I am all for spanking
Be Patient with her.
Shes 5, she didnt fling it across the room. Sounds like your friends should never have kids and it also sounds like they are trying to con you out of money.
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Find new friends. Yes I would be pissed and tell them to fuck off. I would pay for them but they have no right to be mad at you. Shit happens. Even if ahe did get mad and throw them.
Like I said, pay for them and ghost them.
Okay stop. You don’t punish a child for an accident. You punish a child for bad behaviour. This child didn’t do this on purpose. It was an accident and I wouldn’t be paying the 50 either! Ask for a compromise of half and half which I think it more than fair. It’s been dropped before and therefore damage already done. This was just the final hit. She didn’t do it purposely, it was an accident. Someone I used to be friends with broke the screen on my daughters iPad. I wouldn’t dream of asking her to pay for it as it was an accident.
At the end of the day, they gave your daughter permission to play with this, they didn’t give her full safety instructions etc or ask her to remain seated etc. They allowed a child to play with it. They shouldn’t be asking for anything from you and be damn sure they shouldn’t be telling you how to parent your child! Give her back her privileges as she doesn’t deserve this and explain you made a mistake and you,’re very sorry. Don’t have these people around your child again as they are not nice and only want to see the negatives! Ask them punishments they gave to the child who dropped it before! Bet there weren’t any dishes out at all!
It’s easy to judge what you don’t live. They’ve no idea the different struggle we face. Tell them you’re not looking for advice
She’s a kid, what did they expect you to do, fling her accross the room and do some kinda wrestling move on her? Scream like a psycho?
She didn’t know she had to place them down carefully.
You’re paying for the damage and she has been told that’s not how you treat that item… There’s nothing more to do.
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2 days later they said it was broken? I wouldn’t pay them anything if they didn’t tell me right then and there. Anything could of happened in two days. But it’s nobody business how you discipline your child. When I discipline mine I do it at home in privacy and don’t tell anybody how…all I say is it was handled. I don’t put shoes on for other people. Let them say what they want…not their kid not their business
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If they don’t have kids they won’t understand. You discipline how you see fit. I wouldn’t give them a dime if they waited 2 days to say anything.
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This says she dropped it…not she threw it across the room because she was mad. So, did she just accidentally drop it? I don’t punish my kids for accidents. It happens. If the kids are using something that is fragile I have them sit down with it and help them use it so it lowers the odds of it being broken but I’m not going to punish an accident. I would pay for it and then find new friends. 
Not because they wanted me to replace it, that’s fair but because they are being ridiculous. On the other hand, friend’s kids have broken a ton of stuff at my house and I’ve never once expected them to replace it.
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People don’t understand children suffering from ADHD. You can’t always spank them. I found that they need a strict routine and you as an adult have to check what they are doing. Unfortunately you cannot leave them on their own because they are impulsive and can harm themselves
We know better than our parents did about spanking. The apa, the AMA, and many other associations have come out against hitting kids.
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I’m only assuming, with these post anymore I’m not sure. But, “assuming” that aside from the 5 year old-who is only 5 the rest of you would be adults. IF it’s the first thing she broke, then your lucky. Give them the $50 and that should be the end.
Tell her to worry about her own kids. If she ain’t got none, STFU
I had a Nikon camera and my cousin was seeing pics suddenly her son came and dropped the camera. I picked it up and it was completely out of order. It was devastating but I simply could not ask her to replace. Because it sounds so materialistic. It could have been broken by me too. But On her part she did not scold her son or pay 
. I feel like Ur friend is not doing right.
They stated that it had been dropped before that does not mean when your child dropped it she was the sole cause of it breaking but they understood that she may miss handle it because of the issue she has they took the responsibility to let her play with it they cannot prove she was the sole one who broke it stating it had been dropped before so how do you know that when you left one of the other kids played with it and dropped it again you don’t so when they let her play with it they assumed the responsibility not you and it is not their place to tell you how to punish or not punish your child
Nope you did great. They feel for some reason- threatened by the amazing way you parent your daughter. Maybe they are the type to yell and scream. I wouldn’t ever leave her with them. Your parenting choices are yours alone and you do not answer to them for how you parent. A true friend wouldn’t make another feel guilty for the way they parent- esp when the parent is willing to pay for the break in the toy. They allowed the child to play with it too. 
keep that chin up mama!!!
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Okay first things first, this is your child, not theirs. You choose what punishments fit best, no one else.
