My husband is constantly on video!

Im so sick of my husband constantly playing video games. No matter how many times we talk about him limiting he doesnt care, he’s always out of bed at night and always wants to play, i have to drag him to hang out or go out somewhere, im always stuck taking care of our daughter, even when he “watches” her hes still on the game and im just so sick of being disrespected and questioned on why I feel a certain way about it. We literally have to be up early in the morning to drop my car off and hes still playing while our child has woken up so many times and of course as always im putting her back to sleep.


Story of my life!!! I feel this :100:


Depending on the age of your daughter just let her sit up with him and you go bed. Don’t invite him to dinner you go and let him fend for himself. Until his life is affected he’s not going to change


My husband plays at night about 8ish I do not care😂


How you start is how you finish. He was on games when you met him and while you dated him NOW you want to change him

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You need to find a hobby. I read and my husband puts together model cars. You don’t need to be joined at the hip. Everyone needs space. Or learn to play the games and play with him.


You figure out his favorite online game. You learn how to play it. You don’t tell him. Wait for the perfect moment and destroy him in the game world.

Cards on the table time. You married a man child.

I play yoshis island and super Mario

Sweetie you both are worth more than he’s giving. My advice is to tell him to be there with and for you both or get out. That’s a mess of a life.

1st how old is your daughter. 2nd go out and have your fun with friends, it may wake him up. Or you can leave.

I would suggest 2 or 3 days each week that is either date night/ family time. Simple


Video games will always be there for him, perhaps you should try indulging and take an interest in playing some yourself and play together

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This is an addiction and he needs to have a rock bottom.
Forget about changing the wifi, pawning his console, or screaming at him. You’re not his mama and he’s not a child.
Better yet, kick him out.
Until he gets help and stops playing altogether (because I believe with an addiction like this there is no moderation) just tell him you’re done. Ignoring the child while he plays is dangerous. Ignoring you id beyond disrespectful.

Been there done that. It doesn’t get better. I’ll never be with someone who’s a gamer ever again. I would leave. Being a single parent is easier. I promise.


Was he like that before you had a child ? It sounds like he is still immature and the only way to find out if he is willing to change is to tell him to make the choice of playing video games less to save his relationship or move out ! I think young women need to stay non committed for longer until what is called the honeymoon phase is over and you see what the guy is really like. The attention and effort alot of young men give will only last at the start of a relationship. I hope he can become the man and father he needs to be.


Life is honestly too short to be unhappy. If you can’t get him to understand that you and your daughter needs to take more of a priority then I would be telling him that I am done. My husband plays games but only if we have nothing on, by his own choice. He needs to understand that he’s creating an unhappy home environment, whether he thinks it’s excessive of not is not an option when it is affecting your life too. It’s selfish. Good luck :slightly_smiling_face:

he’s got to start balancing and outting focus in all parts of his life and home. if he can’t understand that, leave and let him figure out if he wants to get help for this addiction he has. only he can want that.
I’m a gamer, but I got a job family and responsibilities before I play

Whether its escapism or passion for the game its still lighting up the amygdala region of his brain giving his reward circuitry a much bigger charge than interacting with you and your daughter could ever give him, without addiction treatment you are looking at your future


I love video games and play often when I can. But there’s a time to play and a time to be a parent and a partner. Obviously he’s refusing to give up some of his game time in order to provide the emotional labor he’s supposed to in those other two roles. If he refuses, even after the talk, i would leave. You’re already doing it all on your own anyways, you and your daughter both deserve to find someone who will put y’all ABOVE their hobbies.


Life with men your not the only one


“he’s always out of bed at night”? Bed times are set by parents not spouses. That statement makes you seem like a control freak.

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For the ladies saying break it dont(they are expensive) unhook and hide it somewhere and maybe suggest couples counseling to get it back to see if you can get to the root of it. Playing a video game for a couple of hours or 1hr is fine its a great way to blow of steam and destress that’s what I do.


Sounds like he’s addicted. Think you need to give him an ultimatum you are worth so much more. He sounds like a boy rather than the nan and equal partner that you need

Sounds like you married an immature child…good luck! :rofl:


Gamer… what year is this 1997? :joy::joy::joy::joy::joy: That’s all you have. Someone who watched television is called a visioner at this point. Because everybody plays a video game.

Chances are if he spends that much playing video games he probably has to see a therapist. Usually it can be a sign of depression or anxiety issues or things that are happening outside of the video game. Because video games Are used as an escape from reality.

