My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for a year with no luck and now his ex who in the past would not let him see or have anything to do with his 6 year old son has started letting him see his child, and i am happy for him and support him in every way, but i get so emotional about it because we’ve been trying with no luck. Does anyone know why or maybe have any advice?
34 Likes
Seek a fertility dr.
1 Like
See a fertility specialist and a therapist. You are married, it is your step kid, so in a way you are a mom.
6 Likes
I had a hard time getting pregnant and then my doctor recommended I get my tubes flushed and Bam!! Pregnant after 2 months (: good luck! Dont give up
You need to see a fertility doctor. No one here will have an answer for you because they do not know your health history or anything like that.
3 Likes
Sometimes it takes a little while. Keep trying. Try not to get jealous feelings of him with his other child. Just try to enjoy watching him as a father. That child will be your child’s older sibling so try and only think positive thoughts and positive feelings
How i Get my ex back with the help of Dr Nathan who help my sister to bring back his lover who left her and her kids to suffer for a year for no reason all her effort to try and reach him to no avail then a friend gave her the contact of Great Dr Nathan. so she mail him about her problem and he assure her that in 48hrs her lover who left her and the kids will come begging just has he said 48hrs later her lover called her asking her to forgive him that he can’t explain why he left family to suffer am happy he is back with more love for my sister and the kids. If u are suffering from depression or any kind of problem you can contact him on (Nathanayakasolutionhome@gmail. com) whatsapp him +2347019014544
Therapist or psychologist / fertility doctor. In that order.
4 Likes
I had my daughter 5years ago shortly after her i started trying we didnt get preg till recently different father but besides the point we went to an ob to get the referral to fertility clinic had to get a second opinion by ob and got paper work ready to do sperm testing ect and went on medication for my bladder and as soon as i started the med i got preg we found out the next week i was preg super early to know but super glad after over 4 years of trying
I tried for a year also and had a cousin that got pregnant twice within that time. I remember having some jealous feelings that I knew were not appropriate. My advice…go to the dr. Mine was a hormone problem that was manageable. Hopefully yours will be too!
Try with another guy
4 Likes
I couldn’t get pregnant at all. I miscarried like CRAZY … my doctor recommend taking a prenatal vitamin every morning and a folic acid before bed every day to “prepare my body for a pregnancy “ I remember being in her doctors office crying because I was about ready to give up! Couple months later i conceived! I was very high risk but I now have a very healthy 6 year old & a 3 year old 
2 Likes
I agree therapy first, because your husbands son isn’t going anwhere and you do not want that disappointment to affect your relationship with your husband or his son.
Absolutely feeling upset is normal, it’s natural but you are the onlybone who can handle that in a healthy way.
Once youve done that a discussion with fertility expert is in order. Good luck hun
3 Likes
I think your over trying. Yes I know it sounds crazy but it could happen. I would talk to your primary to run some test and also have your hubby do the same. Being jealous of something you want so bad is normal but don’t hate embrace his 6 yr old you will be completely surprised on how a child can change your heart. I say you relax go on a nice vacation and enjoy your time together 
trust me a child will come when it’s your time. Your Dr should refer you to a fertility Dr. But enjoy your life while you waith for the baby .
1 Like
Stop trying just relax and have fun x
Don’t be with a man who has kids from a previous relationship.
I have always learned Stop worrying about it. U ever notice that the more ur waiting for something or someone it feels like forever and ur just waiting. But if u sit back live life treat this other kid like 
that way when u least expect it you will be pregnant and everyone will be 
… I have said this many many times and i have friends who were told they could never get pregnant. Ur body and God only know when its a good time BE PATIENT…js
2 Likes
Sometimes it takes a while. Be patient.
Message me I had the same problem and give you a big suggestion that helped me greatly and I’m now 12 weeks 4 days
1 Like
I was trying for two years and 3 months I have a daughter already I’m still with the same man I was on my last time trying we had sex 15 times in 3 days 4 to 7 days after my period I was about to give up and get fertility testing done and boom I was pregnant before we could go.
make sure you have your ovulation down test till you have it. when you are ovulating you need to get to business the whole ovulation cycle. preseed helped me a lot. download glow period fertility tracker and make sure to use everyday.