Secondly, how do you know this headset is broken due to your child dropping it? 2 days is a long time! AND they said it was okay as they have been dropped before! That’s gold in my eyes! They can’t say it’s okay then 2 days later say it’s not and demand money! They gave this item to a CHILD to play with and therefore hold responsibility for the consequences. If your child deliberately threw this then yes, you should pay and punish your child accordingly. BUT, you NEVER punish a child for an ACCIDENT which is exactly what this was! It’s not her fault! They need to accept this! Don’t punish her! That’s just cruel! YOU are her parent and it’s up to YOU how you choose to parent. It’s none of their business at all! Your daughter apologised to them straight away which is really good and should have been enough, without having privileges take,n away. Tell them if they wish to remain friends then they need to be more mindful of children in general, but more so children with special needs. They shouldn’t expect ANY parent to punish a child over an accident! Jeez, the amount of times my kids have dropped things is unreal. Or spilt things! I’m not going to punish them or tell them off over an accident. It’s ridiculous and cruel! They are not parents and therefore don’t have the understanding needed in these situations. Tell them no, you won’t be covering the cost, but you hope in the future they can be more understanding of children and more so special needs children. If they don’t accept what you’re saying, then don’t have them in your lives. You don’t need people around your daughter with such a negative influence. She needs to be surrounded by positive influences only and people who are understanding and supportive. We all F up. It’s part of what makes us human. They are in the wrong here. Don’t punish your child for this, she’s done nothing wrong and doesn’t deserve punishment
I’d say lose the friends. It’s really convenient they discovered it broken 2 days later.
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I would end the friendship. Tell them to come back once they have kids and raise them perfectly.
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Why did they let a 5 year old play with a vr headset??? Like if you dont want a kid to break something out should be off limits in the first place.
You also did punisher her. You said youbtiok tv away. Okay done.
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First of all, it’s not up to them how you and your partner parent your child. They have no say. You said you would pay the amount for it. Secondly, I would never see these so called “friends” again. They are being rude, your daughter is only 5 years old. How would she know dropping it would break them.
Nah I’d cut them.off no hesitation… 1st off u discipline yr child the best way u see fit
…no one has a say expect maybe yr husband/her dad. And she is still learning and understanding the seriousness of alot of things…but beat her ass cause a head set broke that she dropped??? Um no. That’s why things have age limits on them
Plus like u said
…they ruined something of yours and never paid or fixed it…tell em consider us even now. And #lessonlearned
Shes a kid… Shes 5… Mistakes happen, deal with it how you already have. Pay for the stupid thing and keep doing what your doing. I work with mentally and developemently issues in children and adults and it was handled very well!
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Man your friends don’t sound like friends at all. She dropped it and they said it happens all the time. Then two days later they say it’s broken… 
Sounds like you need new friends. No one should tell you to beat your kid’s ass. You do the parenting and tell them to go piss up a rope.
You’re not doing anything wrong. You handled everything how we would.
I have found that setting a timer and making my children sit at kitchen table has worked for me my daughter has ADHD and is autistic. My son has ADHD and PTSD. My other son has ADHD
Um, they let a child play with it, therefore they should use a bit of common sense and understand that it’s a child, they make mistakes. Its obviously been dropped before so how is it your child fault completely? How were they fine with it up until they realised it was broken? Since its broken now it’s an issue? They’ve dropped it before, who knows how many times so it can’t fully be because of your child that it broke completely. I think they’re full of it to blame it completely on your child. I’d keep my 50 and for them being completely disrespectful regarding how you parent your child and blaming it all on your kid when who knows what happened to it during those 2 days it took them to figure it out, I’d expect them to apologize to me and my kid. How you handled it is just fine. If they so desperately need your 50 for A DECISION THEY MADE TO ALLOW YOUR KID TO PLAY WITH THEIR ELECTRONIC DEVICE then take it as that 50 helped you realize that they’re jerks. They wouldn’t be my friends af,ter this.
They’re not even parents, they have zero knowledge what is and isnt fair when it comes to discipline. Don’t take it to heart. Pay the 50 to ease your conscience and maybe think about distancing yourself from them for a bit.
She’s 5, sounds like you punished her enough. If I don’t want other people’s kids messing with my kids stuff I put it away before they get here. My 3yr old had a small batter powered 4 wheeler and when my nephew came over he’d sit on it and just gas it. Not that it went fast but it’s loud and he’d run into stuff and just keep hitting the button and spinning the wheels. I’d have to put it away.
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I think you need some new friends.
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She’s not their kid to worry about, you feel she’s been punished enough and that’s all that’s needed.
