I need some advice, I have a 15 year old girl who half does her chores, we had her do dishes and she wouldn’t do the dishes on the counter so we changed her chore to sweeping and mopping the living room and she stopped doing that and now her chore is to feed and water the chickens and we just noticed that she hasn’t been watering the chickens. What can I do with her or a chore we can give her. As punishment we have taken her phone away and no internet for the rest of the day. But I’m at a loss as to what to do with her, everyone of my kids has a chore they have to do everyday and she is the only one who just does the least possible in the hopes of getting away with it.
19 Likes
Take everything away until she does her chores for a week without any issues.
5 Likes
At 15 she’s plenty old enough to know better. I would make it a system. You want phone and wifi for the day your chores from the day before MUST be completed or you don’t get your phone in the morning. But actually stick to it. She doesn’t do them because she knows you’ll just do it and she won’t have any real consequences. After a few days or weeks with no phone she’ll get it.
13 Likes
Be more strict with the punishment, no phone , internet , tv for a week
2 Likes
Stop doing her laundry. No spending money or privileges. Nothing new. No phone or internet for at least a week. (Unless internet needed for school).
7 Likes
Familylink is a parental app that installs on your phones. You can set a lock time. They can still make emergency calls, but everything else is disabled at the time you set. We use this for our 17 year old. She does her chores, she gets extra time.
1 Like
10 swats for every day she does not do her Chores 
I’m sorry. I don’t understand “she won’t”.
If she wants wifi, any devices at all, a TV, to leave the house for anything beyond school, money for anything, she absolutely will. She needs discipline and boundaries. Your job is to teach them to her.
You do know it’s ok if your kids are mad at you, right? 
Let her be mad. Decide her chores, decide consequences for not doing them correctly. And make them hurt. Not physically, of course. Take her devices for a few days. Take her TV. No, she can’t hang with friends this weekend. No, she isn’t getting money for anything. If she can’t do what she has to do, she doesn’t get to do what she wants to do.
She is a part of a family unit. Everyone has something to do to help the family run smoothly.
If she loses her stuff for a few weeks, oh well. It won’t kill her. She’s leaving in a few years. She works at a job like she does at home, she’ll never hold a job.
Probably most important, when she does it right, thank her. Discipline is important but so is saying Thank You.
6 Likes
Is she depressed ? My 13 year old is the same before she was diagnosed with social anxiety and is now on medication.
1 Like
I’d stop changing her chore, she may be seeing each of these changes as a victory -she is defeating you because instead of making her complete her job you are letting her off the hook and giving her something different. It sucks as a parent but I’d give her a chore and stick with it, even if that means you are watching her more closely and giving her constant reminders. She won’t like that but maybe it will motivate her to do it right to get you off her back
26 Likes
She won’t do it??? UH WHAT???
Oh yes she will!! FFS BE THE DAMN PARENT! She does nothing else until it’s DONE! Period!!! She wouldn’t get the phone back at all, for a week!!! I can’t with parents like this……
For every chore that she doesn’t do
Take every thing out of her bedroom apart from her mattress , her pillow and a blanket
My 3 grand kids aged 16 down to 9
Do their all their chores each week
With out having to be told to do them
You need to practice hard love
Not soft parenting
She is plenty old enough
1 Like
If your teenagers are not telling you at least 3 times a week they hate you , your parenting wrong, she knows what shes not doing and your letting her get away with it. I always told my teens , im not asking what you want, im telling you what your going to do. Be a parent not a friend
11 Likes
Stop accommodating her behavior. Make her do the dishes. If she doesnt do it right she can stay there until its finished. If she refuses take the phone and all other electronics. Every time she does this add a week with no devices. Stop coddling her laziness.
3 Likes
No, phone or internet for the REST of the DAY! Try 1-2 wks. Sounds like you let her get away with things to easily.
8 Likes
I wouldn’t give her any type of electronic until whatever chore you tell her to do is done, one chore is super easy she’s lucky to only have one.
12 Likes
At 15 I figure she has a social life. My kids weren’t a lot to go out until chores were done. They had to be done to my approval. You’d be surprised by being constant how they learn to get them done.
They want to be with their friends.
