My husband told me to hire a sitter and go out...what should I do?

Hire a sitter and go out…
And then hire a sitter for another day to clean :woman_shrugging:

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You can split the time and organize something then go out and have some you time. Or one week you organize and the next you go out. You might finding being out is a good thing for you. He wants to do something nice for you so do it.

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Maybe he think pampering yourself makes you more attractive and appealing rather than going from one project to another

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As nice as a pampering sounds, I understand where you are coming from. Those treatments may feel good at the time, but having an organised pantry or wardrobe is like a gift that keeps on giving. I too enjoy that rewarding feeling. If I were in your shoes, I’d compromise. Instead of spending the money/time on pampering, I would go out and spend it on organisational stuff to bring home and enjoy next time you get a chance to do the pantry/wardrobe/etc.
I know it feels like a real treat having the perfect storage tubs, hangers, labels etc, all nice and matching. To me, that would make me happier for longer. So even if you come back, the sitter leaves, and you’ve run out of time… you can feel good knowing time wasn’t wasted, and soon all those purchases will be put to use, and that’s exciting :grin:
Plus I’m sure it would feel great shopping without distractions, and completely focusing on the products you’d like for your next “project” after checking out some inspiration online.

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Maybe skip a week of a nanny and save up for someone to tidy up as well…you deserve it!!!

Go get pampered guurrrrlllll,let hubby join.

I say do whatever makes you happy. I love a clean, organized place, so I get it.

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Appreciate that your husband can see you need a break . Take it , what’s one day gonna do to your routine . You’ll be fine , and hubby obviously feels some type of way about you not having “YOU TIME”

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He thinks he’s helping you by suggesting going to have time for yourself. Let him know how you feel. I think he’s concerned your not taking care of…you. He loves you obviously and cares for you. You are blessed with a caring husband.

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Book a facial/ massage/ pedicure n go out for a meal with friends

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He sounds like a gem - He loves and cares for you. GO and enjoy yourself.

For both! If you can afford to do it twice a week say on Tuesday organize and then pamper yourself Thursday. You need both. Or do a longer amount of time on onr e day to do both but I’d split it up if I were you.

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Rotate…one week go do something for you outside of the home and then do a project or something that’s for you the next time?

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I would make a hair and pedi appointment and take time for myself! As a mom of 8 awesome kids (only two left at home) that time is the most treasured time that almost never happens. And if your husband is for it all the better. Self care is so important besides the closest and cleaning will always be there.

It takes getting used to doing things like that but I started dedicating time to myself and it’s really nice for a change

I do that too but ii do both i like to get my nails done because i f it up in 30 seconds not touching anything

I feel this! There is nothing like a clean organized house! It’s the greatest gift you can give yourself! You feel accomplished, helps you feel like you can take on the world, makes your life easier, you feel like it’s a wonderful environment for your baby to play and a peaceful place for your husband to come home to. Now think all that about yourself. Maybe letting go and just enjoying yourself will allow you to have some much need rest and peace. You can come home, be ready to play with your baby and have some much needed energy, that’s comes from getting a little “you” time to really enjoy your husband. You sound like such a hard worker and an amazing mom and wife! It’s okay to just do for you. :heart: take a moment and then get back in there and organize!! :heart:

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Hire a house cleaner :woman_shrugging:

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I truly think your husband is right and is very sweet for thinking of you and wants you to do for you. How about you at least once a month or twice you hire a babysitter twice. One day to clean the next for you time. Maybe your husband could also skip a day at work and you both go have quality time together. A few hours will do your mind and body good. The work will always be there no matter what you do or don’t do.

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Hire a cleaning person and sitter

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Go out at least once a month.x

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I say get someone to watch her 2 days a week 1 week out of the month. Get your cleaning done then go the next time and have ur personal self care day :heart: sounds like your husband is a good man and sees you deserve time for yourself!

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Good for you, if you know a single mom who doesn’t get any of this maybe include her because what you’re being offered is rare.

Do it!!! Your husband is right in saying to take some time for you. However, I understand where you’re coming from also. I haven’t really had time for me in years because I don’t take it. Burn out is real and it will catch up with you!!

If you can afford 2 x sitter days

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What ever in the hell I want to do!!!

