We just received a letter that there is a no contact order in place for nursing homes that are allowing visitors. The ONLY way that they are allowed to let anyone see their loved ones is the facility has to be 21 days with no new positive tests. Everyone has to be screened going in for symptoms, and all meetings must take place outdoors. You must wear a mask and stay 6 feet apart at all times. I understand your point of view, as my fiance and my ex husband are both immunocompromised. However, if you abide by the rules and wash hands and faces regularly, I think it should be ok.
Wow! Family is family. Once they are gone THAT IS IT! Get over your pride.
3 Likes
I’m sorry so it’s fine to go visit your family but not his? Wow that’s crazy lol. Do you hear yourself right now?
5 Likes
You’re a bitch😂 it anyone should be worried it’s the nursing home. Wtf do you think is bringing covid-19 in? You and staff!
6 Likes
Yikes this women is up on a high horse… Get over yourself women 
6 Likes
If it’s that much of a problem then let him visit his grandmother without you, starters he’s a grown ass man who can see who he wants especially when it’s family, he would never forgive himself if he lost her and never visited because of you… so you’ll get the blame. At the end of the day his family is your family and visa versa your selfish at the fact he has to see yours but not his. Nope sorry, grow up if your that bothered don’t go with him simple as, and if your that bored when he’s gone then you visit your mum and then he’s not getting in the way of your quality time with your mum & yourself. X
My father lived in a nursing home and had no underlying health issues. A nurse who worked there brought COVID into the nursing home and 8 residents contracted COVID from her. My father died last month from COVID. If this were my family, none of us would be visiting a nursing home…
3 Likes
Bringing children into a nursing home during a pandemic would, imo, be inconsiderate if not deadly. Our elderly are our most at risk and little ones that’s socialize or go to day car or preschool are gonna be little petri dishes.
5 Likes
My mother works in a home and since covid there’s been way less deaths and people getting sick since they shut down to public, maybe just maybe we are the germ bags that are bringing in these “diseases”.
Imo. I wouldn’t go for the simple fact that I wouldn’t want to get them sick not the other way around, but if its something my husband felt he needed to do i would support him, mask up, wash up, go and keep distance.
1 Like
The homes are closed so you wouldn’t be allowed in anyway and if she is end of life it’s only family allowed in and that’s only certain amount
I doubt any nursing home would be letting children in!! Only next of Kin in most places and he may well have to book a visit!
4 Likes
Love how you assume its a breading ground for diseases. Most care workers have families ourselves
4 Likes
It’s not what you’ll catch from the nursing home that’s the issue, it’s what you’ll take in there. Simple solution. You go see yours, he goes sees his.
7 Likes
What a selfish cunt 
nursing homes are surprisingly much cleaner than the media had played out. because ALL residents are high risk, many more precautions are made just like in hospitals. times are tough, and yes it’s hard staying away from loves ones. I know each of you want to see family because the idea of death is imminent and a real threat. honestly, my personal opinion as a worker in a senior facility, family to a hospital worker, and very close with a grandmother who is high risk and if she were exposed wouldn’t be able to receive any treatment due to her severe allergies to many medications, my advise is for everyone to stay away from family. even severe measures may not be enough to protect those you love, your children included. consider that before making any visits to any members, as beloved or loathed as they may be
1 Like
He’s after the will, your children come first.
1 Like
Lol the nursing home isn’t the problem love. We are the problem! Don’t bring your germs in there to harm elderly you selfish swine. You sound like a real bitch if you ask me.
You go see your mom. He goes see his grandmother and the kids stay with someone while you go visit them. Kids shouldn’t go anyway with everything going on.
3 Likes
It’s an easy fix. Don’t take the kids.
You’re not wrong for feeling how you feel. Because of the pandemic, the facility should have something in place where visitors are limited or is it possible that yall can be outside her rooms window and she see them that way. You’re protecting everyone by being cautious and this also applies to your mom and grand mom too. Trust me take all steps in keeping your elderly family safe. My father is sickly and I gave in on father’s day and went and saw him. I went to be tested for covid a week later and I got a false positive, but because I was around my dad he had to stay home and miss his dialysis treatments twice until his results came back negative. Had I got him sick I would’ve never forgave myself. Since June I’ve seen him face to face twice, but call him daily. Just be careful. Praying for your family and extra love to your mommy 
Don’t know where you live but where I’m at we can’t see folks in the nursing home. We haven’t seen my father in law since March other than to wave at him from the window.
