Should I tell my childs father when I give birth?

He don’t need to be on the birth certificate to get child support. If he denies it’s his the child support can do DNA

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I would not. And I would call cps on him for his other kid…

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No I wouldn’t tell him anything

Do not tell him.Tell your sister and her boyfriend what a wacky job this guy is.And for them not to try to set him up with anyone else.And her boyfriend might want to find a new best friend.

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I would run, run fast and far

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I’d tell him after some time has passed. But still make it that legally he can’t ever take the baby from you. I’d file for sole custody after the baby is born

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A Nigerian prince​:stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes::stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: not only did you get scammed over the phone, but in real life. This is hilarious :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes::stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes::stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
Here’s a tidbit…. Next time you meet someone take it slow, don’t fall in love in 5 minutes bc you may get a lap full of scam again. Btw how does 1 fall in love in 5 mins? :woman_facepalming:

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Personally, I would say I got the abortion and post pics with a “new guy” then block him on EVERYTHING and move girl!! Just saying you need to get the flock outta there.

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I wouldn’t tell him and I’d move. Save yourself while you can. Dude’s like that go crazy when they knock somebody up.

No definitely don’t tell him

No I wouldn’t tell him! I’d be running and fast

If you aren’t putting him on the birth certificate why would you tell him ? It’s kinda all or nothing make your choice

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I think you already know the answer to your own question.

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I would not say a word.
Live your life and forget him.

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You should’ve done that background check before you pulled your pants down for him. There was multiple red flags and you collected them as you passed them.

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Move away. When you have the baby. Send him a picture and tell him, see what you are missing. Karma for all your lies

Do women not use birth control anymore…

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Don’t ever tell him anything about your baby. And you don’t ever see this pig

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Even if you don’t put him on the birth certificate… If he finds out, he can take you to court for a paternity test & visitation.

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All those red flags and you still slept with him?? I feel like we’re being trolled. This can’t be real.

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I would not say nothing at all. And do not put him on birth certificate. Raise your baby.

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Agree with everyone here. But the bit about aspergers is probably true. People with aspergers often clam up around others, but speak freely with immediate family members.

Run! And disappear. Baby doesn’t have to have his name. You DO NOT have to have him sign birth certificate (it does make it harder on him to state claim on your kid. You don’t need the pain & misery. Being a single mom is rough but at least you’re live and not a slave. Royalty? Yeah prince of garbage. Lies break a foundation. You’re strong enough. Get away from him. (I gave my kids my last name. They’re 13 & 22.)

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Girl pack your stuff and move to another town. Don’t tell him because he will find out your address unless you get a PO box as well because it’s public record if it’s a po box then thats it.

Do not tell him
And if your afraid this baby will have the same traits of his which unfortunately in this situation it’s not good. You’ve contemplated abortion, there is always adoption. Im juat saying you made choices and now that things are much clearer now you still have other options.
I know of several folks who have been adopted or have adopted.I have an adopted son from Guatemala. This is a sitaution that you need to consider the other members of your family as well.

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I found some things out about my youngest sperm donor just before finding out I was pregnant with her. She just turned 6 this month and he knows nothing about her or that she exists. I put all my social media on lock down and everything so there is no way he can ever come across my stuff and see her. You do what you feel in your gut is the best for that baby, that’s truly all that matters in the end.

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Tell him you got an abortion and don’t say anything else, only problem is you need to swear his friend to secrecy

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Definitely don’t tell him go far away from him and make sure you don’t put his name or last name for anything

Wow smfh the nope don’t tell him mentality
Is awful and could mess with the child one day. My mom did that crap and I honestly hold that grudge. There is supervised visits he can be reliable paying for, if he ends up choosing to not be there then so be it but don’t be the one to keep the child away. It’s wrong.

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I would not tell him at all and just block him so he can’t message you on any Plat form

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I would say don’t include him at all. The only thing I was wondering is if someone in your social circle would alert him that you had a baby

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If you’re an attorney, you’d know half the stuff you’ve said doesn’t make sense.

