I have started a new job, and my son stays with his aunt and grandma, starting from 4 pm-10 pm. Yesterday he threw a huge I have started a new job and my son stays with his aunt and grandma starting from 4pm-10pm. Yesterday he threw a screaming and crying fit for two hours asking for boobies from them when I left (he hasn’t done this before). His grandma, who has constantly been telling me to stop nursing for the past few months, told me I need to stop breastfeeding right now cold turkey. I fed him that night, this morning when he woke up, didn’t breastfeed all day, and then fed him when I got off at 10 pm tonight. I desperately do not want to stop breastfeeding I wanted to go until he was 2 (currently 13 months) so I plan on keeping the bedtime feedings and the wake-up feedings but cutting out all day time feedings, so hopefully he is okay while he is with them. Is this a bad idea? Should I stop breastfeeding cold turkey as she told me to? Will keeping bedtime feedings and wake up feedings make it hard on him during the day still? I feel bad that he is throwing fits and so miserable while I am not there because he wants boob, but I feel like quitting so suddenly may not be there best idea but maybe not quitting cold turkey is an even worse idea? Obviously a first-time mom lol please give advice as to what I should do!
Why not pump and give in a bottle or sippy cup?
You can pump your milk and give it to him in a bottle/cup instead of personally nursing. You’ve got to think of those people he is staying with while you work.
Honestly the moment you began planning to go back to work you should have stopped or switched to pumping. Especially if he’s forming attachment issues to breast feeding. Pump and give it to him that way.
I was gonna say pump too. Try the sippy cup idea because he can also drink juice from it and he should figure out within a few days that he gets sippy cup when mom isn’t with him
Quitting cold turkey can hv some huge enotional side effects. So much pf breastfeeding is an emotional attachment. He is prob wanting more cuz he isnt understanding why or what the sudden change is and its causing extra stress brratsfeeding is a h8ge comfort. My advice try to slowly shift them to night or pump but when u r home he is wanting to nurse instead spend some time with him. Filling up the emotional side will help him ease into a new schedule. Mom of r breastfed all to at least a yr. Also if u dont want to hate ur boobs when ur done do chrst exerciese when u can and it will help.
You can still nurse at night and during the day. You are only gone a little while. A cup or bottle should totally hold him over. Your boobs are his security blanket.
You do what your child and you need or want…not want someone else thinks! Nurse that babe every chance you get and pump while you are at work so he has mommy’s milk while you are away. You got this momma!!
Personally I’d just do the night time feed, bonding time before bed.
Those saying just pump, unfortunately for a breastfed toddler it’s about more than the milk itself. Plus when a child is actually nursing they are getting more than a pump would get because there is a biological reaction between mother and child.
Regardless, children have to adjust. That’s life. We can’t always protect them from that and we’re doing them a disservice by protecting them from new experiences, learning how to adjust and learning how to be confident in themselves. When we see our children upset, it upsets us, but if they see US being firm and confident, it lets them know that they can trust us. He will learn that he can only nurse when mommy is home and he will adjust, the fits won’t last. All they need to do is sit and talk him through them, calmly and confidently. “I see you’re upset. I know you want boobies but mommy is not home right now, you will get boobies when she is back. Is there something else I can do to help you feel better right now?” And let him process his emotions.
I think I would ask why set on the age 2? Is that just bc that’s what you had initially planned or a belief of most beneficial to child? If it’s the latter continue on bedtime and morning, if it’s just bc you wanted to do it until 2 then try to change the schedule. I feel children get used to things and change is hard for them and us to for that matter. Breastfeeding is a binding time that makes them feel safe and happy you could explore other bonding ideas like bedtime massage or have your child help make breakfast something you two do together. Each circumstance is different so you judge how your child needs to be weened not someone else. My granddaughter has a certain schedule and if it disrupted she does have a tantrum bc it’s different so for nap time which is when I have her she needs outside okay time then a warm bath then a massage of feet arms and back, with relaxing music, I know it sounds like a lot but the results are amazing how well she naps behaves eats everything it’s what she needs so that’s what we do good luck finding your balance
Do you want to have to quit your job just because he wants your boob? No one wants to deal with a screaming kid for 2 hrs
I would keep with the morning and night feedings. My youngest daughter self weened at 14 months, but from 12-14 it was only in the morning and before nap/bedtime. Do what feels right for you and your little.
Pump all your breast milk and start bottle feeding him it, and give him sippy cups with breast milk for lunch .Still gets the benefits of being breast fed. This will help him adjust to being away from you and the boob feedings . but at home bottle feed him as well.
