Your child in you make the rules! You had that baby in you for 9 months, you went through pain to deliver, you are the mother, your husband was a sperm donor. Thats it. You make the rules. You do what you want, its your child. You make the decisions. Protect your baby. Its a mothers intinct.
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Have you allowed others around your son? If your mother can come, I understand her frustration.
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Ignore her. Your child your choice. Your husband can deal with her, he should support you and set her straight. She’s just being selfish.
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She can call the cops if youre being unfair, they can settle the matter 
Im sorry but your mil needs to wake the hell up. Im a retired nurse and you can bet your butt that if i was still working during this pandemic, there is no way in hell would i be in the same house as my daughter that lives with me and she is 22yrs old, i would not go anywhere near my young niece and nephew who i am very close to either. It is not worth the risk to their health. Your mil, as an essential worker, should have the brains to understand that and understand your reasoning and shouldnt even be making this an issue. But then again, after what you said about her during the birth of your son, she sounds very selfish and overbearing anyway. You and your husband need to set some very clear boundaries with her in general regarding your son, not just with covid and your husband needs to grow a backbone and stand up to his mother and back you 100% in your decisions surrounding your son, both with covid and moving forward afterwards
You do what you feel is right for your child. Shes ignorant to not want to agree and do the same. Shes being selfish. Tell her to drive by wave out the window. Facetime it’s all possible. Shes not thinking logically clearly
Totally understandable if your going to quarantine your babies circle all together. No contact with anyone who ever goes anywhere
Protect your child. Her feelings are not more important than your child’s safety.
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My son turned one during covid (End of May) and I decided not to have a birthday party for him and I didn’t let anyone over to see him. I upset a few family members… BUT! those are MY kids (I also have a 2&1/2 year old), they are MY responsibility and I decided what I thought was best/safest for MY kids because that is MY JOB as their mother. So, if that causes anyone (family even) to be mad at me then so be it 
I do want to clarify I of course made these decisions with my husband, who thinks caronavirus is sort of silly but he still stood with me on that decision
I have 3 children, I didn’t allow hospital visitors except their siblings very briefly because it was a bonding time for me. If people get mad oh well. You are the mother, and even more so now with covid 19, it has not magically disappeared so being preventive is not a bad thing, as a grandmother and essential worker she should understand and respect that. If she doesn’t don’t stress it, you are mom.
Anyone saying her child her rules is wrong, her husband has a say too. The mom isn’t automatically 100 percent the decision maker. She needs a talk with her hubby…no doubt it might lead to an argument. Do your best, relationships and coparenting is tough. If he is adamant and so are you, maybe reevaluate your relationship or get legal help involved. 💁
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I was the same way with my mil when my daughter was born i didn’t really want her around.My so brought her to the hospital after i asked him not to. But after my son was born all i could think about was how i would feel if my sons wife kept my grandbabies from me in the future and it broke my heart to think about. Now i invite her over for dinner atleast twice a week i always send her pictures and she sees the kids everyday almost. She now respects my boundaries a little better. I understand not having people around because of covid but put yourself in her shoes and think about how you would feel if this happen to you. Send her pictures and facetime with her try including her in your childs life kids only have their grandparents for a short time.
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It’s 2020… There is plenty of video chat apps. The baby is 7 months and it’s not like he is going to do a whole bunch during the visit. Upset my overbearing MIL or keep my 7month old child from possible exposure to a pandemic 🤷 Doesn’t really seem like much of a choice.
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Working in the hospital myself, I would not even think about being around an infant let alone a baby that’s 7 months. Especially with this pandemic and another wave to come. People need to stop being selfish (grandma) and think about the baby’s health which isn’t as immune to things as she is.
If your mother and other adults can visit your baby, shouldn’t your mil be allowed also? Otherwise, there are other ways you can allow her to see her grandchild. Facetime is an example. I’m pretty sure you and her can figure out a way to work things out unless you are unwilling. It’s part of adulting.
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As a mom of two sons I cant imagine being excluded from My grandchild’s life. I understand u need to protect your child. There needs to be understanding on both sides! I hope you can find a compromise good luck!