He only needs to apply in court for a paternity test. If he’s the father, he can win 50/50… worse people out there have 50/50.
You should know that.

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Don’t tell him sounds, like trouble already

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And while you are at it maybe report him for the child he already has.

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Tell him you had an abortion and run!

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Just because you don’t tell him doesn’t mean he won’t find out or eventually have legal rights. A birth certificate can be changed with a court order. If he finds out you had the baby, all he has to do is take a paternity test.

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I most definitely wouldn’t. You’ve already said your goodbyes. Leave the situation where it’s at. It’s done. On a positive note, congrats on your new baby. Enjoy it without all the extra stress. :heart:

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Please have an abortion and save this world from his crazy genes

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…why are you still even speaking to him? Get the abortion, or don’t get the abortion but for the sake of yourself and your children, cut this man out of your life. Women get killed by unhinged exs every single day. I would get a restraining order and never speak to this man again.

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you already have your answer. if you’re saying you’re not going to put him on the birth certificate, then why even tell him? If you’re cutting him out to protect your child then you have to make a definitive decision on this. you can’t have it both ways. Don’t expect child support if he’s not on the birth certificate. have your baby and forget he’s alive and walk right past him on the street but there’s no reason you should be in the same vicinity as him. A conscience effort need to be made to avoid him and keep your family in the loop enough so that they know not to share information considering he’s the boyfriends best friend.

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Wait until the baby is born. Don’t put anyone on the birth certificate. Then file to establish paternity and for full custody. That way it will add him to the birth certificate but you’ll have already petitioned for custody. In your petition you can easily attach the texts that he demanded you get an abortion.

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Run, hide, get away and keep that baby SAFE

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Say nothing steer clear and get some help for that poor kid of his!!

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I wouldn’t say shit. Avoid him like the plague.

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No. say nothing if you want to live in peace.

Don’t tell him anything,no pics,NOTHING!

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First do. It tell him anything second do not put him on the birth certificate after six months of baby birth file for abandonment :ok_hand:t2::warning: make sure to just post an add in paper for like what a month or something ask attorney state time line for process of service you have to put his full name place of court name time and date and what the court date is for run add for said amount of time and bam file for full custody once that’s fine you can request child support for child support do this in this exact order but the only way it will work is if he has no contact with baby for six month or you do not tell him about baby guy is obviously very unstable this will be the only sure way to protect you and baby and then if he does find out ect you already have full custody and it’s up to your discretion if he can or can but be with baby see baby ect this will be a life long court battle I promise you do not tell him about baby :ok_hand:t2::clap:t2: protection this child is your first and most important job if you are keeping the baby :warning: good luck simple process just takes a little time change your phone number !! Second do not respond to any calls text ect record all contact he send for back up but do not not talk to him at all until full custody is in place

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First off I would contact child protective services and have his son taken care of and after that he would never hear from me. But please help the little boy. He doesn’t deserve that kind of life.

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No you already know he is abusive. Don’t put your child through that or put it up for adoption.

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I wouldn’t tell him anything. I would stay away from him and avoid all contact. He could be a danger to you and your children

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Get an abortion, or get a lawyer. Because unless you can prove the things you’ve listed and show he’s a danger, a simple paternity test will give him rights

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Get his son help n keep it to yourself but be prepared to go to court one day your friends bf gonna tell him

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I wouldn’t say a word. Girl, you’ve got this! I had a whoops baby 12 years after my older children and man, I cannot imagine life without him! It will all work out the way it is supposed to!

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I think the only thing you have to tell him is HE’S NOT IN HIS OWN COUNTRY !!! Royalty my ass :rofl:

Run and Don’t tell him and don’t put him on the Birth certificate

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Honey you should’ve checked the background before you laid down. Unless you’re ready to be a single parent. You also need to reschedule that appointment and go get back on the table because this is about to be your child not his but yours. He’s made it perfectly clear he isn’t where he needs to be mentally nor financially. To help provide for another child. Whenever you’re done and whatever you decide please go get some counseling or a mentor. That can help you make better decisions when picking someone to invest your time, mind, body and soul in.

