Should I have to pay my mom back if she gives me money?

People with the ability to loan money does not mean she has money to give away. It means she budgets better than you. You both work, right? Things are tight for most people but coffee shops, tattoo places, hair salons, etc. are doing great… hmm makes me curious what you are spending money on.

We’re all working for our money. If you borrow the right thing to do is pay it back

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I always intend on paying it back but everytime my mom tells me to shut up lol I would never ask for something and expect that I just get to have it tho.

If you borrow money ,that means pay them back.If it’s a gift from her ,you don’t have to pay back.

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I’d feel bad if I borrow money from my parents and not give it back… They also have bills to pay and could’ve spent the money they gave me on something else so yeah…

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Everytime I have had to ask my mom for help I pay her back…but now she puts money in my car or purse all the time and I will just randomly find it…:blush:that is different and not expected to be paid back…thats love money…lol I love my mom!!

When you take money from her it should be stated at that time if it is a gift or borrow, If it’s a borrow you are obligated to pay it back. Your mother shouldn’t have to bankroll your lifestyle, hot are an adult. A y like one.

Mom doesn’t stand for made of money (even if she has plenty) and you are an adult. Pay your dang mom back. You aren’t financially her responsibility. And neither is your husband. Or even your kids for that matter.

I would never borrow something from my parents and just expect to keep it. Unless they said don’t worry about it I would always return what I borrow

Even if it’s a little by little you should pay her back

She is helping out of the goodness of her heart. Regardless if she has the money or not to give you, you should offer to pay her back, even if it’s a little here and there that you give her.
It’s a matter of being courteous.

I always pay it back. My mother is the type to hold it over my head but fully supports my sibling who is 49 and wont hold a job or do for himself

Always plan to pay back. If they refuse then that’s kind of them but never expect it to be freely given.

My mom has helped us multiple times . We have always offered to pay back but she never takes it .

I am a mom to adult children and I don’t mind helping out once in a while, but I am not a bank and I didn’t choose their lifestyle so its not my responsibility to fund them. Not to mention, I want them to be able to figure out their issues on their own as I won’t always be around to save them. Parents who enable their kids are not helping them they’re setting them up for continued failure.

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I would never assume it was anything other than a loan. Whether it’s from family or a company, you borrow money…you pay it back

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If you cant pay it back then do something that will Help your mom out. But be sure to discuss it with her first. If she needs the money back then by all means pay it back.

My mom and dad both would expect me to pay them back if I borrowed money… unless it was gifted. I wouldn’t even think about not paying them back.

They litterally bought me new tires because I desperately needed them but couldn’t afford them. And I’m making payments on them right now.

Pay her back. Even if she didn’t want me to pay her back I would do it in some way. To expect that you shouldn’t have to pay her back and you’re upset about it says what kind of person you are.

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Pay her back until she tells u to keep the money she also needs to survive

This is complex question because everyones’ relationship dynamics are not the same. But if I had to borrow money, I’d absolutely pay it back. I’m not entitled to anyone else’s hard- earned money, and I hate letting anyone have something to hold over my head. Remember, your mom is doing well because, in theory, she no longer has you draining her bank acct. :joy::woman_shrugging:

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The entitlement is real. Of course you pay people back tf. I hope your mom puts her foot down and tells you no.

Of course I would… either there needs to be a lifestyle spending change in the ADULT CHILDS LIFE or a second job is needed. Momma has to work for her money, they should too. I don’t believe adults should still live off their parents, especially once they start having their own children. That’s all controllable and you shouldn’t have children until you are stable.

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Pay it back , especially if you know you may need help again later … it’s like having good credit !

It doesn’t matter who you borrow money from. You pay it back.

I am a single mum I work and I get by on what I earn and yeah if I need help my mum will help me out but I always pay her back out of curtesy. I think you both need to learn how to budget a lot better

Yes 100% pay back, your an adult… you have own money ect not your mams responsibility. Spoilt strings to mind

I always pay my mom back when she gives me money. I’m an adult that shouldn’t even be asking for money to begin with, but when my mother helps me when money is tight, I always pay her back

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You should atleast try. Or work of the debt in other ways, that’s what I do when not financially able to pay it back. Most people are struggling right now and parents will generally give what they can, even if it puts them in a bad spot. But sometimes they are doing it even when not able to and they end up with 3 mortgages on their house bc they were helping their grown kids so much.
And you yourself are grown, so technically it’s not their responsibility to give you gas or food money. I dont think many people realize how much they kept continuously asking their own parents for, as grown adults themselves, and how bad it strapped their very older parents.
work of your debts

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I would definitely pay her back . Most times she would say don’t worry about it . Mom or not if I borrow money or ask for money I pay it back .

