My ex won't stop contacting our daughter

So my ex and I split up in the beginning of August. I have an 11 yo daughter from a previous relationship that I have full custody of. Ex was told he is to have no contact with my daughter. But he keeps texting her. Putting her picture on his Facebook. I feel like there’s nothing I can do to stop it. I guess my question is, at what point does this become harassment? At what point does him putting her pictures on his public social media violate her privacy? Even when we were together he wasn’t exactly father material, he definitely isn’t now that we have separated. He’s toxic, manipulative, and narcissistic. How can I stop this without having to change her number? How do I get him to leave her alone? He doesn’t message me, just my child. Hes not saying anything wrong tbh, just that ge loves and misses her, but he was told not to contact her. In wv for reference.


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My ex won't stop contacting our daughter

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You say he is a narcissist. If he is. He won’t stop. Change her number and make sure he never gets it


Block the number. You can’t control what he puts in FB. Just keep your social private and don’t allow your daughter to have a social account.


Get a restraining order against him for your daughter and you


Do u only don’t like the fact that he is still contacting your daughter . Or doesn’t your daughter like it either ?
It’s not really how you feel about this because you were not the only one who made a commitment in that relationship , anyhow … hearing just 1 side of this it’s hard to tell because it takes 2 to tango .


If your ex has been told not to have contact with YOUR 11 year old daughter, he is breaking the law. Call the police.


He’s keeping tabs on you using your daughter don’t allow that


Block his number. Change her number.


What is wrong with a man loving your child and wanting to be in her life how cruel to remove him from her life the more people who loves besides the better


I would change her number. I know it is a hassle, but even blocking him won’t work if he is determined, he could just keep changing his number. Sorry this is happening to you, good luck!


Definitely get an ivo. An ivo also restricts him from posting anything about you and your daughter


Changing your address change your phone number


Who told your ex not to contact her? If it was the courts, take screenshots, get phone records, go to court, and have him violated. If there were no courts involved, get a restraining order and change her number and make sure there is no way he will ever get it. Tell everyone you know to keep it from him. There’s something creepy about him contacting her and not you.

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I’d change her number if it’s that big of a deal tbh. Probably the easiest thing to do in thus situation.

As for the fb… maybe take him to court for the privacy have everything documented and known not to do any of this anymore

Block the number. I Block people from my son’s phone I dnt want him having contact with and he has no idea

Unpopular opinion here… she’s 11 & doesn’t need a phone :woman_shrugging: if she absolutely does then get a kid account that you can program up to 5 numbers to be allowed to call and text. You can change her number and she may text him giving him the new number. :woman_shrugging:


Is there a court order? You can’t just tell him no because y’all broke up. Normally all parents are involved legally no matter the status of your relationship unless they chose not to be and then thats grounds for abandonment.

Just change her number and get it over with if he’s so terrible and not a good male role model for her. Why stress it…


Are they close is it going to hurt her talking to him or not being able to talk to him? It’s not about him at this point it’s your daughter is it just annoying u they have a bond or is he really just genuinely care about her and wants her to be ok there’s so much stuff to think about

It really depends on how old she was when yall got together honestly… I mean if she was like a year old he helped raise her pretty much all her life so that makes him more of a father then the real dad but if yall was only together like a year then yea change her number


Block him on the phone, on all social media and keep doing it if he creates new accounts xx

Should have said the more people who love a child the better

File a police report and get a restraining order

Change her number or block his number on her phone…report pics to facebook.

Block numbers on her phone but what’s the relationship ship here how long was he her “dad”

Block his number an if it continues have a protective order in place my ex would message my 9 year old just to mess with his head when he didn’t get what he wanted from me or my family it was close to having a avo placed but I changed all his contact details before it got to much

You should talk to your daughter and see how she feels. My current boyfriend is not my daughters biological father. We started dating when I was pregnant. Her bio dad was abusive and had never met her. My daughter is now 3 and has only ever known my current boyfriend as her father. If we ever broke up we have both agreed that he would still be in her life as much as he wanted to be because she adores him, he’s her dad. If your 11 year old had the same relationship with your ex then it seems harsh that you would take that away from her. But if he didn’t that’s a different story.


Check to make sure he wasn’t abusing your daughter

Block him, change your daughters number, dispose of and dispose of his number. No contact for both of you.

I had an ex that helped raise my first born from a baby. I broke off the relationship, but he would respectfully ask me if he could talk to him, send a birthday gift, Christmas gift etc. The key is, he asked me FIRST. He slowly backed away once I got married to not cause conflict. If you asked him to stop, then he needs to stop.

Get your lawyer to write a letter.

If it is court ordered no contact then i think u can get a restraining order

What was the basis for it to be put in a court order for him not to contact her?

U can always report the pics saying they done have permission to use the pics?

That’s a pedo right there! Get a restraining order and also change her phone number! That’s harassment already!

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Block his number on your daughters phone.


Get a restraining order. If you already have one turn him in Everytime he does something. It is harassment! And scary. I’d be worried what else he’d would do. Definitely turn him in to the police.

My daughter just asked me this yesterday if my husband and I broke up if she would still be able to go see him and they could still be besties. I said of course. He helped raise her.
I don’t know the whole story here but the more love my kids have the better.
If it is really bothersome change her number, ask her not to engage and if it persists call the police.


First block him on all things social media, cell number. Make her block him as well if she has him on anything. Secondly if none of that stops him, contact the police.

Get a restraining order. This is stalking and she is a minor child.

Does her phone have a block number option?

She’s 11. Block him.