2 Likes
You are letting her get away with it by changing it everytime. Make her do it.
2 Likes
Does she have a phone. I’m sure she does. Most people do. Get it and use it. Take everything away and make her earn it. U can do this. Be strong. Don’t cave momma!
2 Likes
What my parents did was if we didn’t finish the dishes we had to wash dry and put away every dish in the house and would supervise to make sure we did. They were old school
1 Like
Stop changing the chore and be consistent with the punishment.
1 Like
She is getting away with it. You keep changing her chore and each time seems to get easier and easier. Some kids are strong willed and adaptable and won’t care what you take away from them. Gotta stand your ground and stop changing the chore.
2 Likes
You don’t change the chores, you discipline for not doing her allocated chores.
She will soon realize.
5 Likes
She turns her phone in and WiFi is off until her chores are complete. I would change her chore to the original one and stop letting her get away with not doing them.
3 Likes
My son does the same thing until I take his phone and computer then he does it. Then he doesn’t get his stuff back for a couple days either
1 Like
Just a day? Take the damn phone permanently. Ground her to her bed without TV or anything else. Be her parent and not her friend.
She’s testing you… take her phone away until she does what she supposed to do… you have to show her you are the parent… she will not get away with it… when I was growing up if that was me… I would have been on restriction …no phone. no TV. no going out… until my stuff got done and done right
From my experience, my kids are easily motivated by a $10 bill 
What you’re showing her is that she’s in charge. She doesn’t want to do the chore assigned to her, she doesn’t do it and then y’all change it up. Punishment , if that’s how you choose to do, should be after her refusing the chore. Not giving her another one
3 Likes
I’m dealing with this with my oldest of three. Start taking things until a change is noticed and be verbal on that with her! “Well we’ve been having issues with this, this and this… so until we see a change with this, this and that we’re taking this.”
Stop changing the chore and make her do it or stand there until it’s done
Take away privileges. No phone,no tv,no electronics, does her own laundry. No extras,no fancy foods, no snacks. Can ride bus,or walk.Add additional chore each day she doesn’t do them. Day 1= 1 chore. Not done= 2 chores. Not done = 3 chores.etc.and remain consistent.
She’s 15 and you are treating her like the boss of the house. Do you think a job in the outside world would be so accommodating? She will be a worthless person in society
My Mom would have snatched a knot in her butt! Believe me that worked!!!
No phone or internet for at least a week. If she gets am allowance cut it. Make her wash the dishes, clean the living room and take care of the chicken all in one day. Don’t back down or change her chores
I am NOT an expert !! However, i do have some suggestions. Do you do her laundry if so stop, make that her responsibility now (this becomes a self inflicted wood if she only does it half way). Be prepared for wet clothing in the wash for a day or 2 but an extra hamper and just put the wet stuff there if she doesn’t finish and you need use it! Try a lesson in half of what you do for her, it’s crappy but hard lessons
2 Likes
Changing chores, getting out of doing chores, or incomplete chore - is exactly what you don’t do. If she doesn’t understand what a “complete “ job is - do her laundry (wash only) put the still wet and unfolded clothes in her room - you do half the chore - dinner cook only half a meal - either vegetable or meat - opposite of what she likes. Drive her 1/2 way to school - explain what a complete job is.
If she gets money for doing them stop
Do not give her phone, wifi, whatever until that day’s chore is done.
Absolutely not electronics until her chores are done completely
Try adding some motivation
Don’t feed her or clean her room or wash her clothes
1 Like
Talk to to her. Explain that every person needs to contribute to the household and she can’t expect to go through life not doing work. How does she expect to survive in the real world without basic cleaning and cooking skills? She needs to be able to take care of herself as an adult, no one is going to do it for her. And then I would take away ALL privileges until her chores are COMPLETED. I would make it well known to her that no fun exists for her until chores and homework is done. Only after those things are fully completed can she have access to privileges or permission to do fun things.
We didn’t have a choice at my house and if we didn’t like the chore tough is what my mom would say. Take away everything including the bed. Like my mom said you live here rent free and all that stuff I paid for. If we didn’t do it I would be in a bare room sleeping in whatever was on my back on the floor.
Make her redo them the right way or until she does it correctly.