It’s pretty normal for changes to induce boobie obsession too. If you dont wanna stop pump and send it with him and keep your new schedule of nursing 
He just misses you! The routine is new and he will get used to it. But yeah we might try pumping but if you don’t want to quit nursing then dont
My dear if you have to work then you have to pump your milk and give it to him that way it’s hard on him for you to do it once in awhile he’s to young to understand why mommy can’t be their all the time
My daughter is still breastfeeding and will be 2 in nov. I went to work when she was 13 months and she transitioned to whole milk MIXED with whole milk strawberry yogurt while at daycare. She loves her yogurt milk and she still asks to breastfeed in morning and at night. Your son will adjust eventually, give him and yourself time.
Don’t let anyone tell you to stop doing something that is good for you and your child. I wanted to stop breastfeeding at a year, I wanted my body back, I spoke to a lactation consultant and she said that it’s best to keep up night nursing until about 18 months if you go this long so you can gradually wean and the child will understand a little better, and that made sense to me so that’s what I’m doing. You stop when you are ready, don’t let anyone else tell you to stop or continue only you know what’s best for you and your baby. And way to go on your breastfeeding journey!!! 
Sounds like he’s just wanting mama. What you do is up to you, hopefully he will adjust to knowing that when you’re not there, there’s no boob to be had. It sounds like this just started happening, all the adults involved need to be patient and see if he adjusts 
If you’re happy with still breastfeeding when you’re present then do that! I wouldn’t consider a change unless a couple weeks go by and it doesn’t get better.
I’d stop nursing him or quit your job and stay home and breast feed him. One or the other.
The baby should be drinking milk at 11 months lord
The next best thing dear
Your kid is old enough to ask for boobs, it’s well past time to stop nursing.
Quitting cold turkey would be traumatic for both of you. And do you want mastitis, because you could end up with it stopping suddenly
I worked and night time breastfed until my daughter was 21 months
He is looking for comfort because his routine has changed. Pump and have them give it him in a sippy cup and one of your shirts to snuggle while they rock him. The Gerber ones don’t leak. If you don’t want to stop breastfeeding create the routine of the late night and morning nursing. It might take a few weeks but he will settle in. You can wean him from the two nursings a day when you’re both ready.
Do not quit breastfeeding until you are ready. Remember this is YOUR baby. YOU do what u feel is best for you and baby. So pump and use the nipple/boob bottles. Just cuz u went back to work does not mean you need to stop. And it sounds like these people need some education…
The suggestions to stop cold turkey / choose your job or breastfeeding are hilariously ridiculous ! Don’t listen to that! Hang in there mama! He must be missing you. The pumping and sippy cup/ bottle suggestions sound good, if you’ve started doing that already just keep at it and honestly infants are super smart, prepare him for the day by actually telling him what’s to happen! That you’ll go to work, and when you’re back you’ll feed him again , in between who’s gonna be with him, how’s he gonna be able to drink milk… this may sound silly to some but honestly they understand and will adjust way better!
I breastfed my first until 12 months and he self weened. My second, I cut him off cold turkey at 14 months with not much fuss. I breastfed because its good for them and because its cheaper but I hated every minute of it. Was so glad to be done.
I’d express for while you aren’t there and carry on feeding while you are. I’m currently still feeding my toddler she’s 3 in December and my 8 month old son. (ive breastfed all 4 kids) what he’s getting is made for him he will soon adjust once my son was born my daughter went to just morning, nap times, when she was hurt and bedtimes and night wakes and she’s soon got that she has it at those set times, she will happily take expressed milk too. It’s not just for the milk he will need boob it’s a comfort too like a dummy is to a bottle fed baby. He will be looking for the comfort just as much when you leave. It’s all new to him so he will take time to feel content with you going and leaving him even if it is with relatives. Your baby your choice. If you feel he still needs BF then that’s what needs to happen. Your his mum you know him best.
He will adjust, just give it some time. We are practicing leaving my 5 month old who is breastfed and it’s hard on everyone because she cries the whole time I’m gone, but with more experience to her being away from me and the boobies the better and it will be the same with your child. Dont stop breastfeeding, even if you do stop it’s not going to stop his attachment to you. He will still cry and scream until he gets used to you being away.
Girl keep breastfeeding as long as you and babyboy want to.
Maybe try breastfeeding right before leaving for work too… That way he can feel.the comfort of having mom before she leaves.
You should do what’s best for you and your son and ignore everyone else If that’s pumping for while you’re away, do it. If it’s still feeding him and adjusting your schedule so its good for both of you, do it. No one else’s opinion matters.
Don’t stop until you want to! Try pumping some milk for them to feed him, does he eat food and drink juice? He should be by now. So, he’s getting nutrients when you’re not there. But if they can snuggle him with the breast milk. It might calm him down.
I would nurse him 3 times a day. Morning, right before you take him and at night.
I stopped bf with my kids at 16 months (not my choice) 2 1/2 and 2 yrs. Then i currently have a 2 month old.
But she’s different than my other 3. She loves her paci. My other 3 kids never took one. They were depended on me for comfort.
You’re the mother, you know best. The consistent schedule will eventually help your child know what to expect and he will adjust to just night and morning feedings. It just takes time.
You stop when YOU and him are ready. Not when anyone else tells you to
Do not stop breastfeeding your baby he needs to get use to milk slowly before you just stop breastfeeding I breastfeed my daughter until she was almost 3 years old I pumped milk for her to have during the day at daycare while I worked and I slowly introduced her to milk when I started not producing enough and she eventually on her own stopped asking for it you and your son will know when it’s the right time to stop… when my daughter was just a baby after a 4th if July parade I went into a little dinner and sat in the back corner with my family and breastfeed her covered up nothing was shown I had a guy come to me and hand me one of those water bottles they throw during the parade and tell me he thinks I might need to use this I shouldn’t be doing what I was doing in a restaurant while everyone eating… I then took off the blanket I was using and told him I didnt want to watch him chew his food either. He walked out of the restaurant and several people actually clapped for me as he walked out
I would tell grandma to mind her own tits but maybe that’s just me.
Its your child you do what you want. Find a way to make it work if its what you want. I learned this from experience I wanted to breastfeed my daughter when she was born but I let my family talk me out of it because I was still in school… I regret it. If this is something you truly want then make it work or you could regret it.
You do what’s right for him and you. Why can’t you continue to feed at night, he will adjust to your new routine.
I’ve found, that some advice from older generations can be good, or it can be completely detrimental or somewhere in between.
If you want to nurse at night, nurse at night. He’s your child.
He’ll adjust it will just take time. He’s use to getting your boob whenever he wanted it and he can’t understand why your mom and sister won’t do the same for him. I suggest pumping, your work by law has to give you a quiet private space to do that. Nurse him at night he’ll slowly start to understand
I may be the unpopular opinion here but the fact that your kid asks for “boob” or “boobies” is pretty strange to me. Asking for “milk” or “Mommy” or something like that, fine. But asking for the “boob”, no. And I agree with someone else above who said if your kid is asking for “boobies” he’s probably too old to breast feed. If you want to still give him breast milk, sure. But I would be pumping and not nursing. Just my opinion, since you asked and all 
Pump for him before you leave for work.
Just another reason I’m glad breastfeeding never works out for me
He is old enough to stop breast feeding he should be eating food by now it’s time to break him just like you would from a bottle the longer you wait the harder it will be there are other ways to bond y’all will be ok
My last child nursed until 2 years old. But when it was too much for me all day and in your case you are working. I changed to no nursing during the day only at night. I wore regular bras and would show her oh no see not time. And I would keep the same schedule during the weekends also. Hes crying due to his routine being changed and you are no longer with him 24/7. It will take him a little while to adjust but do not stop nursing cold turkey while he is adjusting to a routine schedule and your absence from 4pm to 10pm. That is a lot for a child to understand all the change and his little mind is trying to process
He probably misses you and will take time to get used to the new routine. Boobies is comforting for them ask grandma or aunt to just give him extra cuddles for a few days til he gets used to the changes, but you shouldn’t have to stop bfing him for that to happen.
Ok so grandma and aunt are watching the baby for you… are they watching him for free? They are the ones watching him/her. They may choose not to watch your baby anymore
I worked and still breastfed full time. I would pump on breaks and my daughter got used to it coming in a bottle or cup, she didn’t like it at first but did adjust and so will yours
I’m don’t stop cold turkey! Breastfeeding is amazing!!! Pump some milk while he’s sleeping and only let them give it to him with he’s absolutely having a fit. If anything have them offer him water. My mother kept trying to get me to stop and I’m so glad I didn’t, you made it all this way don’t stop now.
Stop when YOU want. He will get used to not having boob when youre gone. Give it to him when you do have him.
Sounds like your toddler is giving you, the adult, an ultimatum. Be a walking meal or go back to work 
He will adjust. I wouldn’t quit. But be prepared for him to take a while to adjust.
Also aunt and grandma need to help distract him better.
Splitting your feedings like that is hard to do, you’ll find your milk supply might dry up or be hard to control. If he’s throwing tantrums I suggest moving on and away from feedings. He’s old enough to eat food so it shouldn’t be worrisome. Do cuddles instead, he’ll still feel comforted like that it’ll just take some adjusting to
He probably just misses you and asking to nurse is the only way he knows how to vacolize that. I would let him pick out a special cup he can have with grandma/aunty and maybe a special stuffed animal he can snuggle when he misses you. I wouldn’t quit cold turkey especially when neither of you are ready.
I breastfed my youngest until he was 2 I did morning and bedtime feedings and sometimes before nap feedings and it’s what worked for me and him don’t let anyone tell you when to stop it’s your choice not there’s
With my first I reduced it to only nap and bed time feedings for a long time before quitting all together, she was fine with it. Cold turkey will be hard on both of you.
Do what you feel is right. Do not let someone else tell you what you should or shouldn’t do. I nursed both my boys till 2-3 years old. It is healthy and there is nothing wrong with extended nursing. Your doing a great job mama.
He should be sleeping through the night and not waking up for feeds like that at 13 months. I’d stop and make sure hes getting his 3 meals in and just a drink before bed
Grandma has no right to TELL you to do anything. Not her kid. Not her boobies. She can SUGGEST all she wants but I’d nip that shit in the bud before grandma is making other decisions for you too.
I stopped breastfeeding my son at 18 months. And he did fine transitioning.
you absolutely should NOT have to stop breastfeeding especially cold turkey, it can be quite a traumatic thing for bubs!
at 13 months he’s still a baby, my 20 month old is still breastfeeding, but I have cut his feeds dramatically as he was nursing ALL DAY and all night…
your family need to support you on your breastfeeding journey, its quite easy to distract a child, are they not giving him attention or playing toys with him? I mean for him to have supposedly had a 2hr meltdown shows they did nothing to comfort him or take his mind away from boob.
Pump for him you certainly do not need to stop feeding your baby, I fed my first till 14 months, my second till 18 months and my youngest is 2 in November and still hasn’t weaned
I think just slowing down is better than going cold turkey
NO ONE but you gets to decide when YOU stop breastfeeding YOUR child…
When I started work I pumped for my daughter. She hated a variety of nipples until we found one similar to the form/shape of my breasts and then she started taking bottles. I was still breastfeeding just not from my breasts. She didn’t like it at first, but she adjusted. I stopped nursing (from the boob) when she was 9 months old because she bit me twice and her teeth were sharp, but I continued to pump until I couldn’t produce anymore. She’s almost 3 now.
Like others have said, it’s totally up to you! Do what’s best for you and your kiddo! Only you can decide ultimately what works best for yall. My daughter was a blanket baby so she had a blanket that smelled like me and her and that would soothe her at times. Good luck mama!
It’s just something he will have to adjust to it will take some time but he will get used to the schedule you stop when you or your son is ready
Mom of six here…breastfeeding is an amazing thing and an amazing connection for you and your little one. Please don’t let anyone but you decide when you will stop. I think your plan to nurse in the morning and afternoon is a wonderful idea. I have breastfed my own children and I now keep a little one that is being breastfed by her mom in the morning and afternoon/ night only. She takes a bottle/ cup for me during the day with no issue. There was a slight adjustment period in the beginning but it did not take long. Ask his caregivers to please be patient during the adjustment phase, it usually doesn’t take long…and enjoy your breastfeeding connection with your little one as long as you like. 
I have two children that are now 16 and 15. I only breastfed my 15yr old. I am pregnant again , 6mths and I plan to breastfeed this one as well. Breastfeeding is the best thing in the world for a child! Oddly, I notice the difference in my two oldest children 💁 as to which one was breastfed! I know you said that this is your first but trust your instincts as a mother. Do what you feel is necessary , do not let ANYONE tell you any different. This is your child, the most important relationship you will have in your entire life. The bonding is phenomenal with breastfed children , it helps with brain development and also immune systems. Give your child the chance at a healthy life if that’s what you want to do! I only breastfeed up to 6mths (usually) everyone is different, however, go as long as you feel fit , your his mother and nobody else. 
I am proud that you chose to breastfeed! Women are remarkable creatures. Do your best cause that’s all that matters. Good luck to you and God bless 
Listen to your gut. YOU are the mother. The older generation doesn’t get it. I nursed until 18mon and my son quit on his own. He’s having a hard time adjusting to the changes and nursing has always been his comfort. Nurse when when you can.
After maternity leave I had to go back to work which was night shift I eliminated the night time feedings. I would pump breastmilk so it would be available when I’m not around. Neither one had store bought formula. I have two healthy children because I breastfed till they were over 2 yrs old and they weened themselves. You can adjust your sons feeding schedule to follow your work schedule. I’m a formula fed baby and had to live with many allergies and other problems that could of been avoided if my Mom breastfed me. Please don’t give up this wonderful and natural thing God provided.
