That’s her name and just because you’re mad at him . . .
Me and my daughter both want to change our names to my maiden name but I can’t change hers without his consent. And even though hes completely out of her life, no contact or child support, he refuses to let me change it just cuz he’s a dick
Does he pay child support? Mine never did, and when my mother remarried, she changed my name ( not an adoption, just name change). She had to go through court.
I don’t really see why it matters….Changing her name won’t stop her from asking questions when she’s older or noticing that somewhere she has an absent father. And it’s not like your name defines who you are. I would leave it. Unless she grew up and was like hey mom. This is Bs. Let’s change it.
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Does he pay child support?? Yes, he should be. It really is up to you. Ask the court system how it works. It should be easy enough. I hate the whole hyphenated thing, but that is an option too
Leave her name as his!! Even if he isn’t in the picture that’s her dad
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My son has his bio dads last name and my husbands last name. My situation is different though cause my sons real dad is dead and my husband took over. Honestly though it’s just a last name and unless you ex is a criminal or a pedo it’s just a name.
In order to do a name change, if the father is on the birth certificate you have to give him the opportunity to contest the name change. If he contests the name change, the judge won’t allow you to change her name unless you can prove he’s been absent for said amount of months/years which is called “abandonment”. This only applies if he hasn’t seen her for a certain amount of time and you’re not receiving any kind of support and zero contact.
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Only if you need to be so petty.
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My grand son had his name changed and is happy with it,
Ul have to ask his permission if he is on the birth certificate.
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Is there a reason why Dad chooses not to be involved ie trying to get his shit together? Sometimes, people don’t stay gone, maybe he will get a grip later in life and want to be a apart of it. I also would take into consideration how it would affect your daughter. How old is she? At some point in the future she may want to know her father and is it the right thing to do for the child? Ultimately, to me, it would be about what is best for the child and not what my feelings had to do with it. Again, just my opinion. Maybe wait a little while to see if he comes around. Praying for your little one.
My kids dad has not paid child support in over a year. Has not seen them in that time and only called to ask me to get with him. I will not change their last name because thats who they are. I have 13 year old g/b twins and a 6 year old boy. The older two know why we are not together anymore they lived it and seen it. They dont really care that their dad doesnt contact them because they know why and they both said they are never gonna drink ever. He is an abusive alcoholic. Now the youngest we split while i was in the hospital having him. He doesnt know and i wont talk bad about his dad.
You would have to have him sign his parental rights away.
My son changed his name to my family name when he was in college. His dad was very mean and manipulative and my dad helped me raise him. The last straw was when he refused to sign papers for my son to get free college tuition, and he volunteered to support an illegitimate child that a paternity test showed was his. This after not paying child support for many years to the two that carried his name. My son is proud to carry his grandfather’s name. The cost was minimal because Jon was over 18.
You can try, you may need him to sign something.
Ask a lawyer who specializes in name change. Don’t need to go to court. The lawyer will take care of everything and tell you if he needs to sign over his rights. It takes a month or two for the name to be legally changed. They have to make sure she has no debts or anything against her name no matter how old she is.
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That’s her dad no matter what. Sheesh.
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Hmmm…Just saying…I’m sensing no real or practical, “reasoning”, here for the name change question…I do hear spite and vindictiveness…not sound anyway to me…by the way…how old is your daughter…is she aware of/using her current last name in any way…hmmm…part of the equation
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i don’t blame you. i men, if he SAW her or interacted in her life somehow then yeah, keep his name, but…
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Don’t do it. It would be selfish and petty on your part. This is her name. Don’t make her like her name was a mistake
It’s most likely going to end in a battle in court because you most likely hurt his ego/pride. Both my daughters took my last name and eventually we changed one of them . But really and truly her last name will change when she’s married
I’ve been wanting to change my child’s surname. Even though he’s been paying a little bit of child support, he hasn’t seen him in almost 9 years. But he won’t allow it 
Depends. If she is old enough to know her name and what it means, ask her opinion. If she isn’t, I’d say you’re in the clear to do whatever you want. I’m seeing a lot of hate on here against you that “He’S sTiLl HeR dAd”, but he freaking abandoned his daughter. He’s not even a parent at this point. He doesn’t have a right for her to have his name if he can’t even be bothered to be around. That being said, if you do change her name, make sure you do absolutely everything needed legally. My aunt changed my cousin’s last name but only half-assed it and did her BC but not her SSN and it took her three years to get it sorted out as an adult because it had been so long and because her mom refused to do anything to help her.
