My mother in law constantly tells me my child is bad because of me: Advice?

All kids react differently and they allowed to have breakdowns and tantrums it’s their way if expressing themselves
I’m a gran- mother and mother in law and believe me it’s not easy with kids.Mums do their best so know in your heart you you only want and do your best as a mum.Kids will grow up soon and they will be moulded as you want them.Just put it in one ear and out the other.At the end of the day she’s the gran and there to stay.You just be there for your beautiful kids and nurture and love and let them be kids. :kissing_heart:

Your MIL raised her kid. She needs to back off and let you raise yours. And if she doesn’t like it, she can stay home. As long as your child isn’t hurt you, herself or anyone else, she/he is good.

That is a normal child. Tell her piss off twat

First off it is not your mother in laws place to tell you you are a bad mother and why is she not telling her son he is a bad father.you have to stand up for yourself. That said yes I agree her place her rules

Tell your mother in law to shove it

I would like to hear the ML’s side before I say anything. There are always 2 sides to everything.

Flip her off n tell her to shut it.

Well. I would tell her if my child is so bad maybe she should stay away and we all can be happy

U half to teach your kids to behave when they go to someones house no matter whos house it is. My grandkids never did this at my house. They were good. I hope she dont run around in restaurants. U are the parent its your responsibility to teach them respect. Its not childs fault its yours complety

I think that it’s a big problem now with kids even at 4 they should b taught respect and discipline when u teach them at an early age they grow up to b better people

Thay go through stages, and you must teach them respect by prasing the good they do and discipling the bad they do.

My MIL was the same and it got to the point I couldn’t even be nice to her anymore, one day I needed her to babysit my daughter was about two and my MIL and her other sons were letting my daughter do whatever she wanted, “even write on her walls”…(not joking) when I got to her house an seen everytging, I finally blew up and told my daughter what does she think she’s doing, of course MIL tried to step in and I immediately told her, I’m trying to raise my kids RIGHT, as you can see I’m stuck with one of yours that I have to continue to raise because YOU forgot something’s to show him… Neve again has she tried to criticize me and she’s actually even careful around me… I like it this way better.

i have to say that’s not anyone’s place to call your child bad because u are the parent and u do what u please . i love my children and if i want to spoil them i will period.

I would tell that woman to get her a life

That does not make you a bad mother at all

Mines is the same way :unamused:

Kids will be kids n sounds like your mother in law needs a punch in the throat or a kick in the c**t :slight_smile:

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You’re kiddo is just being a kiddo. My kids are the same way.

I’m guessing her children were all good as gold and never put a foot wrong?

Tell her you always thought the child took after her dad! !!!

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No you’re not s bad mother it’s natural curiousity and how they learn xxdint let anyone tell you that nobody has that right x

No it doesnt make you a bad mother this is what kids do they have to test their boundaries…your raising them not your mil…tell her to butt out…its not her kid

Tell her you’ve lived with her work and she ain’t do all that great💁 warn your husband so he doesn’t get insulted but nah fuck that

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Tell her you live with one of hers and your not impressed with her work either

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My son is the same way don’t make you a bad mom

Your kid is almost 4 and acting like it.
Your MIL is literally attempting to poison her against you.
I would speak with your hubby and MIL, separately and then together, and see what each of them say. Tell them your concerns. After discussing it with your hubby, tell your MIL that she won’t be able to visit with your daughter if her behaviour doesn’t stop. The only person she truly is hurting is your child, which isn’t fair to your daughter.

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Tell her exactly that. Kids will be kids. Kids will have melt downs. Kids will not listen. Doesn’t mean all the time. And doesn’t mean they’re bad. Tell her to back off or get a reality check.

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Honestly I think your husband should tell her to knock it off. If she doesn’t I would reduce contact. F her. She’s not helpful at all.

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Ur girl is just acting as a 4 years old child !!
U know better and no one should judge ur parenting anyway
So the next time tell her ya she’s the best :heart:

Just dont pay attention

Get your husband, father of said child to tell his mother to mind her own business. If that doesn’t work then politely tell her that if her mother didn’t raise her to say something nice, or not anything at all, then maybe you aren’t the problem.

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Don’t go around her.

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Nope this make her a normal child !

No honey… Your kid is probably ferral. Highly curious and intelligent. Those kiddos are hard for anyone to handle. Tell ya MIL to suck a duck! Dont tell hubby to handle it unless you know hell be super supportive.

I hope not because my son acts just like you described😝

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You should be raising your kid in such a way that they already know what is acceptable in someone else’s house. Children should not be running in the house or jumping on furniture. Neither should they feel like it’s okay to touch things that are not theirs. When indoors, we use our inside voice.
You don’t sound like a bad mom but it does sound like you still need to take the time to teach your child boundaries. You got this! :+1:

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It doesn’t . Sounds like you need to put her in her place.

that’s what KIDS DO. it sounds like she might need to be reminded and also if she thinks you are such a “bad mom” ask her to stop and reflect of her job as a mother. i bet she didn’t do that great to begin w. it makes her a shitty person to sit back and judge someone’s parenting and tell someone their kid is bad.

Tell her “I don’t need parenting advice from you, I live with one of yours and he could use improvement” :wink: you’re not a bad mom, she needs to mind her own business.

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also don’t go around her, if she thinks that then fuck her id tell her watch how much u see us n o w

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She’s just being a kid! Had MIL said same to me. I would just smile, no comment and ignore her! She’s baiting you and don’t let her get the best of you. You are the Mom she’s NOT! Our children did not see her very often.

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Nope your a great mum ignore her :grin:

Graciously let her know that you have decided that in order to not offend her, you will no longer have the children over to visit.

