My mom is upset that I do not want her in the room with me when I give birth

Stand your ground. You can also tell the hospital you don’t want her there.

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Do not give in. Do not let her ruin your labor and delivery. If your plan is to not have her in the room, then DONT. She can get mad if she wants, but this is YOUR big moment. You and your hubby. That’s it!!

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Stick to your guns!!! This is your child your experience

Just being a big brat. When my daughter had both of her sons. I was in the room both times. But with the last one there was only 1 aloud in the room. Then like 2 days before she was to be induced they changed it. But I was okay with not being in the room. But she wanted both of us in there. I said I wouldn’t go in with there was only 1 aloud. And her boyfriend told me he would sooner me be in there with her. So it was a bit iffy but it all worked out.

This behavior is exactly why you don’t want her in the delivery room or near the baby. Period. End of discussion.


Stand your ground it’s not about her it’s all about you!

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It’s your day not hers, you want your husband in there not her, she doesn’t have any say and if she wants to be nasty to you, ignore and block her. You and your family don’t need that in your life, labor is stressful enough you don’t need her insanity on top of it all.

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She’s being a brat. You married and your husband comes first. Hold your ground. Ignore the subject, if she brings it up ignore her or change the subject. When she sees that she can’t manipulate you she’ll back off. Don’t call her when you go into labor until you’re at the hospital. Tell the nurses the situation and they will deal with her believe me they will.

You are not wrong. I was in the room when my daughter had her first child along with the baby’s dad. When she had her second baby she asked me … if I would mind not being in the room this time that she just wanted her and her babies dad. She also asked me if it would hurt my feelings and I told her of course not . I respected her wishes and that is what this mom should also do. Stick to your decision and your mom will just have to get over it…

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I would flat out cut contact with her until she can respect you and your wishes. :ok_hand:t2: and let her know that


No you are not wrong I would tell her why I don’t want her in there also. I hope she doesn’t treat you like that in front of your kids. I’m sorry

The father of the child should be there before the grandmother. She’s being a brat.

You aren’t wrong. You can have whoever you want in the room with you. She needs to grow up and get over it. Plus why does she think treating you poorly would make you want her there even more. If she were any of person treating you like this how would you handle it?

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Tell the Drs and nurses when you get there NOT to allow her in. I also would not allow her around the baby if she wants to act that way. Cut her off completely til she can behave as a reasonable adult and respect your decisions. If she cannot, then cut her off for good.


Cut her out for now until you have the baby. Block her and let her see you are not kidding and she is not getting in there then after the baby is born and you have time to settle in then unblock her and tell her the reason why. And if she still is being mean and rude then block her again. Just cause she is your mom doesn’t mean you need to put up with it. If it was anyone else that said that wouldn’t you block her

That’s toxic. Mother or not. This is your life and this is a HUGE moment that is supposed to be happy and memorable in a great way for you. Do what you want to do. She is very much in the wrong.

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If that were my mom she’d be lucky if she was allowed at the hospital at all

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Tell her no, don’t give in. She has no right to be there and this isn’t about her feelings, it’s about you, your comfort, your support system, and your baby getting here healthy and happy. You don’t need her causing stress for you in the room. Some people like having other family present but that’s totally up to the person delivering the baby. Nobody has the right to be at a birth if they weren’t there at the conception.


It Is Your. Right To Tell Her That. After All It Is Your Baby.

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You need to be comfortable with who’s in the room. It’s YOUR choice. I would fully understand if either of my girls didn’t want me in the delivery room, and would respect their wishes. By her pushing the issue, shows that she does respect you.


Tell her no and if she doesn’t listen tell the doctor if she comes in to kick her out. My doctor did that for me because she wouldn’t listen to me saying no


Ummm, it’s 100% your call who you want or don’t want in the room with you. She needs to pull her shit together… its not even about her. :woman_facepalming:

Listen you don’t need people on Facebook to justify to you about what you’re feeling I understand that’s probably what you need because of most likely how you were raised but you are allowed to feel how you want and honestly the more times you stand up to her you’re going to see her do this but eventually hopefully she’ll catch on


I’m glad my mother never asked to be in the delivery room with my husband and I. That was a beautiful moment that was shared between my husband and I and the birth of our children.

