I would wait and see how you feel after all the hormones and you can make the best decisions for yourself and the baby. You can always add him to the birth certificate and file for child support later if you need.
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don’t claim the monstrosity 7 do the best you can for the new arrival.
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In my personal opinion, for him to suggest an abortion to you, means that he doesn’t want anything to do with a child…
In law opinion… He has be present in order to sign the paternity acknowledgment in order to even be on the birth certificate.
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When I was in a similar situation…I didn’t and that would be exactly!!!what I would do again!
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I gave my daughter my last name and her father is not on the birth certificate. Best decision I ever made.
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Just say u don’t know who the father is and move on that’s messed up that he wants to abort if tour child ever found that info out I’m sure it will hurt them
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I had a similar situation. My son is now about to be 8. I didn’t want child support I didn’t want nothing with his name on it. I knew from day 1 he would be nothing but a deadbeat. He wouldn’t even visit him in the nicu for the first 6 weeks of his life knowing he had a 50/50 chance of not surviving. I didn’t put him on the birth certificate i didn’t put his name on anything. There is no legal or paper documents tying him to my son but thats what I wanted. Now I gave his father multiple chances to be there. If he would have stepped up and been a consistent father I would have considered of adding him later. But he proved to me I was right all along. I’m glad I have it the way it is cuz if he wants any kind of visitation he first has to establish paternity and that cost money which I don’t see him doing any of it.
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If he’s not involved in your pregnancy he’s not going to be there when baby is born to sign the bc. You can go after him for child support after baby is born. I wouldn’t though. You & your baby won’t get anything but headaches from someone like that.
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He told you how he felt about the pregnancy let him go and enjoy the new life that is growing inside of you - God blessed you with this child for a reason take care of you and him/her and let the sperm donor go away completely.
He’s probably hiding it from his gf that’s why
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I think you should not put him on the birth certificate cuz if he said he dont want the baby then thats fine but i think u should just enjoy ur pregnancy and ur baby and forget him and just focus on being the best mom possible so ur child wont turn out like him and why give him any credit for all the work ur gonna be putting into ur child if he’s not around trust me u dont need him u can do it all by urself its hard work but worth it at the end. Just speaking from experience and that ended horrible
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Walk away. I’m 12 years in and wish I didn’t put him on it. My daughter goes thru so much and it kills me to watch him be a shitty dad cuz he never wanted to be there in the first place.
He doesn’t want that baby. Why set your child up for that?
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No give baby your last name and leave that man alone he made it clear when he said abort.
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Hunny I’d wipe my hands of him & keep that bundle to yourself!! He’s not worth the heart ache or bullshit if he isint Interested!! Just love that baby as I know u will!! U will be enough!! 
He has to be present to even be put on the birth certificate to sign it. But you can contact the attorney general for him to sign an AOP acknowledging that he is the biological father. They will have him take a paternity test to prove he is the father of he refuses to sign it. But in all honesty why would you want anything from this man who wants you to get rid of HIS OWN CHILD. let him go. I went through this with my oldest daughters dad. And she grew up to be one amazing young lady!
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You’re a complete piece of shit if you deny a parent rights to thier child.
Just walk away. Its all about that baby now. It’s what I had to do. I tried and tried until my son was born to give his bio a chance. He wanted nothing to do with him. Now hes 2 1/2 and being adopted by my husband who was there for us through the entire pregnancy as my best friend. Life keeps moving forward no matter what
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I was in a similar situation with my daughter. when I had her the nurse gave me the best advice. It’s easier to put someone on a birth certificate, then to take someone off it. So I didn’t put him on there, he never once texted or called. I met the man of dreams 9 months after I had my daughter. He has adopted her and it was a breeze to put him on the birth certificate. I didn’t go after child support. In my state if they pay child support that gives the rights to the child. Screw that.
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In Illinois they won’t just let you just put him on there … here he has to show up & sign it to be on it …
He does not need to be on the birth certificate , if he decides to grow the fuck up he can still see the child .
Don’t push him to see the kid but I’d still let his parents know they have a grandchild in the way.
Yes! For child support. Do it for your child.
