So I added my kids grandma on my fb so she has a way to communicate with my kids and 2 weeks has past and she hasn’t reached out to my kids so I want to delete her. So am I wrong if I delete her? She hasn’t talked to my kids in almost a year and my kids SD is choosing not to be in the life because his gf doesn’t want him to be. I was trying to be nice because I changed my number because it was a lot of drama with their whole side of the family. So when she sent the friend request I thought she wanted to finally make an effort even though she is never consistent.
Maybe she’s not ready to take the first leap. Keep her let her see pictures of your baby.
I had similar situation. I deleted those who just added me to keep an eye on my life.
She probably just wants to see posts of your kids. I don’t see anything wrong with it as long as there’s no drama
Both of my kids dads families dont have much to do with them( both of my girls dads have passed away)… And my theory is, It is not your job to make sure that they are active in your kids lives, that is their job…So if she or any of them choose not to it’s their loss, I would delete and block…
Communication is a two way street. I don’t mean begging her to get involved but why can’t you simply send the first message?
Communication goes both ways.
But if there is no drama, why is it an issue to just let her see the posts
Post a picture of the kids and tag her
See it opens up communication.
Talk to her first. She may assume because you changed your number that you dont want them to contact you. But you are allowing her to see the kids on your timeline. She may also not know how to approach it and doesnt want to upset you.
This is a joke right ? Maybe she wanted to be on fb just to see photos not to talk to them that’s what’s phones are for get over yourself
It’s Facebook if you want to talk to her you can reach out. She probably just wants to see pics of the kids. Send her a message. Or better yet… call her?
If you already knew she was inconsistent you knew that she wouldn’t reach out right away. You don’t have to have anyone that you do not want to on your social media. If it’s about keeping their family updated my suggestion would be to create a separate page and add those people their. That page can be strictly about the kids.
Some ppl go on fb just to look. They dont even know how to use fb… Just scroll and look.
The phone goes both ways. Try and reach out. If she’s reluctant then you know the truth. You can’t expect EVERYONE to wanna see your kids. Sounds crappy but it happens. You do you and be a good momma. Sometimes family isn’t all what it’s said to bs
I’ve added people and never get a message or a like from them. Don’t take it personal. That’s just how Facebook is.
Lmfao it’s been 3 years since my sons grandmother has even tried to say Hi … but there’s always an abundance of pictures of all the other grandchildren… I dont even bother lol neither do the kids anymore they don’t and haven’t asked about that side of family for about 2 years now
FB is a way for many to still connect to those that are distant. She may be just looking through photos. She may be nervous about reaching out.
Giving her a gentle nudge or even “permission” that she can use the messenger to speak with the kids or even you may be needed.
Give her time. She probably don’t know how to approach you yet. Mama it’s hard on us Grandma’s, We don’t want to say or do anything wrong. Maybe reach out to her and start up a conversation. If I was her and you did that to me, that would lift a huge weight off my shoulders. Please don’t block her. Too many females cut the other side of the family out. I know, I’m on that side. I’d give anything to meet my grandson. I’m literally in tears writing this to you…
Im sure she enjoys seeing pictures and updates on them. I would just let it be if she isnt causing any drama
Maybe she’s just interested in knowing whats going on instead of asking
I wouldn’t have added her honestly you can’t consistently be in my kids lives why do you need to be updated about them or see pics of them? Don’t force relationships that should already come naturally.
If you changed your number to avoid drama then you were also kinda blocking them out it seems like. She might not wanna cross the boundaries that you’ve made yourself. I think that you should reach out since you seem to be the one with such high expectations from people. It wouldn’t hurt anything.
Kinda sounds like you anwer your own qestion if she what’s too be involved she would be mabye she just doesn’t know how to or is embarrassed Because it’s been so long and doesn’t know how too start the conversation
First of all she made an effort when she sent the friend request. She took the first step. I’m sure it wasn’t easy. Secondly do you contact everyone of your friends consistently in 2 weeks? Give her some time. Maybe she has limited access to it, maybe she’s nervous to talk to you because of all of the aforementioned drama, maybe she doesn’t know wtf she’s doing on here. Have you tried talking to her at all? Or did you just click accept and expect to be flooded with comments etc from grandma? As long as she isn’t stirring up drama or anything like that just leave it and give her time. I’m sure you have other friends on your list who never interact with your page.