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Of course this varies state by state …… but . After a while you can file abandonment , and have his rights taken . Then you can change her lastname without his consent . Otherwise if he’s on the birth certificate , you’ll need his permission to change it .
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Is he on the birth certificate??
Do it! If he abandons his child his name shouldn’t be attached to hers. It’s going to be easier to not have to clarify that you and your daughter have different last names when it comes to paperwork and certain situations too. Also less awkward when you kids gets to school abs has to explain why their name is different than yours because that will happen over and over again.
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I think it depends on the age of the child. Does she know her current last name already? Also, did he fully give over guardianship? Because he has to give you approval to change the child last name if he has not.
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It would be beneficial to your child emotionally to have the same name as the family. If the father is on the bc you will need his permission or you will have to show that you attempted to contact him for permission. Men have more rights than children.
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OK so I’m in Kentucky and I recently went through this. You will have to ask his permission if he’s on the birth certificate, but even if he says no you can argue your case. I had a warning order attorney send a letter certified, twice. He received both of them and flat out ignored it. He got 50 days to respond and his non-response was answer enough to have it approved. The whole thing cost me around $300 for the attorney and the paperwork.
My son is going to be four in May and has had no contact with his father or received any support since he was about 18 months old.
You don’t need an attorney if you can get him to cooperate but my sons father actually had to be located because he was out of state and I was not able to find him exactly
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For doing work in spare time i maklng $ 500 every day using my mobile. l never th0ught l c0uld d0 that, but my frlend w0uld earn m0re than $ 14,076 a m0nth and persuade me t0 glve lt a try. The p0sslbllltles are endless.
Change it. I recently got married and he is more of a dad to my son than anyone ever has been I plan on having my hubby legally adopt him and change his last name
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So, when you were together he was a good enough man and father for your child to have his last name, but now he’s not. If/when you decide to get married are you going to change her last name again to your married name?? I had a baby with a man I was not married to, my boy at birth was given MY last name, I’m still not with the father. This isn’t just about you, think of her also! Her name may change again when she gets married.
The only bad advice my mother ever gave me was to give my daughter her father’s last name.
And where tf is he now? Living 5 mins away but choosing to ignore his kid while raising his gfs kids just fine.
She doesn’t want his last name. Nor should he have the honor of having his name on the child he chose to ignore.
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My 15 month old had his dads last name for 2 months then I changed it to mine. N my baby who is due in June is having my last name.
I had the same situation my daughter is 14 now. The first 7 years of her life her dad had nothing to do with her then he comes back in wants her name change to his last name and listen 2 years later walk right back out into this day has nothing to do with her. I told him that if he wanted her name changed he would have to pay for it and she would have to agree she’s happy with my last name because it’s more than just the last name or a name is who she is.
Thats her Dad no matter what…she should have his last name…maybe add yours and hypenate it, and put whichever one you want her to use the most, kids with hypenated names usually use the first one down, so it seems to me anyways. My hubby is Quezada-Medina, but he uses his first last name only all the time. This way your daughter can choose, when she is older, which one she wants to use.
I went through this with my daughter. She was 4. He left when she was 3 months old. She wanted to keep her daddy’s last name, and that was absolutely fine with me, after all, that’s part of who she is. She’s almost 9 now, and her dad stepped up and came back into her life a few years ago. I know not everyones situation will be like mine, but leave it up to her when she’s big enough to choose for herself.
