You say you give her equal attention but do you ever give her any undivided attention. This sounds a child who really needs that right now. In two years she has had a lot changes in her young life. Think about that. Maybe between the three adults in her life you all can work something out where you all take turns doing something with her alone. Doesn’t have to be much at all. She is likely feeling overwhelmed by all the changes in her life.
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My husband and I have a 6, 5, and 2 year old (and a 1 month) our kids were all so excited to have a baby sibling, they’re interested and offer help and love touching and holding her, they fight over who’s sister she is lol
But ultimately they have really started misbehaving and fighting with each other and not listening…totally out of control most days, saying things I’ve never heard them say before (like they want each other to just leave and stay away from them) and it’s happened ever since we came home with the baby. I really think it’s just them trying to adapt to something new and they’re trying to work out their emotions. Even though we try to do one on one with each of them equally, they still feel confused. I think a little patience and some extra love might go a long way with her. I hope so anyway because I’m not sure what else to try either lol
Best wishes💞
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She needs to know that shes loved and wont be forgotten!!!
Give her time that’s normal
You’re gonna have to wait for the baby to be born. Just include her in as much as you can and when the baby is born, have her meet y’all at the hospital and let her hold the baby and if you’re bottle feeding the baby, ask her to hold the bottle for you.
She needs one on one time with her dad! Its jealousy yes but, its due to feeling like she doesn’t get the attention from just one on one with him. It’ll get better!
When my 3yo says he doesn’t like me I make a point of acting really hurt and dramatically fake cry. He runs to hug me and tell me he loves me. He’s been getting a bit short with his brothers (all full brothers) but I just remind him that’s he’s not being nice and we love him anyway.
Terrible 3s are worst than 2s
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That doesn’t even sound like acting out. That sounds like a very normal reaction to a very young child gaining another sibling. She isnt yet old enough to know how to appropriately cope with her feelings.
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Try to do things to excite her about the baby coming. Give her a special job to help you out so she feels included. Maybe let her pick out a new stuffie to give the baby. She’s just scared 
little people have big feelings and can’t always express what they feel.
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Look up redirection techniques
Let her sit it out, shes 3
Unfortunately it’s normal. It’s great you are all co parenting but unfortunately it won’t really change yet. She has a bunch if feelings in her body and she’s afraid and confused. Try doing one on one dates with her all threes of u. (you can rotate 1 day a week throw all the kids so it’s equal but I’d suggest to start with her or honestly sometimes 1 kid needs more help then another for a period of time and that is ok.) try getting her to help pick out stuff for the baby. Get her a baby doll to pretend to be mommy too. My step daughter is 5 almost 6. She acted the same way at first when I found out. I was having a baby with her dad. Even tho I’d been step mom to her for 3 years now. Unfortunately it took awhile to get better her mom wasn’t helpful tho and caused more issues. But I had to set aside time for her and us (she has an older brother so unfortunately I did have to spend more time with her to adjust.). We got her a baby doll and baby doll crib set. And that helped a bit but honestly it’ll take time. That’s all. Even after he was born she was still jealous but she has also been diagnosed with an attachment disorder and a couple other things so it was expected. But it won’t last too long mama. It happens with continue a bit and soon she’ll love that little one and see she still gets time with u guys
She 3 man give that baby some time bless her lil heart she feeling lonely
Seems like normal behaviour for a 3 yr old and it also sounds like she has been through and extreme amount of changes in her 3 short years. Give her time, love, patience and consistency.
typical toddler behavior. Just find activities just for you both to do. Bond with her through this rough time in her life where she is trying to understand whats going on from emotions and life changes