Start small. Tag her in some pics. Like some of hers. Maybe a friendly comment here or there. Reach out to her. If your doing it for the kids then do it for them completely with no deadlines
Sounds like your causing more drama. Not everyone has to respond to your posts lol
When my daughter started hurting is when I stopped trying. No contact since one year ago yesterday. I will not allow my children to hurt. If she is consistently in and out and there is no relationship than ALWAYS do what is best for your children. Family isn’t always blood.
Sometimes that drama is hard on extended family and they dont know exactly how to reach out.
I don’t have 90 percent of my family on social media. We took in my sister’s kids and rescued them from a horrible situation. We are the devil to some family. The kids mother and fathers do not contact my kids…their choice. They will contact me about coming to see them and I did tell the kids at first and then their birth parent would not show and break their hearts. Sometimes people are out of the picture for a reason. We have enough negativity in the world and I’m not trying to disappoint these kids over and over. Even the grandmother on the father’s side will ask everyone else about the kids and tell them I won’t let them see them. Which none is true. I’m totally down for visits but you are not taking the kids anywhere with you because you are a stranger to them.
This happens I have not talked to one my daughter’s for years now last time I did her husband cut the whole family of and no phone calls he changed all phone no cause of someone he did not like who asked me to marry him .Then that man left me to help me reconnect but they Neaver did so lost both ways it’s bad but I daughter must of agreed so nothing I can do .I even opened a private site as well
Honestly same situation where I see she has other grandchildren over all the time. I dont say a thing to her it’s her choice I have extended olive branches several times. The best advice is just accept this is how she is it will Seriously help you dont expect her to be someone she isnt… dont go out of your way either because it usually causes stress. Just keep it civil some people are flakey like that. If you want to delete her then go for it but if your doing it to get a rise out of her dont expect one she could probably careless its honestly just fb… worry about your life and happiness.
Yeah goodluck. I got my kids grandma added and she never asks about them or puts in any effort on seeing my kids lol. Dont even share their pictures like she does her other grand kids
I’d let it be. Is it really hurting you?
Let the woman be your silent friend, she’s there to look at pics of the kids.
Maybe she’s like my parents who are hardly ever on FB even though they have a profile maybe. Many people hardly ever log in or even use the app at all.
I would just wait and see what happens. Many people I know would rather speak on the phone instead of social media.
Petty much? Unless she causes drama on fb just leave her on your friends list.
My biological father never wanted anything to do with us. I dont let him my life its kids life now many reasons. But i do have that side of the family on. They like to see pictures of my kids if I post them.
Holy crap give her a chance he probably doesn’t even know how to use it yet how far along send her things letting her know and just showing her
I unfriend people who I haven’t spoken to in at least a year.
Nah I deleted my sons fathers whole family except the grandparents
Have the time that family adds me on Facebook, they’re just being nosey. Delete her and see how long it takes her to say something.
I don’t keep people on Facebook unless I talk to them often. I don’t put up with fake online relationships. I also don’t have any of my husbands family on here because of drama and bull crap. If it costs you your piece of mind count her out.
I dont see a reason to delete her. Unless you plan to make dramatic posts about her
Which would be very childish.
What harm is there in her seeing the kids photos?
Now if shes causing drama bc of things you post then maybe ya.
Is she hurting anything by being on your Facebook friends list? If not then I dont understand why it matters. Leave it be. If she reaches out so be it…if she doesnt… so be it
That’s your decision, just know it is not in any way up to you to keep up with any form of contact from that side of the family. They want to be involved or know anything they can reach out…It took me a long time and many trips across state before realizing that…If there’s no drama and shes not reaching out its up to you but as others have said maybe she’s not sure how fb/messaging works yet? If you do chose to delete her by all means don’t feel guilty it’s your facebook and your choice who you have as friends. There is always the choice to not be friends on fb but keep her on messenger also incase she does decide to reach out. My son’s dad is on my fb but hasnt asked about him in years or seen him since he was 18ish months. His sister added me and met him once then deleted me. How I see it is if they dont reach out they’re missing out not the child.
I dont even have my own mom on my facebook. So I would say take her off. You can send her pictures without being her friend.
Two weeks? My daughter’s grandmother and aunt are on my Facebook and rarely actually communicate but they still do. Why does it bug you so much?
You said MY LIFE. Then asked a question with your kids and their grandmother in it. Who is it really about?? I’d leave it unless and until she makes it a problem for the children. It’s not the kids fault if they do not get along. Maybe she’s trying to avoid drama herself and is just trying to see them and happy to see pics of them.
She isn’t causing drama so what’s the problem? Mayne she isn’t on much or just enjoys seeing the pictures. Leave it alone.