There is also such thing as video game addiction. Which is very different from even a hardcore gamer. So it’s important to check all the boxes

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Sounds like he is not vested in being a husband or father anymore. He’s got to go. You are doing it yourself anyway

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I know the feeling. HATED IT. He abandoned me during and after my pregnancy to play with his friend sometimes not coming home until he was about to go to work. he ignored us and did until I kicked him out for MANY reasons. WE hated it still do but glad we dont have to deal with it anymore. He can be the next girls problem with his anger issues and bad habits.


Sit down with him and have a serious conversation about it. I’m sure you’ve talked to him before and YOU have been serious, but he obviously did not take you seriously. Tell him if he doesn’t severely limit game time and start treating you and his daughter like a priority you’re done. Tell him everything you are feeling and going through like the fact he is basically making you be a single mother because he isn’t being a husband or a father. I wish you the best of luck. You deserve so much better, please don’t accept that treatment from anyone :heart:

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Well I’m sure you knew alllll of this before you decided to have a kid and get married yet you decided to ignore it. You married a man child. Leave and let him see what life is like without his family. He will either make the necessary changes or continue making his life about video games. He most likely won’t change though and it will only get worse. You’re better off a single mom.


Was he “on the game” when you married him? My guess is yes… girl, you knew what you were getting into


Video games are legitimately addicting. They activate the same reward sensors in our brains as cocaine. They give us dopamine, and it sounds like he has a problem.


I’ve got zero issue with gaming UNTIL it becomes the priority over other responsibilities. And if he’s consistently is letting your daughter down and letting you down then you need to tell him if he’s not interested in changing his habits then you’re done because there’s no point in him being in the house but being an absent father and partner at the same time. I dont like ultimatums but some times you can’t avoid them. If you aren’t happy and your daughter only has mum to rely on then why the heck should you put up with it?


Did you not know he was a gamer BEFORE?:woman_shrugging:


Time to give him a choice. You or the games.


Disconnect the Internet .


Addiction comes in many ways.
You’ll talk till you blue in the face!

You guys tell her to break to break it, but that means he’s allowed to break her things, right? Plus, this will cause him to leave her or maybe even abuse her. It’s best to just plan the exit from the relationship or start playing with him.

Do you have hobbies that you enjoy doing? It may be his stress relief or only way of having fun while playing something.


The woman SHOULDN’T leave. So please stop telling her to leave. He is the one that needs to go away. I’d change the house/apartment locks and put all his possessions and games on the front porch or in his car. Buy a new car and hide the keys. If he harasses you, call the police. Or go see your pastor or bishop for advice.

It doesn’t get better… just start making plans to move on.

Bunch of miserable future single moms in here. :joy::joy:


Learn to play. Go to counseling. Find other hobbies you both enjoy. Ask about his day to help him open up.
My spouse and I both play, it can be a great date night in when we don’t have a sitter.


There is a difference between playing games and being a responsible adult. It doesn’t sound like he is a responsible adult. Tell him it’s time to grow up .


Sounds like you are married to my ex-husband.

Deliver him an ultimatum. Ask him to choose get some addiction help and limit his gaming time to something more acceptable for your family, or leave.
It can have a positive outcome.


The only thing you can do is stop dealing with it. Leave him. Obviously he isn’t listening to you or even cares. Show him you won’t deal with it anymore.


Break it in front of him! :woman_shrugging: show him it isn’t a joke! :woman_facepalming:

forget to pay the wifi bill :woman_shrugging:t4:

I game and so does my oh. However we have 4 kids between us 1 being a baby and he will still help even if he’s in middle of gaming he will stop and help especially if an emergency. He doesn’t nessesarily have to stop gaming but yes he definitely needs to limit down how much he’s on for.

Change the Wi-Fi password & don’t tell him it OR put a little lock on the end of the cord so he can’t plug it in.


He has an addiction. He needs professional help.

I know how you feel girl I’m ready to smash my man’s xbox.

Would you rather him be out at the club? Or would you rather see your man at peace in your own house safe and sound? Maybe he actually deserves better.


Leave. It’s possible to he a gamer and a functioning member of a family. He obviously doesn’t care enough to change.


I was married to a man like your husband. We had to kids together. It was like having three kids. We divorced as I didn’t look at him as a mate anymore, more like an additional large child whom I was EXTREMLEY annoyed with. Talk to him, get some counseling, it may help.