Take Hubby’s advice. Take some time off and recharge.

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Hire someone to organize your pantry or do a deep clean then too, if that brings you peace

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Pay the sitter to stay longer, clean then go for a mani pedi

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Does your husband have Tourettes Syndrome? If not, get a babysitter and go out.:person_shrugging:
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Please go to the spa and do some shopping, you are probably looking tired and need some new clothes after the baby and your husband is trying to get u to see that u need to care for u as well.

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Take some time for yourself, sometimes it’s not bad to remember your also your own person.

You may find you will enjoy getting out more than you thought. Try it, you can organize the next time!

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Definitely go out and have some me time. I get where you are coming from but you do need more of break from “mom” duties. There will always be a time to cook, clean and organize but not enough time for yourself.

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Girl put your feet up and take some time for yourself…sounds like you’re overworking yourself. Take his advice :raised_hands:

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Do what is going to make you feel productive, less stressful, and whatever brings you the most joy!

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Omg what a great idea!!!:stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye::open_mouth: I’m so stealing these ideas for the future!!! Heck yea!!!

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If I had a husband still and he told me that, I wouldn’t hesitate even if that meant I was going out by myself lbvs to do nothing more then take a walk have a meal or twiddle my thumbs while sitting on a park bench lol I’d find something anything. you need you time, Outside of your family and organizing cleaning your house. That’s really all he’s saying to you. Is that you deserve more that you deserve to spoil yourself and do something fun. organizing and doing projects around your house might bring you peace and contentment but they shouldn’t be the only things that bring you peace and contentment. I do get it tho I’m a homebody by nature and love to dive deep into my family and house projects I find it fullfilling. Though I will say there is something to be said for finding the time to focus on nothing and no one else’s needs and wants except your own., And you don’t even have to find the time your have a partner in life who said baby get a sitter once a week so u can do what you wanna do go have fun yada yada etc lol. Man where can I get me one of those? :slightly_smiling_face: Lol. Try something simple this first time pick a restaurant or something you’ve never done, we have local wine and canvas night events 1st Friday events every month downtown etc. stuff like tht where I live. Maybe find something like that and go it might be fun. Take your hubby’s advice and go treat yourself. It’s good for you.

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I completely get what you’re saying about feeling good when things are organized, and not being able to relax and enjoy your me time when you know those things aren’t getting done.
What if you have someone come two different times one to get your tasks done. And then when you’re at peace with that you can go a different day to pamper yourself, and relax, which is also important for stress relief.

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Does toddler nap? Is toddler on a tight schedule for bedtime? Those were the times I did housework or had alone time. They were both in bed at 8pm, that gave hubby and I time to catch up, watch tv, or each of us do what we wanted to wind down from the day. I’m trying real hard to understand how things have changed so much since ours were toddlers. I very much encourage you to start with a bedtime routine now while he’s a toddler. Get that in motion now so when he starts school, there won’t be any fussing with bedtime.

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Get the sitter and have a spa day…get some rest mama!!!

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Follow the directions. Ask for smaller words if one confused you.

Hire a bi weekly house cleaner to take care of the cleaning and treat yourself!

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Girl, go out and do whatever u want! So many of us would love for what u are asking for! Go amd do u! I recently started making sure i get a girls day evey 6 weeks or so. Took me over 16 years!

I think you should try it and enjoy yourself! Self care is not a waste of time. He just wants you to take a break. The pantry organization can wait :woman_shrugging:t3: or if those things really bother you, hire her and extra day that week.
There’s nothing wrong getting a pedicure

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Why can’t your husband stay with the baby while you go take time for yourself?

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Whatever makes you happy, maybe alternate once in awhile for a change of pace.

Get a sitter for 2 days. One day so you can clean, and the day after to go relax

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I’d say whatever makes you happy :slight_smile:
But honestly yes get away a time or two and just be alone that day of cleaning can still be done another day. Pampering yourself you don’t always get to do :slight_smile:

Instead of hiring a baby sitter while you clean, why not hire a cleaner so you can go out and spend 1 on 1 time with your toddler?
But I do agree with your husband. Take a day for yourself too.