1 Like
Ask yourself this - if she died on Monday would you feel guilty over not letting him go and denying her the chance to meet your children? If you can live with that then I’d be more concerned with your lack of a heart than the virus.
I understand how hard it is to have a parent going through cancer treatments. My dad was diagnosed with and started treatment for prostate cancer shortly after the pandemic so we’ve had to go without seeing him as well but your mother has seen the kids in the last month and his great grandmother hasn’t. If you’re so concerned then quarantine from your mother for 10 days but as someone else said you can get the virus from the grocery store or anywhere else from that matter. To ask him to sacrifice this visit because of the virus you need to be willing to sacrifice leaving your house period because you can get it anywhere.
Also the fact that they haven’t gotten along is a moot point. She’s his family, and your children’s, just like your mother and grandmother are yours.
5 Likes
Patient’s are brought outside and you are far from them. No physical contact.
…i understand your concerns for your daughter and grandmother and mother… But. He needs to see his grandmother. If you feel like it’s that big of an issue quarantine him afterward for 10 days and don’t take him to your family. Honestly, if you’re going to get it, you’re going to get it. You could get it from the grocery store. Or your parents. This virus does what it wants to do. The seclusion is killing our nursing home residents quicker as well as those still living at home. Including my granny who just lost her husband of 63 years in November. Let him see her and go stay somewhere else if you’re that concerned.
6 Likes
Have him go alone and don’t bring up them not getting along. That isn’t your business.
8 Likes
No, and i think its a good compromise and should stand your ground.
Most nursing homes aren’t allowing anyone. As some who use to work in one… please do not go. Everyone in there is old and fragile. I’ve seen the noro virus/flu infect everyone in less than 3 days and it took weeks for some to recover and some never did.
If he wants to go let him go alone. But I would not go for the elders sake and your kids.
1 Like
He should understand that your willing to compromise but you can’t risk giving your mother anything whether he thinks she’s over dramatic or not. Your not denying him although you have good reason to deny your children from seeing her so I don’t see why this would end in an argument. Maybe I’m not quite understanding but it seems like your giving a logical compromise and he should understand your need and want to do it after seeing your mother
Nursing homes weren’t allowing visitors so that covid wouldn’t be brought in! This post is infuriating! I hope you don’t take your kids anywhere in public bc I assure they have more germs than a nursing home! A breeding ground?!?! WTF?!?
9 Likes
Most nursing homes aren’t allowing visitors right now
Let him go; don’t take your kids!
1 Like
What? Since when are nursing homes breeding grounds for germs? I understood being cautious of going to the nursing home when I first started reading, but that’s because I assumed you didn’t want to take your germ infested children to a nursing home to potentially get the nursing home residents sick. But you don’t want to go because you think your kids will get sick?? 
You are another level. Don’t go to the nursing home. And stay away from your mother while you’re at it.
5 Likes
Sometimes other people are more important then you.
That his grandmother. If she is on her last leg then amends should be made, if that what he wishes.
Your his partner, not his controller.
My husband and son have gone to a nursing home every weekend to see grandma.
Do you know how much it must suck to be in a home right now?
They visit outside and follow steps to keep everyone safe.
Its better then going out to Walmart, much safer.
My moms in a nursing home due to her MS. As of right now, they have it set up that you can visit out side for 45 minutes. You have to wear a mask that they provide, and they take your temp and ask some covid questions. And the residents are only allowed 2 people to visit (one at a time) on the inside. I’m the third born and can’t see my mom on the side (as of yet) because she had to choose only two people, so she listed my older two sisters. My moms pissed off because she had 3 kids. She was under pressure and had to choose. Every facility is different.
So, no that doesn’t make you inconsiderate at all. They obviously aren’t taking the extra precautions at that nursing home.
1 Like
As a former CNA, a lot of nursing homes are not allowing anyone inside to prevent risk of families exposing residents to the virus. They’re mostly doing window visits. I literally wasn’t even allowed to bring food or drinks inside from the outside. And nursing homes are NOT breeding grounds for diseases and infections. Anything that they get is usually from the hospital stays or from family carrying something or even from lack of proper care.
You are being inconsiderate. End of story.
5 Likes
Wtf is wrong with you
7 Likes
I agree with seeing her AFTER your mom/grandma, but also cal the nursing home because they may not be allowing normal visits right now anyway.
