Do your partners ever just make you so mad that you have to just walk away or you’ll say something you regret? We were outside today and my husband and I made a deal that he would watch our son while I rode a bike. We were all outside while his brother and I were fixing the bike so I could ride it. At some point my husband went inside without telling anyone looking for his dad and my son got attacked by wasp and stung 11 times. Now I’m the bad guy for being upset that he left without telling me. Like yes we were all outside but he was watching him. Now I feel guilty for all of it. Sorry for the rant but I don’t have anyone to talk to about this stuff.
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If you get that mad, say what’s on your mind…how old is your son, how far away from him were you…how do you know he was stung 11 times, did noone hear him scream after the first sting…
I’m sorry I have walked inside to get juices or to go pee while my kids where out side just fine then all of a sudden my baby was playing in the sandbox and got  bite by a bee! While my husband was riding bikes with my other kids even if I was out there playing with my 5 year old at your swing set and watching my 3 year old by my self it be hard to run over there and stop it ! But 11 stings eh hard to believe
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Depends… how old is the child and was he stirring the wasp up
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You’re entitled to your feelings BUT think about if the roles were reversed…even if you just turned your head for a second. Most people tend to beat themselves up more than the people verbally berating them.
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You werent riding the bike yet so he probably figured you were capable. But he should have given you a heads he was going inside. I see both sides. Accidents happen. All you can do now is learn from these mistakes and do what you can to make your child feel better. Also probably need to take out all the wasps nests in the area too.
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Definitely dads at fault !!! U agreed to watch him so if something came up he could of shouted over to you that he would be bk in 5 mins aw how ever long an u could stop what h were doing until he was free again , don’t no age tho but if I say under 5 then very silly , could have just took him with him , poor boy 
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How old is your son 
poor baby either way yeah if he doesn’t feel guilt theirs some issues because I wouldn’t have to even say anything to my other half he would be beating him self up big time !! Let alone it could have been worse kids are fast and this is a scary place lesson needs to be learned from this I get accidents happen I have three soo yeah but that’s a big accident
Capture the wasp nest and during shower time see if the wasp like the enclosed bathroom scent of the walk awayers
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Why even ask a simple question like this?! I don’t get folks
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Dad’s fault… you left him in charge while you was with the other boy. He definitely should’ve gotten your attention before leaving to boy alone.
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Were you still home when he got stung or already gone?
- You shouldn’t have to “make a deal” for him to watch a child he helped make! 2. Depending on how old said child is (i.e. a toddler that should never be outside unattended. However I am wondering if you were already gone on the bike ride or were you in a garage/diff area than the child was? If you were both within eyesight of your child, even while fixing a bike then I would say the majority of the blame does still fall on your husband and you have every right to be mad BUT it only takes a second to glance up from what you are doing. I am a major worry wart tho (wouldn’t wish it on anyone!) So even if my husband is watching our 3 1/2 yr old, I still check in and keep track of him. Not mom shaming in anyway, I swear! Mine burnt his hand just a few months back because my mom left her stool by the stove after she was done cooking. Stove was already off but I have a flat top and didn’t know she left the stool till my son screamed at which point I flew and even shoved the hubs out of my way. Mistakes do happen momma! No matter how much precautions we take! (I’d still let your hubby have it tho for not at least saying something!)
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I’m so sorry that happened to your son. I hope he recovers quickly. Ps, your husband is definitely in the wrong here.
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11 times!!! Poor kiddo! Dad should’ve been watching him 100% (especially if he was very young)… For me when my hubby and I are outside with the kids and one of us is busy doing something the one not busy stays with the kids… always. Never leaves without saying to the other “oh hey I need to run to the bathroom” or whatever… I hope dad feels bad cause 11x is no joke
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My ex and I make it a rule to tell anyone around us when we walk away from our kids. It just has to be a ‘you it for 5 minutes’ or ‘hey can you watch the kids for 5 I’m going to the bathroom’.
I would be hella pissed at anyone if they just walked off on my kids without giving someone a heads up and even more pissed if my kids got hurt during that time.
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I fail to see how this is any way your fault, if you made the arrangement prior that he would be watching your child … 
All he had to do was tell someone he had to leave his “watch” to do something so that someone could have been there while he did whatever he needed to do, but sometimes, everything is too difficult for men.
