insist as it is your responsibility as well and you taking care of you is how you take care of the two of them. Prayers for you and your family!!!
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Take dad back to court for child support. You need that money to pay for your daughters needs. If he doesnāt want physical help with her care then he can pay for someone else to help you do it.
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Put her father back on child support and use that money to hire a night nurse. Im not saying you need the money to do it but the father needs to help in some wayā¦he doesnāt need the easy way out. I wouldnāt push him to take her bc he could hurt her by accident if he doesnāt know how to properly take care of her.
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Donāt push the ex to see the child. It could end up hurting her. I would however take him in for child support and since she is special needs she needs extra money for care and thatās her whole life. My friend has a verbal autistic child and that child has an IQ under 64. His dad is required to pay half his care for the rest of the childās life.
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File a new motion in family court & at least get child support for both children. You can also outline a new placement plan as well.
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I agree with the resumption of child support - maybe you can go back to court and get the amount increased- meantime maybe you can try another agency to see if they offer some kind of respite care- even if itās only 3-4 hours a week you can try to get some rest or get out and do an activity of some kind - you sound like an awesomely dedicated mom and thereās got to be some extra help out there for you God bless
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Stay strong, you are amazingā¦ But I would say to put the father of your children back on child support, itās not for you, and itās your children rights. I know sometimes we want to provide everything for them by ourselves but thatās selfish. It would take a little bit of pressure out of your shoulders and you can focus on their health and well-being. And congratulations on your husband as well, for what you say you found a good man, Take care of your family, but that means take care of yourself as well, the mother is the strength of the house
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Take him to court!!! Both of your children are equally deserving of love and attention from both parents. As a parent you donāt get to pick and choose the kids you want you love the ones you have for who they are! When I got divorced my ex wanted my daughter only and not my son. After the divorce was finalized he didnāt say a single word not even a birthday card for 4 years I terminated his rights and he didnāt even respond to the court. He now lives 5 hours away (much closer then before) and didnāt even bother then I found him sitting out side of my house at 3am a couple weeks ago!!! You are doing a great job! Keep your head up and stay strong!! Please talk to a counselor it helped me when I was dealing with a similar situation to get some outside perspective and someone who isnāt going to judge me or my feelings and please seek legal counsel for your kids sake they deserve to be treated equally by both parents!
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Definitely put him back in support. Thatās his child. But donāt push for him to be more involved with your daughter. He obviously doesnāt care and could end up treating her badly. I wish i had some great advice for help for you. You sound like you need a vacation
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Put him back on child support!! And Iāve been a cna for 8 years and did home care! Iāve never heard of no back up nurses! I would look into a different company and also ask questions like that! My cousin has cp but she is able to walk and had two kids her parents worked very hard with her in therapy she also had several surgeries!! Not saying you didnāt do enough or anything like that! I know there are different levels of cp!! I would ask him for help if he refuses go to court and have them look at his income and let them decide how much to pay Bc itāll be more than 100$!!! If you are exhausted and canāt take care of yourself you then canāt take care of your children properly!!! Itās very hard being a caretaker!!! You need to get the fathers ass to be responsible and have him pay through court and you need to look into other homecare businesses!!!
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Your x should be paying child support for both children. Prayers for your health.
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First of all, you and your husband are amazing!! Second, I would get back your child support. I would even have the amount reviewed by the courts. The reason I say this is you might be able to use that extra support for 1 or 2 nights of private nursing care. I know you said you have an agency but a private caregiver may be more reliable. I wish I lived closer, Iād be happy to give you one night per week as I am a nurse. God bless you and your family.
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If you lived by me, I would help! Itās my passionā¤ļø you are doing great and definitely take him to court and get everything you can out of it!
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As a parent you must step up !!! Take him back to court and see what you can get $$$$ā¦ if you can get some money for her you can hire privately a nurse do get a night or 2 rest ā¦or even a Saturday or Sunday break !!!
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Put him back on child support. Who cares if he bitches about it. Sheās special needs and will need the extra money for care.
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I wouldnāt let him off the hook with child support and I would seek an attorney about his lack of with his daughter.
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God bless you, your daughter and your family. First I would start to look for more reliable agency nursing even if I had to switch companies. If they canāt provide reasonable, reliable care I would report them to the BBB there is a standard of care the agency must meet and they need to within reason be capable of having a backup plan for call offs. Keep record of each call off with no relief coverage so you have proof/ hours/ days etc. Also, have you looked into respite care?? What type of care is needed does she require? Is a nurse necessary or is a CNA able to provide the care? Ask to father to pitch in and if he says no take him back to court for the child support. You need a break!!