As for the headset, if they’re willing to let a 5 year old play with it, that’s their responsibility, not yours. I’d offer to pay something towards it, but I hope you’re not paying more than half!
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Shit happens. Pay them and stop hanging out with them.
Ive never beat my kids. You learn by making mistakes…and no one else should parent your child.
Well to be honest if a friends child broke something as such of mine … hell yes I’d expect it to be replaced … that’s called respect . As for the their dog , why wasnt that brought up at the time ?
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Pay the $50 and find new friends. How I discipline my kids is my business, I’m not gonna stand for “friends” lecturing me on how to discipline my kids or critique my parenting. That’s overreaching and inappropriate.
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I definitely wouldn’t be going back over there. Shes your child, you punish her how you see fit seeing as she has a few problems. They shouldn’t have even said it was ok for her to play with. And how exactly do they know she broke it of it’s been dropped multiple times and who knows what happened to it during those 2 days it went “undiscovered”. But I definitely would drop them for telling me how I should parent
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Kids break things. Shit happens. Both of kids have broken expensive TVs. Accidentally of course but they didn’t get disciplined… they got talked to but it was a freaking accident. Your friends are taking this too far. You already said you’d pay for it and she got privileges taken away. Do these people want blood? Like WTFFFFF. She’s 5. She’s a child. SHIT HAPPENS.
Ignore them, it’s your child
Yea that would be a deal breaker for me I would pay them the $50 and cut ties with them. True friends don’t treat you like that and act like that.
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They have no kids. It’s their house. She broke their property. They have a right to lash out and get upset. You’re gonna pay to fix it. Problem solved. If they are still upset even after you replace it, thenmayne look into new friends. Otherwise, 6think everything will be fine just dont allow her to break anything else of theirs and prepare to pay if she does.
She is 5. FIVE. She has been on this earth for only FIVE years. Oh my goodness it’s not her fault. Shame on your friends they should be embarrassed for expecting you to hit your child over a simple accident. Let’s pray they never have children.
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Agreed I feel like no one should tell you anything for the way you discipline your child & if it were me I’d cut ties because you agreed to pay yet still upset & had the audacity to comment about “beating her ass” … you protect your baby & mabey just keep a closer eye when it comes to other peoples property.
Of course you should replace
your child is 5 they need to pull their head in a bit you are going to pay for it so what’s their issue
Unless you have a child on the spectrum or with a neurological delay, Please don’t speak on how a parent that does should parent. You have no idea❤
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She’s only 5, u told her it was wrong n apologized…Let them get over it…They sound a bit much…You raise your child the way u want.
If she purposely dropped it, I could understand why they might say that. I would send them a check and write them a note on how offended you are and would bring up what their dog did and how you didn’t bug them for the repair at the apartment.
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These are not good friends, First they have no Compassion?? So you have a child with health issues, Why would you Hang around them??
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Anyone who advocates beating children does not:
- love children nor
- Belong in my friend group. I do t support abusers, even if they were abused themselves.
Abuse (often disguised as ‘corporal punishment) does nothing for children. This has been researched for decades and all points to the this conclusion.
Not their kid not their problem.
Wow you have some friends ok she broke it nut kids with this dont always filter what your saying if she has autism then even taking privledges they still dont fully no why there getting punished at that age its got nothing to do with diaplinning stupid people i have three grandsons with it and at that age they never fully filtered things until older youngest one still cant filter some things now you are good parents and unless they have kids with problems they dont no what there talking about
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Ok first off those things are made to survive a fall? Now it was an accident it’s not like she slammed it down to the ground and smashed with her foot to break it. Replace it and get new friends period. Now just because you put a title for your daughter’s behavior doesn’t mean you shouldn’t whip her ass when needed. Sorry but talking to little ones who don’t understand is hard but include the belt and you get a great understanding. Now there is a huge difference between discipline and abuse. NEVER cross that line and your raise a bright young lady who’s respectful. If you stick to this time out and safe space mentality you’ll just raise a spoiled piece of snowflake crap. I’m a pround mother of four, 2 serving our great country and 2 In college very respectful and very patriotic.
Tell them that when they have children, they can discipline them how they see fit but since she’s your child you’ll do what you feel is right. Also pay them that $50 you said you would and then tell them to fuck off.
