Being a stepmom is hard! I’ve known my stepchildren for almost 4 years already and the is so bad…I try to give him the benefit of the doubt but I am getting tired of dealing with it… We use to have 50/50 custody (his behavior was manageable then) but their mom wanted child support so she has a little more now… she also could afford a lawyer and we couldnt… Anyways ever since this change he has gotten worse…talking back…trying to hit…you name it he does it…We’ve tried grounding him, taking away games and making him go to bed early. We have even tried sitting him down and talking to him, explaining to him what he did wrong and why he shouldn’t do it again. Nothing works…If anyone has any words of wisdom that would me great.
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I’m not trying to come off as rude but honestly your answers are in your post he has less time with dad more time at moms which maybe isn’t ideal for him or something is going on when he’s not with you he’s most likely acting out because something is happening that he can’t control I’d take him to counseling and give him a safe place to talk most schools have counselors if you don’t want to go to a private one but don’t give up on him remember he’s a child
How old is he and i would try the sitting down and talking again but this time instead of telling him what he did wrong and why it was wrong, ask him why he’s acting out and talk through together how to fix it, let him explain and listen actively. If possible maybe also involve a family counselor for yourself, him and his dad to help mediate.
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Sounds like he’s having a really tough time. Adjusting to a change like that is tricky for kids. Try to continue to be patient and understanding. Focus on the good behaviors you want to see, give praise for doing well. Try to work with him with the negative behaviors, try to help him through the things he is struggling with.
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Any ideas why he may be be acting out ? Maybe ask him if he is okay and if there is anything he’d like to talk about. Or if he wants to see a counselor and talk to someone who isn’t in the household ? He’s still young and learning how to communicate and regulate emotions.
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Counselling. The mother might (and I said might) be telling him he doesn’t have to listen or he could be angry that he doesn’t get to come over a lot and his retaliating because he doesn’t know how to communicate.
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Counseling is a must ! If he does these things now imagine what he will do in a couple of years.
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