She sent you a friend request, that’s a step. Were you really giving her a certain amount of time to reach out to you thru a Facebook message? That’s childish, she isn’t hurting anything. Why don’t YOU reach out to her?
Send like she’s trying to be nosey
I think she’s being nosy and then spreading all of your Facebook messages for the rest of their family good way to keep for the ex-husband to keep an eye on you
This person might be the type that doesn’t React/Comment or Message. But did Request YOU. When ever u post about her Grandchildren, tag her in the comments. U don’t have to reply back to her.
leave it for a while then decide. she might enjoy staying connected in ways you arent aware of like looking at the kids photos/activities
I say message her. Let her know you are trying to have someone in your kids lives that want to be consistent with them. Maybe you could get her number, have the kids call her. See if she answers. You could message her with kid photos, updates, etc. The kids do deserve their family. Which includes her. Maybe she doesn’t know what to do. Her son is with someone else, and you have her grandbabies. Definitely reach out. Let her know if she wants to be in their lives, then she can message, call, etc. Nothing’s perfect. Communication goes both ways. Good luck to you. It’s tough.
It won’t hurt nothing !
I’m one of those people who don’t communicate &/or “like” regularly via FB. Just not my thing and thankfully my family and friends haven’t been offended and deleted my ass too. Lol
Some people don’t take FB as serious as other’s. Perhaps instead of relying on FB to bridge the communication barrier, maybe you should pick up the phone and reach out; after all you were the one who cut off communication by changing your number.
Why delete maybe she likes to see the photos but not write because it causes drama like this she is still grandma and it’s up to the kids if they want to keep in contact …
If it’s only been 2 weeks don’t sweat it, not everyone loves on FB and as long as she isn’t starting any drama in your FB then where’s the harm of just leaving it alone. If she ever needs to contact you then this is a good way of doing
Personally, I have my son’s extended family on my Facebook. We litteraly do not talk at all, but they get to see pic of the kids when i post pictures of them. They never comment on the pics but sometimes they like or heart the pictures.
Maybe she’s not on Facebook much? Maybe your stuff doesn’t show up in her feed? My goodness! Go to her page and start engaging on there a little bit. I wouldn’t block her or unfriend her. Be patient!
What does their dad and his GF have to do with any of this?
Also it sounds like she may miss them but is watching from afar to avoid drama with you, her son, and their family
Unless she’s being rude or something on FB leave her on there maybe she will eventually.
My own mother is like this. We hardly speak and agree even less but she can see my kids grow and what they accomplish. Why delete someone who loves your kids? Let the grandma look at the grandbabies and if you care to communicate reach out to her. Why would she reach out if it’s all drama. If you want to end all the drama let her know she is welcome to have a relationship with her grandbabies being as involved as she’d like
You don’t have to be friends in fb to message each other.
And how old (YOUNG) are you that you even care and are considering deleting her?!!?!
Facebook isn’t real
You can ‘unfriend’ she just won’t see your posts then. She can still write you though. And you can write her. Not a problem. Maybe she wanted to be ‘friends’ to see what is going on with the kids. Hard to tell since it has been a year since did before. Maybe write her first and see what happens? No response then ‘unfriend’.
Facebook isnt the only form of communication that exists.
Your Facebook account is not direct contact with your kids and it is public. You might reach out to her because she may still be uncertain how to approach you and the kids. FaceTime is a much better way for her to communicate directly with your kids out of the public eye. Please be patient, it sounds like you could use support and the more people that love your kids and have something good to contribute to their lives the healthier they will grow up.
Maybe she wants to just see pics and stuff about how thier life is going, by way of your posts. She might not want drama either.
Please don’t delete her. I am a grandma but I don’t use the computer a lot so I only see my granddaughter on Facebook occasionally. I know some people are on it daily. She might be looking at the pictures but not commenting.
Grandparent are not away using technology, they are use to communicating on the phone or in person. Some people are not use to this. Ask her if she is comfortable for you to use Facebook to keep her informed on her grand babies. She may think the same as you. It’s best to talk with her to let her know you are busy and this is the only way to keep everyone included at once. I took it personally when my niece had a baby and I didn’t know. She assumed I was aware on Facebook. She felt really bad. Communication can be misleading to most of our problems now a days.
Delete her. And. Block her… I went thru this with my mother in law. She lives next door and will not even wave to my kids. But she wants to be friends on fb
Ok. Fine. I added her. And of course she just used her fb to start drama. Posting memes that were clearly meant for me to see. If there is drama before fb there will be drama if you delete her or keep her. It’s just a matter of time. I feel fb is a way to stay connected to people that I want to share my life with. I’m not begging anyone to be in my kids life. And that means u do not get to window shop at my life on fb.