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The last thing you want or need is someone mum or not that you don’t have a good relationship with in the room when you give birth will make you stressed and anxious


no, you are not wrong, Tell her they only allow one other person in the room during labor & that is your husband, Don’t listen to her

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It is your choice, either way,

Tell her “only people who were there when we made the baby will be allowed in the room.”


I’m sure this is very upsetting for you, and you don’t need the stress at this time or any other time. If at all possible stay away from your mother or have any contact with her. If she’s this inconsiderate of your feelings, now…What do you think she’ll be like later? This is your’s and your husband’s special day, you have control of your life and your future child…Not your mother’s right.

No you’re not wrong, cut her off from your family for awhile if you need to, sounds like a toxic person

Nope stick to your guns


Omggg that’s terrible —- my mom is not like this so I am sorry that you are going thru this! My mom was in with our first but won’t be this time— can u blame on covid?I mean my hospital is really strict but also we live over an hour away now from our families.

Not wrong at all. With all 3 of my kids only person in there was thier fathers!!!

BAN HER FROM THE HOSPITAL!!! You don’t need the stress…stay away from her for a while, relax, your baby, your life, but since we don’t have the whole story…like is she supporting you financially, do you live with her or does she live with you, some things to consider. Be firm, don’t cry, tell her to back off your husband should too…

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Stop answering her calls. You are allowed to have whoever you want in that room. Just because she is your mom doesn’t mean you have to keep having that toxic relationship.

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This makes me feel special because my daughter’s wanted me in the room I didn’t have to ask they knew I would be there if they wanted me or I would have waited outside if they wanted me it’s their baby their life experiences I’m life experiences I’m just glad they Chose me


Your mom is wrong, giving birth is a private moment between you and your husband, not other family members. Mom should stay out of the birthing room and see grandchild after the birth like a normal grandmother would do.

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DO NOT GIVE IN! it’s your birth and you have every right to not want her in the room and that’s okay

Tell her there’s covid restrictions and they’re only allowing the dad to be on the room with you

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It’s DEFINITELY your choice. You and hubs can decide who and who not to have in there. Fuck anyone’s feelings.

She is being more than a brat :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes: your the one that’s in labor so it’s whatever you want and everyone should respect that

Tell her this is your experience and you wish to keep this journey between you and your husband. Stick to your guns- and if all else fails, the nurses will kick her out without making it seem like your decision :two_hearts:

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She needs to respect your wishes. Would I have loved to be in the room for the births of all of my grandchildren? Absolutely! But if the mom wanted the dad or anyone else, I don’t want to add stress to her by pushing my way in. I’m happy to be out in the family waiting room, ready to live on that baby once they are ready for visitors.

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Lie to her. Tell her your limited to one person: your husband.

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No you aren’t wrong. I only had my child’s father in the room both births & it will be the same this time. My moms not offended, as she shouldn’t be. She is the other person I let visit but she stays in her lane.

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She’s being a brat! This is your time you do you. I’m speaking as a mother who’s daughter also didn’t want me in the delivery room and guess what that’s fine.

It’s your body and your child and don’t feel guilty or bad for choosing what’s right for you! That being said I feel so sad for you that you don’t have a loving relationship with your mother that you deserve…i would be lost without my mother and she was welcomed whole heartedly in the delivery room all 3 times I delivered my children, she even cut my oldests umbilical cord, I could not have gone through labor and birth without her she was such a great support

Communication is key… why is it so important to your mom that she be there… your mom needs to understand you leave mom and dad to become one with your husband or wife… she needs to put herself in your husband shoes and understand how he wants to be there for the birth of his child …if she causing you stress and heartbreak you don’t need this now …if it’s your final decision for your husband to be there stand on it and let it be the end of discussion…gotta love her

As a grandma I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND her wanting to be in the room with her little girl having a baby, BUT the Daddy comes first and yes your mom is being a brat, I am sorry she is causing you to have hurt feelings that is not good for the baby, so grams needs to step back, its so hard but she has too!!