He could be out all night at the bars drinking and hooking up with other women. At least you know where he is and what he’s doing. He’s not getting into trouble with the law either.
He’s not doing drugs or breaking into places stealing, he’s not gambling all your money away at casinos or scratch off tickets. Maybe not as bad as you make it out to be.
Always 2 sides to a coin


You have an extra kid… not a partner.
Less work without him…


Run, honey. Run. If he provides, he can pay child support. Move along. He’s a loser.

I feel your pain.
The darkest years of my marriage was when my husband was addicted to video games. This day right here, I was ready for WHATEVER.
I told him “either you stay with me and your unborn child or you leave and never come back, but you can’t have us both anymore, decide tonight”.
And that was it. He came to his senses.
I know some women might say “ oh playing twice a week isn’t that bad, or I rather have him playing at home than out at bars etc…” let me tell you, that until you are STUCK with a man child who doesn’t do ANYTHING but playing this thing, you don’t know what you’re talking about.
I spent thousands in marriage counseling, years of him promising to play just a few nights a week etc…
Video games is another destructive addiction just like drugs. It has the power to destroy families.

The people saying to give ultimatum, guess what he’s gonna choose the video game cuz it’s been there for him way before he ever met you :melting_face:


Pack up and leave, don’t tell him. He’ll figure it out eventually

And this is exactly why I don’t allow game systems in my house and never will

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He might be a video game addict. Seek help from a therapist.

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Leave if your not being respected he won’t change

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Is this not something you realized before y’all got married? :eyes: gamers don’t just spawn overnight.


He clearly has an addiction. If he won’t do anything about it then you need to leave, it won’t get better.

Video games can be as addictive as drugs, alcohol or gambling. You need to get him some professional help if you can. Otherwise he will not change and may get worse unless some significant life event snaps him out of it. I pray for you and your daughter. You both deserve better than hes willing to give at this point.

He’s obviously got a problem- children get “addicted” to the thrill of video games, your husband is probably getting a similar reaction. He found something that makes him feel relaxed and connected.
May consider hiding the cord and he can play a predetermined times-
It’s like he’s a child and is having difficulty finding a healthy balance- sadly people struggle with playing on their phones, watching tv, playing video games- alcohol, sugar- it’s all about sparking the reward center of our brains!
Recognizing the problem is always the hardest part, but crucial to making lasting changes.

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cut the cord to the game system. Jeebuz. If your man child is acting like a man child, treat him like one. FFS


Scientifically Craig Zimmerman is correct that the husband is receiving positive response and addiction reinforcement through the amygdala responses. Chemical and behavioral studies can all be found in the book Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Coleman. I highly suggest you invest in buying this book and the time in reading it while you work on this problem. It will help you learn about yourself, him, others, and how to deal with all sorts of problems currently and going forward. Everyone has their thing. Some men choose to watch sports, play on social media, square up their fantasy sports instead of going to bed with their lady. Then turn around and complain when your tired and they don’t get what they want on their watch. You can’t win. By reading the book the you can at least gain understanding of yourself first before pointing fingers at others. That’s more fair right? Then maybe after that read the five language of love and have him fill out the survey to determine his languages. If you don’t know each others languages it’s like swinging a dead cat and expecting to win something. And that didn’t make any sense. Try to point out that both of you should do one of those things for each other once a week. Love and relationships take work. I wish they didn’t but they do. If you both can’t work at it you can’t blame each other for anything. After some time if you are showing proof of the language exchanges sit down and talk to him about how every night the games bother you and it would be nice if three times a week you would go to bed together and see how that works. Then see where it graduates. And in this whole meantime definitely don’t get pregnant. If you are not seeing eye to eye this is not the time to add to a family that is not in team player mode. If that ends up working out and the sex time gets better you are forming a pattern so don’t push it. Generations are different. Depending on your age this might be what is. If you can make an improvement I would practice this and commend him and show your appreciation of his time. And really focus on those love languages.

He is a grown man. Wife’s don’t get to tell husband when to play. If he works then get off his back. He could be out chasing women


Honestly he could be doing worse…


This addiction is destroying families. It does change ones brain.

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Tell him it goes to the pawn shop or the tub. Period. He can leave but he wouldn’t leave with it know this. He’s grown and should have priorities top ones being you and his child. I’ve seen so many relationships end bc of this smh it’s so petty and people need to grow tf up and prioritize properly and accordingly.


Honey you don’t have a husband you have another child.