No adult gets used without permission. It takes two. You should name your baby whatever you like. He should partake in the consequences monetarily. But if you want to alone.
Y’all are some petty baby mamas. He literally made it clear he did not want the baby, so because the woman still wants to keep the baby that means she can try to receive child support? That’s just so low, you already are aware you’re doing it on your own as soon as they suggest an abortion.
He didn’t ‘tell’ you to do it because obviously he can’t.
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You can get Child Support without him on the Birth Certificate~
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Hell no. Don’t put him on BC
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I know a lot of people are saying “walk away” but you deserve that monetary help. It takes TWO to make a baby. If he doesn’t want to be daddy then fine but he still needs to support his child.
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Please put the child first! Please think about this from a child (who grows up) point of view. They may resent you because you didnt allow their dad in their life or even the chance to get to know their dad. I realize dad may not want to be in their life but at least it wasnt you denying who he is or a relationship. Will that hurt the child? yes of course it will. Having a parent who doesnt love you or want anything to do with you is extremely hurtful but just as or more hurtful is no relationship and your mom not trying to foster a relationship with other parent, or hiding it all etc. The child can and most likley will do a dna test at some point to find out who he is whether you tell him/her or not. If you venture into the DNA forums you wil see how many mother daughter/son relationships are destroyed by the mother not allowing the father in thier life or denying who there father even is OR the option of thier father to be thier legal father. Many find it a birthright! It will be a tough decision whichever way you go and there will be many many questions over the years and wonderings, emotional outbursts about who dad is and why dad doesnt love or want me & or why wouldnt you allow me to have a relationship with my dad. All this will be hurtful to the kiddo no matter what you do. You know the man better than we do so think about him and make the choice that will hurt your child the least.
I wish I didn’t put my eldest sons father on the birth certificate, probably my biggest regret. It’s been 4 years since he has seen my son, and it was once in a blue moon he would see him before that too… but now he refuses to sign a passport or anything like that just to be petty. My sons last name is a name that he has no family connected too. I wish my 17 year old self wasn’t so stupid & in love
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Almost the same situation happened to me. I washed my hands with him and took care of her myself completely. She is 4 now and has the most amazing daddy. If I would have forced her sperm donor to take part in her life I seriously doubt it would have benefitted her at all. You have to do what you think is best for your baby.
No. Youre giving him rights to claim a child he doesn’t want and won’t support. Forget him. Give your child your surname
If your child asks questions later in life at least you have a name to help them search
I would however ask him for any medical history that may affect your child
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Have a dna test done. End of story. If he loves you and doesnt care? If he signs the bc its on him
But dna tests are real. No man should have to pay money and child support because of your infidelity. If he loves you? He will but its gonna be hard…
Name on, child support and any inheritance he may get from dad…
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Say father unknown plain and simple
The fact he has suggested an abortion it shows he doesn’t want it.hes happy in his relationship after getting her back.for you i would enjoy your pregnancy make the most of every minute.if in time he wants to be part of the babys life see how you go.but only on your terms.you don’t need to put his name on birth cert at all.if you do he has to be there to sign all rights that he’s the father.honestly give the baby your surname.in time if you meet someone you can change to double barrell.thats what I did.best of luck xxx
Nope don’t do it. With my first child mine cheated on me my entire pregnancy didn’t go to any dr appt. Wasn’t at the hospital when I was in labor or gave birth was all around a shitty guy he was not put on her birth certificate and my daughter has my last name 
and 9 years later and I don’t regret my decision at all very proud of myself for leaving him off of everything. Girl leave him off your child is better without him. Screw child support dont put him on the birth certificate just for that.
What is the point of FORCING someone to be a parent of a child that was the product of a fling? Sounds like you wanted a tax refund. Don’t worry about that dude. Have your kid and move on. If you do involve him legally just so you can get benefits, you’re an asshole. Point blank.
put him on the birth certificate and demand child support. He doesn’t have to acknowledge his child but it was his mistake also.
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I personally would not , will be better for u down the road if legal issues get involved ! I made this mistake and it costed me dearly ! Take it from me !!!
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Child has a right to know this info especially at 18
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His name does not have to be on the birth certificate to get child support.