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Really $100 a month is nothing! He should be asking about his daughter and visiting her at the very least. It sounds like you need more coverage and some respite care.
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Praying for God to soften his heart! Praying for strength for you and your husband! Check with your church for volunteers to give you a break. Life is not fair but letting him off the hook for child support is just giving him a free ride.
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Go back and get him to start paying child support. Use that money to find more dependable nighttime care or more back up options you can pay out of pocket for. No one can force him to take or parent her but they can force him to financially support her
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He needs to pay child supportā¦ if he does then u could hire someone to come in an pay them on yr ownā¦ if it was only 15 to 20 hrs a week that will still help you!
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Get you child support back more funds for you to take care your precious children
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Ugh! Firstā¦ Get your child support, itās not for you itās for the kids! File for a modification of custody hearing (no you donāt need an attorney) and tell this to the judge. Child support is also calculated on how much time he spends with the kids. If he doesnāt want to pay as much, heāll need to follow through with his visits. He needs to be there for both of them and you need to put his feet under the fire a little. Itās not about you or him, itās about the kids. So whatever he complains about, he can go suck a toe or step up! Drives me nuts when women are likeā¦ I donāt need child support. YOU may not, but your KIDS do! ANDā¦ heās legally responsible for half of your childās medical care so get that too! Buck up mama and fight for what your kids NEED!
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Aw, I know how frustrating it can be. I do home health and my family I work for have hard time with reliable people. It can be so hard on families. Have you checked with other agencies to see if others would help staff your house?
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I work for an agency and we do send out fill inās when an employee calls out. Reach out to a Visiting Angels in your area and they should be able to relieve some of that pressure. Even if you just use them as a backup for when the current agency canāt send someone. I hope this helps. I have seen how this kind of stress takes a toll on the bodyā¦ Dont be afraid to ask for help from friends and familyā¦ " You cant pour from an empty cup"- take care of yourself
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He complained about the money and you did that for himā¦you are complaining (I donāt mean that in a bad way!) to him about needing help and what is he doing for you??? Shows his true characterā¦ the CHILDREN deserve child supportā¦take him back to court. With The extra money you could maybe get a night nurse at least part time!!..please donāt forget to take care of yourself too
As stressed out as you are right now i feel like pushing for child support would be more of a mental strain on you at this point. Its his loss if he doesnt want to spend time with your daughter as sad as that is. What I would do though is look into a different company for coming and caring for your daughter. I dont understand why they wouldnāt have an as needed nurse in case someone calls in. You could call your daughters insurance company im sure to get a list of covered home health agencies. Hang in there momma youāre doing a great job.
I would think about looking into a second agency for the night time. Maybe speak with a caseworker to help. Being a caregiver myself I know how often people just donāt show. Iām so sorry that this is all on your shoulders. I would think about revisiting court to get some kind of help from the father. Good luck.
If your ex cannot spend time with both children, he shouldnāt be seeing one period. Your ex should be paying childsupport for both children. He should not only be paying childsupport but also half of all her medical care including nurses. Continuous prayers for you and your family to get help and be happy and positive
As a single mom of a special needs 29 year old daughter without help I say stay strong. When you have those moments of help take time for yourself. Take a bath go see a movie a walk in the park a massage. Anything to get a little break. My baby girl is turning 30 in October. Her father walked out when she was born. I feel your pain. Lean on your loved ones and take help whenever offered by family and friends. Praying for you and definitely get that child support back!
Itās easy for others to say what to do in this situation. First, your children will only be as well as you are. Meaning, despite your exās complaining about child support , your daughter has a higher level of need especially financial need. He can complain all he wants. Giving him relief is not doing you or her justice. The demand is high and he should feel that. Do it for her, not him. Also , there was mention of respite in earlier comments. That does exist. There are local resources in each commity that serve individuals with special needs . Look for non profit agencies in your area that service kids with special needs. There are programs and people that provide help and breaks. Hang in there.
My advice. Honestly. Put the ex on child support and insist that he take both children. Period. It might be difficult for them both in the beginning. This has been difficult for you,your parents and your husbandā¦ you deserve to breathe and your daughter deserves a relationship with her father- one like that of he and her sister but different bc needs to get to know her.