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Do you want people to say what you wanna hear or do you want people to say the truth, you know that you are keeping that seven-month-old away from her purposely, there seems to be bad blood between you two and it has been allowed to grow, your husband has been playing both sides to keep peace and now both of you have been pitted against each other instead, if you want someone to be mad at, it would Be your own husband, a man who cannot put his foot down to protect his wife and family is a man that deserves absolutely no respect whatsoever, his duty when he married you was pretty clear, you and your child are number one and if he can’t understand that then perhaps it’s time to have a very serious discussion, we all understand protecting our children especially during this time but you’re not truly doing it because you’re protecting your child, you even said that there were issues long before all of this…
Your child’s health is more important then her feelings. If she truly loves her grandchild, she would under that
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You do what you need to for your child. Your baby comes before hurt feelings. Doesn’t matter who
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My question is why wouldn’t you want your child’s grandparents seeing your newborn baby. Grandparents get so excited and anticipate seeing there new grandchild. My mom was there while the birth of my first and I plan to have both my mom and his mom there for the birth of my second. Nothing brings a family closer together than getting to visit in the hospital room with a new baby. All my friends, and family came to the hospital and it was so wonderful, all I wanted to do was show my new baby off!
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Hi. Definitely not the bad guy. My MIL has always watched my little while my husband & I work. We are both work in health care. I know it’s not the same situation, but we face time few days a week so she still feels involved. Sounds like your little is pretty young, but we send pictures. Trying to keep her involved… Hope this helps! Hope it works out…
Don’t ever feel sorry for protecting your baby. You have no reason to ever apologize or feel bad. Trust me I totally understand. I have a 3 month old and 7 year old. I don’t let anyone around the kids. We missed holidays and birthday parties. Sorry but I’m keeping my kids at home!
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They’re your kids so fuck what she thinks.
Fuck what everyone tells u.That is YOUR son not hers❤
Your being petty af. Story first started off with Covid (ok I get that and I would do the same by keeping my son safe) but then you ended it with the real reason you don’t her see your child and that was because she came to the hospital. I could hate my MIL but I would never keep my child from her. Grow up. Do what’s best for your child (after covid) obviously.
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My kids haven’t been around people since March 10. Covid19 us serious. Fuck everyone take care of your baby!
You are keeping your child from her because you do not want the possibility of him being exposed. That’s being a good Mom.
I do believe you are getting some joy from the decision because your wishes, which have nothing to do with the current situation and wasn’t necessary to share, were ignored.
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Eh be the bad guy. If you don’t feel safe its your choice. Its your child, not hers
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Birth is an intimate moment! If you didn’t want here there during it , that is 100% understandable. Legs in the air, pushing a baby out of your cooter. Totally get. But visitation after - pretty standard before all this hoopla.
Now as for the covid- she needs not to be selfish and self consumed. She is one of the front line workers out there helping us folks, and she needs to realize that she is an amazing blessing for doing so but also she may put others at risk. It’s not a personal vendetta. It’s just what is recommended !
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I’d tell her to grow up and act like the adult that she should be. That baby is yours and your husbands not hers and she needs to respect any decision that you make
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So your family probably came to the hospital but his couldnt lol i get the need to be careful but funny is im an essential worker and my children and myself are fine and weve ventured out honestly sounds like you donot like your mil be thankful she wants to be a part of your childs life you could have deadbeat grandparents like my kids experience .
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She needs to get over herself. Your husband needs to put his foot down and tell her right now isn’t the best time. There’s newborns who haven’t met new family (they won’t remember) because of the virus. You do what you think is right and don’t let anyone take that from you.
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I understand the covid part. Single moms are facing new custody battles as essential workers potentially being exposed, one nurse in particular shared her story her kids were taken and given to the father under a temp order over it.
So the seriousness over covid is palpable in our community.
No advise outside of be respectful as possible and as stated somewhere else talk to your husband have him express both of your concerns with this. 
Sounds like your husband is the bad guy for disregarding your wishes from the start and setting the precedent that your rules don’t matter.
