My Son Is Moving Out, How Do I Cope?

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QUESTION:

"17 yrs ago I had my son. Things were tough when he was little, I was a single mum and trying so hard. Fast forward and he's finished school, starts a great job in 2 weeks, and moving out of the home. I'm so proud of him. But my heart just breaks. I've been dreading him moving out but at the same time, I'm so proud he's on a good path. I want to ask, how do you cope when your kid leaves the nest? I just feel this deep sadness but I am so proud of him and want him to do well. This is just my emotions. He knows nothing of my sadness, I don't want him to know. I will miss him so much."

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"I think for the sake of your birthday it’s something that I would deal with for my partner but everyone’s entitled to their own feelings. I can’t really blame him for not wanting to go. She’s really hasn’t done anything nice to or for him so if he doesn’t want to be around it then… that’s what he wants. Maybe your mom and you can get lunch instead since it’s more casual for you two and have dinner or other plans with your husband & stepdaughter."

"I don’t personally know but I do know my mom went back to school and that ultimately made her happy again she met new faces of all ages and many stayed very good friends after school, I still see them around at family gatherings. It makes my mom happy and I also feel very wholesome seeing her so comfortable"

"You’ve got to find a hobby or something to fill your time. It also helps if you’ve got other noise in the house like pets or friends or something like that. Now is the part of motherhood where you get to relax and just be there when he needs you. You get to look deeper into yourself and find out new things to enjoy. You both are growing into new stages of life together and that’s pretty beautiful."

"Just another chapter of life…it will be rough at first but I promise it does get easier…plus it's all on a positive move…BE PROUD…lots of good things will follow"

"Perhaps consider therapy to help with the loss. It’s okay, these are hard feelings to deal with when you feel alone. You are not alone and this is okay. Do not feel ashamed, many mothers need extra help, and once again this is okay."

"You’ve got this mama. Keep in mind that you raised a wonderful, successful, independent man. You did a great job!"

"Mine left years ago - I went to work - that helped a lot."

"When my youngest son moved to Florida I was so heartbroken, thankfully, we can facetime each other"

"My mother-in-law, a very wise lady always said, children are like birds, you have to let them fly. A few tears are ok."

"My daughter moved out at the same age and it made me sad at first but once I saw she was doing well I was ok. She only lives about 10 mins away so we see each other often. I still have her room set up as it was when she lived at home and she’s about to be 23. It will be ok and just let him know you’re proud of him and hope he visits with you often."

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