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Doesn’t have to be on the birth certificate to pay child support. Since he suggested abortion I certainly wouldn’t include him on the birth certificate.
Depending on what state, you’ll need more than that for child support. In NY, you can’t put a name on the birth certificate w/o the father’s consent. For Child support, you need a blood test or dad’s consent.
If you put him on the certificate that means he has rights to that child. So if he decides to be spiteful… things could happen. I personally would not continue a pregnancy with someone like that, but do what’s right for you. I would not put him on the certificate, personally.
I say walk away.
There will be a lot of unnecessary stress and drama if you involve him. The child will suffer the most. Just walk away for happiness and peace.
I would not. Just move on and live and love ur life and make the most for ur baby. Your baby is not a mistake, that baby is a gift and he’s the one missing out. When baby grows up, give them all of the info you have on their father and they are free to choose how to go forward. Be honest, you didn’t want to put that baby in a situation they weren’t wholeheartedly wanted. Praying for you and you got this momma!!! Plus, child support is overrated when ur dealing with an ass, which he clearly is.
He’s a grown ass man that knows the risk of unprotected sex. Put his name on the birth certificate and a DNA test because he’ll probably swear it isn’t his. Go for child support and put the money away for the child if you are financially able to. If he chooses not to be in the child’s life that’s on him.
In California he has to be present and sign a form to be put on the birth certificate at the time the birth clerk does the cert. if there is any question we can’t put him on unless he signs abs states he is the father
Don’t put him on the BC. It gives him rights. Do be honest with your child. You have a “sperm donor”. While you 2 didn’t love each other, he did help with the sperm portion, to give you a child, which you wanted obviously. If you can do it without his monetary support, do so. You will all be happier in the end. Save a few pics of baby daddy, his name last known address ect. For the baby later. Cause baby will want to know. Give baby YOUR name. Baby has you and all your love. Baby doesn’t need anyone else.
No way!!! He doesn’t deserve it. Keep your child with the same name as you!
It will cause more damage to have someone around that obviously doesnt want to be, than to just not have them there at all. He says to get an abortion, he dont plan in being present. I know theres a thing about monetary help, but you can do it on your own without his help. You got this mama!
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No to the birth certificate and hell yes to the child support!
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You still have quite a few months for him to come around. If he continues being that way, don’t put him on. But it’s a shocking thing to get pregnant, unexpectedly for anyone. (I was in the same exact situation as you & got a not so nice/great reaction at first) but he came around fairly quickly & now we’ve been married for almost 10 years & 4 kids. Not excusing what he said AT ALL but just saying, see how it goes over the next 6 months then make your choice.
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Just keep walking on down the road. You have nothing to answer for when your child is older but he will.
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Still the father and the child has every right to know who she is and where she comes from
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As a guys opinion walk away and find a real man…. A real man will take care of your child like it’s his own….
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You can still get child support without him on the birth certificate if you get a paternity test. Not naming him just makes it easier to keep your rights for determining what happens for your child’s life
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Walk away, no child support. He is obviously not ready for that responsibility, he’s just gonna cause you and your child more stress and heartache later on! You got this.
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I wouldn’t unless you need the child support. Its honestly been so much better with my son i didn’t put his father on there then with my x who’s on his boys. My oldest dosen’t care and if anything gets said i just say i have no clue who he is. I’ll eat alittle crap to not have to deal with his sperm donors shit.
I’m Florida unless he signed it within 24 hours they won’t keep him on it
I just went through this with my father and my mom didn’t put his name on my birth certificate. I was 14 when I met him for the first time and we continued a relationship since (I’m now 30) but in late December he passed away and didn’t leave a will or anything with his wishes on it. My brother tried to take everything because he lived with him his entire life and said he needed it more. After consulting with a lawyer and having a conversation with my brother about doing ut the hard way or the easy way he agreed to move forward the easy way. BUT my point is that the company he worked for made me do DNA with my brother to prove I was blood and it was very expensive and took a long time. My mom was very adamant she didn’t want him in my life and so she did it but she still made him pay child support and in the end I just wish she would have done it for my sake. Would have made things a lot easier in my situation. My dad was a good man and though he didn’t step up then we still had a very good relationship before he passed. Every child deserves their parent and to know who they are!