I am a single Mom to a 10 yr Old with CP her father was not in her life after 3 yrs of age. I struggle daily but I understand your feelings of struggle and at times confusion. I do therapy I garden and I do meditation. I love my child as its evident you do as well. I know this is hard to hear but you are not going to receive acknowledgement from her Dad. That was a hard pill for me to swallow. Reach out to advocates through her school and the community. I know how frazzled you can become and just need peace. The hardest thing to do about not getting help is to not ask for it.
I would have to agree with what manybother ladies here have said. Put the ex back on child support, doesnāt matter whether he wants to actively help or not, or be a part of your childrenās life for that matter. It also doesnāt matter whether he complains. Consider all of the hard work and effort you and your husband are putting in. If you can power through all of that, the very least he can do is sit on his butt and help support your children. With that, like other said, you can put it towards hiring someone to come help so you can get your well deserved nights rest! Beat of luck to you, youāre in my thoughts. 
You have quite a bit on your plate. Counseling will be great because they may be able to help support you with other resources you didnāt know were available. It sounds like you donāt even have time to think outside the box for new ideas. Do you go to a church or have any links to groups that may be able to help. You are also having to shoulder all these family dynamics like the child that doesnāt get acknowledged. How are you doing with the basicsā¦sleep? healthy eating? exercise? staying hydrated? Good luck to you guys. Keep plugging alongāthis too shall passā(one day)ā¦
Take kids father back to court get child support let him complain All he wants as long as he pays . he needs to man up . also explain in court how he does not help with his childs health needs and needs to help cover nurse need . also complain to insurance about getting help with night help and how this agency is failing to met your needs. Its great that step dad helps but its also fair for him to want to work ft. The childs father needs to step up and be a man.
I grew up with a special needs brother who had cerebral palsy and more. My mom went private because the nursing through the agency has limitations. If you go private you would be interviewing and hiring on your own BUT it means your nurses only work for your daughter so the hours can be adjusted accordingly for her needs. 2/3 hired allowing for vacations/days off/sick days. It has downs (no insurance so the nurses MUST put money that would be taken out for taxes so they have the cash to pay for taxes at the end of the year) but in the long run you get the care for your child and everyone is able to get enough rest or even just enjoy time together without being so tired. Just an idea 
good luck and bless you for loving that precious little girl 
Find a different nursing company, first of all. If your nurses are calling off all the time, donāt keep giving them money. ( I understand that its SSI giving them money, but all in all, thatās your money. Youāve paid into it, your community has paid into to ensure that this child and you have the support you need to make her quality of life as great as possible.) Idk what state youāre in, but you need to get an advocate. Check with your local intermediate unit for guidance in what services you are able to get to lighten your load. All in all, its best for your daughter too. She needs people other than you in her life so that she can grow and both of you need to know that she has other people to depend on if you are not able to be right there.
Wish I was closer Iām a disability support worker but u mumma are kickass. U have the world on ur shoulders and keep going and I applause for you that.i hope u can find some respite n a great support worker for your daughter. Are you with ndis?
If henisnt helping put him back on CS
I help w special needs families
That money u adent concerned with along w extra for medical dependent money could ABSOLUTELY pay for a 3rd party to help out
Check out respite care as wellā¦ ithwlps w more than just the kiddo ā¦ including the parents that need a break
Omg hun I am so sorry you are going through this. Being a caretaker like that is beyond hard. First off I want to tell you that you are an amazing mom for never giving up! My suggestion would be look for support groups in your area, they will have the most resources to help you through this hard time. Are there any other agencies you could hire?
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You need to try and fit time in to take care of yourself 30min a day. You canāt take care of everything and everyone else if you donāt take care of you. Self care is important. Pray, Go for a walk write in a journal take a shower so your nailsā¦set aside the time. Believe me I know itās easier said than done but youāre health physically spiritually and mentally is important.
how tough. I think counseling may bring out more options. Whenever I do group. I get so many ideas. It seems like you have to know now. But you donāt. there are still so many options. Prayers for you.
You canāt make someone have a willing heart. I really canāt understand why you took him off child support. They could order him to help pay for the extra care. Just because he complained?? The additional funds can supplement any extra you have to pay when someone calls out. I pray that things get better for all of you. 
I would absolutely take him to court and make him pay MORE child support, not less. He is responsible for her too, whether he likes it or not, and he should be helping with the expenses, especially given that she has special needs.