She just wants to stalk your page. Find out info and talk about you to family.
Talk to her (even if it’s via messenger) and find out what her purpose is for the request. Let her know that she is allowed to contact the children that way, if she is causing no drama and leaving you alone, and it is hurting nothing than I would leave her on the friends list
What about WhatsApp more private and free I do this with my daughter and her family on Dubai you can even record a message
Sounds to me like you need to grow up. The most important issue is whether she is a good influence for your children. They need love and support from family members. Limit their exposure but don’t punish them for something they have no control over. Keep the peace on your part and just detach with love only when necessary. Your children deserve so much.
That sounds kind of petty. You can snooze her and you can also block her from individual post which I block a lot of people from all my post but they see it as we’re still friends. That way there’s no drama. when I do have to have any kind of interaction with them, they don’t feel weird I don’t feel weird. And Life goes on.
No, don’t delete her. Maybe reach out since she friend requested you and encourage her to keep in touch. Maybe she’s not sure. Deleting her without even approaching her us not fair at all
Try facetiming her so that she can see the kids I know I LOVE doing that with my grandbabies
Here’s a crazy idea, have a 1:1 convo with her about this topic. Ya know, like ppl did in the old days!
Why you dont start say hello, maybe she is confuse that you added her but never say hello.
Try to say hello first and she what happen then you can decide what to do after that.
Unless she causes a problem, and since it doesn’t cost anything to have her as a friend, I don’t think I would delete her.
You might block others who DO cause all the drama.
You also might get in touch with Grandma and encourage her to continue her relationship with your children through Facebook.
Sounds like she’s just hanging around for information you might post. I would delete her personally.
They’re is a take a break option id mark limit seeing her and limit her seeing you, then it looks to her like your still friends, and you don’t see the drama
I Wouldn’t. She hadn’t done anything wrong
Maybe she isn’t that much into facebook. Give her a change.
What’s with all the dumb common sense questions you keep posting?
SD isn’t that step dad?? Why would you care about his mother if hes not their dad anyway?
Does she get on Fb often? Maybe she just hasn’t been on since the request
Try talking to her. Maybe this is not really her FB but someone else starting a fb in her name to be nosey
She probably just wants to see what information she can get from you. Been here done that! & I deleted her! Blocked! You don’t want Inconsistent people in your kids lives anyway!
Maybe she just wants to silently admire your beautiful children and not meddle
I had my ex’s sister on my friends list, so she could keep communication/contact with her niece and baby nephew…up until she laughed at a pic of my mom helping my dad drink from a cup as he laid in a hospital bed battling cancer. Later at about 1am she abruptly came over, revving up her car and knocking on our door, wanting to come in. My mom then called her in for unwanted person, having the sheriff catching up to her, and she told him that she needed a place to stay… Shortly after that, she was arrested for dui and child endangerment.
Maybe shes waiting for you to make the first move. Invite her for lunch or something. Kids need their grandma’s. If you reach out and she still doesn’t give effort then I would just leave her as a friwnd as long as she is not bothering you. Life is too short to hold grudges. Good luck
My exes family sends me requests over and over. I delete them and don’t accept them and they resend them. They don’t reach out to know about their nieces and nephews but only to see what I’m doing and go back and gossip about it back and forth so I just don’t accept the request or delete it just let it sit there until they decide to delete it or whatever. Lol. It’s not worth it. Just enjoy your family and be happy. Don’t worry about it and delete her if you feel like it.
My kid’s grandma is my friend on Facebook, but I know she’s a busy woman, and not up to par with how to navigate social media. Therefore I don’t expect her to “like” the photos I post all the time, or comment, or even reach out. She’s a good woman, and I know she loves her grandkids. That’s all that matters to me.
I have gotten friend request from people who never sent it.vise versa.sometimes I think it is face book doing it.so maybe she did not even request
You have to ask then you know the answer
She made the first move by adding,now it’s your move to see what she wants, drama queen.
Just curious what does sd mean
Could it be that she just hasnt been on? My grandma does that time to time. Shoot people think my significant other is mad at them and doesnt care when he doesnt respond to anything on facebook. Dude works 80 hours a week.
Im in the process of deleting family and ita not easy because in turn itll start a new war. But they want me to clarify everything i post, share, etc.
Did she send the request just to be nosy? She’s had time to send message. I’d delete her.