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Hire a cleaner instead of a sitter? :grimacing:

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Take the time!!! Even if it means hiring her another night for the tidying, or you could get a housekeeper to come in the same day

Self care is not a waste of time!!! Don’t feel silly doing normal things!!

Hire a sitter for an extra day, or hire a house cleaner. Or both.

GO OUT> Hire a House cleaner too

It just depends on how badly you want “me time” outside of the house.

Do both? If you want nice and to organize do them both! I see that’s he’s trying to make sure you’re getting you time but have you explained that organizing is your self care? I get it too I’d rather organize than get my nails done. When my house gets unorganized it doesn’t help my anxiety.

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Sounds like you have it made!! Money for cleaning? Heck yeah!! And some time off? Go!!!

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Go out and enjoy yourself

Man I would love to be told that lol.

So I mean how long do you have her for. Perhaps you can tidy up when the toddler is present try to sequester her to one area for damage control. Then when she gets her maybe spend 30 minutes to an hr on big ticket things like things that really really need to be done right then like a stain or dish pile up or whatever. Then leave. Go out for a few hours and spend some time alone. Honor your husbands wish because that was super thoughtful of him and he really wants that for you otherwise he wouldn’t of said anything. Then when you come home it’s not a super stressful environment.

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You cannot take care of everyone else unless you take care of you you deserve you’re the Mom but you deserve and thank God you have a husband that realizes that

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Self first home later. That’s why your burning out. It’s ok to treat yourself and delegate to make it easier. You work hard hun, go pamper yourself you earned and deserve it. Listen to what he’s saying, he wants you to enjoy yourself, he knows you deserve it too, don’t feel guilty, go, girls just wanna have fun grab your bestie and go :wink:

yes you need to make time for you.

Spend s few hours organizing, then go have a few hours of destressing. You can do both and you seem like you deserve it.

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Hire them for an extra couple of hours and do both. Clean and then go out and relax with mani/pedi or massage.

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I like to organize and clean too. It helps me mentally. Some women get the same feeling of relaxation with pedis. That isn’t me. I would never go for anything like that because I rather organize and clean in my free time while I listen to my sermons and spend time with god. Only you know what’s best for you. And you should have no guilt whichever way you choose to decompress and love yourself mama! Good luck

Ahh the privledged!

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Hire a baby sitter 2 days in a row. The first day clean, the next day relax and come home to a mostly clean place

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Hire a sitter for two days, one at home cleaning and one for the next day to go out and enjoy some relaxing “me” time!

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I would take the me time.

Treat yourself to lunch girl, completely solo! Scroll on your phone/online shop while you enjoy yourself.

Then go do a little stress-free shopping - Maybe get yourself a Starbucks Coffee or Tea.

Mani/Pedi is always a nice treat, but sometimes I feel like keeping up a conversation with the Tech is stressful - I just want to sit in silence and relax but there never seems to be a nice way to say that without offending someone…

Jake a second child to keep the only one busy.

Me personally, I would go have lunch with my husband.

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I had a mother who would go no where unless her house was perfect and believe me her husband did nothing to help with house or kids now my mother was the opposite as far as cleaning now our house was always in order but she never gave up a chance to go take every chance you can to get out and enjoy. My MIL WENT TO A FUNERAL AND CAME HOME AND SCRUBED every thing in the house I ask why her answer was when I die I don’t want people to say I was a nasty house keeper I said why should you care you’ll be dead and not know whT they’ll say if he pays to let you get out go worry about the rest tomorrow

Go eat something BY YOURSELF, that was something I loved to do. I had 3 boys and they always ate everything I wanted. So when I went out I made sure to eat something I really wanted and took the time to enjoy every bite.

Do it!!! Take care of yourself mama. I think it’s awesome that your husband is supportive of you doing this!

You could hire a cleaning service to come in while you’re gone? Maybe spend less while shopping to account for the cleaning fees? Then you get a stress free day and return to a clean home too! That is such a sweet gesture from your husband :heart:

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I had three toddlers & never hired someone while I cleaned. Go out. Have fun!

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Do what makes you feel good! Good hubby!

Lord if we all only had this issue! Lol Not trying to minimize your problem, but girl take some time for yourself if you feel you need it. It doesn’t have to be every time that you have the sitter over. Just when you need it. It’s sweet that your husband wants you to pamper yourself :heart:

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Thank your husband and be grateful. Then treat yourself once a month and clean the other 3!

