No help from her no more extracurricular activities or money or clothes ita simple… the only thing you are suppose to do for her is feed her and give her a roof…everything else you do for her is not really something YOU OWE HER OR HAVE TO DO… she is being a little ass… then you take away what she likes. She needs to learn that she has to respect you.
Take the phone,an get her Birth Control,an rules.
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There’s lots of good advice here.
Oh! you so need to stop! Stop pandering to her. This behaviour hasn’t started as a coming up teen! It started when little, you over compensating for the lack of her Father. Now you have the hard yards. You have to stop feeling guilty and giving in. It will be hard but stick to your rules you think she has to follow, don’t give up when there are repercussions. Only way you are going to get her back. Aslong as you manage to do this, you will have her back and she will be thankful. You have to be hard initially though! Best of luck.
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Cut back don’t spoil her
Cell phone, is my go to for “punishment”
Stay consistent. Love her for where she is at. Pretty normal behavior if you ask me. We have a 15,14, and 13year old.
*None of them like to do chores.
*All of them act entitled.
*all of them act like I’m the worst in the world.
Good luck 
13 year olds are so hard to deal with. Just keep stern & make her “earn” money for the extra things you said. Let her know your boss & mean business. My daughters 20 & we still get into arguments & heated discussions. It is exhausting
Ask your mom for advice and “wwsd”. (What would she do) Roughly at that age, I was getting into legal trouble too. My dad sent me to live with my grandpa for a summer. Not as a punishment (dad lived in Ohio, grandpa lived in Florida) but for some good ole fashioned family time and getting right with my roots. No friends. No social life. Just me and grandpa. And honestly, looking back at my childhood, that was the best summer I can remember. Especially-since my grandpa has been gone for 6 years now. It’s bonding time my siblings and cousins didn’t have-and it allowed me to miss the rest of my family. Even with blowing two tires driving a car trailer back to Ohio-turning a 16 hour drive into 20+… it was a blast.
Something that gets me by…
Their brains are developing and they won’t understand certain things until after they are 25.
Development of their brains is a huge task and sometimes causes these types of behaviours.
Remember she’s figuring out how to be a person and that’s not easy…
Regulating your emotions and not taking it personally will help (although it’s like a dagger in the heart) set boundaries for yourself and follow through with the things you think will teach her respect responsibilities and duty make a clear line of communication…
I have a book for my 10 yo son so when he’s having big emotions and he “doesn’t want to talk” we communicate with this book he writes everything in it and when he’s ready gives it to me to read… I find being able to distance myself and read allows me time to think how I want to respond to him.
I try to be the person I needed when I was 10 to my son, he’s still naughty he still says mean things I still get flustered and yell it’s normal however we’ve been able to develop a relationship where we can be cross be sad and mean but when he goes away he thinks about his actions and 99% will apologize off his own back…
It’s not an easy ride I think about how I acted like a mean little troll to my mum said some nasty things that anyone else would of left… Mum’s don’t leave and I can promise that after decided to be an adult and treat her with respect I was able to apologize for all my stupid bad behaviour cos I really hurt her…
You’ve got this. Please don’t take it personal your daughter doesn’t see the world like you do she’s still little. You are amazing she knows that she knows you’re home (probably a big reason she lashes out knowing you’re her safe haven)
I wish you a happy journey of learning about each other you finding your feet and your daughter growing up to be everything and more you’d of hoped for…
Put your foot down, sounds like you’ve forgotten that you’re her only parent that gives a toss. Make her earn her privileges the same way you had to. Take her for a night time drive through places that have homeless. Make her join you in a soup kitchen. Buy second hand clothes and let her know you’ll provide for her needs but her wants are something she needs to earn.
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Teach her to be a strong independent women or the person she ends up with down the road is gunna end up with a leach it won’t be good for either person if she’s going to keep acting that way