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Can’t add him without dad’s signature.
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My unpopular opinion:
Preface, I’m anti-preborn murder aka abortion.
If women get the option of not being a mother, (like adoption) men should also get the option of not being a father. That includes financial support.
You know he does not want to be a father. You have chosen to be a mother (Excellent and noble choice!) But do not put him on the BC, and do not force him to pay child support. You have both made your decision at this point.
In California when I had my daughter, father had to be present to be put on BC. But because he was locked up, they put “not stated” for father. Which ended up being the best thing anyway. I would not put the father on it of I were you, it will cause so much drama. I have a friend that has her daughters dads name on the BC, but he has never raised her, or seen her and doesn’t want anything to do with her. But because hes on the BC, friend cant take her daughter on vacation put of state unless its a bordering state. Her husband has been the one to raise her etc. He’s going to adopt her, but cant until they can get the fathers rights terminated. She told me that she should’ve never put his name on it. She regrets it now.
This won’t be a popular opinion but I’d suggest not putting them on the birth certificate or child support unless the major things change I honestly and personally when want him to have anything to do with my child. I’d leave him alone maybe reach out one more time later during pregnancy cuz let’s be honest he probably thinks it’s fake right now and if he still doesn’t care then listen to him ***also just want to add that it’s always easier to do those things later on like add him to bc than it is to remove him from it.
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Don’t put your kid through that. He’s a pos and you can find someone who will love you and your kid. Keep the flig dude off the north certificate unless you want child support or something.
Do not put him on there!
I gave my son my last name and sober since his bio dad wasn’t there to sign at the most important time of his life. He can pay to change it, if he ever chooses to.
I would not put his name on the birth certificate, but if he inquires later, do not keep him from the baby, supervised visits only. My daughter left her boyfriend after she found out she was pregnant, he has made very few visits to the baby boy(who has had his 4th birthday) his father is not on the birth certificate. We are friendly with the grandparents from his father’s side, they get pictures and face time with the child, so his father has not been kept from him, but he is not on the birth certificate, so my daughter makes all decisions for her child. No telling what will happen in the future, but this has worked for the last 4 years. We did do a DNA test proving he was the child’s father, picked it up at Walmart, sent it in and paid for the results(like $30 for the kit and I think it was $75 to get the results).
In my situation. I’m leaving his dad off even tho we were in a relationship he left me and got with a prostitute…. I don’t want child support. It’s not worth it for me. Right now I don’t have to worry about him taking him.
If he is not present at the birth you can’t put on the birth certificate.
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No, I wouldn’t put his name on the birth certificate. I also would have him give up his parental rights and raise the child on my own. No child should have to grow up without the bio donor and then one day he decides he wants to waltz into the child’s life and fight for custody. That’s a real thing and it happened to my best friend. Her daughter never met her bio father, when she turned 13, he decided he wanted to be in her life. He fought for custody and won full custody because the mother had been married twice, but only once in her daughters life. Judge ruled mother unfit due to that one thing. Broke up her family and messed up her beautiful daughter. The daughter was not allowed to see her mom so she turned to drugs to cope. It was very sad. The daughter is now 24 and she is drug free, finished school, is engaged, and is pursuing a career. Btw, my friend never received child support from him, but when he got custody, he made sure he received child support from her.
You can if you’d like to. But if he’s not interested I wouldn’t. If he decides to be involved later, how you handle that is up to you.
I whipped my hands clean best decision I ever made
Just walk away and don’t out him on there. I didn’t put my daughter’s dad’s name on the birth certificate which has really worked out in my favor.
Don’t do it. If he wants to make things right later on he will find a way. It’s not your responsibility to maintain the relationship between him and his child.
Wipe them hands clean!
