I want a second baby SO bad. My baby is just over one. My husband is not feeling it right now and I just don’t get it. I don’t feel like it could be a monetary reason because I’m the breadwinner. And I don’t feel like he can use the excuse that he’s the preferred/primary parent; I wake baby up in the morning, feed her breakfast get her dressed and take her to daycare(at my job). I even make HIS breakfast and start to wake him up before I leave. I get out before him, am home before him and make dinner every night. And I feel like we equally get time out of the house both as a couple and individually with friends if wanted. I’ve asked if it’s something he’s not happy about that’s hindering him from this and he says no he’s perfectly happy. I just don’t get it, I’m trying to understand where he’s coming from but I just can’t make it make sense to me
He probably doesn’t want anymore. I mean my husband wants 5. We currently have two an due in Jan with our third. I told him I personally didn’t want anymore maybe in 6 years from now since our last two are Irish twins.
Well it’s only been a year since you had your first child? Just table the subject for later on. He may change his mind over the next few years! Definitely do not pressure him. Maybe just wait a couple years and see where you and him are at and discuss it again. As a woman I also thought I definitely wanted more up until my youngest was 3. But from about age 4 and up like I’m glad I didn’t have another one. And I don’t want anymore even if I got remarried !! So just breath- it’s not something that has to be figured out right this second! Enjoy your husband and your baby and life right now! He may feel differently in the future - or you may feel differently too!
It took me 6 years to want another baby. Lots of reasons for me, the biggest being I wanted to give all my attention to only him. Once he was in school I was like dang, a baby would be nice company lol
It may just be a timing thing, the first time I mentioned having my second my husband said no. I also wasn’t completely convinced I was ready, just opening up the conversation. The second time I knew I wanted another and wanted it then with no hesitation, when I mentioned it to my husband he replied with “okay, let’s do it”. I think men sometimes pick up on ques we don’t even know we are given off.
Ours are two years apart almost to the day.
He probably wants to wait a few years.He may want to just enjoy your 1yo.Id give him time.
I recan once bubs a little older he may change his mind as the younger they are the harder it is
Well I mean the fact that your 1st is literally just over a year probably plays a roll in it. Relax and enjoy the precious time you both have with her while she’s young and then maybe try when she’s out of diapers and in school.
You don’t have to understand it. A one yr old is hard and I completely understand why he doesn’t and can’t understand why you would!! It’s just not for you to understand
This is why it’s important to talk about things you want before marriage or if not married talk before doing them with someone who does not feel the same way… but Do not try to force someone into something they don’t want . But if it’s something you want know your signs and do what makes you happy
I’m sure there has been things he doesn’t understand and agree with, if you value your relationship and marriage I strongly suggest you hear what he’s saying without trying to analyze it. Sounds like you guys have a solid routine down and maybe he fears the unknown and change, I am that spouse and my husband has to offer me extra understanding in many moments because of it. Suggest to your husband that you table the conversation for now, your baby is still very young.
Just wait another year … then talk to him about it
Some people just feel it in their souls that they are one and done parents
My advice would be to babysit a newborn with your child and see if you even do want that. Each kid you have is less time for you and your relationship. It’s hard to carve out time for anything for myself and I’m a working mom of three.
Some people decide that ones enough when they have one. You don’t have to understand it, but you do have to respect his wishes too
Maybe he doesn’t feel like he is providing enough? Like he can’t handle it because he feels like he’s not contributing enough to y’all’s family?
Well, he probably just doesn’t want another one period. Not an other reason. We had 3 kids and I always wanted a 4th. But my husband didn’t want another, cuz he was the bread winner and I was SAHM. I respected his decision and I got my tubes tied. I always regretted it. But we would have really struggled financially. We were blessed to get what our kids needed and more. I tied my tubes at 25.
Do not force (and/or manipulate) him in any shape or form to agree on having a second child if he clearly does not want more children (now or ever). From experience, it doesn’t go well and resentment plants itself.
He just doesn’t want one. You may not ever understand why, but those are his feelings.
Maybe it’s just too soon .
No means no. You can’t change his mind. He’s happy with the way things are now
He clearly does not feel the same. Get counseling to understand each other better. Be prepared and willing to not get your way.
It doesn’t have to make sense to you. He can make his own decisions. But just because he doesn’t want another baby while you still have a baby doesn’t mean he doesn’t want one period. He could just want to wait another year or a few. There is no rush to have to have another baby right now.