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Sometimes you have to be the bad person in order to keep your kids safe 
sorry I’ve had to do it several times from my ex’s family… just explain to her your reasons and be straight forward, don’t expect your husband to do it just talk to him about it and tell him what you want to say to her so he knows like your an adult and if she doesn’t like what you say that’s her problem. Your not put on this earth to make everyone happy the only people you have to worry about are the people who live in your household and everyone else can wait…
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Was she the only person that wasn’t allowed at the hospital, if so I would be upset too. However with the pandemic she should be understand with you not allowing anyone to come over. Maybe you could try FaceTime or Skype so she can still see your child.
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Your child, your rules!
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Same shit happened to me with my father in law. Didn’t want him there he showed up anyways. I love with him and he swears I keep the baby from him.
It wouldn’t fly with me either
Do what your doing. I didn’t allow anyone to know when I had my kids and I called the few people I wanted to come visit personally. And that was with it NOT being a crazy scary pandemic! She can throw a fit if she wants. At her house, where shes not exposing your baby to anything lol.
No one in the room for delivery other than Dad… visitors was allowed later tho. Your baby your choice. Is my opinion.
To me it depends. About the hospital after giving birth, was your family and friends allowed to visit? I get that it is a private and emotional time, but it is also a VERY exciting and important time for your partner and his family as well. I believe dad had every right to invite his mom to meet his new baby.
With the corona, I understand a lot of people are scared. Especially new moms! But again, I need to ask is it his MIL that isn’t allowed to spend time with the baby? Or is your family ane friends also banned from your home until all this is over? Have you and your partner talked about this? Is he on the same page as you?
If ANY of your family or friends are allowed to visit then MIL should be allowed to as well.
If you are 100% staying on lockdown, no one comes in and visits then okay, tell MIL that. Tell her you’re sorry she feels you are being unfair and you hope this time passes quickly.
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Offer her Facetime? Send pictures? let her talk to the baby over the phone? Lots of ways she can interact with your son without being there in person. I totally get wanting to social distance, but there are ways she can still see her grandchild without actually being in person, and you should at least try to offer those as an alternative option so she isn’t 100% cut off. We all have to make small sacrifices to stay healthy. Seeing family shouldn’t have to be one of them, but that is greatly helped through technology.
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I’m an essential worker and it killed me to not be able to see my grandkids. So thankful for FaceTime it wasn’t the same but I new what was best for my grandkids. Maybe you both together need to explain to her the reasons, she needs to see it’s both your decision and not just yours.
Try to compromise with something like FaceTime. I hope she understands 
Absolutley understandable!! Little ones dont have the immune system to properly fight this. Im just fonally slowly letting people meet my 2 month old. As a mom its your choice to pick when you are comfortable for people to be near your little one. Dont feel bad. Your mil should also understand that she could easily pass on a sickness that she might not be aware she is carrying.
Can’t do for some and not others
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Idk, even if your friends and family came after the baby was born it’s up to you. You just had the baby pushed out or cut out and your comfort should not (no matter how often it is) be diminished in today’s world. And comfort includes mental and emotional as well.
We aren’t just baby makers; we have feelings and needs too. Select people from my family and friends came both visited each time we have had a child. My in laws were not welcome; but they are unstable on good days. I wasn’t going to repeat what happened to my sister with her unstable mother in law.
As far as the covid 19 and essential worker, I agree with you. As the mom of a 10 month old with breathing problems; it’s hard when even non essential workers push to see your children. There are so many online options available and if she is unwilling it’s on her. She had her chance when she raised her kids. These are your children and your choices.
You are not the bad guy it is your job as a mother to always do what you feel is the best for your child. I am all for you protecting your baby but sometimes keeping the peace with compromise is important too. Also, This social distancing should apply to all family members because it isn’t just essential workers getting sick. Maybe offer social distancing visits so she can atleast see the baby sit in the front yard at a distance or come up to a window. Also to address you not wanting her in the hospital that is 100% your right you were the patient not your husband.
When she wants to visit your son, she has to take a shower at your house, get clean, then she can visit. No going near baby till clean, clean clothes too, clothes she came in bagged and put outside or garage till she leaves.