Find a way to make more money don’t think just because your mom can afford to give you money she should .

My kids don’t ask me for money because I’m broke :sweat_smile: if my daughter gives me money I pay her back

Yes you have to pay her back.you asked for a loan,just like if you got a bank or on credit cards you owe it.Pay your mom back no if ands of buts about it.Helping is a total different than borrowing. Pay her back period.

You absolutely pay it back. It is no longer her job to raise you - ypu’re an adult. And althought it doesnt hurt to help its her money and you should find a way to pay her back as soon as you can.

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That’s ridiculous that you wonder if you should pay her back. Of course you should on principle alone. If you borrow money, you pay it back. In all likelihood, when you offer her the money back she would probably tell you to keep it, at which point you’re off the hook. You have to at least make an effort to offer it back.

Yes most definitely pay her back, times are tough right now but you needed the money and she gave it to you then you need to pay her back.

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My mom has helped and lent me money…usually if it is more then $100 she will want me to pay it back. But if it’s under that she usually doesn’t unless I said I’d pay her back for it. She doesn’t push me into paying it right way. Especially the last few years bc my bf was the only one working. But you should never just expect money is a gift unless it has been stated otherwise.

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I always pay my mom back, always have. Just because she has it doesn’t require her to give it to me. That’s the definition of borrowing. You lay it back!! Now if you go to pay her back and she says… don’t worry about it, then that’s fine. If she doesn’t though, that’s her money.

You asked for it so yes, you wil be expected to pay it back

Look if parents can give great but they aren’t banks they have bills too Every parent wants best for their children but also they have to learn to stand on their own two feet as we’re not gonna be here forever Also with you struggle it makes you stronger and wiser Youth of today want too much to fast without wanting to earn it if you earn it you respect it more

Yes you’re grown ups now and you should definitely offer to pay it back- she’ll have bills to pay too. Even if you pay a bit at a time. If you borrow you should return.

I’ve always paid her back even if it was a little at a time. I would start keeping track of what she’s given and start to pay her back little by little when you can.

Always pay back with interest.

It depends on what the deal was. If the mother said that she is expecting it back, then absolutely pay it back. I understand that people are struggling but it’s not the mothers job to provide for her adult children.

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If Mom offers without prompting it’s a gift. If you ask for it, it’s a loan and needs repaid whether she “has the money” or not. You’re grown and not her financial responsibility any longer. Get a second job, adjust spending to make sure needs can be met before ANY extras are gotten. Situations happen and help is sometimes needed but to expect that help to be a gift just because the giver has the money is rude and selfish. There will come a time the giver may need that extra money for personal/medical care.

You should ALWAYS offer and be prepared to pay her back. If she says no that is something different. No one owes you anything. You are an adult with responsibilities that YOU created, NOT her.

If you ask for a loan, you need to pay it back. Also do it when you say you will. If someone asks for a helping hand, not a loan, then a person should not expect to be repaid. But the responsible thing would be to repay it or at least don’t come back for more. I know how hard it can get. People have to understand most people work hard for what they have and should not be expected to just give it away.

Always pay my mum back. She was kind enough to help me get nappies and wipes and milk when I needed, of course she’s getting it back

As a mom n grandma I will always “help” my family BUT I’ve taught them better n that helping them isn’t my responsibility n they try to payback due to that raising.
They might struggle n can’t pay back a lump sum but them giving up $7 coffee or going out to eat is at least $7 of a payback… Its called respect n taking responsibility for yourself n family.
I’m sorry to say, but your husband n you sound like you lack those skills n expect others to bail you out… No food- go to food bank… No gas- ride bus, walk, or get a bicycle… Stop taking her “help” for granted n try being a responsible adult…

Are you borrowing or just telling her and she gives to you.