Bless you and your family sweetheart it will be ok

She’s being selfish…

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Put ur foot down now before the baby is born, if she’s trying to undermine ur wishes now I can only imagine the stuff she’ll pull when the baby is actually here… Tell her it’s ur baby and ur rules, if she doesn’t like it then tough

Well of course it is your husband that should be your mom should understand that if she wasn’t so pushy I would say yes let her in but make sure she doesn’t get put above your husband he is the first one to go in

Say NO and with your chest !

you are not in the wrong it is your husbands right n privilege to be in with you when yalls child is born keep your head up n keep smiling dont let her get to you

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Your mother is out of control. She knows what it’s like to be pregnant and how emotional and stressful that is, but she’s focused solely on her. Don’t engage with her. When she brings it up, tell her, “Only my husband will be in the room with me, period. This discussion is over. If you keep bringing this up, I will leave / ask you to leave / or hang up the phone.” You need to establish firm boundaries with her; she lacks them.

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No, you aren’t wrong. Stick to your guns. She’s going to make you feel bad no matter what you do

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Not at all! It’s your time and you can have who you want. In 2013 when I had my 1st baby I had my mom and my ex(1st sons dad). In 2019 I had just my fiance(2nd sons dad). This time I plan on just having my fiance(2nd sons dad also)

Tell her that her behavior is what is making her not be able to be in the room. Birth is for mom and dad (sometimes dad’s aren’t in the room too). If anyone upsets your peace of mind then they can wait in the waiting room or wait for you to be settled in at home. This is your decision

Stand your ground its your lador and delivery. You should have who ever you want as your support person. Stay strong with what your wants and needs.

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She’s being more then a brat… you have EVERY right to tell her no. Stand your ground and don’t let anyone cross your boundaries. If you can’t deal with her anymore have your husband deal with her, there is no need for her added stress and temper tantrums on you and your baby. When you go to the hospital let EVERYONE know all the medical staff every family member and friend know that she is not to come in until you say it’s fine. Someone if not multiple people will be your guard and you will be able to have this moment without stress and sharing it with your husband.

She will not like this at all but that’s to bad for her and not your problem. A lot of people have a hard time respecting others boundaries and that’s not okay.

It’s your decision final

Nope, and make sure the staff at the hospital know not to let her in

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When I gave birth to my daughter, I told my mom it wouldn’t be fair for her to be in the room and not my daughter’s paternal grandma. So it was just me and my daughter’s father. My mom is the same way, I feel for you!

Your birth experience is all about you. No one else. If you don’t want her there then don’t tell her until the baby is born. Express to your medical team what you want and who’s allowed and they will support whatever you decide

Tell her it’s COVID regulations

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Nothing wrong with choosing your husband. your mom needs to take a chill pill. Tbh if It was me I’d cut her out completely because that’s toxic af!

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Cut all ties with her. She’s a narcissist. You have every right to have in your room who you want in there. She’s being rude and inconsiderate. She’s making it all about her. This is yours and your husbands time. She’s toxic cut her off.

Hell no you are not wrong, and if she cared she would understand and wouldn’t be putting you through this while you’re pregnant.

Definitely not wrong

I didn’t want ( and didn’t have) anyone except the medical team when i gave birth twice

You’re definitely not wrong she is being more than a brat! She may be acting like this now but after it’s over she’ll get over it. You have every right to have your husband in the room. The fact that she thinks she should be in the room instead of your husband is completely selfish!

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No you are not wrong if that’s what you want just your hubby your mum should respect your wishes and certainly not make you feel bad .keep saying no do let your mum make you change your mind .it’s not her baby .good luck hope you have a lovely birth with just you and hubby.

It’s your choice . She should respect it . I wouldn’t even call her when I go into labor if she’s going to like that . It’s not about her .

Stand your ground. It’s your birth experience. And imagine how awful she’s gonna behave during the labor and birth… She can wait for a text like all the other relatives lol.

When my daughter had her 1st, she was 18 and scared. So I was there. But with her second it was her husband with her. And she did just fine

Call her on her behavior. This is your choice, not hers. She needs to test you as an adult and equal

Just dont tell her you’re headed to the hospital. Call her once your bundle of joy arrives. Your body, your baby, your choice.