That may be why u cant struss is good and u wont concieve relax its his child love him and relax
My husband and I tried for two years before we conceived our son. It became a bit stressful half way through when our adult children came to live with us. Also I was stressing myself out. We left for a weekend just the two of us and ended up conceiving that weekend. Start taking prenatal vitamins, reduce stress, and enjoy the closeness with your spouse.
1 Like
If there is no physical reason you can’t get pregnant then start loving on that child–get those mothering hormones flowing. No person should ever be with another who has children unless they fully accept the children as their own–if you can’t do that then get out of the relationship now!
1 Like
Your husband is not going anywhere. The child is apart of your husband’s life which means the child should also be part of your life. It is not the childs fault you can’t get pregnant. You need to go get some therapy and take a look at yourself. Being jealous of a child is ridiculous.
Im a firm believe especially when it comes to this department unless you walked it you will never comprehend the pain. Im so sorry for your brokenness. So i have the most perfect little 2 year old so full of life. She enters a room and joy follows with her. I cnt imagine my life without her now.
But life wasnt always like this my husband and i spent thousands 6 years before that.
Fertility done that ( many times by the way) and every time it gets more and more expensive
Gynecologist many done that
Was also diagnosed with stage 4 endometriosis and poc. I can clear remember sitting in a gynecologist room hearing him say that i will never be a mother. I died that day slept into a deep dark depression everyone around me was having babys yet i was a failure. Or yes hubby had to go through so many tests and procedures himself. But we couldn’t conceive i will never forget in 2016 September my husband said we need to stop everything cause he couldn’t stand to see me go through more test and procedures and more false hopes cause i would be crushed everything time. By the way fertility treatment mess you up and your body in my opinion or shall i say in my case. So in 2017 feb i made peace with us not having a baby and needed to heal my body. So i was recommended to Bianca De Canha Sayers she is a homopath on the westrand infact shes also a fertility homopath specialist. But i never went to her to convince just to be healthy again. She ran my blood and picked up stuff no one ever told me. And started treating me by readjusting my hormones. I started to get better emotional and physically. On the 25th of April i tested positive guess what no fertility treatment just lifestyle change and my Lord Jesus. What was impossible with man was possible through God. My dear please dnt waste money like it did. Pray about it and allow God to lead you.
2 Likes
Get over it
You shouldn’t feel anything but love towards his relationship with his child
2 Likes
Stop trying you’re stressing yourself out and does not help your body relax enough to conceive. Start doing romantic,passionate dates again have fun without the stress once you’re just relaxing,having fun, going with the flow it will happen. Take it from a nine month pregnant woman who was told I’d never be able to get pregnant again.
The son is not the problem and I dont believe she means the son is the problem. I’m sure your just a little jealous that he has a child when you have been trying with no luck that’s normal. So is being a little upset but you are doing the RIGHT thing by supporting him and I think alot of people on here are ignoring that. It’s normal to be upset your emotional from the frustration of not getting pregnant. Try seeing a fertility doctor
1 Like
Make his child your also. I never was able to have kids but my husband had 2, and they both asked to live full time with us. You never know what God has in mind, so love the child he put infront of you.
81 Likes
You need to see a fertility doctor…test his sperm count as well…you may need in vitro fertilization as well…thats a process and it’s costly. But with great results…a friend of mine who’s an investment banker went through this and now has two beautiful children…if all fail…take it to the Lord in prayer!!
7 Likes
Get drunk. It’s worked for millions of women. Love his child as your own focus on family and not what hasn’t happened yet. Be positive and patient
17 Likes
You may be emotional because you’re a little jealous that she gave him a son while you’re trying so hard to conceive but it’s not all about you. Him seeing his son should be a great thing, and not something that causes jealously. I’ve heard it can take 1-2 years on average to get pregnant, so try to stay positive, get healthy and keep trying!
