Is it wrong of my to get my daughter an Iphone for Christmas? I will not be with her for Christmas, she will be with her mom and I will be overseas…I want to be able to facetime her and she has been wanting a phone and I want to give it to her for Christmas…her mom said it isnt fair to her siblings (not mine) if she opens something so expensive and they dont have the same thing…i disagree…she is 14 and they are toddlers…help me out here
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The fact that you’ll be overseas and want to FaceTime with her sounds really nice.
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The toddlers will get phones when their older shes old enough for one and its also a purpose gift i wouldn’t have a issue with my kids dad doing this the ex wife just sounds bitter to me and jelouse
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That’s wrong on mum’s part. It isn’t your fault you’re able to provide what the other dad can’t.
She’s 14 also so is old enough now and is her choice if wants more contact with you
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My son (12) has had an iPhone since he was 8 years old. He now has a iPhone 12. Get your kid what you wish. And the fact that your overseas is even more of a reason so y’all can FaceTime
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Get your daughter whatever you want.
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IMO, You’re not responsible for what her other sibling do or do not receive. I understand why her mom would be concerned, but that’s not for you to make it up or take away from your own for their situation.
The real question is whether or not you as parents agree on your child to have a phone.
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You’re in the right in wanting to get her a phone and any phone you choose. At the same time it seems like you are trying to coparent decently and respect her opinion to keep the peace. I would try talking to her and maybe she might be ok w a less expensive phone. If they have wifi maybe a tablet or phone with out service but usable by wifi temporarily. The siblings are toddlers but when they get older they’ll hear that your daughter got an extremely expensive gift at 14 and may think that they will get the same thing. Also, teenagers can in trouble with something like that quickly even if she’s not that kind of kid. Young minds can be naive to stuff and it can get out of control w out notice. I bet if you and mom got together y’all could compromise on something. Discuss a trial period and rules you can both agree on. Idk if parental controls can be a universal platform between Android and apple so that the two of you can both monitor the phone at the same time. A phone is a big step especially a first one at such an impressionable age. One person mentioned if you just go ahead and do it she may take it away while she’s w your ex. Technically you have every right but I’d try to come to a common place on it so everyone is happy vs creating a negative situation.
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It’s not right on moms part. But I wouldn’t waste the money knowing mom probably won’t let her use it.
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Most definitely ok to gift your daughter whatever you seem fit. She’s older and should definitely have a phone to be able to communicate with you while your away… My oldest has a iPhone my youngest has no phone he’s 6… and believe me there’s no issues about it
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Aw…that’s awesome Dad. Just give your daughter her phone in person before you leave.
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I’m with u on this one . Sounds like a great idea. 14 is about the age and u can facetime your daughter
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Def yes. And get her a newer one… it will make it so much easier.
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The toddlers aren’t going to be aware the phone is expensive, it shouldn’t matter
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Your ex wife is selfish! Toddlers won’t even know the difference and she’s your daughter to seems like mom just doesn’t want to be one upped
My opinion why does a 14 year old need a phone in the 1st place ? I understand you want to FaceTime her but if her mother has a telephone I don’t understand why you just can’t FaceTime her on her mother’s phone and if she doesn’t have an iPhone and she has an Android I don’t know why you can’t just Duo call her on the Android ? Which is pretty much the same thing as FaceTime on an Android
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Give it to her in person either before or after Christmas.
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Your Ex can get over it. Its a very good idea so you can stay in touch with her.
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You’re her dad you can buy your daughter whatever you want. Tell your ex to get over it.
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I think the age difference makes it a no Brainerd and also a way to stay in touch with dad. Moms just being rude and difficult.
Wow wtf. I’m pretty sure your daughter is old enough to have a phone and it’s not like her toddlers will know the difference price wise
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It’s a little selfish of your ex wife. When my daughter’s dad was going overseas she was 5 and I bought her an iPad to ensure she could Keep in touch with him and wouldn’t miss a call from him if I was busy on my phone. Having that open communication between the 2 helped reassure my daughter during the days she was having a harder time. It’s not about your ex wife’s feelings but about your daughter. Your job is to provide for your child. Get her the phone, it’s so important for you to be able to communicate with each other.
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You win…I try to teach my kids to not care what everyone else has. As long as she knows the safety precautions and abides by them, there’s no reason she shouldn’t be able to have it.
Just tell her that it’s fair that your daughter has a way to contact you especially if you aren’t just a short drive away, I’m sure your daughter would like her own privacy when talking to you and such
Give her the phone tell her mum to pull her head in .
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Buy your child whatever you want. Her other children are not your responsibility.
Give her the phone so you can chat with her
Your ex needs to get tf over herself🤷🏻♀️
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Please get her whatever YOU want. YOU are her Dad.
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The toddlers won’t know the value of an iphone.
Possibly the mam can’t afford auch an expensive gift and worries you’ll outdo her. It might make her feel inadequate.