You are the one giving birth, NOT her! Its your choice who’s in that room. If you don’t get along you definitely don’t need that toxic attitude while in labor.

Hold your ground! Don’t let her blemish your delivery. I had a similar problem & the hospital did great backing me. They even took some blame to the “rule”. Best of luck

Your husband needs to be in the room with you

No you are not wrong. Who wants more than the husband to be there when you push a baby out of your body!

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Your husband belongs in there

Choose your husband over everyone except your children. Hug’s

No you’re are not wrong with my first I had my mom sister husband and mother in law and with my second I didn’t want anyone but my husband and everyone understood

Not wrong and well you need to cut her out if she is that damn toxic

Your husband deserves to be in there. He helped create that baby, not your mom. Even if they would let two people be in there, she wouldn’t be one of them. She’s a control freak.

Lol I love my mother but if she was making me feel this way, she would NOT be in the room with me. You don’t need the extra stress on you or your baby. So that would be a no from me ma’am.

No, no it’s not wrong if you to want to share this experience with your husband. Our hospital only let one person in when our daughter was born, no visitors and it was beautiful.

Your choice, just remember this when your daughter is giving birth, no matter how much it might hurt, it is her choice who she has in the room. If that bothers you, maybe reconsider, if not, then you are making the right choice for your values, stand your ground. I did not invite my mom in for either of my births and would not be hurt if my daughter chooses to leave me out of that experience as well.

No it’s not wrong. My mother and sisters where in the room with my first born and for the other 2 births of my babies it was only me and my husband and it was wonderful it was a bond like no other

And with my first I had people that I weren’t close to and didn’t want there to begin with show up they were high and drunk and I had the hospital security remove them off hospital grounds

she can either do as you’ve directed or youre done talking to her till after you deliver… last thing you need is something happening to you & baby from stress…

Hold your ground. Set boundaries that work for you and the family you and your husband are creating. As a strong, grown up woman, you are capable of deciding what you want. Mama will eventually get used to the reality that she’s not the boss of you. Congratulations on the new baby


You are not wrong. I am sorry she is treating you like that. She is very self centered.

I’ve never understood parents feeling like they have to have a grip on their adult children still. I’m preparing my kids to grow and spread their wings without me. And that means I won’t be a part of some things, and that is ok. My oldest is 22 and I burst with pride for all the things she is accomplishing without me.

That said, no you are not wrong. Have your day how you want it with the birth of your child. Your mom is being a brat for sure.


I had to do this with my second child and while it caused tension leading up to it I’m thankful my mom wasn’t there and I got to do and be as I felt in that moment and the days after until I let her come over. We don’t get these birth moments back and we need to ensure we feel most comfortable, supported and safe regardless of anyone else’s opinions (even our partners) . I know it’s hard, it wasn’t easy making that call but as my dad says “only you know when you’ve had enough” and her making u feel like shit because she feels she can on your big moment, is further illustration why she shouldn’t be there. You can send pictures and he’ll even FaceTime but don’t fold. Stay strong mama and have your moment on YOUR terms because the baby is gonna come on it’s terms but u have every right to decide who will support YOU!!!

First off you’re not a horrible person. The birth of your baby should most definitely be shared with your husband. I would talk with your OB doc on your next visit that it’s going to be your husband in the room with you and explain you’re having problems with your mom wanting to bully you in changing your mind. This way your doctor, labor and delivery crew know your wishes ahead of time. Stand your ground and if your mom is still trying to make you feel bad don’t talk to her. Forward her calls to VM and do the same on texts messages. Please keep your husband updated so he can do the same thing. This is a special time for you and your husband. Sending positive vibes of love, light and peace​:rainbow::purple_heart:

The people who need boundaries set the most are the ones who don’t want you to set them. It’s good you spoke up for yourself and your husband. If that’s what you two decided you wanted, stick to that.

No offense, but she sounds like kind of a ¢unt… You’re not wrong hun… it’s about what YOU want! Don’t let anyone bully you into something you’re not comfortable with. :heart: