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"I have two sons a pre-teen son who is on the small side and a younger one who is going to be 6’+ when he’s older. My oldest is struggling hard core right now. He is the shortest boy in the middle school at 4’7” but of course has a personality larger than life. He loves playing sports but is bullied for his size and made to feel insignificant. On the home front he is made to feel insignificant while at his Dad’s. He asks his Dad if he can spend time with friends and his Dad’s reply is “we’ll talk about it.” I have him in therapy but he broke down tonight crying that no amount of talking to adults makes it better. He talked about how other kids don’t have a parent that beats on them and why can’t he be normal. I’m heart broken. I have zero proof of his Dad hitting him but his distraught is wearing him down. I could use any and all advice. I’m at a loss as to how to help beyond continuing his therapy sessions."
TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"When he goes dad put small camera on him somewhere"
"My now 19 year old was really short until 11th grade year. He grew a foot. He’s now 6ft from 5’2. He may catch up."
"Wow. Some of these comments are questionable at best. The best thing he can do is own it. I know it’s hard, especially at that age…but there’s not much that can be done. So long as his Dr isn’t concerned, I wouldn’t be. One of my best friends is a 26 year old male and he’s 5’4. We call him Tiny B (last name inital)."
"Bring short is one thing that can’t really help you cant help I also have a son who’s also very short and in middle school but the fact that he’s saying his dad is beating on him please take that super serious he’s telling you something that he was afraid to tell everyone else"
"Boys grow at a different pace. High school year is usually when they go through a crazy growth stage… Now about the dad. I would find out what he does if there are bruises have pictures taken before he leaves and when he gets back, have some write in a journal when it takes place what happens. You want proof you find a way. Yes your son should not feel this way at all but it will get harder before they get better. The dad is way more concerning than school. Words of “your still growing it takes time to comfortable with everything your body experiences but give it time” educate him on how male body go through so he gets he isn’t done growing… the dad I would handle maybe that is why he is so down and out and believing he is not good enough because he doesnt “fit” into someone idea of how someone should look. Look back when did the bullying actually start and does it connect back to when issues came up with the dad…"
"My son was also the shortest in class. He turned 15 and wow what a growth spurt. 6’ 2 and it seemed like it happened over night."
"My son was the shortest until his junior year and then he shot up. Males can also grow into their 20’s. Kids are cruel, he will either have to ignore it or stand up for himself- my son did both. The thing with his dad, your son should tell his therapist. By law, the therapist has to report it."
"He needs to speak up if his dad is hitting him he needs to tell the therapist so she can report it or you have proof to file a police report. I wouldn’t send him anymore"
"Take care of the abuse first! Then worry about him being short. I think the self esteem of the abuse is going to break him down that much quicker. Talk with cps. If he is in middle school. He is old enough to report the abuse. Have him go talk to a school counselor. They are mandatory reporters for abuse!!"
"He feels beat on by his dad. He is at an age to decide to go to court and not visit him. There are other young men who are smaller also. But he is still growing. He should go out and try things to see what he excels at."
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