If you get on well talk to her.
Maybe you could gift it between you if that’s the issue. No competition just good co parenting. The gift is for your child shouldn’t really matter where it comes from.
If it’s really just about the phone and the siblings then politely tell her that the other children are not your concern.
It’s quite common for people parenting alone to feel like they are not doing as good by their kids as the non custodial parent
Toddlers don’t need phones but it’s crazy she don’t want you buying her expensive gifts don’t the other kids have fathers ? They can buy their children something SHE SOUNDS BITTER TO ME
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Your child it’s up to you what you buy her . It’s not your responsibility for what the others get or don’t get .
A 14 year old girl definitely needs a phone. The younger children will get a phone when they are older.
Toddlers and a 14 year old…no question…get the phone! Toddlers have no concept of $!
She’s being unreasonable!
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I would get your daughter the phone. The other kids aren’t your problem and your daughter shouldn’t have to do without what she wants just because the ex and her new man can’t afford stuff for their kids. Buy the phone your ex is being selfish.
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That is absolutely an age appropriate gift and one that I’m sure she will love. You are her parent and have every right to give her the gift of your choice. So buy it and enjoy your FaceTime!!
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I definitely feel a 14 year old is old enough to have one. Your ex needs to stop being so sensitive and explain to her other kids that she’s more mature than they are and life isn’t fair (not those exact words but you get my drift). You are allowed to gift your child whatever you feel is necessary and the fact that mom STILL wants to be a control freak is annoying. My oldest is 11 and has his own phone so his dad can call/text him when he wants without going through me.
Get her the phone and your ex can get over it. She isn’t paying for it.
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Get that girl the phone!!
& Merry Christmas 
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Toddlers don’t know the value of a brand of phone. Their mother does. Toddlers don’t need phones. Teens do. Get her the phone.
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You win. Just because she has other kids that are not yours doesn’t mean that’s your problem.
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She’s on a power trip. Toddlers won’t have any idea on the cost of that phone. She’s 14. Get her the phone. She’s your daughter. It’s not up to mom.
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She’s wrong you’re right. Get your teenage daughter that iPhone 
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Awww you’re awesome for wanting to stay in touch with her while being overseas!!! I’d do it.
I’m laughing at the fact your ex wife sounds like an idiot because your daughters other siblings are toddlers 
I guess I should take my 9 year old stepsons Xbox and iPad away from him since my 2 and 3 year old don’t have them lol
Get it for her. You’re ex is in her feelings and not thinking about her daughter
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I would if I were in your situation. Having a relationship with your child is important and it’s not an unreasonable thing for a kid in her age group to have.
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I would get it for her still the other kids aren’t your kids not much you can do about them??
I think it’s fine. She’s 14 and you have a very good reason for wanting too. Fuck I wish my kids dad wanted to FaceTime his kids she should be happy you put in so much time effort and money. Especially if her other kids are toddlers. Like come on she just sounds salty that you want to get her such a nice gift. She needs to put her ego away and let you have a relationship with your daughter 
Um. I was right there thinking I can understand it being unfair until you said “toddlers”.
This sounds more like her being jealous she isn’t giving the daughter the phone.
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I don’t see a problem with it. There would only be a problem if say the toddlers were older and had enough understanding to feel left out. They’ll be fine in this case. 14 is old enough for a phone.
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If it’s an ex wife, she has no rights telling you what you can and can not buy for your daughter. Get her the phone. You have an extremely good reason for wanting her to have one. Do you!!
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It’s your child and she is 14. It’s totally appropriate to buy her that phone. Her other children are toddlers they won’t care as long as they get gifts that are age appropriate from their mother. She sounds jealous and immature. Contact a friend or another relative to give the phone to her. I understand the younger children aren’t yours but buy them play phones and let your daughter give them to her siblings so they feel included. Maybe that would suffice their mother.
You were not wrong. She is. Gifts should be age appropriate ava it should never be about the price of the gift. If you want to get her a phone, clearly your paying for it, so it will not impact the mother’s life one bit. She’s being unreasonable.
Definitely side with you! I think her reasoning has nothing to do with what she says it does.
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Yeah, the toddlers won’t know or even understand. Give her the phone, it’s for good reason!! I just hope if you do get it for her, she doesn’t take it away so you can’t reach out of spite.
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As long as phone can be monitored to ensure she’s using it for the purpose only then I don’t see a problem. Mom may set times or limits on technology as it her home and as she ages check for boys bad influence etc…
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Sounds like ex-wife is being petty. Those babies have no idea what things cost. Seems like ex is trying to get you to get them all phones! Shame on her for trying to block communication between you and your daughter!
YOU are her dad and have the right to get her whatever you feel fit for her Christmas present. Her siblings are toddlers and have no idea of the $ value of the phone. Please do not listen to your ex and get her the phone so you can facetime!