Domestic violence and child endangerment? NOPE.
––Definitely do not put him on the birth certificate, or give him any more info.
––Block him from contacting you.
––If you use Medicaid for health insurance, or other assistance, the court might eventually want to establish paternity, but claim you do not know who the father is (one night stand––no idea where he is––no full name). He will otherwise have to fight to establish paternity, and by the sound of it, he has zero means to do so.
––Keep all the threatening texts, voicemails, correspondence. Might be useful for a PPO.
––Keep yourself and children safe. :blue_heart:

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If it were me in that situation he’d never know I had that baby F$&k that! But I’d absolutely not want him on the birth certificate and I wouldn’t want my child to be around him if you told him he could fight for Paternity test and possibly gain some rights… definitely not full custody but could still get rights he seems very toxic in many ways and that’s not safe for you or your child

What’s wrong with your sister?

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Pray. Stop posting your entire life on fakebook. Get straight with the Heavenly Father God and He will supply your need. Yes. Tell this man his child has arrived. Do not give the child on his last name. Give both last names. This way when the child is older he or she can decide if they want to drop a name or keep both. Tell him and take him for child support.
Other than that move away from him and get help from family or friends. Abortion will not only tear the baby apart but tear you apart inside. Let the mockers mock but I tell you this… God will supply you with help… All you have to do is Ask Him and Believe. No one on the planet loves you with Unconditional Love like the Heavenly Father.

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I wouldnt tell him. But that’s me. I wouldnt want that drama

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No. And stay away from him.

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All those red flags, and you still slept with him. 🤦

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Do. Not. Tell. Him. I can’t stress this enough.

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I would say nothing and live a happy life with my child. Hes toxic.

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Nope,do not tell him anything,do not send photos,cut off all contact,if he is the way you say,then your baby is better off not knowing him at all and I feel awful for his other child

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Enjoy your baby, it’s truly a blessing & f’n run :running_woman: plenty of successful single mothers out here!!

I would not tell him. I’d let the hospital know when it comes time your situation so if anyone calls they can say you aren’t there to protect yall.

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Don’t tell him and move to a new location.

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His friend will surely tell him.

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Best thing you can do is stay far away from him

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Your sister foul for that one… and her bf too. Next time do a background check beforehand…

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Don’t involve him in any way. Move on with your life but cover yourself and your children legally. I would report the abuse of his son but do so thru your attorney

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Nope. Leave it where you left off. Follow your lawyers advice and move on. Congrats on your baby I’m sure you will do great without him!

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My sister in law did this she found out she was 11 weeks pregnant by her abusive ex she told him she aborted he found out thru social media when my niece was 3 months and pressed the issue of being in her life and it has been platonic but his mom and him provide OVER THE TOP & get her for several weeks at a time just not him alone he’s an amazing dad (obv diff that your situation) but I wouldn’t post the baby on any social media or anything related to having the child …

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Just forget him and move on, I wouldn’t even want or to see him. You and your baby are better off. Who knows what he’s capable of. He obviously probably beat up his ex, why else would she leave? She left her child with him so she doesn’t have to deal with him. I would get an restraining order on him. Maybe move and change your numbers too!

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Get a restraining order & make it very clear to mutuals that he is NOT to be told anything unless it’s by you.
Don’t list him on anything, anywhere, at anytime. Ever.
If he wants to see his child, ensure he gets a paternity test & based on what you’ve found, it’s supervised.
Good luck momma. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Why would you if you don’t want it for you all now? What you want to chance it later? All the red flags and actual proof and yet you question facts? For someone who should know better, you don’t seem to know better. Honestly, you may want to reconsider the clinic. If he even gets a hint and asks for paternity you’ll be in a situation then. Also, have you given thought to this child having the same issues as his father? A lot of mental illnesses etc. are genetic as well.

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Wait… you’re not even 11 weeks and feel “flutters”? Your baby isn’t even 2 inches yet lol that’s gas. Either way tho, don’t tell him anything, I’d call CPS and get his son out of that house ASAP. Block that man too.

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I say no don’t tell him and move.

Girl - I’m so sorry!

After what all he’s threatened u with . I wouldn’t be afraid what he will do after having baby

All he has to do is petition the court for a DNA test.

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I wouldn’t tell him anything. If he somehow finds out you’re keeping the baby, I would lie and say it’s not his, and it’s a total separate pregnancy.

All of you saying don’t tell him that’s horrible . What happens when child grows up a and wants to know who his dad is , what if one day the dad finds out and he will that isn’t fair to the dad or child . Maybe u shouldn’t have slept with him . Also he could go to court and request a DNA test and him not being on birth certificate wouldn’t even matter

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Listen to you lawyer. Don’t put him on the birth certificate and never talk to him again. I would even consider moving and changing my number. Run, girl, run.

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no he is unstable RUN protect you child id let him think you went ahead with the abortion and if he finds out you had a child id let him think it was someone elses,

Nope don’t say anything.

Definitely do not have anything else do call him do not him anything you and your baby deserve a happy life …good luck praying for you and your unborn baby

Your lawyer is right imo. Dont put his name on the birth certificate and dont tell him when your child is born. Cut all ties. Change the locks . Call security if he turns up at your place of work. Call the police if he turns up at your home.
Warn the schools etc your other children attend that hes not allowed contact of any kind with them.
Its easy to be taken in by these compulsive liars and hard to get rid of them till they take up with some other poor soul

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And this is why you run background checks before you lay down with someone… Unfortunately, it’s his child. He has rights… You don’t have to tell him anything, but your sisters man will…

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Don’t tell him ! Your life would be misery! XO

Absolutely not! U can do it on ur own and I think ur child wld be worse off if he knew about u having the baby. Just move on and be happy!

No. I wouldn’t tell him anything. Have your lawyer request a restraining order incase he sees your belly or someone tells him. That way you’re protected. I would just let him go on thinking you and him parted ways and the procedure happened…
Best of luck !

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Absolutely not! Also as a mental health counselor, I believe if you’ve witnessed neglect,abuse or suspected abuse/ neglect, then you are a mandatory reporter for such! Good luck.

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I vote with those who say do not put him on the birth certificate. Do not tell him when your child is born. Do not send him photos of your child.

I also vote with the folks who ask you to do something for the autistic little boy who has no stable parent. He needs help to ensure he can function in the world.

Lastly, since you are in the mental health field, you might want to start refreshing your training regarding autistic children. Your baby may be in the spectrum so more than anything else, you may want to plan ahead for those times when you will need breaks, for those times when your child may need modified enrichment and for those times when outside therapy including a pet might benefit your baby and child as he or she grows up.

It isn’t easy being a single parent. It will be a nightmare if you allow the father into your life and your child’s life. Please don’t take the path of hard knocks. Listen to your gut. Don’t put your child through that.

I wish you a long and happy life with your child. I wish you all the best in your future endeavours.

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Nope, he thinks you had an abortion so leave it at that! he sounds super dangerous 

nope do not tell him nothing ,if you can support your child then do not put his name on the birth certificate ever. never tell him nothing ,if he bothers you get a restraining order against him fast.

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People need to stop having sex with people before they know them. It’s literally our responsibility.

typically I don’t read long posts :joy:
but… you caught my attention.

DO NOT PUT HIM ON THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE PERIOD!
And… don’t even tell him about your baby. :grimacing:

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Tell him you got the abortion move and never talk to him again. He said he doesn’t want the baby and honestly it might be best for that baby to not be subjected to that type of person.

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