I need some word of encouragement… I’m really struggling with my 4 almost 5 year old. I’m pregnant with my second and someday are worse than other with how frustrated I get with my son. Sometimes I feel like such a shitty mom because I feel like I’m constantly yelling at him for not listening, among other things.
3 Likes
Its ok momma. Remember to take a deep breath you got this. One day at a time sometimes you need to take it hour by hour. But you go this.
1 Like
Ask him questions like, “Why do you think I asked you to do X?” If you can get him to think and come to a conclusion, it will help him see your point of view.
Give gold stars for every time he does listen and follow directions, or doing something without fussing.
Make sure you do something renewing each day: treat yourself to a facial mask, a hot bath after he goes to bed, a foot roller massage, some yoga poses, meditate, do tai chi. If it’s decent enough out, go for walks together or by yourself if there’s someone else to watch him.
Carry stress balls to squeeze, punch pillows. Do jumping jacks, sit ups, jog in place to dissipate your anger.
But know you’re perfectly imperfect just like every mom losing their sh!t. My son got in trouble so much his little sister learned to say his name as MicKEY!!
Oh darling I’m pregnant with my 4th and have a 9 year old 8 and nearly 2 and I feel like all I do is yell and I feel like the worst mum in the world but you’re not motherhood is fucken hard and being pregnant is harder xx you got this if you need someone to talk to message me please xoxoxo
I definitely relate. I felt like that a lot and still do some days. One kid, 2 kids or more I think every mom feels this way. I had to find other ways or to walk away and hide in the bathroom for a min to reset. It’s ok to pause and take a deep breath and then address things.
My daughter is 6 and my husband and I together have two (6 and 17) and I have to go into a work mindset. I wouldn’t yell at work but I would repeat myself. I would have a conversation or give a reason for telling someone no or stop. Adjusting the language for the age I’m addressing is the difficult part. “Stop doing that, it’s dangerous and not ok to do without help” the repeat is “I have already said to stop, I know you heard me. You are choosing to not listen and there will be consequences if you continue”. And if they continue then I follow through with consequences or my husband steps in with consequences and reiterates “mom already said to stop”. This also works with around the house tasks. At 5 I used painters tape on the floor and had her sweeping, pickup trash, rinsing dishes etc.
On days that feel impossible and it’s non stop rule of thumb is outside or water. Put em in the bath and let them just play for a bit or take them outside. Too much energy inside and behaviorally they unleash it so getting it out in physical movement helps to mellow them out.
2 Likes
Its hard for me to grasp how one of two children stress you out. I raise 6, infant,2,4,6 8 12. Their ages. I enjoyed the day to day caring for them. They wasnt bad kids nor where they good all the time. They where typical kids. My house was super clean, i made homemade health meals and they stayed clean. We discipline them and didnt let them get away with doing wrong. There was when it called for paddling but mostly a stern voice and look. After all this they are really great employed citizen and a couple owns their own business. They have never been in trouble with the law and I am and have been bless to have them in my life. I hope you can find an option that will make life easier on you. I am 73 years old and have beautiful well mannered grandchildren. I will pray that you figure it out.
1 Like
Where’s dad? Teach him he doesn’t know anything. He’s a blank canvas and sometimes they need hands on. I understand but try not to yell at him breathe and regroup when you feel frustrated.