Walk away…especially if he suggested abortion, and you go for child support, some states will give him rights for visits…do you really want your child w a man that you don’t really know and didn’t want anything to do with the child?..and who knows what other women will be around your child…and you will see how he is over the pregnancy…I wouldn’t expect much from him … try not to stress and do what’s best for the child and you…sounds like 18yrs of drama to me…be strong sister
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Yes put him on it …Had a friend went threw this and then the dad past it took years just to get any social sec or life policy money at all … Its he’ll when u leave them off …it still want change anything if you leave him off …
Absolutely not. I’d only do your name
He suggested abort, that tells you how involved he wants to be. He doesn’t, at all! Listen to that. Forget he exists COMPLETELY and move forward in your life with your baby. Do NOT put his name on the birth certificate and don’t ask for child support. If later he decides he wants a relationship with the baby, have paternity determined by the courts so it’s legal and official… then file for child support and work out visitation rights. As of right now though… he’s already told you he has no interest. Forget he exists until he otherwise communicates that to you. That’s what’s in the best interest for you and the baby RIGHT NOW. You can always go through the “what if’s” of what might happen in the future, but make the best decision for you and your baby based off of what’s going on right now. And right now he has no desire, so respect that and most importantly respect yourself and walk away completely!
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Wipe your hands clean
If ur not married u can’t put his name on only he can sign he he suggest u murder the unborn baby cut him out of ur life u can do it without help
Wipe your hands clean! The child support isn’t worth the disappointment you and your sweet baby will go through.
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Birth certificate exists to track bloodlines. Do you want to risk your kid marrying their cousin down the road?
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Well he has to sign papers to put his name on the birth certificate.
Really a decision you must make my dear
Depends where you live regarding name on birth certificate, but most commonly your baby will have to take your surname, don’t keep a man from his child if he should ever reach out, this is a long story short so not all details are involved nor relevant except there’s a life been created and it has the right to know both parents. I hope it works out best possible way for ur baby. Good luck 
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Nope ! You will be an amazing mama 
Give that baby your name!!! He’s clearly not interested and probably never will be! That baby is better off with out him!!
Definitely no and I’m so proud that you said that aborting would not be a answer as he suggested sound likes to me he ain’t a very good person believe me I know I’ve been through the same thing get used but when it comes down to a child that he don’t want already don’t put his name on the birth certificate just leave it blank and definitely don’t give him the last name that would be best for everybody involved would be just to let it go and leave them alone which if I like mistaken you have to have the father there with the ID to sign birth certificates so keep me in an amazing woman you are take care of your bundle of joy wait for the day that he or she arrives he ain’t worth it
I’m quick to say no because my aunt had something similar happen and his wife found out about the baby and forgave her husband but they both wanted to take the baby aka my cousins away from her so … why give that man any rights ? F that .
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Where I live, the father has to be present and show identification to be out on the birth certificate, that’s what happened with my son anyway.
My daughter’s father wasn’t there so he was not put in the BC (I honestly dont remember if they even asked me about the father), he was automatically put on her BC after he insisted on a DNA and she came back as his.
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U don’t have to put his name on birth certificate to claim child support. Paternity test is all u need.
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Put him on the birth certificate. That’s the child’s father. If he doesn’t want anything to do with the child, take him to court. But you definitely want your kid to know who their father is even if they don’t know him.
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I do know though back in 1991 my daughter was born in February of 92 3 days before her birthday of one year her daddy was proved to be the daddy and he had was told he had to go so that’s a papers and get put on the birth certificate and her last name was to change this well he never did it so she went back to my maiden name and that was it
WIPE CLEAN. idc about money. my son probably would have died if i put my baby daddy on his BC !!! don’t do it baby. protect that baby & if later on he wants to see his baby , make him take you to court to prove his seriousness!!!
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Whether you put him or not on the birth certificate…he still will have rights. But it would have to be proven in a court of law with DNA. So if he wants something to do with his child, even later on in life , he still has rights. And if you want child support, yes then put him on the birth certificate. But he will have to cone in to sign it. And if he doesn’t, court still will do a DNA to prove he is the father & make him pay support. But you can give the baby your last name
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Definitely not!!!
I had this issue and my midwife said no no no don’t do it!
They have control over everything he can stop you leaving the country, he can stop you sending them to a specific school etc
Don’t do it if they are not in their life! X
Also the father has to be present to be put on it anyway x
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Responsibility people you play you pay he has the rights. Either way.