I’m a strong believer in disipline not punishment. I wouldnt have punished her if this was her first time using a VR headset. First of all toys are toys to 5yos. They don’t understand the value of money or that some things cost more than others. Value in a child’s mind is in the joy, entertainment it gives them. To my special needs 6yos sticks & rocks have more value than a gadget meant for adults. She probably drops her toys all the time to no consequences. So punishing her for dropping this toy is only confusing her. I guess it would also depend on if she dropped it or three it in anger. Second of all of this is something new to her. I’ve never used a VR but aren’t they stimulating? You know she has issues & possibly autistic. I feel you should’ve either stopped her from using it or prepared her for it. The first time I let my son with sensory issues use my phone he dropped it, cracked the screen. It was my fault. It was over stimulating. He didn’t know what to expect or how to handle it, all at once. I think it’s great you offered to pay for it. But they’re disrespectful of you to tell you how to parent. I’d also bring up the damage their dogs caused & tell them you’re even.
They what? Have no kids? They can fuck off and shut the fuck up then. You did what was appropriate and works for YOUR child only you know what works best. You keep up the great job momma, and ignore them.
Nope - y’all did nothing wrong. She’s 5.
you’re a good mother. I would pay for whatever she broke and forget about it.
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First, she is a child. She made a mistake. She should not be punished. Second, if they allow a child to play with an expensive item then they should understand the consequences. I myself think if the item wasn’t “broke” when she dropped it then she didn’t break item. Sounds like they want you to pay for it. Also, if my friends don’t love and treat my children as their own then I have no need for that “friend”. If they loved your child they wouldn’t expect you to punish a young child, especially one with developmental issues harshly.
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Small children and expensive toys don’t go together, end of story! If you don’t want hypocrites in your life terminate the friendship
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You need to discipline your daughter as you see fit.
If she threw it then I could see a smack on the butt…but she dropped it… wasn’t on purpose…
She’s learning… can’t expect her to ba a adult…you did right…tell your friends when they have kids they can discipline theirs…
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Id say pay the $50, your kid broke it. They dont have kids= they have no business telling you how to parent, end of story.
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Definitely pay the $50…your child broke their property. Sounds like it was an accident and you’ve handled it appropriately. Ignore their comments
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How did no one know until 2 days later? Did they not use it for two days and she was the last one to use it? Seems suspicious to me.
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If they only realised 2 days later that your child broke it, they could be lying. Theu shoukd have checked on the spot and asked you to replace it. Which really I would only consider paying half when they were the ones thay let a 4yo play with it and it was am accident.
This sounds like a typical case of sim0ly growing apart as you are now in different paths in life.
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Your friends are clueless. Accidents happen.
She is your child, your rules, Tell them to butt out.
Your a amazing mother. Keep doing what your doing and dont let anybody tell you different
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I would pay them the $50 toy said you would and cut contact. They get no say in patenting your child. I think the punishment is appropriate.
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I myself would never ask a parent to pay for a broken item I allowed someone of that age to use. 1 those consoles are really designed for 8-10 and up. 2. A child of that age will break far more than you expect before they reach 7 years old. 3. A 4-5 year old has no concept of how electronics work or why they don’t work. All they know is it’s broke. Don’t work. 4. As a responsible adult you did the right thing by accepting responsibility for your child’s involvement. 5. No matter the punishment, the type and degree is solely the responsibility of the parents. 6. Where is this persons owners manual that explains what and how to punish a child on everything they could possibly do wrong, so we can all learn to parent the same. Sorry. But I don’t think one exists. Kids will be kids. Stuff will get broke. Nasty fingers will get on the wall. Magical sharpie somehow places a wild design on the wall. You parent as you see fit. Period. In the end you and only you have that ri,ght to decide what when where and how to punish your child.
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Maybe time for ne friends?
She’s 5 and they don’t have children especially a child in her situation. Tell them when they have a child exactly like yours and they’re perfect then absolutely tell me what I’m doing wrong til then? Hush it.
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Yeah bye 
. They aren’t real friends.
Super supportive friends! Not. Everyone always seems to have something to say or add. I ignore those because that crap will come back to them. Get some new friends
Children don’t need to be spanked… You just need to pay them their money and never look back. You don’t need friends like that.
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Great job Mom you did what you thought was right she is 5 as she grows continue to keep in mind her age as she gets older when it comes to discipline and remember some people who don’t have children need to take several seats😊
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You were right mom, if the friendship does break its thier fault not theirs people with no children never mind a adhd child should be giving no advice to any parent. You disciplined he the way saw fit and has nothing to do with them. Kids break stuff its normal… sounds like you better off with ou them any way.
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I have no words of wisdom, but I’ve been there. My daughter has ADHD also, I was a single parent and my mother told me I just didn’t discipline her enough. Do you want me to lock her in the closet or beat the crap out of her because I tried everything else. Fast forward, she’s grown, a productive member of society and I survived also.