I will say this 2 under 2 is a lot of work. Give it a bit of time, I would have waited another year or so if I knew how the struggle was. Now that they are older it’s great but the first 3-4 years was a struggle!
Maybe the newborn stage was harder on him than he had verbally spoken. Or maybe something else about the experience is holding him back.
Girl it’s been a year. Calm down lol. Maybe he just wants to enjoy the baby you have now and raising them. Leave it alone and bring it up at a later time. He’s obviously not ready and that’s okay. This wouldn’t even be a post if it was a husband saying this about his wife because everyone would be down his throat saying “Leave her alone until she’s ready” etc.
He has a right to not want any more kids. Stop being so hard on him. He obviously loves you and your child. Being in a relationship takes compromise. Don’t pressure him into something that he doesn’t want. He is telling you what he wants.
Another baby is a whole lot of extra work. Both parents feel it. Is he just not ready yet? Or altogether against another one? Have you asked him why?
It’s hard with 2, I guess your daughter is sleeping through and is a lot easier to manage now. So I imagine the thought of sleepless nights again isn’t something he really wants. Enjoy some time with husband and take things a bit slower
So why do you need him? He apparently isn’t in this marriage
My ex husband was discussing me being pregnant again 2 days after I almost died in labor and was recovering from a broken pelvis and a broken off tailbone. He didn’t understand why I’d never have another baby. Your husband says he is happy now. Maybe he knows he will not be if you have another baby. Leave it alone or find another 
and divorce since you want more kids and this one doesn’t.
Maybe he simply just doesn’t want one? Why do men have to have reasons and sht but we’re allowed to just say no and that’s it.
He’s not very active in the family by the sound of it. If he doesn’t want another kid that his choice. If your not happy with his choice. It’s equally ur choice to leave and find a more active partner.
I have 2
My husband wants 6
We are having 0 more unless something crazy happens.
Not everyone enjoys kids and it’s okay. I love my kids but horribly miss not having anyone to take care of or entertain 24/7.
Some people are one and done. He may not be able to mentally handle it
Unfortunately it doesn’t have to make sense to you. He feels how he feels. I know as a mother it’s hard to accept when you want another, but forcing him could lead to resentment, stress, or worse case a break up. Maybe he doesn’t cope as well as you do with children home life and work life balance. Or just simply doesn’t want to 
have you tried having a proper sit down chat about it ?
Your baby is just one. Let the man breathe😂
I wanted 3-4. Than I had 1. And 2. And soon 3.
….when I had 1…i wanted to change my statement and go back in time and have 0.
Now…i still stand by 0.
I love my kids. But still 0.
But when I DIDNT have kids. I wanted a bunch. Than I had one and realized the joy people find…I personally do not find it like I thought I would.
Sometimes a person just doesn’t want another child. There isn’t anything wrong with that.
My husband kept saying no until ours turned 5 and now he’s mentioned it multiple times. Yeah, it’s too late now. 
Doesn’t matter that you take charge it still affects the family unit as a whole. Just give it time see if he changes his mind
he might feel like fits too soon and he’s entitled to that feeling. maybe revisit this conversation in 6 months or so.
He probably sees all the work and stress your under and he doesn’t want to put more stress on you.
Or sometimes he is just happy as things are and he doesn’t want that to change
Maybe he just wants to enjoy the one he has? They’re only little for such a little while- why rush into having more so quickly?
Sometimes, people only want 1 child. It’s not that deep.
Leave it alone. Your child is 1. There’s time yet. He’s just happy with the 3 of you for now. He may change his mind in a year or 2, why the rush?
You dont have to get it, thats HIS choice
The person he married has changed and he is still getting used to it. Not everyone acclimates to new dynamics at the same time. He sees how much it takes to take care of one, even if you are the one doing all the work which if you tell him that is not a good argument. You have to respect what he says. Having another baby willingly knowing he does not will create resentment towards you. Just wait and give him time. I hope this is not a deal breaker. You have a family, enjoy it being you three for now and lay off the topic.
Maybe he really doesn’t want another one or maybe it’s now. Wait for a while now then ask him again. Could be the same answer but give it time.
Does there really HAVE to be a reason. Maybe its BECAUSE he’s happy that he doesnt want another child right now. He could change his mind down the road. You stated your child is just over a year, that may have something to do with it as well. Enjoy your little one before having another.