1 Like
Yes it does make you sound inconsiderate
2 Likes
Yeah, I do think you’re being inconsiderate. This may be his last chance to see her, and as of right now your mom is not in the same situation. Honestly, she shouldn’t have visits at all being so compromised by chemo. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with setting your mom first, however, be careful how you word that, because he very well could be pissed that you’re prioritizing your mother over his grandmother. He needs your support now, not your judgment. If the roles were reversed and this was your mom in the nursing home, you’d be there in a heartbeat. It sounds to me like he needs and is looking for some sort of closure. Let’s hope you don’t stand in the way of that, because if you do, he will forever blame you for it. Can you live with that? Can your marriage survive that? Quit thinking about you. It’s not about you. Your mom will be there. His grandmother won’t. You’re being selfish and shortsighted. If you dont understand why he wants to go, talk to him. Ask him to explain it. Then try getting off your high horse and putting yourself in his shoes.
4 Likes
Yes go visit,i have seen it to,i work with Amy,it is heartbreaking
1 Like
I work in a nursing home and they are not breeding grounds for diseases. Most nursing homes only allow one visitor at a time and the visitor and the family member they are seeing both have to wear mask and be 6 feet apart .
2 Likes
I hope you get put in a nursing home.
If he wants to visit, he should, if the nursing home lets him. I work in a nursing home and they do visits 6 feet apart. Nursing homes don’t carry diseases like you think they do… has he visited his grandma before? Has she had a recent decline or is she passing? It’s heartbreaking seeing residents in the nursing home cry bc their families aren’t visiting…
1 Like
Not only are you inconsiderate… you are so uninformed you sound ignorant.
1 Like
Nursing homes are closed because YOU are bringing the germs. Your children are way more germ infested than the nursing home
1 Like
Your mama clear passed that drama to you, girlfriend.
2 Likes
I work in a care center/nursing home an they are not breeding grounds for infections! We take pride in keeping the residents safe, in fact all our staff is tested twice a week so you need to let him visit these residents have not had visitor since March. The only people they see are staff members so get over yourself!!!
If he’s your fiancée he’s not your “husband”. And if you’re this controlling regarding his family you’ll probably always just be the baby mama til he gets someone else pregnant. If his grandmother dies without him getting to see her he will resent you forever.
1 Like
Tell him you and the kids will wave to her through the window and he can go in.alot of nh are still visting this way anyway. Explain to him your fears of getting something and taking it back to your mom.if he doesnt respect your feelings stick to your guns and do what is comfertable and right for you.
It sounds pretty inconsiderate. Bring up your concerns to him if they’re legitimate.
1 Like
Well I can tell you as a personal care giver for the elderly in an assisted living, these elderly people are depressed because they want to see their family! It is heartbreaking. Please be considerate and have compassion.
First off i highly doubt his gg is a horrible woman .whats to say your relative is not just as much of a covid threat whether she had chemo or not ?you need to lighten up . you seem very controlling . although i am sure it is merely out of concern for your children . go vidit grandmas stay 6 ft apart. Mask then when you go home sanitize . take a shower in dial soap all of you wash all laundry and dry. In a hot dryer. Clean the car down with alcohol because lysol is hard to come by . all of you stay for 14 days home and pray for the rest of us
3 Likes
Family is everything no matter what be there for one another. We can’t live our lives in fear just do the best you can to protect yourselves and there is nothing else you can do. You both need to stay close to your family especially in times like these.
1 Like
Listen you won’t be able to touch each other it has to be done through the nursing home that she lives in and you’ll view each other through a window.
As I work in a home, I can tell you that where I work, we are only allowing window visits. Resident in the inside of a picture window, family on the outside. Both have remote headphones/microphones to speak/hear each other. There is no face to face contact.
2 Likes
Praying for you and your family
You and your family are more likely to get your husbands grandma sick than vise versa. 
. Most nursing homes are window visit still. Don’t be that selfish wife, if your family can visit your people, y’all can visit your husbands family. Maybe he is trying to make peace before she passes.
2 Likes
You’re not being inconsiderate. You shouldn’t feel ashamed that you want to keep your children as safe as you can during all of this going on. You aren’t even denying to see his GGrandmother, you just don’t want to risk your mother’s weakened immune system with a trip to a nursing home first. And maybe the nursing home isn’t a “breeding ground” for this virus but older people in nursing homes unfortunately have been at a very high risk of contracting it and then it spreads like wildfire in there. It sucks but its the truth. I wouldn’t go or take my kids in there period, but you do what you think is safe for your kids.
I work in a nursing home and they aren’t allowing visitors unless one of our residents are actively dying, also why can’t he go by himself?