Pros & Cons with being a SAHM… Hubs is trying to get me to stay home but ive never not worked
I love it, but I also own 50% of our company, so I don’t have to worry about him leaving me broke. I would never if I was left feeling financially dependent on him.
I love staying home with my daughter, but I also work
My husband was the one that stayed home with the boys. He also homeschooled them. He kept up with the kids & the house so I just got to enjoy time with my family when I was off. It was fantastic as they got to be raised by their dad & we had so much more freedom of being able to do things together based on my schedule. They are grown & moved out now…was just telling my husband I am ready to be a SAHM now LOL.
Every house house and life styles are different. You need to make out your own pros & cons list.
It was not for me, I tried it
Pros- Time with them. being there for all the moments. Raising your own kids. Not paying big bucks for childcare. No worries about bad things happening in your daycare/at your sitter.
Cons- it’s isolating. If you don’t have a big fun money budget, it’s lots of time at home with no other adult to talk to/same tasks over and over. Also a potential con if you divorce and your work history is non existent- but there’s always alimony. Another con is finances, for me i didn’t make much of anything after paying for childcare, but some people might give up a great “second” income to stay home. It can be hard budgeting or having no fun money and trying to still be a fun parent.
Been a sahm for 7yrs…i like staying home with my kids but it gets lonely without adult interaction. Constantly having to do everything for the house,kids and husband gets to be repetitive. Now that all the kids are in school i have found a hobby i enjoy doing.
Sahm wouldn’t change being able to watch my daughter grow up for anything
As a stay at home mom I have been present for all of my babies first moments. First words, first crawl, first steps, first time walking without falling down. Everything. I have gotten to spend quality time with my children while they’re were/are little. I’ve made sure that no one hurt my kids because day cares are really unsafe. I’ve gotten to bond with them and create memories together. There are so many benefits to being a stay at home mom. I’m not going to lie, not working has been hard for me too. Sometimes kids can be overwhelming and sometimes moms just need a break but even with that being the case staying home with them and watching them change and grow has been worth it
The mom guilt. No adult interaction. Being the only one caring for the house and kids at all times and then doing the same for husband after work and never feeling like it’s enough. Chance having no income being held over your head. Lots of cons. But the pro here is that you raise your own babies, watch them grow and know they’re safe at all times. But honestly it’s all perspective. You can make the best of the worst day. Just have to get out of your own head.
I SHAM but nanny to stay busy now mine are in middle
I love being a sahm.
I love being able to be there when I’m needed. If the school calls I’m right there. I never miss a game, a practice, an appointment.
My husband takes care of the finances, rent, electric, water.
I pull out what I need for the week (groceries, laundry detergent, food for the animals.) I take care of everyone. I love it.
I think the cons of it would be (impo) I feel guilty not having an income to help (even though we don’t need it), I literally live and breathe “mom and wife” that’s all I feel like I am SOME days, not all the time.
But I get stuff done quickly and efficiently without the kids being home while they’re at school.
pros : seeing your child grow up, not missing the big things. knowing the things taught are things that are proper. all of it really. it’s all a plus.
cons: you literally never get a break. you don’t get paid. you literally have to ask for money for basic essentials which is a pride killer.
Best thing I ever did for me and my family. (After working my whole life). But everyone is different and you have to do what is right for you and your family. Working part time might be a good starting point.
Those first years are important in the little one’s life. That’s when the brain is building a lot of connections. We sacrificed some luxury so I could stay at home but I’m raising my kids and I’m taking care of them not someone else. Your teaching them, your there for their many firsts and your making sure your building the healthy development. It’s hard it’s stressful but it’s so rewarding in the end especially since the baby to toddler period goes so fast.
It’s difficult to adjust to going to SAHM straight from working full time. I got very depressed. If I could redo I would have went to part time and slowly adjust. I love my kids dearly . But I worked 40-60 hrs a week.
I stayed home for a little over a year and loved it until…my husband had a heart attack and his medical issues got bad. We them went from 2 incomes when I was working to 1 income to 0 income. I now promise myself that no matter how much my husband makes, I will always work. I never want to be caught up in that again. Also I’m looking long term. I’d like to have enough work credits to retire or ss to go to my kids should I pass away. We use to work alternative schedules and now that my boys are adults and it’s just my daughter at home, we alternate who gets off early to pick her up and I take her to school on my way to work.