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I cannot imagine hiring a babysitter so I could clean. Good for you. I think your husband just doesn’t realize how you feel about cleaning. He’s just trying to suggest a real break for you. If you’re content, just do your cleaning. There’s no point in going out and doing something for yourself unless it’s going to bring positivity to your mindset.

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Make it a date night.or better yet do what you want.

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We are also hiring a baby sitter so I can clean. I like things done a certain way and put away. I have 4 kids. I get out to shop when my husband gets home from work but to ask him to give up his time after work to help keep the house in order is not something that works for us. He has taken the last 3 weeks off of work to help deep clean every inch of the house. He took all the laundry I was behind on to a laundry mat. That is him showing me he loves me. I think it’s great to get out once and a while. I would definitely do once and see how you feel and if you like it do it once a month. It’s amazing how I feel when I get out and I’m not out shopping for the house or kids.

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Do a combination of both. Cleaning project one week, going out to a movie, lunch the next week. Let him know that both make you calm and happy. Tell him that you appreciate the suggestion of going out to do something for yourself. Both things are important. You will be happier.

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Definitely take some time to explore things you are interested in. While motherhood is the toughest yet most rewarding job, it is very easy to lose yourself in the day to day tasks.
My boss gave me a journal titled “Self-Care to do list”. I looked at it a few different days and kinda laughed it off thinking there’s no time for that, which translates to there’s no time for me.
After much reflection, I decided I will invest in myself. And so began a new journey of discovering a new me and a new lifestyle! We weren’t unhappy or anything before but now I am a better person/mother/wife for taking some time outside of day to day tasks. I get mani pedis from time to time and I went back to school. Life is so good! It’s a struggle for sure but don’t forget to take care of yourself too! And find something new to enjoy and fill your “personal investment bank”.

Momma - you need you time - apparently your wonderful husband sees it. Trust n believe it’ll be better for you - holistically- mind - body- soul. Maybe once every 4-6 weeks will do you wonder, young one. Just try it.

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What does the husband do on his time off? Maybe he could watch the child while you clean? Or maybe while you do something for yourself?

Ok so idea :bulb: pay for a cleaning service to stop buy one hour or something get the main stuff that bugs you while your home and then a baby’s sitter then Groupon your event to save cash sometime you can Groupon and coupon your first clean service as well you should definitely take this opportunity not saying doing it all the time but even once a year would be :pray:t2:

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Do it !
Have her stay longer or come on 2 different days !

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I would take advantage of it. My husband never tells me that.
I clean and run errands with my youngest with me. The older two are in school. I never get “alone” time

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Go out! Get some me time.

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Just hire the sitter for a longer period of time. Do your organizing and then head out to do something for yourself. Best of both.
I enjoy organizing and deep cleaning myself. If I do head out, I have no idea what to do lol, I just end up roaming Target with a latte and feel I wasted time as well. Self love comes in many different forms. It’s for you. So it’s really all about what brings you joy and peace.

I’d ask hubby too help tidy up the day/night before the sitter comes, than go spend that time doing whatever tf I want lmao.

Do both. Set some time to clean and the other to go take some you time.

Get up a little earlier and clean that day before the baby wakes up. Then when the sitter comes use that time to take care OF YOURSELF! We as moms need that too! We forget about ourselves soooo much!

Check around and see if you can find a Mother’s Day Out program. Drop off your toddler for a few hours and then you can clean the house in peace, or go out and enjoy yourself, or even both. :slight_smile:

Go fucking take care of yourself how is this even a question

A wise woman told me once that you have to Feed The Horse. You are the horse. Do not feel at all guilty for taking time for you. Sounds like you have a wonderful supportive husband, and I’m sure he will not mind if the pantry is perfectly organized. :heart:

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Go out. Are You OCD? You did rearrange your closet… and pantry… not Luke mop, stuff like that. Rearranging a closet doesn’t seem like your basic cleaning that you can’t get done. So hmmm… It’s nice of your husband to suggest this for you. If it was the basic cleaning that needed to be done it would be different. But if that’s what decreases your stress, then do what makes you happy. It just sounds OCD to me