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both should have been watching him 
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My question is…How was dad going stop a wasp stinging your son 11 times? Regardless if he was watching him or not like did your child aggravate the wasp in some way.
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if the kid was gonna get stung by wasps it was gonna happen no matter who was watching him.
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Yeah, that’s not a dad…
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Girl … take some accountability it’s not even about having someone to blame. Wasp or not, there were clearly adults with him. Chances are dad being out there wouldn’t have made a difference. If the kid was small enough, you would’ve been keeping a better eye … if the kid is like 6-7+ get over it. It happens and it’s really no one’s fault. Clean up your wasp nest
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Hope he is feeling better from the stings! Yes you watch then hand off to the other person… thats how women work!
How many people can really work on a bike at once? You’re mad your son got hurt but your anger is misdirected and this page LOVES to villainize men/fathers. I was holding my son’s hand when he was stung by a bee. No one is to blame. Things happen sometimes.
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Mama no need to feel guilty. Yes I would be upset also. He know how you feel so let it gonits dine and over with. Next time same situation just remind him if he needs to go inside to please let you know
I hate when someone gets mad over your reaction to what THEY did wrong and attempt to make you look like the bad guy. You shouldn’t feel guilty over this. Your partner is adult and should’ve told you he was leaving (even if it were only for 1 minute) because children’s curiosity can cause unthinkable disasters.
That’s ridiculous to be mad about tbh. Yea it sucks, but even if he were out there what would he have done??? Wasps are nasty. He should have made sure someone else was paying attention to your son before going inside… but how many adults were there? No matter what everyone should have eyes on every child and be paying some level of attention… are you mad at the adults who were around and witnessed the wasp attack without preventing it or…
sore hope he will be OK praying 
I really thought this was going somewhere else… like husband goes inside and son wanders off.
It sucks when your child gets hurt. It’s normal to want to blame someone. But getting stung would have likely happened if your husband was there or not. Do you think your husband being there would have stopped the wasp? Bees attack fast and even if someone had eyes trained on your son, it’s unlikely that anyone could have prevented it.
You don’t say how old your kids are but I’m guessing they’re on the younger side. My best advice is to not get swallowed by the guilt when your child gets hurt because it’s very likely not going to be your fault. They are going to trip and skin their knees or fall off their bikes. Don’t focus on “blame” just focus on trying to help them feel better. You can’t raise them in a bubble and you won’t be able to protect them from every bee sting. You CAN teach them how to handle these things and don’t let fear keep them from being kids.
There’s not always someone to blame and I don’t think there’s anything malicious on either side… but a conversation would probably help (non-confrontational). First you need to let go of your anger. Then tell your husband that you probably overreacted because your son got stung and you were upset. Ask him to please just let you know if he’s going inside so you know to keep an eye out but your son probably would’ve gotten stung regardless. Think about it, if someone was blaming you for your son getting stung- you would probably feel terrible. There’s no need to do that to each other for something that was unavoidable to begin with. I’m sure that once you relax and think about it logically, you’ll realize that it was probably inevitable
Sounds like a narcissist 
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If you all were out there with him, then you all shouldve been watching him . Its one thing if you were actually riding and he walked in and left him, but you working on a bike while he walked in for a second isnt a big deal. He probably wouldve gotten stung regardless
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When bad things happen, people argue, and blame point. The important thing is for you (and husband) to always be a team.
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It sounds like miscommunication on his part. He should’ve given you a heads up.
The wasp still would’ve stung the kiddo even with dad or you right there. It happens. Keep up on pain relief and ice packs. And the both of you need to look everywhere for the nest.
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I stepped on a bee as a kid with a multitude of adults watching me; who’s to blame? Not the adults. Sounds like there were several of you present that could have been watching (takes a village and all). A courtesy of “hey, I’m running inside for a bit” would have been nice, but it sounds like you were still there too. As a mom, even if I ask someone else to keep an eye on my toddler, if I’m still within eyesight; I take it upon myself to at least know where my child is. And wasps are quick, even if someone had been RIGHT there; there’s no guarantee the stinging could have been prevented.
He should of atheist told you he was going in so you could be aware of his were abouts and you could keep an eye on your daughter
I just hope the child is ok that’s alot of stings by a wasp. Who cares about the who done it! Good Grief! I bet husband feels Terrible.