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Legally you’re not responsible they gave it to her to use, that’s the risk involved… the fact that you are shows class, however that would be my last interactions with them handing them 50$ and never see or speak to them again. What they are saying is disrespectful. Whats beating a 5 year old special needs or not going to accomplish? You dealt with your child how you feel is appropriate. Thank god they don’t have kids! But I would end the friendship or lack their of with these people. Pay them 50$ and never speak to them again. Becusse you didn’t beat your kid they now want you to pay for it…
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She’s 5 … kids break shit … 
… A. they shouldn’t gave it to her to use if they wasn’t ok with taking that chance… B. No kids, no opinion… you’re doing all you can do by paying em back… C. sometime you can’t keep a friendship with friends who don’t have kids … it’s just mom life …
As a 5 year old, she’s still learning so many things. It’s so much better to talk to them rather than beat them. Talking let’s them know what the did wrong and how to go about it next time they’re frustrated or whatever the case is. Parenting isn’t about beating your kid everytime they do something wrong, what does that accomplish… a hurt and confused kid. I’d pay them and never look back.
As long as you post for the thing they shouldn’t be bitching about if ANYTHING is told the child.
If they didn’t understand that five year olds can easily break nice things, that’s on them for being stupid. You’re paying them back anyway. But seriously they need to know that kids break stuff and if you can’t handle the fact that item can/will be broken then they shouldn’t have let her play with it.
Honestly they’re holding a five year old to teenage standards.
This would totally break a friendship with me. If they didn’t want her using it, don’t let her plain and simple, but they did let her, knowing she is a child and it could break. She didn’t even do it on purpose and honestly I see NO REASON she should have been disciplined in the first place, but thats just me. My daughter is 3, she’s dropped an entire carton of eggs on the floor, a half gallon of milk, split her paint, but at that he end of the day, she’s still a child. The eggs she wanted to bake her way of telling me the milk she wanted more on her cup and the paint accidentally fell…I didn’t punish or discipline her…she’s learning independence, how to put actions behind words.
Your child said sorry, and you are paying for thr broken item…that should have ended that bc they should have taken some responsibility too. But to try to tell me how to parent my child…that’d be the end right there for me.
If they let the child play with it really it’s there loss at 5 even without any issues it could have happend and an ass woopen would be a bit extreme
They’re uneducated 1. Spanking accomplishes nothing in a normal child besides fear and anxiety 2. It makes kids with behavioural disorders lash out and be angry and 3. They dont have kids and have no idea how hard a child is let alone one with special needs. They should have checked the item straight away but because they didnt who knows if your daughter actually broke it. They trashed your house and didnt offer to fix it and their still your friends?
Get new friends! Parent your kids how u feel is necessary
Sweetheart It doesn’t matter how anyone would handle it she is your child you are doing the best you can do don’t worry about what other people thanks again she is your child not theirs everyone has a different way of raising their kids may God-bless you and your little girl
I raised 7 children I dont think any of you no what u are talking about
Honestly, she’s 5. It doesn’t matter what her other issues are, SHE’S 5! She’s still learning how to do things, she’s still learning what can and can’t be done, she’s still learning. You were right, she had something taken away, she apologized, they didn’t fuss about it until they knew it was broken, and who let’s a child play with something you don’t want broken? Seriously, I would be looking in to new friends. People that don’t think your 5 year old child needs to get beaten.
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Its YOUR CHILD…LWT HWE BE A CHILD…
Let her be a child…I meant .
as a mom of 3, 2 of which are autistic… i say you do you momma… she got punished, youre paying the $50… honestly if they continue to go on about youre parenting id cut ties… you nor your daughter need that negative in youre lives…
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That’s your kid. Your job. Don’t listen to everyone else
It sounds like you are doing a great job mama!
Im sorry but fuck them my child is autistic but unlike other children she doesn’t have that before hand warning in her head we all get that say dont drop this it will break so no i wouldn’t spank my child over it and id pay for it and tell them to mind thier own business
Well if she like threw it down hard deliberately then I’d say the punishment is light, not saying to spank. But she is only five too much punishment wouldn’t get to her. Though if she just kind of dropped it then . As long as she feels her apology. It’s good on you for paying some and honestly they should be happy with that. These things happen. They don’t sound like great friends.
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I think u are handle it just fine, she’s just a child, she didn’t mean to do it, I dont think she needs to be punished, I guess the only thing u can do is what u doing, if they were worryed about her breaking it, they shouldn’t of let her play with it. You are doing the right thing, and who cares what they think.
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