The one thing I would NOT do is force him to spend time with her or personally help with her healthcare. If he is already dismissive of her and her care then making him be involved could resort in her being neglected or even abused
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First things first!!! You need to get him back on child support. You actually made his life easier and yours harder. After that get more help. With extra money you will be able to get an extra pair of hands to help. All the best. Hugs
Maybe splurge for a night time sitter with the extra funds. Often older people even retired will do night shift work to go through the night so others can rest prayers you have a heavy cross to bear I pray you have a church family to support you emotionallyā:heart:
Take the sperm donor back to court. NEVER NEVER NEVER LET a deadbeat (even if itās only 50/50 but itās 0% towards one so that washes!)no have financiaal responsibility for what he helped create. Perhaps with that $ you can hire a part time helper. And the father is responsible for half the medical care, which may also be covered by that hire extra help.
Take his asss back to court and demand decent child support! As far as custody I have no advice cuz if he cant acknowledged all of the kids you have Iād be like you arent seeing any of them.
Mom I feel for you and I would totally help youš Iām sorry you and your husband are exhausted. Idk if you can find a different agency ??
Your an amazing mom. Please donāt use respite care right now. Nursing homes are a hot bed for Covid. Call an agency or place an ad for a private duty aide. Take her father back for child support and make him off set the costs. You and your husband and other child deserve a break once in awhile. Your other child also deserves a happy mom. Give your a break. Your allowed.
Unfortunately going back to court and trying to get money isnāt as easy as it sounds. Iāve known ppl to run off and disappear (left when kid was 5, kid is now in her 20s and they still have not found him or received a dime-didnt help at all taking back to court and the mother said it wasted her time, money, and much of her energy). Talking with the ex and getting some options to see if he can help in some way, whether physical or monetary, is a start. He may not be willing to take and use his visitation and we donāt know all the details of their court order/state laws. Maybe list some other options than just nailing him in court. That process alone is extremely stressful, as well as time consuming, and she is already super stressed. Plus, it may not always work they way it should. Does anyone know of organizations that might help?
Definitely start agency shopping and ask specifically about their replacement for call off plan. Go to court and get your ex to pay for the medical costs your daughter is better off not having him around if he wonāt love her like heās supposed to. Also you need to find someone to give you an hourās break. A friend or family member giving you an hour out of the house even if itās for a nap in your car will do wonders for your mental, emotional and physical health
your a strong mommy! Also, just so you know youāre not alone in losing your mind with the dish soap thing Iāve did it before. Youāre tired and itās understandable. In my opinion I would not have taken him off child support. And he should be getting them both. Iām not familiar with her disorder however I can imagine how tired and run down you must feel. As her dad he should educate himself on how to take care of her and step up.
1st things first , they are both his children too , so he should be paying child support for both and helping out with medical cost for your daughters care ā¦ God Bless your current husband for stepping up and help with your daughters care ā¦
Take his ass to court! If he doesnt want to physically and emotionally help with a child he helped create he damn well better help financially take care of her. And $100 a month for a child with special needs and nursing needs is a slap in the face! Did the court think that he was going to be having her 50% of the time when they decided that was a fair amount? I wouldnāt want my other child with him if he has that type of character to walk out on his other child like she doesnt matter. The nursing staff your working with is either lying or not a reputable company. There is no way they dont have PRN staff.
#1, you have to take care of yourself! Go to counseling and consider all options. Even doing nothing is an option if thatās what you choose. Your ex needs to be helping either monetarily or physically. Donāt let him off the hook! Look into respite care or a daycare for children with special needs. Talk with the pediatrician and reach out to a childrenās hospital for suggestions. There may be activities in your area which are good for your child and will give you a break. You canāt do it all yourself, no one could, so donāt be afraid to reach out and ask for help!
I went through this as a single mom. 25 years later and i still do it all by myselfā¦ never even had a nurse. Itās Dadās loss. Thereās nothing you can do to make him help you. Hugs to you!
Put his ass back on child support (if you get $ awesome, if not, it will eventually add upā¦look at it as a savings acct) also get his ass to help with health care, pay for nurses, etc. He may not want to be a part of her life and sadly itās his choice. But doesnt mean he gets rid of his responsibility!!! Make him at least help pay for care!
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Sounds like you do have to go back to court for more support from your ex and if he isnāt willing they will put him in jail. Iām sorry itās not easy taking care of children and no matter what you will need help specially one with special needs. He should start having her more itās not fair to her she doesnāt completely understand but she knows whatās going on
Unfortunately the fact is he doesnāt want to, you have to deal, you donāt want the kids exposed to anyone who doesnāt want them. I absolutely agree that child support is about all he is good for.