Im a sah…grandma w my dauter and grand daughter…i wish i could have stayed w my kids…its a joy…plus…we dont do babysitters…strictly grands…or aunts…and never a day care until pre school and that is a private school…i know some cant do that…i was able to have my mom w my kids…and then they were off to private school…in todays world not all daycare is great…it major expensive…so…honestly…give sah a try…u will see baby gro…i watch my grand daughter…do all her 1st…and it fills my soul w smiles…
Being a sahm is nice and has its perks but omg you seriously miss adult interaction. I volunteer at the school just at have other adults to talk to. And nothing you do all day will be good enough…I busy butt cleaning etc and it gets over looked as not good enough a lot
Pro is being there to see your kids grow up, con financially difficult and loneliness for adult company. Option work part time on hubby’s days off, you get a break from the house and kids, you keep working and your hubby gains appreciation of what you do all day.
I’ve been a working married mom, single working mom, and stay at home mom.
I so so miss the sahm days!
setting and staying to a good routine for yourself and the family helps keep things smooth. get plenty of outside/event time when you are able, being home all the time will feel a little maddening. if your partner and you set up a good financial plan first- a certain amount of money for just you, aside from the bills and kids needs, then I’d say go for it. in the long run you will save in daycare and any unwanted or unthinkable situations by exposure to people you don’t know.
remember to get around adults on your time when you can lol I remember loving that friend time- love my kids but everyone needs adult time too!
The biggest con is losing time out of the workforce. That can be a negative you can turn into a positive. If you get blessed enough to be sahm use some time to learn new marketable skills. That way when the baby is older if you want to work again you have new skills to use.
See, after being in an abusive relationship you saying hes trying to get you to stay home makes me nervous. I know not all men are the same. Sometimes men make their wives be stay at home moms so they can’t leave. The wife doesn’t work so thats no income. So just be careful. If you’re a stay at home mom for a long time and you guys get divorced, you lose a lot because you don’t have income and you had a long unemployment history. Anyway…
Have a discussion with him. What are his “expectations?” Does he expect you to stay at home and do all the cleaning and cooking? Or does he want you home so you can spend time with kids. Some people think SAHMs need to do everything because they don’t “work”. I personally have never wanted to be a stay at home mom. I don’t want someone saying I wouldn’t have something if it weren’t for them.
Personally I love being home with my babies but I miss working. It’s demanding and lonely being home all the time.
I’m going on year 4 of being a SAHM.
I’ve always worked- full time, over time whatever time I could get. We lost our childcare now I only work 15 hrs a week and it’s def been a blessing in disguise. I love getting to be home and present for my kids. My youngest are twins who just turned 3 and my oldest is starting kindergarten next week and I actually got to take him in for orientation. It’s sounds small but it’s the things like that that I really want to be able to do
This is my personal experience I’ve been a sahm for awhile and currently a working mom
Pros: spend time with the kids never missing a moment, house is usually spotless, don’t have to deal with people
Cons: no money of your own, got repetitive from day to day, not much adult conversations, missing milestones, not much Time with kid during the week
I love being able to raise my children , I know they are safe and I don’t miss anything yah you go a little crazy but get good friends to chill with.
Yah some days are rough, but I’ve been lucky to stay home with each kid until school age I’ve watched them grow to amazing people. My kids are 11, 9 and almost 4 I can’t believe how fast time has gone staying home has been amazing
It’s hard as hell going from being the working mom to stay at home.
Depends on what you do to earn money, how stable your jobs and finances are. If you work in a specialized field in management, you could switch to consulting and keep up with professional societies to keep your skills up and connection to the workforce while you stay home. If you do something simpler you can fall back into, say retail sales, wait staff, even nursing, you should be able to take a few years off without a great hit to your career.
My then-husband was in contracting during a volatile period, so even though my entire salary pretty much went to daycare, I kept working in case he didn’t get new contracts we’d still have an income and medical insurance. I really missed my little guy and cried leaving him at daycare, but was better when my daughter was born & we’d had a routine.
I asked if i could stay home one year, but hubs said only if I simultaneously got a Masters degree so I could get a $100,000 job after. Neither was likely so I went back to work 6 weeks after giving birth.
I can tell you having had worked my entire life It is hard but so it’s going to work and leaving your babies
Don’t do it without discussing finances please.