If you let anyone outside of your home see the baby, then I could see why your husband won’t back you up on it. If the same rules apply to EVERYONE then she can suck eggs and so can the spineless husband. Anyone outside of your home can be exposed, essential worker or not.
Same thing happens with my MIL… she came in the room about 10 minutes after I delivered, while I was trying to get my baby to latch for the first time and while they were still pushing on my stomach to get everything out of me (TMI I know but it proves how she has no boundaries) it was her first grandchild so I get she’s excited but she took time from my husband and I to enjoy our baby bubble that I’ll never get back. Same with covid too… they weren’t taking the right precautions (masks distancing etc…) so I told her she wasn’t allowed to see him (we live in the same house though…) so both of my in-laws got mad. But I’m sorry… my baby my rules if you don’t like them too bad. It’s your child you get to make the decisions. She could make her choices for her kids but not yours. Especially when it comes to their safety!!! It sucks but stick to your guns mama 
to everyone saying “if you allowed any of your family there than it was only fair for his” i’m sorry, but i don’t want my MIL to see me spread eagle, i didn’t even let my mom down there she stayed up by my head and i was STILL uncomfortable. i don’t think you’re wrong at all. essential jobs are getting scarier everyday, and YOU are the mother. unless she just got tested and it came back negative and she had a new pair of shoes or a different pair than outside/work shoes and put on new clean clothes i wouldn’t let her see my baby either. as for not allowing her in the room when you gave birth, I SIDE WITH YOU. it was hard enough for me to allow my baby dad and my own mother in there i wanted to be alone but i was scared so they came with but stayed by my head. even then, like i said, was A.W.K.W.A.R.D.
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Its your hubbys job to deal with his mother!!! End of.
I would be respectfully honest with her, and it really sounds like your husband need to be more than you because that is his family. And leave it at that. If she can’t respect that, then she can’t respect your child. You can do video chats and things like that until this is all over. We are entering a second wave of this and from what I’ve seen it will be worse than the first. Nothing is more important than your child, and that includes family feelings. Stand your ground, you are not in the wrong on this!
They’re both disrespecting your boundaries. Those are very valid concerns and I also had to be the bad guy and say no to my MIL in the delivery room. Thankfully my husband respected that and I ended up having 2 c sections so she wouldn’t have been able to anyway. Have a talk with your husband because if he doesn’t respect your boundaries his mom won’t either.
Why is it all about you? What does your husband want? He is also 50% parent.
You wanting to protect your child from Covid is understandable. You could tell her to come freshly showered in clean clothes. Have her put on a face mask, and gloves. I can understand your MIL’S feelings. Baby’s grow and change so quickly. I find it odd you did not want her at the hospital at all after you gave birth. Did you ban everyone except your husband from coming to the hospital? I could certainly understand the delivery room bur the hospital??? I think that is a bit unreasonable.
I went through this too. My fiancé’s Mom made sure she was IN the room while I gave birth. Even though I only wanted it to be my him and my mom and expressed that very clearly on multiple occasions.
That to me was something very private and I did not feel comfortable with her in there. Only days later my fiancé’s mom would call him in fits because I wouldn’t leave my daughter there for her to watch. Keep in mind I was breastfeeding, not producing enough to pump for me being absent, and it was my first baby. No I’m not leaving her there for a few hours and NO she’s not staying overnight. My daughter was also colicky and she didn’t want anyone but me as an infant. Fast forward to me leaving my fiancé due to infidelity and physical abuse, and she was accusing me of keeping My daughter away from them. Yes I did because her father drove around drunk with her, she allowed it and told me she couldn’t and wouldn’t stop him because he’s abusive when he’s drinking. But I’m supposed to just trust them with her when I’m not there?
So NO you are not the bad guy. Protect your child and do what YOU feel is best for your child. You are his mother. As a mom to your husband she should at least try to understand why you’re separating yourself right now. Don’t stress it. Enjoy your time with him and let her be mad
I wish my in law’s cared to see our kids
Try talking to her??