21 Likes
My husband and i went through 2 miscarriages and i know it hurt him more than he let on but he also saw how damaging it was for me. Not long after our second loss we suffured the unexpected loss of my younger brother. I spiralled for a bit in depression. We held on together and decided to try and find the joys in life and our marriage again because it was hard on both of us. On our wedding anniversary i found out that i was finally pregnant without an early miscarriage this time and we couldn’t be any happier. We had already stopped trying long before and made it fun again. I am now almost 36 weeks pregnant expecting our rainbow baby. Time will shine some light as long as you are looking for the light instead of living in darkness
7 Likes
A year isnt long give it another year before seeking help. Its nice he can see his child. Show a happy lntrest even if it hurts. You don’t want to fall out over it. Hope you will get pregnant one day. Blrss you. Xx
2 Likes
I get this all over! I love my stepson with everything but I always knew I wanted my own and I always tried not to show it but at times it was emotionally hard but after 3 years no medical help either, I got my lb and he came at the perfect time when we wasn’t expecting and trying so much just enjoying. My stepson is the best big brother I could of wished for my son they adore each other. Hang in there the feelings are normal but they don’t last xxx
2 Likes
Thats very sad you’re having trouble I would dedicate seek medical help. I completely understand why you feel the way you do about his Son because I’m sure you are as people have said s proper step mom but if had been allowed to be in your life from the start you may not feel this way but as its relatively new and you’re hurting about not having your own to me its human nature to feel the way you do.
Stay strong x
Stop trying so hard!! Stress and many emotions can actually decrease the chances. If you feel there is an issue as well see your obgyn they can do tests that the specialist will do, if the Dr. feels you need to be seen by a specialist they will refer you to one. Good luck!
I see a lot of people get pregnant doing the keto diet. A year is not a lot of time when tryin to get pregnant. Your are very blessed to have a step child.
8 Likes
Talk to an OB. We tried for 18 months. Went to ob and got on clomid. 3 months later we were pregnant.
For now, embrace his 6 yr old as itll be a part of your family when you have a little one
If its been over a year of tracking periods and ovulation then you should ask your ob for some tests. Also what is your age, have you ever been pregnant before, are you on medications that could disrupt your hormones, do you have a thyroid problem? If your periods are irregular you may not be ovulating. As far as getting emotional while he see his child. That is completely normal. You obviously want to have what he has with someone else. That is your husband of course you want a child with him. But for now I would embrace the love of that child and speak to your doctor. Best of luck 
3 Likes
You know, it just comes at different times for different people. I know people that were with someone for ten years and nothing and I know people who get pregnant right off the rip. I was a right off the rip with my first guy for all three of my children. Now that I’m with someone else it’s taking a while we’ve had a few heartbreaks it’s weird and I can’t help think somethings wrong with me now. Rationally, I know these things happen, the heartbreaks means he can have kids and a year is nothing in the trying to get pregnant world.
Instead of trying to get prego jus have fun n dont try. I know that’s easier said than done but really jus have fun. The more u try the more stressful it is wether u think so or not. N as for his kid from a previous relationship… try to enjoy it n help if u can
I know that must be hard… my advice would be try to build a strong bond with his son so you won’t feel as if your left out of that situation.
2 Likes
We tried for over a year and went to the OB doc and turns out I don’t ovulate on my own. Gave me meds and I got pregnant the first month and the third month the next time. Some women just have a harder time. Could definitely be him too so get his sperm checked as well. Difficulty getting pregnant is very frustrating 
I had trouble getting pregnant turns out i had pcos and it made it difficult to get pregnant. I would get checked out to see what could be wrong or sometimes if you think about it to much then it wont happen for you guys. Just not think about it or de stress yourself and it will happen. Good luck
1 Like
I’ve know several couples who tried to get pregnant with no luck. Once they stopped trying, some several years later, they got pregnant. Please think beyond a child of my “body” to a child of my heart, one that you choose and nurture and love. How many kids are lucky enough to have 2 loving mothers?
Maybe you need to be involved in that child’s life too, you are their step mom…
6 Likes
6 years it took me to have my son, it finally happened when I decided to relax & stop trying so hard, I decided finally what will be will be & that I would spend my time enjoying what I have not stressing about what I want & then about a year later there we were with a baby boy to enjoy.
The one should have nothing to do with the other. You need to see a doctor . Enjoy your stepchild . Enjoy seeing your husband be a dad . .
7 Likes
Good things take time chick some take longer to get pregnant in the mean time there’s nothing wrong with going. To see the appropriate people to make sure your both all good to go
I do know people that tried for a long time then gave up and it happened
Babies come when they wanna. Be patient, relax, ENJOY sex, and strengthen your relationship. My hubby and I tried for almost three years for our second child.
Little do we realize that the window to get pregnant is actually pretty short. If you haven’t, use an ovulation test.
Also, people on keto diet (limiting carbs) seem to have great results. The keto diet has been used by people with fertility issues. These are just a couple of things to easily try before reaching out for medical help. Good luck!