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In my opinion it’s just a name,it doesn’t give him anymore rights than what he has has now. I would wait until child is older then ask if the want to change it.
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In my stats after 18 months you can file for abandonment check how long you have to wait were you live then file for abandonment and change her last name to yours he may be the father but he isn’t a dad and doesn’t deserve to have his last name carried by your daughter.
I’m in Oregon and changed my sons name to mine. I had to fill out paperwork, serve father with paperwork, go to court and then post the order on bulletin for 30 days, then judge officially ruled the name change. Then had to go get new birth certificate and social security card for him. Whole process took about 4 months. I did have to pay about $200 in fees for all of this as well.
Mine was easy and as quick as process is available because my ex did not fight it in any way.
You need change it by deed poll, do it yourself not through one the agent sites as they charge more, think I paid about £60 cause how many copies of it I wanted.
If the dad won’t agree then you need to wait 4 years of abandonment to change the name. When you do you have to give the deed poll and a covering statement to everywhere that has a record of her e.g school, child benefit, docs … etc 
Ask her if she wants to change it.
It is her biological father. Maybe she wants it. Just ask her.
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Are her grandparents not involved either? It would be their name as well.
If the child is over a year old you have to go to court and since he’s her father and on her birth certificate he gets a say in rather or not to have her name changed. Just because your the mom dose not mean you have more rights to do what you want with the baby. Name changes have to be agreed on
Because like it or not he is the father
I thought about this when my daughter was younger. I didn’t, I wanted it to be her choice, although I also kept his last name when we got divorced. She’s almost 12 and her dad has really stepped up and is fully involved now, I wouldn’t even think about doing that. You just never know, and name changes are a pain.
I wouldn’t change her name. Whether or not he’s there right now or the fact that you’re upset with him, he is still her birth father and always will be. Besides the fact for legal issues like her entitlement for child support, his ss benefits if anything should happen to Dad and future entitlements she has the right to make that decision herself when she is grown. Doing things like this out of spite is not right and may only hurt or upset your daughter later in life. 
Ask your daughter how she feels about it
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Yes you should change it .if the father is out of the picture his name should be out of her name .it might be best for taxes purpose no claim no money to his name 
I didn’t even bother giving my son his dad’s last name. I gave him my maiden name at birth…
You’d be doing it to get at him. Stop using your child to do that. He’s her father. Just a bad one, in your opinion. Leave the child’s name alone and leave the child out of your bs
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I’ve changed my daughters,best thing I ever did x
For doing work in spare time i maklng $ 500 every day using my mobile. l never th0ught l c0uld d0 that, but my frlend w0uld earn m0re than $ 17,270 a m0nth and persuade me t0 glve lt a try. The p0sslbllltles are endless.
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He is the biological father, things could change later on.
I didn’t marry my kids dad and separated from them very early in their life. I regret not giving them my last name. At the very least a double last name. Depending on your child’s age I would say add your name to the last name or take his off altogether. I wish someone would’ve suggested it during my pregnancy. I definitely encourage any unwed friends I have to use their last name until they are married and while you’re changing your name… change the baby’s too. LoL
Allow your child to make that decision. It’s the child’s father and you cannot change that -
Idk about your states laws but in Illinois where I am if her dads name is on birth certificate you have to get his permission and you also have to have a court order to change her last name as well
This would be a hard decision! But if he is no part of her life in anyway and doesn’t pay child support then I would change it and if he ever decides to become a Dad and part of her life then let her decide if she wants to change it back later, or leave it alone! You didn’t mention how old she is but if she’s old enough to understand maybe you could talk to her and see how she feels about changing it! Hope everything works out and will be praying for you! Try praying and ask God to lead you into the right direction!
Depending how old your daughter is. I would ask her what she would want to do
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If u decide to do this an ad has to be placed in the newspaper before they can continue with the name change along with other steps if he sees it and speaks up then that can stop the whole process.