Why do you feel guilty? It was clearly his job to watch your son and he didn’t do it! Your son could have died from that many stings!!
Totally his fault!!!
Don’t u feel bad it isn’t ur fault…
Accidents happen, let it go. Father and child learned a lesson today.
You know that wasps don’t care if it’s Mom or Dad standing there right? It was perhaps a misunderstanding but don’t waste your time being mad about it.
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Nobody’s fault but he definitely should of communicated
Yeah I would’ve been mad. What if your son had an allergic reaction? A lot of kids get hurt or even die because 1 adult thinks another is paying attention when they aren’t.
The entire story sounds toxic to me…that would be the day I made a deal with my husband to watch our kids…like what? Granted he could have said hey I’m running inside for a minute but unless you were going to cover your child with a shield he would have gotten stung regardless…. Def learn to how communicate a little better …
Makes me laugh how some people are saying she should of been watching the child when the agreement was dad watches child while she’s preoccupied, if dad’s watching child why would the mum feel like she needs to?? She shouldn’t because dad is supposed to be FFS 
now I bet if this was the other way round people wouldn’t be saying dad should of been watching him oh no it would be mum should of told dad she was leaving blah blah blah
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Dont move somewhere with a pool or a busy street
It was an accident, have a respectful conversation with your hubby and get over yourself
Those of y’all saying it’s both there faults how? How do y’all know when she isn’t around he is doing the same thing by leaving them alone like that? I would be mad at the fact he was careless but not at the fact of the kid getting stung because that can happen at any time. I have be stung twice this yr myself once I was walking got me right in the arm and once at night it went down the back of my shirt and stung me in the back
It’s nobody’s fault he got stung. I’m sure everyone feels bad about that. You asked him to watch the son so you could go on a ride but you were still around so I think had the kid not got stung you would not be angry about anything
Realistically speaking, accidents like wasp stings happen even when a child is being watched.
My oldest kiddo got stung by one that snuck in the house. He was 5. I was in the kitchen and he was in the living room.
Husband was at work.
Should my husband have been ticked off that I was in the kitchen and ‘let’ our child get stung? No. In fact if he had berated me I’d have probably left him 
So here is my question to you about the wasp sting specifically: if you had been the one watching the child what exactly (be specific) would or could you have done to prevent it?
If your answer is I don’t know or involves any kind of action that could be considered a super power then yes, you absolutely are wrong for blaming your husband over the wasp sting.
Now. Leaving your child unattended while outside is a completely and totally different subject.
How old is your child?
Front yard? Back yard?
Is there fencing? What kind of neighborhood do you live in? Ect ect.
These are relevant factors.
And ultimately in his mind there was at least one other adult present to keep the child out of major harms way.
Should he have communicated to you what he was doing? Yes. But it was also probably an honest mistake not intentionally careless.
Edit to add: crush up a Benadryl and and an ibuprofen add water to make a paste and put directly on the stings. It helps a ton.
Ask yourself if he had been out there would anything have changed? If not, what is the point?
My daughter was in the yard with 5 family members, including me, when my grandparents dog attacked her. This resulted in 83 stitches in my 15 month old’s face. Should I have been angry at her father, stationed in Germany or my sister that was holding her hand or my grandparents for owning the dog or myself…the blame game doesn’t change a thing. Move on and use your energy for something more productive…I’m sure he feels bad enough without your disdain. 
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No one can watch my children better than i can. Regardless of who is “watching” when I’m there. I’m always keeping and ear and an eye on them. It’s not really anyone’s fault. Shit happens. It sucks for the kiddo, but ultimately it still could of happened even with him out there.
Honestly why play the blame game? It happened. Deal with the result, and make sure you have a "Bug Bite Thing’, u can buy it on Amazon for $10. I keep a few in different places because the faster u can use it, the less pain the child/adult will feel.
Why does it have to be anyone’s fault? Everyone is so fast to push blame on others. Accidents happen and honestly would have probably happened if you were watching him unless you are some up his ass helicopter mom. I see why marriages are failing so fast cause everyone is so dramatic over everything and they bring it straight to the internet.
Bs he was supposed to watch the child. No excuses he messed up. Not your fault.