Girl pay your mama back smh

I always pay my mom back but that’s how our family works. If one of us has it then noone goes without but it goes the same both ways

Wow, you sound very entitled. I ask my mum for help all the time. And everytime she has helped, I have paid her back. Struggling or not. It’s part of borrowing. Grow up.

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Was it a gift or a loan? If you asked for it pay it back!

I think you should pay her back if you ask for the money. Just because she has it when you need it doesn’t mean that you’re entitled to her money. She already spent her time, effort and money raising you to adulthood and you are an adult.

You’re a grown ass woman. Pay your mama back!

Why wouldn’t you pay her back? She honestly didn’t have to give you anything. Just like you work hard for your money, she works/worked hard for hers. Money doesn’t grow off trees around here that easily.

Absolutely! First off…you are an ADULT. It is not her responsibility to help provide for you or your family. Cut expenses any way you can. Second of all, if you can’t afford to pay her back, work it off. I am sure your mother has to work for her money, so why wouldn’t you have to work for or the pay for what you get from her?

Don’t count other peoples money. I’d never assume anyone had enough money to pay my way.

My momma would tell me to stop living beyond my means or get a second job. Lol

I always pay my mom back.
There are times she don’t accept it. There are times she sees me trying but struggling and gives me money and tells me it’s a gift. But if I borrow I pay back.

My mother helped me out many times, and I always had the intention of paying her back. Most times it didn’t happen and she did not expect it. I am doing the same with my children…

None of this matters. Please be grateful she is still here. Because when she’s not, petty stuff like this will mean nothing.

I owe my dad probably a million dollars lol I guess it just depends on the parents mindset…I couldn’t see myself asking for my child to repay me …

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I’m grown just because she can doesn’t mean she has to
Always give back or the answer may be no next time

Yes, you should pay her back.

I don’t assume my mom is an ATM and owes me money. If I’m in a tight spot and have to ask for help, I already have a plan on how I’m paying her back. Even if it’s $20 for gas.

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Yes you have to pay her back, your a grown woman, your mama dosent have to support you anymore

Yes a random $20 I wouldn’t expect repayment. But for a substantial or continuous loaning of money I would. Now it doesn’t have to be in the form of cash. It could be help with lawn care or odd job. Help with car a maintenance.

Personally I’d offer to go over their budgeting with them and brainstorm ways to bring in extra cash. Sometimes it can be hard for people to look at their budget and really decide if something is a want or need. And always have family sign a loan contract with terms of repayment including any extra charges and an end date.

This is so entitled.

I always offer.

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Uhhhh yeah if my parents loaned me money I’m going to pay them back. Even if they tell me don’t worry bout it. They don’t have to give me any money. They served their time spending their money on me growing up.

Depends on the relationship you have with your mother and if it was money loaned or gifted . Just because your parents have money doesn’t mean that they have to give it to you you are in fact a grown-up

You are an adult… yes pay her back

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You sound quite entitled. Of course you pay people back. Unless it’s given to you as a gift, it’s a loan. If you’re already struggling, try not to borrow so much :woman_shrugging:

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Entitled attitude! Smh

You and your husband need to get better jobs or budget better.

Oh and, stop having kids you can’t afford!

Would I expect the money back?

No because I never do but, yours might.

GROW UP KID!

Yes, you need to pay her back unless she has said the words do not bother to pay me back. Borrowing is a loan, not an obligation for the person with money to just give it away whenever.

Don’t assume someone has the money to give away. She may also be struggling but not sharing that information with you. If you borrow, you pay back unless told otherwise by the person lending the money.

My mom would never expect it back, but I would never NOT pay it back.
Be grateful for the help, but don’t abuse it

Bwaahaaa, my mom would let us starve, sorry but blood doesn’t mean family and family doesn’t mean blood. With my brothers, yes all 3 of them, she’d do it no questions asked, but not me. Struggle on your own and you can make it. Figure it out.

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If I ask for help, I pay it back!
If they hand it back to me or refuses to take it, then I won’t fight.
You shouldn’t expect someone to help you and not pay them back because they have money, that is their money.

I would for sure expect to pay it back!!!

With interest, with that additud

You absolutely pay her back. You’re an adult you need to start acting like one. Now, as a mom when I give my family money I don’t expect it back but am hopeful they do pay it back. My husband always says think you’re never getting it back so it’s a surprise when I do.