Be patient grasshopper God will unexpected new gifts dont give up faith
Uterus maybe tilted my sister in law tried for 5 years went to doctor and that what was wrong now she has 6 kids
1 Like
Sometimes when your trying too hard it just does not happen and if your nervous could have allot to do with it don’t try as hard drink wine
Ya… stop getting overwhelmed and stressed out
If you relax and stop trying so hard it usually works better… unless something else is wrong
1 Like
Don’t try so hard make a relax romantics night candelas soft music some appetizers looking at old pictures from the past some drinks and just lay back and enjoy the moment maybe that will help sometimes when you don’t try so hard it works Good Luck
One thing that helped me was I started eating and stuff as if i was pregnant to get healthier. I stopped vaping, stopped drinking, stopped eating fast food. Limited my soda intake, etc.
Get healthy if you arent.
Exercise.
Healthy foods.
Prenatal vitamins.
Track ovulation if you think it’ll help.
Also see a doctor to see what the next step is if in another 6m you havent conceived.
Usually if you stop trying you’ll get pregnant
2 Likes
It happens when its supposed to happen. Be patient.
Are you advanced maternal age yet? This is a very important factor when it comes to fertility issues.
Stop trying and just things happened if it is in Gods plan it will happen
I’m sorry about that. If you have PCOS or another metabolic issue please look up Dr Jason Fung.
A year is not very long. Keep trying or adopt!
Does Anyone Smoke? My Husband Did. & Quit For 3 Months & I Got Pregnant After Trying For 3 Years
The more you stress about it the more it won’t happen, see a doc to make sure everything is functioning
My obgyn had me take prenatal pills/gummies which ever you prefer. When i had trouble getting pregnant & i got pregnant within 6 months
I fell pregnant on stamino grow however both you and hubby need to take it.
How about getting married first
When I was trying with my first child. Took 7 months. I smoked. So I stopped smoking eating right and took vitamins and got pregnant
All you can do is just try to love his kid as you would your own. Maybe life gave you this baby because you can’t have your own. Being a step mom can be just as rewarding as being a bio mom if you really open your heart to them <3 my step son is one of my best friends <3
3 Likes
Relax, exercise, and get fertile trackers, it took me and my husband over a year I honestly stop caring and relaxed and it happend 
Just relax if you get anxious it might affect you getting pregnant
Adopt one you will soon become pregnant
I think what helped me was I fasted for 3 days and I was eating healthy n excercising.
Stop being jealous about someone else’s child. If you supported him in every way you wouldn’t be jealous. You don’t know the reasoning of why he didn’t see his child for 6 years, but think of that child, it’s NOT about YOU.
8 Likes
You’re an asshole if you’re gonna get mad about him seeing his child …
stay positive and keep trying … your own baby will come. And if not, there’s plenty of alternatives
U can private message me if u want to know about a product that has helped some
They is no greater joy than having finance freedom, with the help of some one I meet here on facebook who help me, traded and I earned and profits he is really God sent to my life thanks alot.
Click to contact him if interested
You need to be healthy in all aspects. Physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally.
If one of these are off balance, such as being bothered by your partner and his child, it needs attention. Love and treat his child as your own, and your body will heal and potentially carry a child.
Be patient. Good luck, mama
5 Likes
The fact that he is seeing his child (not other because you don’t have one together) is a plus. You shouldn’t want to be with someone that does not take care of or see his own child. The child that you two will one day have will have an older sibling that they will love and cherish. Get over it and embrace your bonus child. It happened before you and when its your time don’t expect him to treat his firstborn any different.
7 Likes
One I know it’s hard to see him around his ex but you have to look at this in a way that a person that Love’s and want to have kids to love and have a family kids really need there mother and father in there life because it shows them even if there bio parents didn’t stay together that it would not change the way they care or love and want to be 
part of there life and not have people put or say mean or hurtful things about ones mom or dad because in reality the kids knew what was going to happen before they we’re born and that’s a mother that is a true hero and no one will ever take her story or life struggle or songs and make it yours because you don’t have the first part of the story in writing 
I pray 
for everyone to make it right now Amen in the name of Jesus Christ our God and Savior true King
Why would you get upset at him seeing his child?? Is it jealousy? If so, that mindset needs to change into you loving that child like your own, then maybe you’ll feel happiness to see him. It may take some time because he’s new to the situation, but that additional, unnecessary stress will not help your goal of becoming a mother.