Probably thinks
He is not ready to have another baby so quickly
Remember it’s his decision as well
Wait another year or 2
He may be more inclined to think about it
This sounds like a conversation you should have had before you started getting serious.
My opinion…If both don’t agree it’s a no…Period… Should not even matter why !
It sounds like he’s your second kid
Children are a lot of responsibility. Although you’re managing the 1 pretty well perhaps he doesn’t feel the same. It can be overwhelming especially to new parents. Your husband is probably still adjusting to the new setting and I would give it time. Why not seek couple’s therapy and see where that goes?
“HE’S PERFECTLY HAPPY”
That says it all, he is happy the way things are
Maybe he just doesn’t want anymore. He shouldn’t have to give a reason why. You should either respect his decision or leave…
You shouldn’t try to force him to have a baby he doesn’t want.
This probably should’ve been spoken about before you two got married
It doesn’t have to make sense to you. If he doesn’t want another kid, it could be simply bc he doesn’t want another kid.
Why does hun saying he doesn’t want another kid not good enough for you? It doesn’t have to make sense to you. But you’ll should have talked about how many kids you wanted prior to getting married. Some people only want one child.
Your kid is only a year old!!! Relax!! Plus he has right not want another kid. The are a lot of work
This is something requiring two people to be on board with 100%. He’s allowed to not want another child, just as much as you’re allowed to want another child. Time will help you determine if this can be resolved. Having another child too soon may be overwhelming for him. Whatever you do, drop the pressure and try to work on your connection as husband and wife. There might be other reasons why he’s hesitant to have another, and you owe it to your marriage to find out what that is.
Also, why are you doing all of the work of raising your first child alone? It sounds like you’re running yourself ragged. Can you imagine taking care of 4 with little to no help? Yourself, your one year old, a new child, and your husband - without his help? Seems like some things need to be addressed over there!
Some people don’t want kids or don’t want more than they have and that’s ok. There doesn’t have to be a specific pinpoint reason that you can fix. He may just not want anymore.
Your child is only one so still full on,give it a couple years and mention it again,maybe he just doesn’t want another child and he really shouldn’t be forced to have another if he doesnt
thinking you don’t need him
He feels what he feels I guess. No right or wrong here with either of you.
Thats it. There’s nothing to understand. He doesn’t want one
Oh sweety, is he worried that if you have another baby he’s getting replace with a proper child…
my bet is your manchild is secretly jealous.
I think he’s smart. Everyone wants a ton until they go through the baby stage, toddler stage, and then kid stage. Babies are the EASIEST. I wanted kids back to back. I thank God I didn’t because when they become toddlers, that 1 child will have you running ALL day, nonstop. I have a 3 yr old and I couldn’t imagine having another baby right now because the toddler literally requires 24/7 attention & assistance; even more than a baby. Babies just eat sleep and poop. Get to the toddler stage first, that’s my advice. He probably knows it’s gonna get harder.
My wife wanted another one. I did not. We had one anyways (yes I told her I did not want one). Now I resent her. Love our baby but I am not happy.
I am not seeing what YOU get out of being a mother.
You might want to stop to think about what you’re really saying right now. You’re basically making it sound like he does nothing for the child you have so it shouldn’t matter to him anyways. Like he’s a sperm doner basically… if that’s the case I wouldn’t be very surprised if he doesn’t want another. And if it isn’t the case then he is taking on some sort of responsibility for the baby you already have then it’s fair for him to say he doesn’t want to take on any more responsibility right now.
Multiple kids is A LOT of work. Why would you want to add more to your plate being the head of the household?
People have different desires and opinions about current situations. You’re looking at things from your perspective. His perspective and desires are different. Maybe he just wants to enjoy this child for a while. Maybe he’s realized that parenting isn’t as fun as you think it is. Maybe he’s feeling disconnected from you now that there’s a 3rd person in the house and doesn’t want to add to that by adding a 4th. There’s a lot of reasons why he could be feeling the way he does. What is important is that you respect his feelings and don’t force on him something he’s stated clearly he doesn’t want. You could destroy your relationship with him if you push your wants and desires on him and try to force him to want what you want.
What a twisted way to think. You do certain things for him so that equals you must have another baby?! My God. Enjoy your time with your little one and maybe in a get years you can revisit a discussion about it. But you’re looking at a divorce at this rate.
Sometimes that last baby is one too many and destroys the relationship. Be happy with what you have or find someone else that is willing to deal with the multitudes of stress it brings for the rest of their lives
Some people just don’t want multiple kids. He may be one of them…although why you’re trying to have a second kid with someone who sounds like they don’t even pull their weight in the house is beyond me.
