Should I be upset about this?

Good day to one and all I have a question that is bugging me. I have been married from April now I have been hearing stories about my wife she was staying in this granny flat of a man that she knows. His wife made comments about them having a affair this I hear two weeks ago. But it was before we started to date but he since got divorced he called her about a week ago. Considering thay have been friends for a long time worked together as well. He asked her a strange question if she is still married. Need some help on this matter please no nasty comments

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I be upset about this? - Mamas Uncut

To me personally, it’s your spouses answer that should matter. I’d hope they either set some final boundaries or cut them off completely. If not, definitely express how this situation makes you uncomfortable.

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What was the response from your wife? I mean, I get comments from random ass men on fb saying “oh wish you were single” and I just say I don’t and then block them. I think its more about what was the response of your wife. Did she tell you he asked her that question? Did you see it in her phone?

I wouldnt put up with this. You deserve better. I would speak up to her/him. There was a time in my life i did tolerate and it made me sick. You cant help what you’re feeling. Accept/roll with your gut feeling you shouldnt be ashamed for that

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I wouldn’t put up with this. You deserve to be in a trusting and transparent relationship. Please speak to her and if it still continues, you know in your heart what you need to do! Good luck mate

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I would talk to her and see what’s going on but on the other hand,I wouldnt put up with it.

Speak to her that way you will find out whats going on good luck

He’s knocking on the door to an affair. The real thing that matters is if she answers

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You need to not worry about what happened before you and you to not worry about him contacting your wife. What you should be concerned with is her response. Friends or not, if she is entertaining him, that’s your issue. You can’t control others and what they say/do, only yourself and your actions/reactions. If your spouse loves you, she will shut that shit down on her own. If she doesn’t, you may need to reevaluate your relationship. Communication is key, so make sure you address your concerns with your wife and go from there.

First, the wife is in a granny flat of a man she knows??? NOT home with her husband? Why? I feel like a lot more is missing. If she is cheating it’s time to go. But honestly with her not even in the home it seems she already left.

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He probably wanted to talk his problems over with her as a trusted friend Sit down and talk all this over calmly in your own house Don’t just go by rumours because several people are just jealous and want to stir up trouble for someone else Your discussion with your wife is what is important to solve the problem Hope everything works out well for you both

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I ask are you still married when i know that you very well are and shouldn’t be messaging me. You’ll have to confront her

Doesnt hurt to ask your wifes response is much more important than the question.

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Have you spoken to your wife about this? I’m going to assume there has been SOME conversation about it because you know what he asked on the phone. Obviously he asked if she was still married because he has feelings for her,and that is okay, what wouldn’t be okay is if your wife reciprocated.

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Past is past. She cant control that he called, she can control if he continues to call. His question is legit and if he respects anything he’ll be gone.

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Talk to everyone involved

He’s looking for a way back in to her life be careful with this

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If they have had a relationship in the past and are still friends it would be hard to stop contact tbh. I guess it depends if you trust your wife…if there’s no trust there’s no point going on. People do still have friendships after splitting up .
Talk to her.

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Communicate your feelings. Let her know this is bugging you and you both need to address it. Hope it works out for you

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She had an affair with him while HE was married and they’re long term friends and coworkers, now he’s sniffing around asking her if she’s still married? no, nothing to be concerned with there, buy a handful of condoms and put in her purse and hope she’s honorable enough to use them

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I’d first talk to her. As someone who has had people tell my husband I “had an affair” when I didn’t, I say talk to your wife. The wife made the comment that her husband had an affair with your wife, did she say it out of spite. I had someone I thought was my friend accuse her husband of sleeping with me. I’ve also had someone call my husband and tell him I had an affair with a coworker. Neither were true. Thankfully he respects me enough to not entertain these accusations, atleast not without getting my side first. Talk to your wife. You’ll know immediately if there is anything to worry about. Either way if you are uncomfortable with the relationship with this man, she should respect that too.

If he’s questioning her relationship status, he wants more than friends OR he could be being respectful as to not cross any boundaries putting their friendship at risk…

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Just sit down and discuss this with her. Communication is a key to a successful relationship. Don’t tell or argue. Just talk and learn more about each other. Be mature adults about it. Never yell at each other when clearing the air. Your adults ,not children.

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What he does doesn’t matter, do you trust your wife? Ask how she is feeling about it all in a calm way before making up stories in your head and getting worked up… Communicate.

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Do you trust her? If not, you should not be married.

Communicate with her. Talk to her and let her know about your feelings.

He wants to bang your wife.
Be open and honest with your wife about how you feel in this situation and hopefully your wife respects you enough to do the same

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Just because he texted and asked if she’s married it’s not a cause for concern, now if she said yes and he continues to pursue her than absolutely I would be concerned. Unless your wife isn’t entertaining him at all then there’s no reason to worry. You didn’t specify if they are talking or not.

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Best I can say is talk to her about it.

If she had an affair with this man before you were with her it really isn’t anything to be worried about if you trust her. I’ve done some questionable things when I was younger. Doesn’t mean I’d do them now.

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She’s married no oh he’s just my friend act married that’s what I would say to her act married put in place boundaries with this guy Say this is pissing me off everyone is on the internet every time they have fights with there spouse Seeing if the grass is greener Where is her integrity you should not be put in this position what if a old flame calledyou

Maybe they had feelings for each other at one point all your can do is talk to her about it not us. Whatever she did before you guys got together is her business.

Whatever she did before you is not your business.
She is your wife so tell her what people are saying about her and the stories, but you may want to get proof about the affair incase it’s not true! Because it will be your word against there’s. If you know for sure she is having that affair then leave all we can do is give our opinions/advice it’s you that has to put your foot down! Good luck!

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If he asked and she told him it should be good… she should never ever be seeing him without you there… good luck and talk to her

A person’s behavior and lifestyle gives you the answers you need! Is this woman honorable in her life?

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If you want the real answers, talk to her. If you don’t trust her, y’all don’t need to be together. Without trust NO relationship will work

If u rely on what others say about your wife, and not what you know of her already, then you are better off divorced!

The fact you know about him calling her and the questions he asked her… says ALOT!! :relaxed: I don’t think u have nothing to worry about at all… let it go and enjoy being married…:purple_heart: congratulations btw :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

Why did he care if she was married or not?

Ask her! and if you suspect she is lying, then get out of a long miserable marriage of mistrust.