Report him and block him off her phone and social media

Po-leeses are for exactly this shit right here. Come after my eleven year old and I wouldn’t blink. I’d end him.

Block him and social media

Block. Protective order. Creep.

What is your daughter view on this…


Protective order in place ASAP.

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I note you refer to her as “our daughter” then clarify she is yours from a previous relationship. He has too much access to her. Change her number and block him on social media. Who cares if he continues to post on his social media which you are obviously keeping track of. You or she wouldn’t know it if you would block him. Just drop it. Cut the ties, on your end as well. Seems to me that you want the nonsense to continue to a certain extent.


I feel like this story is missing a few details. Was he abusive? How does she feel about it? Is the no contact more for you or her? Not trying to be harsh, just trying to determine if cutting him out is for good or will be harmful.


If you’re questioning if it’s harassment - it’s harassment.
She’s a minor and he never has been and won’t be a legal guardian nor is he her father. This is disturbing even though he’s not saying anything wrong in your eyes. It’s uncomfortable to read this from an outside perspective.
Go to or contact the non emergency dept of your local police dept and ask for guidance and pursue making boundaries that can be enforced by the law. As former law enforcement, this is hinting at child predator.
I hope you work things out for all of you.


You brought this person into your daughter’s life and you allowed her to get close to him on a father daughter level… She is old enough she should have a say if she still wants contact. Like it or not their is a bond there. If he isn’t saying anything awful or out of the way then your making it into something it’s not.

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Literally get the police involved.

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I would just change her number. That’s not the real father so if you don’t want him contacting her then as her mother he needs to respect that. Especially if she’s a minor.

Maybe he changed, if there is a court order than you should take action. Sometimes they show their true colors when there is a separation just saying

I love and will always be thankful to my Step Dad for raising my sister and I. I think this situation might be difficult for you but talk to your daughter. If she answers the phone and wants to talk to him is because she misses him and there is NOTHING wrong with that. When my Mom decided to leave my Dad, it broke my heart. I hated her for not allowing me to talk to someone I care so much for. I understand she was hurt but at the end of the day she ended up hurting us due to her actions.

Hopefully, you can just block his calls and social media. It is violating the order.

Question? Where is her bio dad and why isn’t he shutting this down?

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Change ALL your previous FB posts to “Private”, so he can’t steal your pics of her.
Block :no_entry_sign: him

Lots of factors here need to be considered. How long were you together? Did he help raise the girl? Is he a good father figure (even though he isn’t a good partner type) . Was he abusive to her ect . Does she want to talk to him? Who told him not to talk to her. You or the court? I feel like more details are needed. I know alot of times people get into relationships with people early on in their kids lives. You expect them to treat your s/o like a parent and vice-versa. Then when it doesn’t work for you… they have to suddenly lose the father figure too. And the ex lose a child he is attached to and loves. It really depends on a lot of stuff. She is ultimately your child. You have to determine if its bad for her or just you that they communicate. If its bad for her…then take legal actions.

As soon as he did it once after you said not it it’s inappropriate. Period.

He sounds like a narcissist…

you can block the # and make her FB and yours private and block him there for a start…

are you sure he aint a perv

It sounds like he got attatched to you and your baby, but it still doesn’t make what he is doing correct or right. He needs mental health support. He has feelings that need to be controlled. He needs to take initiative and feel his feelings in a safe environment, and STOP contacting your daughter when it is against the rules. That’s a violation of boundaries and I can see why you both broke up. Change your daughters phone number. And have proof of that and report it to police. Sometimes it’s gonna take a police officer of the law to tell him he is breaking the law and to go fix himself. Maybe if he would just listen to you, and have common courtesy and respect, he will finally be successful in relationships; but at this moment he is broken up with you, and needs to go talk to a licensed professional who won’t be biased and will give him the best advice on what to do about his heartbreak


He’s doing it to get to you. That’s what they do. Hoping he can make her upset with you. He knows everything he’s doing, is making you mad. You can do much about him posting on his social media. But, you can either block him on her phone. Or change her number

If it is really worry some to you I would definitely recommend blocking the number for starters. If he begins contacting her though another number I believe that could definitely be considered harrassment. But before blocking it, I’d definitely make sure you have photographic evidence of the messages and number he was contacting her on right now, and then make sure to save any new messages/ calls and contact the authorities

Change her number and phone service, Take her phone, block him. Was there a court order preventing hime for contact if so take him with a warrent.

Please she doesn’t really need that phone maybe that the first step you need to take… thanks

9-1-1 THATS WAT ITS FOR, CALL THEM! IF ITS COURT ORDERED HE CAN GO TO JAIL. WE CANT GO BEAT HIS A*S 4 U & WHY dont she have a parental controlled fone? My son can only contact certain #s & ONLY CERTAIN #S CAN CALL HIM everything incoming or out going comes to my fone. Too many psychos out there not to keep our kids extra safe. Cant even trust family these days.!

Uh I would absolutely change her number at that point and file harrassment charges against him

CHANGE HER NUMBER FIRST OFF. She’s 11 it can’t be that difficult to have people know she has a new number and tell her not to let him have it. Block him on social media and if he gets worked up, file a restraining order. Sounds like he knows it makes you mad so he’s keeping it up.

THE FIRST TIME… That’s the answer to the question…THE FIRST TIME… That’s when it is INAPPROPRIATE… HARRASSMENT…OVER THE LINE…AND SHOULD BE REPORTED EVERYWHERE. To the courts…the social media…the police…everywhere.

Take him to court and ger a no contact order

Omg if you feels its harassment change her effing number

What does your daughter think?

Sounds like a pedifile call cops they will direct you