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Iām not going to comment about the father. But I am going to say that you need to take care of yourself, too. I have been a single Mother, and I have been raising my 16 yr old autistic grandson, since he was only 9 months. It gets hard at times. You get overtired, then feel guilty because you get grumpy. You always worry. Am I enough? You are enough, but sometimes you need a break. Find a way to get that break. So you can recharge, emotionally, and physically.
So you asked:
Depending on what state you live in can determine which benefits your child may receive. Check that out!
Take dude back to court! He IS RESPONSIBLE for 1/2 of all costs related to the childs needs not covered by insurance. Keep your receipts!
If he is only paying a $100.00/month for 2 kids does he not have a good job? Hiding money from you? Either way he needs to get a 2nd job to help out more.
He absolutely needs to take both kids with him when he picks up the other child. If you are concerned about safety. Check out the environment and review the details of care with him.
He helped make them now he helps care for them.
Grow a spine and stand up to him for your kids. In order for you to be best you need rest! He helps!
If doesnāt have any interest in her, I would force it. He clearly would not take good care of her and youād still be up worried about her safety.
But I would put him back on child support. He helped bring her into this world and if he wont step up and be present than he needs to pay so it can get more help.
I know this is gonna sound Cold hearted but I would think about putting him on a Nursing home either part time or full time, I know from experience you have to take care of you first and the rest of your family, Again not trying to sound cold heartedā¦
I am so sorry. You have your hands full. Take him back to court. Refile for child support. Let the cout decide on the amount. It is usually based on a formula. I like what someone said above you cant pour from an empty cup. You need to carve out some you time even for an hour on a regular basis even if u just go out for a cup of coffee. Have a trusted friend or family member which the kids. A good therapist can help immensely.
I too have two children with my ex who absolutely does nothing for them. My youngest has a disability in which causes him to be completely ignored by his father. He asks about my daughter all the time but she doesnāt like him because he ignores her brother. My advice is donāt force your precious daughter on him and my other advice is to take his ass back to court and tell him to quit crying over $100 a month. If heās not gonna take responsibility, be a man and support his children he can get over it and stop being a crybaby. His life is not hard over a $100. But also most importantly please look into respite care. Take care of yourself, please. I am a CNA and there shouldnāt be no back up nurses for night time. Look into a different company or at least speak to someone about how the nurse always calls in, thatās not okay. It may be their job that they can call into, but this is your life! You donāt get to call in and not show up. I know that itās been rough with the COVID and the homeschooling. Itās been sleep altering and mind/soul changing but itāll get better. I wish you and your family the best. I hope you guys get some well deserved rest. Please be strong
Keep your child support even if not needed. if heās not accountable physically then at least take him to be accountable monetarily. It is his kids too and if you donāt need it you can put it up for the kids.
Iām sorry but I would not be allowing him to be around one child but not the other. That is so very sad for your daughter. She does have feelings and should never be treated that way or allowed to be treated that wayā¦ Iād say cut him off completely. Especially if a lil $100 a month he conplains about. You and BOTH of your children deserve so much better.
I can only say what I would hope Iād do in your situation. Talk to an attorney, possibly get a child liaison if the attorney feels itāll help. Also, counseling and group therapy for your mental health.
- You rock!
- Your ex is a pos and he should be paying child support. However, Iām sensing that while it annoys you, itās not worth it to you. If you would rather do without then dont bother going to court.
- What it sounds like to me is you are looking for advise on help. How about a combination of both what you have and private. Can you look to hire a helper a few nights/days per week? Help with the cooking, cleaning, kids a few times per week - when the nurses arenāt there. Instead of having your husband work part time the money can go to paying this person. Hey even start making the dad pay up his $100 to help pay for it
. - I know your parents help and after everything settled you can maybe ask them for a weekend with your special needs child while your son visits with his father. Go on a little getaway, sleep in, day drink
dinner, time out of the house. Recharge those batteries 
I hope you can find a solution to your problems soon.
Just know you arenāt alone. My child doesnāt have c.p but I have 4 kiddos & 1 is high functioning autistic the other high level adhd. My other kids have told me the same I feel so bad but I just try my best. Thatās all we can do. Is try & stay strong. Maybe the counseling can find your family some help?!?! Some have resources. Have you tried respite care??
Your ex needs to be paying child support. Was the amount decided on based if he has both kids 50/50. Iād be spiteful and take him for more. Dont let him off the hook because he never has her. If anything, heād be paying for all her medical.
Check to see if Bayada Pediatrics has an office near you. I worked for them and they are a good company. I pray that things get better for you and you can find the help that you need and deserve!