4 Likes
It’s hormones. Jealousy in a way. Completely normal. My fiance and I were trying for a baby for over a year when we found out he had a 8month old daughter that resulted from a 1 night stand just a month before him and I got together. It broke my heart b.c we had been trying for a baby with no success. We went to a fertility specialist and everything for them to tell me our only option would be ivf due to his extremely low sperm count. I was devastated. After receiving a dna test for his daughter we stepped up together and obtained 50/50 custody and raised his daughter. The 3 of us. I went thru every emotion possible. Jealousy, anger, depression… I was so torn apart b.c here we were trying for a baby for a yr and this girl got pregnant with one try. BUT it wasn’t that babies fault that I fell the way I did. SO I pushed my emotions aside and raised that baby girl. She is now 3.5. we had given up on having a baby after we hit 2 yrs of trying and after all the stress of TRYING went away… I found out I was pregnant. I now have a beautiful little boy. Do not feel bad for feeling the way u do but remember that his child deserves a good relationship with his father and you as well. Embrace that child and live him as your own. Get checked over by an ob/ fertility specialist and if nothing is wrong then stop “trying” and just have fun. Keep the romance alive and when you least expect it maybe you will get pregnant also.
3 Likes
That child is just as much his as your child you conceive will be. And stop trying. It’ll happen. I had a 9 year gap between two of my kids. Please don’t be resentful towards that child. He had no say in any of this and deserves the best of times with his father
2 Likes
I was in the same boat… it’s hard to hear but stop trying and thinking about it. We stopped trying and 2 months later I was pregnant!! It’s good to go get a check up/ blood work and start taking prenatal vitamins (that’s what my family doctor said). You can always try tracking when your ovulating but I didn’t have luck with the test. good luck 
Edit: I’m reading some comments and it’s kind of sad some people are getting mad you may feel upset with him seeing his other child. COMPLETELY normal, you said you support him and you’re happy for him seeing his child. Don’t listen to other people they got the wrong message from you. I felt the same way girl! It’s not resentment or jealousy it’s just the fact you want a baby and you’re having a hard time and seeing him with his child can make you feel sad! Totally get it hang in there
4 Likes
Best thing to do is see a doctor…sometimes if you try to hard it seems to affect you getting pregnant…had a friend who was trying so hard that she ended up on IVF …even that didn’t work…so after a few times she accepted the fact of no children…when she stopped thinking about it she ended up having 3 children naturally conceived…so don’t stress so much and all the best…
1 Like
Get some chlomid … they ensure you ovulationing … take the dose before bed to avoid the side effects … take 3 months on and then a 3 month break of your not pregnant by then take for a further 3 months…be pregnant then a friend used them in her late 40s and a few other friends jumped on them and I now have friends 3 all with twins …
Maybe trying embracing his other
Maybe the higher power feel your for a child isn’t now because first child might get pushed aside
Be patient but both of y’all should try taking maca root. A friend of mine and her husband tried for years and started taking this and booom pregnant!
Being resentful towards an innocent child is not ok. You knew about him and now that your husband is getting to see his child your resentful of his relationship with said child? It took me 2 years to get pregnant with our child and 6 years after that. He never treated my oldest with resentment because it took us a while to get pregnant. He loves her as his own child. If you can’t love that little boy like your own and embrace him you need to leave the relationship with your husband because that little boy will know you have resentment towards him. You can’t hide that.
2 Likes
I had the same problem and as soon as we gave up I got pregnant by chance . I think his sperm count was down from all the extra extra sex lol and the pressure of getting pregnant is stressful especially if ur trying so hard
Have faith!
2 Likes
Get.over.it
Seriously…getting pregnant doesn always happen asap, u should love his other child like ur own if hes ur husband…
1 Like
Getting jealous of his other child isn’t the way to go. I get it You want a baby BUT…
Love the chils as your own…it is not the childs fault and the child is part of him remember that
2 Likes
For those with negative comments, please read what she wrote. Ma’am seek your ob/gyn and just be patient. 
I would try seeing your ob/gyn and talk to them about trying for a year then see what they say.
We tried for a year and a half and I’ve had a baby before so I knew I was capable. I say download an app and track your period and ovulations on that