And yes it could also be a monetary thing because he’s thinking future and with the way things are climbing…
enjoy your time with your baby, give it time
If it was you who didn’t want the second baby would you be asking yourself these same questions?
I feel you… I wanted my kids close in age but that didn’t happen. It took my husband 4 years with our first to finally want a second… and then we had unexplained infertility which took us 3 years to conceive our second so now there’s a 7 year age gap 
they’re still best friends and amazing together but I would have much preferred them closer in age.
I knew I wanted another baby when mine was one but we both wanted more time- my husband wanted more time than me and we both were ready when she was 2.5 yrs old. I think its just a big dynamic change in life and your relationship. We needed time to enjoy our first and adjust to life changes and find our routine together as a couple and family of 3. Financially it plays a role as well no matter who makes the majority of the money, alot of money goes to childcare expenses. The only way you will really know is if you just talk to him and ask what his concerns are or why he feels that way/ when he thinks he might be ready. It has to be when you both are ready and I felt a little disheartened by waiting on my husband to be ready with our second and third now on the way- each time it took him longer to feel ready than me, but it happened when it was best for us both. Hopefully you can talk through it and see both sides way of thinking so you can move forward!
Two babies in diapers just a couple years or less apart is HARD girl! Your situation may work well now but add another child into the mix it won’t be so easy! I say this from experience. Be careful what you wish for, what’s the rush? Give it another year or even two so you can balance everything out a little. Enjoy the little one you have now, because another one on top of it will make that very hard. Give him some time
Maybe it’s a little to early for him. You still have a baby. Give it a couple of years.
I think you said it yourself . He’s perfectly happy
If he says no, then there is nothing you can say that will validate your argument. He said no. It’s his sperm. His choice.
Bc he’s not ready at this time. It’s out a like it’s just a time thing for him not that he said no completely. So ask him when he’d like to revisit the topic and then wait until then. Both partners should be onboard with a planned baby. Don’t manipulate and harass to get what you want. You will have to be patient I know I know it’s not easy but your gonna have to suck it up or risk damaging the relationship permanently.
He’s allowed to feel that way. It’s normal. You just had a baby. Give him time to breathe between babies. Try to focus on something else. Work towards a goal together instead.
Reread your post…it is all about you… what you do…what you want… and stands to reason your relationship is like this… check yourself before he does. Life isn’t all about you hun…and he isn’t your lil robot…pet… prisoner.
To soon, give it time
A one year old is plenty. He might feel guilty because of all yhe responsibility that you already have.
Could be a multitude of reasons. Baby’s only a year old and might not want one that close in age, could be money, could be he only wants one kid, might wanna wait until she’s older etc.
Give it time, he’s just enjoying the time he has with her while she’s that little. He’s likely not ready and that’s okay but you can’t keep pushing him.
I want a third and my husband doesn’t. So we compromised at having two. Put yourself in his shoes cause if this was him pressuring you for a second kid and you didn’t want one everyone would rally for you. So now he doesn’t want a second for whatever his reason is right now, time to back off a bit and bring it up at a later time. 
But if the rolls was reversed and you didn’t want more kids and he had this same fit it would be “my body my choice” if he doesn’t want anymore then he gets to make that decision.
If he doesn’t want another baby you can’t force him ! Maybe he’s content with how things are! Your making it more of a big deal than it should be.
Enjoy your life with your babygirl!
Stop forcing it
My experience is that men don’t want the consequences or results of making babies, they are only interested in attempting to make them.
It’s only been a year. Maybe he just wants to enjoy his wife and his child for a little while. If a guy posted this, everyone would lose their mind about pressuring the wife and her body her choices.
Sounds like he needs to pitch in more this is 2023
He’s happy, you’re happy, why does having another baby so soon have to happen. Just enjoy the moment and this time. Adding a stressor of another baby isn’t worth your family happiness. Re- explore the idea of another baby in a couple of years.
My question is why are you doing everything and working and he stays home.???
Your the breadwinner does he work?? Unfortunately you can’t force him. I would keep bringing it up. Keep talking about it maybe he’ll change his mind.
Sounds like you already have a second child. If he doesn’t work, take care of his own child, or do any household chores, what exactly does he contribute to your marriage?
Have you asked him if it’s a timing thing or if he’s one and done?