My husbands best friends new girlfriend is my husbands ex from high school (it’s been 10 years) so there are no hard feelings in the matter. But my issue is, this girl constantly stares at my husband every time we are hanging out…i get the weirdest vibe from her and i no longer feel comfortable about her being around my husband but dont want to tsay anythin so things are not weird for him and his best friend…what should I even do?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My husbands best friends girlfriend is his ex: Advice?
Just question it with her. Set boundaries maybe.
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Really OP? Are you REALLY SURE there’s no hard feelings in the matter? Cause it kinda seems like maybe there’s some hard feelings in the matter……
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Just smile at her, and touch him, kiss him, hug him, let her watch…
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Sure it’s not you that’s tripping.
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I mean if you feel uncomfortable your husband should respect that… hes your husband not your boyfriend.
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No, you need to say something or nothing will be done about it. Tell him to speak to his friend about how uncomfortable you are about him bringing your husband’s high school ex over to your home , like literally out of respect for his “best friend” he shouldn’t even be doing that …
Watch very carefully, if you feel like something is going on with her don’t let it go.

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Or just let her look and don’t touch. If he’s not looking at her the same way then maybe you’re worried for nothing.
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Maybe she’s with the friend as a way of getting back to your husband maybe he was the 1 who got away tbh I’d be uneasy about this expecially if your getting vibes from her xx
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The next time you catch her looking at your husband just say something to embarrass her and set boundaries, if you can’t stand up for yourself no body will
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You should def talk it out with him and let him know how you feel. See how he feels about the situation
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Just have a quiet word with your husband and tell him you’re uncomfortable re this woman. If he’s a decent man he’ll make sure he’s got very clear boundaries around her for your sake and his best mates. Then keep an eye on it
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I don’t trust anybody…
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Let it go
You should have complete trust in your husband or you shouldn’t be married to him
I wouldn’t say anything. It might be nothing.
Ignore it. If she trys to take him and he goes then she can have his cheating a**. Trust your husband. Who cares if you trust the girl.
When people say, fight for your spouse, that means fight through relationship problems, fight to be the best spouse you can be. Not fight other women for him. If he wants to stray, he will. And if he does, he ain’t worth it.
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Kindergarten at its finest
Hunny, I’m going to be straight with you I’ve been in stuck with the circle of friends and not meeting any of them or have met them before and not having any kind of feelings for them but my past couple relationships have been in the circle of friends living in a small town they grew up as friends and I feel like a bad person but half the time they grew up apart from each other and weren’t friends and now I’m 32 been married twice I married my son’s step brother without even knowing him but got divorced and now I’m with the group’s friend from like 10 years ago that my first husband knew and was in my wedding and my baby daddy knew it’s so weird I never plan it out this way things just happen.
I find it gross tbh, for any friend to hook up with besties exes. I mean, I could never ever picture myself with any of my man’s besties. 
. But I’d definitely tell hubby about the uneasy feeling and for him to relay that to his mate. I’d also keep an eye out for her. You just don’t know ones intentions.
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Even if she’s looking at him do you not trust your husband ?
Not gonna lie it’s a weird dynamic but she’s with his friend and obviously had no intentions on pursuing your husband
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I would tell her straight up and I would tell your husband no more. I’m sure if you had an ex boyfriend coming over he wouldn’t like it at all.
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I wouldn’t Trust them. been there got my T-shirt Wasn’t married though still didn’t end up Good.
When she stares, step in front of her gaze or go up to your husband an grab him, kiss him, smack his ass an look her straight dead in the eye.
I would ask your husband if he noticed her staring at him. Tell him it makes you uncomfortable. Ask him to say something to his friend about it. This girl is weird.
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Talk to your husband about how you feel… There is no harm in communicating with your partner.
You can fully trust your husband and still have a feeling of insecurity. You being a normal human being does not mean that you do not trust him. With that being said, lean into that trust and have a conversation with him about how it’s making you feel uncomfortable. I would also take it an extra step and have a conversation with girly to let her know that if she even remotely tries anything that you’re not playing games… but I’m petty 
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I wouldn’t worry, he’s yours now.
Tell him
Just what you told us
This is hard , i really feel like theres a 50 percent chance if not a littleore its you not her.
I have known sooo many women who over think and over react , it could be as simple as you not realizikg how much YOU are looking at her this she is looking back. Sometimes jealousy takes over our true intuition. But then again it could be true intuition and she is being odd.
Either way I think saying something is the wrong choice if she is up to no good it makes you sound weak “why are you looking at man” sounds 3rd grade, and if it’s nothing it sounds the same. Keep an eye on it but also try to be honest with yourself … it could be merely she is curious about him not daydreaming about doing it.
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If you’ve seen it, they’ve definitely seen it 
Don’t matter the years, women will prey
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Express that you get a weird feeling for her if you feel uncomfortable, you can set boundaries but you can’t tell people who they can and can’t be around, it’s not fair and leads to resentment… but his decisions from there are his, he may not have even noticed her looking at him and continue to not to so he doesn’t have to hurt the dynamic between him and his friend, OR he may acknowledge what you say and avoid her OR make a point to make you more comfortable by making you feel included and do things like kiss you infront her or something, OR worse case scenario he can cheat(which seems unlikely especially this soon into reuniting) whatever he does you gave him your trust, what he does with it is his choice… but you can’t revoke it if there’s no reason too, its not fair… if he cheats its his loss, and kinda better to know sooner rather then later if he wants to be that way… I for one don’t express jealousy in a relationship for exactly that reason, you can make me look stupid but in the end you’re the one who lost out on someone faithful, honest, kind etc… put that crown on talk to your man and express your concerns in a light hearted manner and unless he gives you a reason not to trust him then remember who he chose to share his life with, look at your left hand… most people don’t make that decision lightly, especially not men…
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When you see her starring at him, ask her a direct question. About anything. Keep asking questions as soon as you see her look at him for more than a few seconds.
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Hang out with them less.
Some of you women are so backward in speaking up, put her on the spot when she does, you will definitely be able to tell if she lying by how she responds to you 
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Doesn’t matter what she does but what is his reaction? Let her reminisce and whatever… he married you not her
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Doesn’t matter what she does but what is his reaction? Let her reminisce and whatever… he married you not her
Tell her ass what’s up. She’s grown.
Be secure in your marriage. Communicate with your husband how she is making you feel, just to let him know, and together figure out a solution.
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i had this girl once , eye bang my man while we were on vacation…so anytime we went to the pool or anything I dolled myself up…I told my man about her looking, and he literally gave me all the attention…we pretended we never met, and it was fun… sometimes people come into our lives to test … he passed
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Just throw a banana at her head
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Honestly, hug & kiss on him a little more. May HER uncomfortable 
but I’m petty so that’s just me 
my man is MY man tho 
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Give her something to stare at. 
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Trust your gut. Call her out on it
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Ask her if she has an eye problem lol
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When she is staring at him you go up and give him a kiss and stare back at her …
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I mean my husband’s best friend was my ex, and my best friend is my husband’s ex. All from high school and over fifteen years ago. It isn’t weird unless you make it weird. We chose each other just as they each chose their respective spouses. There of course has been instances of jealousy, but at the end of the day my husband is married to me and I to him. Exes are irrelevant.
If the girl makes you uncomfortable, say something. If she stares too much at your husband, say something, call her out. She herself may not even realize she is doing it. I stare, not because I want the person, I just generally find one thing and fixate on it. Half the time I don’t even realize I’m staring at a person until my husband is like snap out of it. 
You won’t know or feel better until you confront the situation.
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Trust your gut! But love up on your man more make her uncomfortable. If she’s got a thing for your man she will soon not want to hang out.
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Grow up she just looking and it was so long ago
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Do you trust your husband? If so then nothing. Watch the hoochie tho. Always trust your instincts…
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Trust your instincts for sure
She might be remembering the good ol days. Lol idk but I wouldn’t be tryna double date w my man’s ex. No thanks jmo
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Don’t be mean to her that’s when guys start to comfort the one that he feels need’s protecting
Just stay secure and keep doing u you got him he married you
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My personal advice is to take a breath and take a step back before you say or do anything.
Here’s some things to think about:
- there’s a certain sense of nostalgia attached to seeing someone you used to be close to whether they were a friend or more. One of my husband’s friends is a guy a I went to high school with. He’s got a wife and a kid. I know I’ve “stared” at him but honestly? Is it because I want him or something like that? Absolutely not. My thoughts are something like…‘Wow it is so good to see him happy and settled. Look at how good he is with his wife and his kid.’ ‘wow highschool was so long ago. Look at how we’ve both changed’ ‘hard to believe we went from hanging at the pool hall being teens to spouses and parents with jobs and homes of our own’ and even ‘i wonder how his mom is doing. She was the sweetest lady’ and ‘it seems like forever ago and no time at all’ it’s definitely not an “I want you” thing or even a “I want to go back” thing. It’s a nostalgia thing.
- Think about she acts with her current boyfriend. What does that relationship look like?
- Other than looking at your husband…has she done anything else at all to make you uncomfortable? If not I would consider that this may be a “you” issue. You know she’s an ex and you may be reading a little too much into her actions and putting motives on her that aren’t actually there.
Keep an eye on things sure. You’re uncomfortable so it’s not unreasonable to pay attention and be a little cautious…but don’t mistreat her or your husband or let your behavior create issues that aren’t necessarily there.
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Sit on your husband’s lap and kiss him.
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Sounds like potential swinging time
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Look she could still be pinning for him as if he’s the one that got away. The important thing is to pay attention not only to her actions but your husbands response to her presence if he reacts like she is just some girl who is dating his best friend then the only one to watch is her. But I would talk to your husband about the weird vibe bc he may notice it too an not want to say anything just so you don’t worry or he could be oblivious to it and you saying hey I’m feeling like there’s a weird vibe with her do you pick up on it too will get him to question some of her behavior and be more cautious around her. Outside of that I’d make it known subtly that you are not going anywhere and you’re definitely in love with your husband. Just show him far more attention than her and she may stop staring or she’ll disappear an your vibe will be correct bc she may just be using the best friend to get closer. Ya never know. I do though bc I’ve been where you are only difference was she took to dating my husbands older brother and she went a little too far an had his kid while attempting to show my husband how much better than me she was. I didn’t go anywhere and I showed him her true intentions and now the only contact they have is family events bc of her kid being his niece and my husband doesn’t talk to her at all but he will engage with his niece bc she is a child who has nothing to do with her mothers ignorance.
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Your CERTAIN she’s staring at him? Cause I disassociate like a mofo at times and just kinda stare into the middle, like the space between me and a person or an object and ppl are forever thinking I’m looking at them and I’m like "no, I’m lost in the nothingness. This has nothing to do with anyone"
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Sounds like you have trust issues with your hubby. It was from high-school. Let it go.
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This has nothing to do with her. Your insecurities are showing.
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You need to address your insecurities
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Honestly, she’s with the best friend, I doubt she would make a move on your husband with her boyfriend there. I would understand if she was trying to get him alone or something in these get togethers but that’s not your complaint. I wouldn’t say anything until
she actually does something that causes concern. Keep your guard up and watch how she is in her own relationship that will give you hints as to her true feelings. Watch your husbands reactions to her as well. Best of luck.
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For everyone saying insecure, no. Its not insecure its bc we know how slimey some girls can be. Id be on guard at all times. Period. Whether it was hs or not that doesnt matter theres history. Regardless if shes had him in the past, i bet even on her best day that girl couldn’t compare to you. Id stare back and id stare HARD and id be all over my husband in front of her 
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Yeah, keep your eye on that. Not good.
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Oh I’d be confronting her, I don’t care if it makes it awkward or not. 
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This sounds like something to work through with your individual therapist. You’re waaaay in your head about this
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Stop staring at her…
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She should talk to her husband about it in private. Maybe he feels the same way? Even if he doesn’t it’s something they need to work through. At a minimum the husband is aware and pays more attention to help put his wife’s uneasiness to rest.
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Next time she’s staring at him look at his face and look at her and say “is there something on his face?”
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The admins need to start deleting these people. They are spamming everywhere
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My first thought…what a crappy friend, to do that to your best friend! Wow
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Even if she does still have feelings for him, can you trust him to tell her to back off if she made an advance on him? If so then I wouldn’t even worry about it.
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Ask her if she has a staring problem next time she’s looking. Lol I would no matter who’s feeling it hurt.
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How do you know who she’s staring at if you’re not staring at her? That’s creeping. Who cares who she looks at. Maybe it weird for her too. Get out of your own head and don’t start drama
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If you trust him you say nothing. If you don’t find a different guy.
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I wouldn’t worry about it, he married you, not her. I love the fact that women stare at & are attracted to my husband, it’s flattering bc he’s mine lol.
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Confront her when she does it
You should leave it alone. She’s probably looking over what she missed out on. If you trust your husband then there is no need to worry. … if you don’t, then you don’t have a relationship in the first place
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You should confide in your husband about what you are feeling and how things are making you feel. You should be his top priority. He should also be yours.
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She wanting that Swang Thang for a little bang bang.
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I wouldn’t worry until you have true reason to worry.
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Sharpen your knife in front of her, while she’s staring.
Maybe she will catch on 
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I would definitely say something that is inappropriate she has a boyfriend and he is married