You’re married to a boy not a man. I personally wouldn’t put up with it. He’s choosing that over you and your child.

You have 3 options

  1. Leave
  2. Play
  3. To provoke a accident that will damage the console .

In my case , because I’m a Latina from PR and we usually do not have a lot of patience I would have already broken it by throwing it on the floor


Throw that system in the trash!

I’m sorry you feel stuck with your Daughter, dump that POS.

It’ll NEVER stop get used to it :joy:

He can be addicted to other things what seems like a curse might be your blessing .


Just give him a good boot in the arse n say parent the fkn kids :joy:

At least he’s on the game and not on ho bags and out and lying to you. He’s home. Annoying. But home.

Get a divorce and marry an actual man next time . Good riddance

There’s the door loser if he doesn’t respect you or daughter, sadly you are already a single parent

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Find a real man one that doesn’t play video games.

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People can laugh all they want but when you have a husband that is that obsessed it definitely is a problem. He’s a grown man with responsibilities. Game a few hours a night before bedtime is cool. Whatever. He deserves to festers too. But when it consumes you and gets in the way of even the child it’s a problem. Clearly, the talks aren’t working so it may be time to either be really dramatic so he finally wakes up or tell him the games need to go until he can be an adult and prioritize. 

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This was my life. Only I was the gamer. Pick up a controller instead of acting like one!!! AW I ranked 3rd in The World with my Clan. I placed 13th in The World as an individual.

Gaming online is fun. But at least we’re at home and not out running around!

When you join a Clan, clan is life. Soon as you hop online, they own you. You stop playing with regular friends.

I took three months off but only bc of an accident. I’ll be back online soon.

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My husband does this constantly on his days off and as soon as he gets home from work and quite honestly it’s to the point where I’m about to file for divorce because of it I’ve put up with it for 5 years he seems to think that they are more important than communicating or his marriage

Does he work? If he doesn’t then yeah it’s a problem, but if he works and is the bread winner let him live ! He’s at home, safe and with you at the end of the day. My husband works full time, I stay home and take of the kiddo and the responsibilities that need done. If my man wants to come home and play his game til bed time or whenever he feels like it so what.

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Have you asked him how he’s feeling? Or are you just griping at him?

You’d be surprised how many cope with escaping reality by gaming

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Why is the console still in the house? Throw it in the trash. Install a camera in your living room and leave him with the baby while you check into a hotel for 24 hours and get some sleep. The camera is for the child’s safety to make sure he’s not playing games on his phone or dozing off because he isn’t sleeping. It’s also for evidence legally if you 2 chose to separate and he tries to fight for custody.

I’m not against video games but I’m not arguing with a grown man about his responsibilities. The way I see it, you’re already a single parent and you might as well be living on your own. It would probably be less headache for you.


It’s better than him being at a bar :heavy_heart_exclamation:. Get use to it now , mom’s do most of everything for the kids

Sit the baby down next to him… take the hdmi cord and go to sleep😂

If you have sat him down, And clearly communicated You’re NEED for HIM to be a Participating Partner and ACTIVE PARENT to NO Avail, STOP saying Anything. Slap his Ass so hard with Divorce papers he chokes on his TEETH. You really Need to be HONEST with yourself. WHAT would you be Losing besides 200lbs of Dead Weight?

We all have faults. If he isn’t drinking, doing drugs or being abusive towards you or her then you should be grateful. After you realize that, you should consider that fact it could be how you approach him about the matter. The issue could be the atmosphere when you guys are together. Relationships are work and are forever changing. Help him through this time by being more positive. Reflect on the time when you were dating and help him remember this time too. I promise you if you are coming him like a parent would, you are wasting your time. That would be creating resentment towards you.


Yall this ain’t hard, unplug it and trash it. I’d sling it across the yard and run it over but that’s just me. My patience is thin and I’m crazy. Seriously…
Stop allowing grown men to act like kids.
What you tolerate will continue.

If you don’t want to leave, stop begging for his attention. Let him pay the bills and you and your daughter go about life without him. He will either miss you and join you or you can have a life with your daughter using the only thing he will give you, his money. Or leave.

If he wants to act like a kid then treat him like a kid. Hide the controllers until he does his husbandly chores and put a password and time limits on that device so he can’t play it all the time.
Me personally, I would divorce a man that acted like this before I would tolerate this or go about trying to be his mother.
But, I imagine you knew he had a gaming addiction before you married him and had a child with him.