For doing work in spare time i maklng $ 500 every day using my mobile. l never th0ught l c0uld d0 that, but my frlend w0uld earn m0re than $ 11,978 a m0nth and persuade me t0 glve lt a try. The p0sslbllltles are endless.
Her name is gonna change when she gets married so what’s the point on changing it just bc he isn’t in her life…
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Yes I did it but you need the dad’s permission as well.
How old is your daughter? If she’s older than like 4, perhaps she should have a say? Maybe not the deciding factor, but maybe part of your decision.
You actually need his permission in some states
My classmate was 14 and his parents and him decided to change his last name to his stepdads name because he had his dads name and he wasn’t anything to be happy about. I don’t see a problem especially if they’re so young, make sure they are good with it and maybe even use it around the house or writing it so it’s definitely okay and she’s comfortable. I love this idea, before I knew where my dad went I wanted my moms last name too. And if she’s too young to even care, just use it and make sure she doesn’t oppose it. But I don’t even think that’d be an issue unless you have a weird last name that goes weirdly with her first name 
I would. Both my kids habe my last name. They had to earn it… vand if it meant soooooo much later they could pay to hyphenate later in life.
I’m sure sure she doesn’t want a strangers name
I would wait until she is old enough to make the decision. Or if you remarry. My daughter’s father died when she was 2 months old. When she turned 6 my husband adopted her and we changed her last name to his. He is all she has ever known tho. Most kids want the same last name as their parent (mom)
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Don’t take out your resentment in a move that could traumatise the child who will not understand!
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In most states you need his permission to so that.
The most you can do is maybe hyphenate her name without him.
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Change it to your name.
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I would change it. If my SO was walking away from me and my child then I would take it as a new start with just me and her. Leave the past behind. That’s just how I would feel. I agree with others that I think you would need his permission or it’s something if he signs away his right then I think that’s a time you can petition to change it. Good luck. Just do whatever you feel. I really think there’s no right answer.
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I think it’s pretty pointless to do it. Having his last name isn’t harmful to her, you can give her the option to change it when she’s old enough to decide.
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In New Zealand it’s really hard to do that especially if child is already registered under dad’s name… I wish U and your child the best tho
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Get the courts to grant the name change so if you decide to travel you can. In his name you will be stopped at the border of most western countries and seen as a kidnapper. America and australia need a letter with the fathers signature on it to allow travel.
Would’ve never given a child a last name of someone I wasn’t married to in the first place.
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So are you going to push for child support.? Which you should. And you should keep the name she has.
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Unpopular opinion I guess, but yes. You should try to change her name to yours. Why would you keep her name the same when he isn’t involved just for her to decide later if she wants to change it? That’s so bogus to me, honestly. If later she wants his name, she can decide THAT later. I do not understand the people suggesting that.
You petition the courts for a name change, it won’t be quick, especially now, but they will be the deciding factor. You need some sort of proof that he isn’t involved in your daughters life… you need something to built a legitimate case on why you’re asking for the name change. You’ll have to pay to do this also, it’s not free or just a simple document to fill out and send in.
And if you’re already going to these lengths, you should definitely try for child support. However that may open an entire family court case to create a legal parenting plan, the name change might also.
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Growing up, my dad was never around, but my mom and her parents were. I have always wanted to change my last name to my mother’s maiden name. Do it.
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Something similar happened with my oldest. I wanted too long and my daughter asked me to change her last name. So yes absolutely. Depending on where you are it’s easier if he agrees to it. Call a lawyer sit down and chat. See what your options are
Maybe wait and ask her when she’s older?
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how old are your daughters to me that is the real question. if they are old enough that they are now used to their last names maybe see their point of view of the difficulties they may encounter if they are under school age then by all means change the name if that is what you feel is right. dont do it for vengeance or to hurt this man.
Bitter, bitter, bitter women here. Let the child decide when she gets older
You have to hire an attorney and the dad has to agree.
He may not be in her life
But he is still the dad
Wait until she is old enough to decide for herself
My daughter and her kids dad have never been married
And have his surname
Even though they are no longer togeather