My ex and I share a twelve-year-old son. His dad recently purchased him a phone for about a $150 hes had it for maybe 2 or 3 months. Hes asking his dad for an iPhone for Christmas that costs more than $800. I told his dad I think it’s a waste of money and he shouldn’t buy him the phone. However If he wants to buy the iPhone it’s not my place to say that he can’t. I gave my opinion and that’s all it is… my opinion. I think he will end up getting him a computer but at the end of the day unless it’s unsafe… she doesn’t get to say you can’t.
At 14 give her the phone. For the toddlers you could get them inexpensive tablets( around $60 each).
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Shes wrong… your daughter is old enough and needs a phone and if she feels some way about the younger kids she can get them a tablet.
You can give it to her before you leave and let her know it is for Christmas too. That way other kids shouldn’t be as hurt. They are toddlers, they will get over it. The mom, maybe.
It’s an age appropriate gift for your daughter. If you ex doesn’t want her to open it on Christmas then give it to your daughter before If your able to do that before your leave starts. You should be able to talk with your daughter on Christmas.
Ummm since when do older kids not get age appropriate gifts because they have toddler siblings? Also. This is an excuse 
I’m sorry!
14 is definitely old enough to have a phone. And she doesn’t have to open it in front of the others. You have every right to get her a phone.
I mean I do the whole what one gets they all get but all my kids are toddlers. Your daughter is old enough for a phone and mom is just going to have to understand that.
Please get her the phone. Also with everything happening in this word she should definitely have a phone at that age in case of an emergency.
Please get your baby that phone so you can talk to her. She is going to miss you so much, it would mean a lot to her.
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Maybe ask your ex wife if she would like to pay half for it that way it’ll make it easier for her to monitor what your daughter is doing with the phone…
Sounds like she doesn’t want to be outdone. Using other kids as an excuse.
Get her the phone .she is old enough .ex sounds petty just remind her she’s your daughter too
Are you also paying the phone bill? Nothing worse than a “fun” parent giving the other an extra bill to take care of. If your footing the bills all around I’d say give your child the present you want to. It’s not your problem what your ex does for her kids
Sounds like a control thing with mom. Its a shame toddlers have no sense of money.
On your side. She’s trying to be controlling. Do it and if you do please add a protective case and screen!!!
Get her the phone and communicate with mom that she can help monitor her use and can take it away if she needs to
If she wants to be like that give it to her in private and tell her to keep it put up. You shouldn’t have to fight to talk to your kid.
The toddlers aren’t your concern and neither is what they may or may not get.
Get the toddlers play phones to open from their sister while your daughter opens her present from you.
He should be able to get his daughter whenever he wants
You’re not wrong get her an iPhone if that’s what you want to get her
I get her one you have right too
If you pay the bill I feel an iPhone is an appropriate gift.
Give it to her. It’s not your ex-wife’s choice.
I think you should give it to her
Saw the same exact post on here but the mom posted the question I guess it’s a universal issue this year 
Not wrong at all. Totally reasonable and understandable.
Get the phone but also make sure your ex doesn’t take it from her
Your gift is reasonable & for good reasons. I also understand mom’s POV. If grandma was getting 1 child an iphone everyone would be crying she needs to be equal to the others even if they’re not her grandkids & different ages.
The way I see this it can be handled 2 different ways. Mom can buy your daughter less giving her money to spend on the other kids to make it more equal. Or you can step up & help her keep the peace by buying her other kids tablets or something similar. Kid fires will probably go on sale black Friday. That would be a kind gesture to the whole family. Kids shouldn’t have to go with less than a sibling because they have different fathers. It’s not their fault.
Buy her the phone. It is completely age appropriate and offers communication while you are overseas. I think it’s a great gift!
She is 14 and it’s 
reasonable for her to have a phone at that age.
Get her the phone! He mother needs to chill out and explain to her other children that your daughter’s father is getting her gifts too. That’s on her mom not you.
The others are not your responsibility get her the phone
No you should be able to buy that for your daughter she is 14. Her mom is out of line her other kids are not your problem and the value of the gift shouldn’t be an issue. The issue is her other kids father aren’t going to come thru like you and that’s not your problem!
Get your daughter the phone! So you can stay in touch with her…She’s 14 probably almost high school she should’ve had one already!!
She’s being petty. Get ur child whatever u want!! 14 is definitely old enough for a phone. Not ur problem she can’t do the same for the others
Would mom let her use it if you purchase it? If yes I’d say get that girl a iPhone… if not how about a iPad? It does all the same things or even a tablet and download kids messanger
She sounds bitter. Get your daughter the iPhone.
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I get a teenager with phone and chat with you being over seas and your kid
Personally, I would get her the phone. And if your not over seas yet. I would give it to her early.
Nope. Not your kids not your issue. I’d get it for her anyway.
I would definitely get her one .