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No .your the mother not her .n her opinion doesnt matter .ur doing great .she acts like children should b quiet n sit still 24/7 .n no they shouldnt .they are little ppl who r allowed to play n develope their own personalities .keep up the good work

Tell her that you are married to her kid and he STILL needs work (even if he doesn’t) so she is the last person to give advice on the subject

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My mil and me don’t see eye to eye. My daughter is a strong will child and I’m okay with that. She’s independent and awesome human being and she is my life. Children are different now than 20 years ago

Tell your MIL maybe your kid can be a little shit because of the way she raised her son :woman_shrugging:t4::joy: that will shut the bitch up. If not, tell her to fuck off and not bother visiting if it bugs her that much!!

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Repeat after me “at least 50% of what makes a person a person is genetics, the other 50% is the socialization which includes peers which eventually make up the most influence as a kid gets older as well as parents and extended family namely you MIL. Must be the influence of the genes from your side of the family.”…but then again I am savage so there’s that…start being too busy for MIL

That’s completely normal behavior for a four year old

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She’s your husbands mother, so I wouldn’t advise being disrespectful. If your child is almost four, she will soon be entering school. Now is a good time to teach her there are different rules in other places. She won’t be allowed to be “spirited “ in school by running around, shouting and climbing on things. Just my opinion.

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If your oldest isn’t even 4 yet, it sounds like your MIL should do some reading on child development, loosen up, and quit judging. What kind of Grandmother is she?

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Sounds like your child is just being a normal kid :grin: if your MIL starts up while you and your children are there just get up, gather up the kids and say “obviously you don’t want us here so we’ll fucking leave”!

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Your mother in law is toxic and is picking on you and your 4yr old.
Most 4yr Olds are curious and full of energy, that doesn’t make them bad it means they are learning the world around them.
Personally I’d cut her out I’d be worried about my child hearing her say they’re bad and I’d be telling my partner if he can’t stand up for me and our child he can fuck off with her

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Mol think they know it all tell her to look at her. Kids and huband

I want to be kind. It’s hard. I would say GTFOH with that.

Your need to tell her to mind her own business they are your kids not hers

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My mother in law is the same way with me but no if u think u are a good mother and u do everything for ur child then u are ignore her and if she keeps it up don’t let her see ur kids anymore

Well, it’s her fault she’s the mother in law so tell her to shut it.

Ahh she may just be from the children should be seen and not heard generation. My fil always thought my kids were wild and every other person said what well behaved, smart, well read children. :woman_shrugging:t3:

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No that sounds like any normal kid your doing great my mil and I don’t get along either

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You are the parent, not her. Dont let people shame you. Everyone always judges and nothing anyone does it right… If it continues there is nothing wrong with getting rid of toxic things in your life and relationship :scissors::scissors: sometimes you have to cut ties…

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No it doesn’t make u a bad mother.

We’re all bad moms in someone else’s eyes.
Let it roll. You’re a great mom and your 4yo is lucky to have you as a mother.

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ANYONE who puts you down to your child or in front of your child should be warned to stop and if continues should be cut off. If they have an issue with you then they should take it up with you not belittle you to your child(ren). Family or not, negativity is negativity and toxic is toxic no matter what skin it wears.
…Besides that, it sounds like you need to start teaching your child boundaries and how to behave appropriately in others homes and social situations.

Absolutely not. Tell her to shove her opinion up where the sun don’t shine :joy::roll_eyes:

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Trek her if she can’t handle em don’t come around.

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Just limit how much you let your in laws into your life.

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I would tell her the problem is she did not raise her son correctly best reason your daughter is being a normal four year old just throw the shoe back at her is what I’m saying

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If she doesnt have anything supportive, useful or encouraging to say, she can mind her own motherhood. My response to anyone when i get comments.

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Tell her you live with one of her kids so she has no room to talk about parenting mistakes :joy::joy::joy::joy:

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Tell your MIL to mind her business
Your child Your rules
No-one has the answers we all just do our best :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts:

Tell her it’s not the child that’s naughty it’s her attitude that sucks your child sounds like a normal 4 year old at that age they are exploring there world and learning new things it’s not naughty it’s inquisitive

I wouldn’t take her to visit them. You do need that negativity in either your or your child’s life x

That makes HER a bad mother, actually… Because when a mom shames another mom, that speaks volumes about her own character :wink:

That’s not called being ‘naughty’ your child is being a child. These things are developmental and necessary in a child’s growth! Tell your MIL to shove it and that your child is doing exactly what they should be for their age. You got this mama :heart:

No. It does not. My son is exactly the same and I get told I’m a bad mom all the time. You are doing the best you can with what you have. Every kid misbehaves. It’s life. Nothing wrong with it.

people with perfect kids are either in denial or the kid is to stupid to be busy. just have a headache or upset stomach or whatever at the last minute and let the kids father take them to her house lol should be interesting. also remember never piss off the mother of your grandkids.

She’s 4! Absolutely normal for a 4 year old. If she’s still doing things like that when she’s 10 then maybe you’ll have to crack down on her. If MIL thinks you’re doing a bad job she should stay away from your kid. You don’t need that negativity.

Please don’t take this the wrong way but, if youre “so bad”…her son picked you to have a family with, so what does that say about HER parenting skills?? Lol

She couldn’t be AROUND My children with all that petty drama

No love. It just makes you a mother.
Everyone’s going to have an opinion of how you should be raising your child. And none of them know her like you do. You’re doing a great job mama. Just keep letting her be 4, this is how they learn right from wrong. Your daughter will be ok in spite of what everyone thinks they know. You got this
Just keep in mind. Opinions are like @ssholes. Everyone’s got one, most of them stink, and the only one that matters is your own. :heart:

Not at all! And tell your Mother in law to stay out of it or she can’t see them!