My husbands teenage daughter stays on facetime with a boy all day...advice?

He has a 13 year old daughter. She’s talking to this boy. She’s on the phone with him all day long. Like they’re video chatting the entire day. But they really aren’t talking to each other. They just have the video chat going while she’s doing homework or he’s playing video games. He will even be talking to other friends all while this video chat is going.My husband is not a fan. He doesn’t mind if they video chat sometimes. But all day and when they aren’t even talking to each other, no. But he isn’t sure how to go about it with her without her shutting down.Any tips would be appreciated!

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I remember being 13 and doing the same thing except I’m in my 40’s and it was a home phone lol

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Thank your lucky stars if that’s all she’s doing.

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This was literally me at 16 but without the video chat. I once went over 24hrs on the same phone call. As long as her homework and chores are getting done, is it really that big of a deal?

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My kids do this as well. They won’t talk besides a few words every now and again. But they will stay on the video chat. I figured they aren’t hurting anyone so I just leave mine. However if you all as parents don’t like it I would sit her down and let her know that there’s no sense in being on the phone if they are not talking and as the comment above set a limit on when she can get on. There is an app that you can download to her and your phone that lets you set limits and gives you the option to even set a bedtime. When that time rolls around the phone will automatically lock and not allow access to apps

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She is 13 set limits or take the phone…

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My kiddos have to earn their electronics everyday ages 6,12,13,15. Homework, chores before they even ask for electronics. They also know, no phones at dinner, or any outing we do as a family. Remember electronics is a privilege not a need.

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My son would do this, and as annoying as it was, I was thankful he wasn’t out experimenting with drugs, hanging with the wrong crowd, or having sex. But once it became “we’re gonna fall asleep on the phone and wake up to each other”, something had to change. Time limit and restrictions!!

Tell her she going to start paying half her phone bill if she stays on video chat all day. :joy:

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if she’s still getting stuff done is it really a problem

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It’s 2023 this is what teens do. Leave her alone. She’s not doing anything wrong.

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She could be doing so much worse.

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Grow up be a parent instead of a friend, cut her off!!! Limit her time!

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My teenage nieces are the same way

I would rather that over her doing much worse things.

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Think a lot of teenagers are doing to this

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Why isn’t her dad putting a time limit on this?

I would rather then video chatting then having sex… pick your battles

I don’t understand the problem here
She’s not out fooling around with him, she’s literally at home under your supervision

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Leave the girl alone. She’s a teenager doing teenager things. If it’s not negatively impacting something important like her school work or whatever then who cares?

I used to sit on the phone day and night at that age and that was the home phone. My parents had to yell at me to get off for 5 mins so they could make a phone call :rofl:

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Just because this is what a lot of teens do, doesn’t mean you have to allow it. If neither of you are ok with it, sit her down and set some rules/boundaries. Remember you’re the parents.

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What exactly is the issue? I’m sure she’s not running up a huge bill as most ppl seem to be unlimited these days, you said she’s doing her homework so it’s not as if schoolwork is suffering.

It’s not an age thing; I once watched an entire Wimbledon final on FaceTime with my best friend who was also watching it.

The fact you call her your husbands daughter means you should probably just kind your own business and let her parents handle it. She’s just hanging out like teenagers these days do. I used to spend all day on FaceTime with friends too. It’s not the end of the world.

They’re enjoying each other’s company. I’d set some rules like

  • chat is off at meal times.
  • chat is off when you’re in the bathroom.
  • chat is off while doing your chores.
  • chores are done before you chat.
    Other than that, let her be.
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Interesting reading these comments from one extreme to the next.
While it may be what all teens are doing, doesn’t mean your husband’s daughter (the definition bugs me as to how you referred to her as) has to also do it. Parents need to realize that they still need to parent their teens. Boundaries, limits need to be set.

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id say leave them alone. they arent hurting anybody.
shes still doing her homework.
he’s still doing his thing.
who are they hurting? what would they be doing otherwise? whats the harm realy?

My 8 & 9 year olds do this with their siblings that don’t live with us & friends sometimes. Most of the time they are playing a video game together. I too think it’s unnecessary to sit with someone just watching you sometimes. If it’s a problem interfering with her life then limit phone time if not :woman_shrugging:t4:

My 16 year old sister does it. It’s just a comfort thing to her because they can’t live together she has him on FaceTime all day unless we go somewhere. We ask if so and so is on the phone before we say something too personal which her boyfriend is practically family now. But it all depends on how you want to handle it.

Let your husband handle it. If he doesn’t care then you gotta let it go.

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went through the same thing. its weird. but its what the kids do these days. set boundaries when they cant like meals etc

My daughter is the same age and stays on a video chat with the same person all day