If it’s a problem for the people babysitting then u will have to stop. They can’t be “tortured” daily while u work. Or maybe wait to work until you’re done nursing. I do believe he will quickly realize tho that when you’re at work no amount of crying will help and will be just fine nursing at nite
You don’t have to stop. His tantrums will get better. Hes only one and he’s having to be separated from his mama which is not fun for him. Not only does breastmilk support his body and mind in such a massive and crucial way, it heals and protects and comforts. If you are comfortable continuing then do so. A lot of the older generation doesn’t seem to understand the positives of breastfeeding because they have been taught so hard and so long that bottle is best. (At least this is true in my experience) He’s going to have fits when you leave even if you stop, they may even get worse, becuase he wants his mama even if the word hes using is for boobies. Find ways to support grandma as she is having a hard time. Is there anyway you can postpone going back to work or mabe work shorter days? It’s a sacrifice but a worthwhile one in my opinion.
I breastfed for 2 years; first year exclusively and second year mixed between breast and bottle because I went back to full time work. Don’t stop breastfeeding because of the current hardship, this phase will pass and you will be glad you kept breastfeeding until he is 2. Ignore other opinions, especially from family - they mean well but make things worse.
My oldest daughter self weaned down to morning and bedtime feeds around a year old. There is absolutely nothing wrong with doing this!! Grandma doesn’t get a say.
I stopped when you said you didn’t want to stop bf. i know you don’t want to and you don’t have to. There’s other solutions as well like pumping? The only one who will suffer here is him and the poor babysitters.
Throwing a fit does not equal misery. It indicates frustration and all kids learn to deal with their frustrations. It is impossible to protect a child from becoming frustrated. This is his opportunity to figure out how to self soothe. Don’t worry he will emerge fine and unscathed by not getting the breast just bc he wants it.
Try pumping. Have them give him your night shirt or a blanket, that you have nursed him with at least 3 days with (do not wash it), to hold. Mybe something silky or fuzzy. Every time you nurse give him the blanket or shirt. Every time he gets a bottle with brest milk he gets the blanket or shirt. Don’t switch shirt or the blanket, always the same one. And try not to wash it for a while. At least until he has become aculamated to the bottle or a week or 2.
But what ever you do don’t stop nursing.
It is a transition period. You went to work it is all new to him. He’ll adjust in a couple of weeks. Keep doing everything you have been doing
If he uses a sippy cup … your plan is perfect. All children have to adjust when mom goes back to work. He is just missing you. Give him time he will adjust to new schedule.
If I were you I would keep doing it. Until feel like you need to stop.it’s your child not her’s. You do what you feel is best for you and your child.
Don’t stop because of someone else, enjoy this time with son whether its once a day or all day. You know whats best for your family. Leave him a cute sippy cup during the day. Don’t give up.
You are the mother. You do what is best for your child. You have the right to decide when to stop breastfeeding.
Start will a new bedtime routine and ask caregivers to do the same…a bath, a story, a song…a new special routine that can replace nursing when you are away…it could be a reward too…a stuffed animal, age appropriate toy or book.
My son is the same age and I’m nursing in the morning before work and when I get home.
one thing you could try is pumping…that way he’d still get the taste and health benefits of great milk…
Dont stop just because someone is asking you too. He will be okay. Its an adjustment period for him. If he’s never stayed with anyone for that amount of time without you then it’s probably a comfort thing. My son (19 months) still nurses but only when he wakes up and naps. I stopped nursing him at night anf instead make him a sleepy time tea blend. He still asks for milk occasionally but I just tell him he can drink his tea (I’m trying to transition him to putting himself to sleep). Only stop when you are ready. That way there are no regrets. You’ve got this momma 
Your baby, your body, your decision. Keep it up if that’s your goal
2? Have you lost your Fucking mind. Should be on a cup by 6 months. Stop having children.
You stop breastfeeding when you and the baby are ready. How old is this baby? Why is your mother telling you stop breastfeeding?is he 4,5,6 years old.? Why cant you pump at work?
Don’t stop breastfeeding, mornings and nights are perfectly fine. My two yr old gets mornings, naps and nights still
I think he really is just missing you and asking for comfort
Maybe he’s teething and breastfeeding helps his gums feel better?
It should only be done till hes 1 year old
Nope. Keep doing what you’re doing 
Only allow him at nite
If you want to breastfeed fine, but dont bring a screaming brat to someones house and expect them to deal with that! Its rude and selfish. Either get him a bottle with breastmilk or watch him yourself
Ignore his shit and stop altogether