If I felt the need to ask anyone for money, I’d already have a plan to pay them back prepared.

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You should pay her back as and when you can

You sound very entitled, your momma doesn’t owe you Jack and go6t you to assume that you shouldn’t have to pay it back, makes and ass outta u and me (assume):roll_eyes:

my mom let me borrow money all the time and as soon as my check cleared it went right back in to her account .

I’d have to ask myself if I’m affording cigs, entertainment, internet, cable, x box, drinks other than water juice etc—- if I should even ask my parents for money. And even at that- I always pay back anyone I’ve borrowed from. Are your parents watching you waste money on things other than essentials? If yes, you shouldn’t be borrowing. I know people that get a tattoo before putting gas in the car or food in their stomachs and want others to support their lifestyle

Lmao yea I’d hope my mom would help and if she could afford to I know she would but when you are better off again it would be nice to return the favor…it’s your mom she’s done enough for you in your life…sounds like you just like to take advantage and the fact you use you and her grandkids over her head just shows you are shitty. Instead of holding it over HER, why don’t you do a better job an be a mother so YOUR kids don’t go hungry and you don’t go without gas :woman_shrugging:t3:

Why do you expect your mom to pay your bills? If you borrow money, pay it back

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I wldnt dare take my mom’s $. I’ve been giving my mom $ since I started working. I want her to keep her $ enjoy it. I’m younger I can work multiple jobs and let my mom relax and I absolutely loved it. We get together send her on vacation. It’s a privilege to give my mom anything I’d never take

It’s depends on your relationship with them. If your asking then I’d say offer to pay them back and they can say yes or no

Respectfully, it sounds like you should ask her to babysit instead so you can go to work & get your bills figured out (&under control)

I used to have to borrow money from my parents. We always made small payments and then at tax time we paid them back.

WTH are you seriously, if you asked for it pay it back. She didn’t get it for free c’mmon now daughter, sister, mom anything pay her back. When have you seen people giving people money for free? That’s what husband is for.

You should expect to pay her back. You can’t force her to gift you money.

I always pay my mom back when she has lent me money. It’s the right thing to do. Family or not

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Yes, you should pay anybody backs unless they say you don’t have to. You’re grown she has did her job to and raise you and probably do for your the grandkids. That was your choice to have the family so you and the hubby need to do the best you can without thinking you can ask and no have to pay it back, if so start letting him ask his relatives and see what they say

I don’t ask money from my parents but if we’re shopping or something and I forget my wallet in the car and she pays I pay her back.i think you should always go to pay the person back to show you appreciate them lending you money. If they don’t want to accept it at least you tried.

I could never— Im sorry but your a grown adult. Learn to budget better, but don’t expect money from you mom just because she can… if she wants too it’s different. But a grown adult just taking her money because you struggling and she has the means too… hard pass. Shes earned that money. If you need to borrow, pay her back. Im sure she will never say No because of her grandkids… I mean idk just my thoughts.:woman_shrugging:

I am in my 50’s. 15 years ago I had to borrow $500 from my mom, to pay my.car payment. I had 4 kids, married and both working, struggling but usually managed. But my husband had nor worked for 2 weeks due to mechanical issues with his work truck, thus no pay. Anyway, she told me don’t worry about it, just get caught up on everything. So I accepted it as a gift (she is not rich, but could easily afford to help - never had before without repayment. Anyway, 15 years later I found out that she is complaining to mutual friends that I never “paid” her back. My mom has always kept track of every penny she has loaned her kids, and made sure we pay her back. I was and offended that she is holding this over my head to this day. I feel like sending her a check for $500 with paid in full marked on it, but friends tell me to ignore it and just let her continue being the narcissist she is. She even has life insurance on me, my younger sister and brother. My oldest sister passed away 2 years ago and she didn’t even give a penny towards the funeral even though she got the life insurance pay out on her. If I were you, I would try to pay her back, even if it’s only $20 a week. If you do, then she will always help you when you need it.

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This is very much a case of entitlement. Unless it was given as a gift, it should be paid back. It’s also not your mothers fault for your struggles, it’s not her responsibility to help you financially, especially as an adult.