I know a few boys who did this during their teenage years. They had rules at moms house and did not have as many at dad’s house. If he is in his teenage years, let him try it, he will probably be back pretty soon.
Let him go you didn’t make your son on your own he needs his father too.
Aww i have no advice.But im sending hugs and prayers up for you.
Sit down with him. Let him know exactly what he may be missing out. No friends, no sports, etc. Ask him his goals… what does he really want ??
The same happened to me he was going he did so good for this father better in school had chore s. Later he came back to me wanted me on holiday s
Let him do it. If he hates it he can come home and if he likes it then he stays… it may not be what you wanna do and it sounds like you’ll have a harder time than your son will. Don’t let your nature block him from experiencing his dad for himself.
Would you be willing to give up more weekends or more of the summer. Try to get closer to 50/50 with him staying in your school district?
Let him go for the summer & see
Finish out the school year with you and let him move in with dad in the summer. See how that goes. If good, let him stay and see how it goes when school starts. If not, let him come home. I know it’s hard mama but you can do this. He is still your little boy, no matter what.
I’d go in with an open mind about it and let him know you’re going to be there either way. If the answer is no, that is something he may grow resentment towards you for. He may be doing some of his own soul searching and is curious to how life with Dad would be. It doesn’t have to be a permanent thing right away. Talk with your son and see if y’all can talk about a time frame for him to try it out. Taking the permanence away can make it less scary for you, and he will know that if he ever wanted to come back, no questions asked, the door is open. Summer is coming up soon. Maybe that can be a start? I know it’s hard. That’s your baby. But, he’s growing up and becoming his own person with his own wants/needs. You being supportive of his decision either way it goes will keep the relationship strong. You got this!
What does his father say? What are his plans for child care and after school Sports and activities?
My mom has always told me the grass isn’t greener on the other side… I wanted to live with my father for the same reasons and wanted to get to know him more to be able to spend more time with him but it wasn’t always a perfect home either! I would just let him try it out and see how it goes
Help him weigh it all out then let him go on the condition he can always come back <3
I would let him spend more than every other weekend there. Try a summer and I bet he’ll be home with you for the school year. Dad won’t be just the “fun parent” anymore. Bc that’s what he is 4 days a month!
Speaking from experience. I let my son go live with his dad freshmen year when he asked again. I told him he had to stay the entire school year and if he didn’t like it over there when he came for the Summer he could stay home. He flipped back and forth throughout high school. It was fine with us. A boy needs his dad and there are things his dad will be able to teach him than no matter how hard U try U can’t teach.
It worked for us. Ya just have to find common ground. The best interest of the child is always best.
I was a single mom too and my ex wasn’t the best dad as well. You are the mom and dad. You are the one who is strict and says no to things. You are the one who has to reprimand him. So you are the witch…not meaning it in a bad way. Then they go to the dad’s and they can do what they want, eat what they want, go to bed when they want, because the dads feel quilty for not being there the way they should so they allow it, so in your son’s eyes it is cooler to be with his dad than with you. My daughter also told me the one time she want to go live her dad, so I packed her bags and told him come fetch her. It was a Friday night. The next Wednesday she cried she wants to come back home. She saw it wasnt so nice with him, his new wife and her kids when you love their, that was the last of it. The thing is a son needs a role model, a man in their live, try and let your dad, your brother or a best friend try and give the attention he needs. His dad will always be his dad, and kids dont understand things. We dont want to see our kids get hurt but we cant protect them forever.
Why not try adding a few extra days with his Dad. Like an extra weekend or an extra day when possible. Regardless of how he Parents. Kids need both, and kids need stability and they also in the end need those sports and extra curricular activities. It hurts being Mom, the main provider, the one who makes sure their needs are met. Then they want “Dad” bc he’s he’s much more fun. I’ve been working on this one myself. This is what makes us the strong Mothers we are
Let him try for a little while and let him see who dad is when he is with him all the time
Much as it hurts Let him go and see what it’s like …give dad enough rope and he will hang himself xxx
Fuck that, don’t let him go. I promise in the end, he will love you for it. Dont let him go.
I would have him do a trial 6 weeks in the summer and then go from there.
Try over summer first.
I wouldn’t. If your Ex gets his crap together gets caught up on child support and shows he can be a present parent, then the subject can be revisited. Until then keep things as they are. Explain to your child it is not in his best interest at this time for such a dramatic change. If your child keeps on with the crying etc., put your foot down and let him know that the crying needs to stop and is not going to change the outcome of your decision. It is ok to be a strict parent. It’s ok to say no. Giving in because he is crying about something enables bad behavior and shows him that manipulation works…Stick to your guns Mom and follow your intuition. It will never lead you astray.
First how old is your son second I agree with Amy I think 50/50 would be better than letting him go live with his dad if his dad is that undependable and doesn’t care about his games and stuff cuz your little boy would be missing out on so much. I put my daughter first now and everything that I do unfortunately her dad is dead died when she was two she’s now 12, but I make my decisions based off what’s best for my daughter and not what my daughter may want
I would let him try it out over at his dad’s for the summer. See how he feels then. Depending on his age now, he can choose
I think there comes a time in every child’s life that they want to go live with the other parent when parents are not together. If dad is not doing anything sketchy in his life let him go for the summer. Switch rolls, have your son come home every other weekend and see how it goes.
Maybe just start letting him go every weekend and every school break to try it out.
I would let him try over summer vacation see if it works out
Let him get a taste of it… he will be back.
How old is your son? Touch base with a counselor and or a close friend or family member.
My son goes to his dad’s every weekend Friday through Sunday. If I wanna do something with him on a Saturday I just go pick him up we do our adventure and I take him back. I don’t think it’s ever the best idea to let your kids go live with anyone other than you… Not judging if you decide to that’s just how I feel for me and my kids.
Sounds like Dad is irresponsible and shows a lack of caring for his son and being there for him. He doesn’t go to the games, he doesn’t pay his child support… I as the mother would not feel comfortable letting my son to live with someone like this even if it is his Dad. I would be concerned about the lack of interaction on Dad’s end is he going oversee his school grades, assignments? Maybe just add more time in but definitely I would not. Good luck with your decision!
I wouldn’t be OK with my kid switching schools. I would request if he were to move with dad that he find a place in the same school zone. In the meantime let him go over more often. Every other weekend isn’t much.
usually kids wont want to leave their friends or ‘life’.
Your are the responsible mother and you get to make that decision not the child. Summer and school vacation should be what’s best.
Have him wait until the end of the school year and then if he still wants to live with dad let him give it a try he might surprise you and want to move back by the end of summer break