You should not have taken him off of child support, if anything he should be paying 200 per child. If he takes care of the 10 yr old. Then great but if he doesnāt pay attention to the disabled child at all the least he can do is help financially. Whether he like it or not he is the father. And need to take responsibility for her
I think for one get a med that help with your stress. Been there. My son isnāt as disabled as yours but he has down syndrome. When he was little he was so hyper and you had to watch him every second. I had 2 kids also and his dad ignores them both. He never even talks to them on fb. We had respite care through school where they would babysit free for a few hours so i could grocery shop in peace or just have some alone time with my daughter.
You are giving it all you got and heās giving zero. Put his butt back on child support and have it reevaluated. 100$ a month and he takes her zero?! Ummm something is wrong there. Even if heās keeping your son 50/50. But honestly you canāt make someone ādoā what they are supposed to. But donāt give him the satisfaction of checking out physically and financially. He canāt cry all he wants. But you are the one hurting in literally every endā¦ Especially when itās costing you mentally.
I would keep him on child support for both children $100 is to little for 2 kids. Also I would not let the other child go with the father if he doesnāt take them BOTH at the same time, because theyāre BOTH his kids and that way you can have a break. Momās need breaks too.
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I donāt have any real advice. I will say you are so so strong. I wish you the best sending lov and light
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What a sore excuse of a person to deny acknowledgement of one child over another. I honestly canāt believe people like that exist. I think I would be less mad if he didnāt want anything to do with both kids as opposed to 1 out of the 2. Wow. I donāt have much advice. Because my answer would be to take him to court for more child support and you suck it up when it comes to him whining about paying child support. At least with that child support you can maybe hire an independent worker for the later help.
Definitely get the other parent to pay child support. And $100 is not enough, he should be paying more for both his kids. Tell him he needs to take notice of his other child not just the one.
Make him pay child support even if you donāt need it you can always put it into accounts for your kids for when their older Personally I would not allow him to play favorites he either wants to see all the kids or sees none I would take him to court
I have a daughter with cp and she is 30 now. I know it takes alot but hang in there. Thatās a shame about her father. My suggestion is change providers or push the issue. All agencies have back ups.
I agree with Katrina Teeter and Laurie as well. I have been there with not being able to pour from an empty cup! Luckily, my sons have a Awesome Aunt (ex husbands sister) and Uncle who helped me when that cup was empty and breaking!
God bless you. Youāre a strong woman. I had twins plus two other ones and nursing round the clock and I had help during the day and being deprived of sleep is HORRIBLE. Take him to court and fight for him to pay. 100 dollars a month ? What a joke. Poor excuse of a man.
Dad needs to step up. Pay child support and take his daughter too. If he cant do that then he needs to not see either child. Its not fair for one to go but not the other. And believe she does notice.
If nothing else, you need to at least put him on child support. 25% of his check is nothing compared to being a full time mother with no help. He can suck it up
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First of all put the fathers ass back on child support! If he isnāt going to bother seeing her he might as well put his money to her! I would try to get awarded medical insurance also if his is better than yours and life insurance for the kids if he dies and vision dental and orthodontic insurance! There is nothing you can do to force him to see her or love her! There is a school that my friends child goes to every week day until age 22.
It is his responsibility to pay child support to help cover care for your child. Go through the child support agency or courts to get it back. And then find someone that can be paid (by you with the extra support) to come help once a week at least and/or possibly when the nurses cancel. Take care of yourself to, get sleep/rest and breaks so you can be the best mama you can be to both of your beautiful children. You are an amazing mom already, keep your chin up and fight for your rights and what is best for your entire family.
Or have him totally surrender parental rights. Take his name off of the birth certificate of both. Hit low he plays dirty
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Go back to court and have him pay the child support heās required to pay based on his actual parenting time- you donāt even need an attorney for that! Then use that extra money to pay for private care outside of the agency for the night hours you need!
It sucksā¦ I know the feelingā¦ Just be the best mom you can be for your children! Xoxo to you!
I would never have taken him off child support. Iād see what I can do to get back on it. Itās the absolute least he can do considering he doesnāt even acknowledge his daughter.
Thereās a special place in hell for him to turn his back on his kid who has CP. I absolutely wouldnāt let him take the other kid until he acknowledged BOTH of his children. What a disgrace.
Alsoā¦look into just even a sitter for the night (not necessarily a nurse) ā¦can wake you for any nursing duties but can maybe get you more sleep