My sisters husband confided in me and my husband how much he does not want kids. He married my sister and fills her head up with the idea that he wants kids but he truly doesn’t since she has already has an 11 year old. Should I tell her or continue minding my business…?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I tell my sister what her husband said? - Mamas Uncut
He’s a piece of crap
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I mean I would, I would also want my sister to tell me too
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She’ll figure it out.
His choice, not everyone wants kids, it doesn’t make them bad, kids cost a fortune theses days
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Tell him he needs to be honest with her, or you will, but give him that chance. They both deserve to be happy and it shouldn’t be under false pretenses.
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Tell her… or you are no better than him. Kids are a pretty huge deal. And if he manages to put her off until it " too late" …she will have wasted a lot of years…which could have been avoided if her sister would have been honest and loyal…or are you just going to sit back and watch him destroy her dreams?
Keep your nose out of it IMO
i would tell her. i wouldn’t want my sister to be with a man who tells her he wants kids when he doesn’t. she deserves to be with someone who wants the same. she’s your sister, you want her to be happy, you don’t want her to be lied to or led on… tell her… or as said above, tell him he needs to be honest with her and tell her, give him the choice. if he doesn’t, then you tell her. she deserves to know that she’s wasting her time.
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Yes definitely tell her!
Tell her. If he was willing to lie about this to get her to marry him, what else has he lied about?
The fact that he told you that he wants it to be told to her since he can’t tell it to him
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I would tell him to be honest with her or you will🙄
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It’s not your place to say anything…That’s something he needs to discuss with her… You should suggest to him that he should tell her how he feels instead of telling you… Personally, I think it’s best she doesn’t hear it from you… That’s between them!
Yep I would tell her because why is he having a marital conversation with you, her family. He should be having this conversation with her. If he’s lying about that what else is he lying about. Tell her now so she doesn’t waste any time. If she does want more kids and it’s important to her this is critical information.
Tell him to tell her.
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Not your place to say anything
Mind your own business.
That’s your sister. You owe her your loyalty, not her husband. I would immediately tell my sister.
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He told you directly, and that’s your sister. I would tell her.
I always mind my business when it comes to other people and their relationships.
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Tell him to tell her or you will. I personally feel he needs to man up and tell her but if he doesn’t I’d do it because that’s something she needs to know.
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Stay in your lane…that is their business
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Keep it to urself. He told you in hopes of you telling so he wouldn’t have to. Make him tell her. Don’t be the messenger!!
Your sister should know. You neeed to tell her!
That’s your sister yes you should tell her!
I’d choose loyalty to my sister at the end of the day. Especially when it’s something that is disrespectful to her which is him lying to her and leading her on all because she already has a kid (which is dumb because hes known all along yet still married her). Yes he confided in you and your husband but still… does it sit right with you ? Clearly not. Would you want your sister to be honest with you if roles were reversed ? Atleast that’s what I think.
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Tell your sister that is where loyalty falls shouldn’t even be a question to tell her
You didn’t hear anything.
That’s between them, and her husband is an ass for trying to bring you in to it. He wanted you to do his dirty work. Don’t you dare do it.
Tell your sis her bloke is confiding with you guys about personal stuff
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I always mind my own business, also, but this is your sister! Tell her!
Keep your sister,keep mouth shut
Nah, she’ll shoot the messenger and it’ll be you thats the bad guy.
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So my brother and I are close, especially after our mom passed. If he had a wife who straight up told me and my husband in confidence that she never wanted to have kids and was just placating my brother with lies about how she wanted to have kids with him I have my brother on speed dial and I wouldn’t have even hesitated to call him right then and there and have his wife tell him what she just told me. There’s no way in hell I’d allow someone to lie to my sibling like that and bring their hopes up of one day starting a family when the reality is they’d be wasting their time with all those hopes and dreams.
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I was with my first long relationship from the time I was 15 years old until I was 21. Yes I was young but I always new I wanted a family and I wanted it with him. He played , he finally got the nerve to tell me that he didn’t want kids and he never wanted to be married. But my heart was broke and shattered. But never the less a year later I found a man who wanted kids and we have two beautiful daughters who are 12 and 15. 4 years later he sent me a message saying how sorry he was and that he finally had to let me go because he couldn’t give me what I wanted. If this was me and my sister’s husband told me this there would be no question at me telling. I knew the heart act thinking we would have kids and he lead me on about for two years and then finally got the courage to tell me. Lucky I was young so my hopes were still there. But she don’t deserve not have anymore Kids if that is what she wants. I could never lead someone on who wanted something like that. I hope he man’s up and tells her.
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It must not be too big of a deal to her if she hasn’t had another child in 11 years.
I would tell my sister 
If u want to tell her you better have proof of what he said thru either text message or recording. If you don’t she’ll confront him and he’ll deny it and she’ll be mad at you. Pick your battles with this one
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He’s the dummy who confided in his wife’s sister. He’s straight up lying to her. I would tell her. You did mind your own business and he put you in their business.
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Sounds like a trap. I would mind my business about this one.
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Should asked him why he’s talking about having kids then that’s something to discuss when they first started talking relationship wise
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I would probably tell her, but in a way that pushes them to communicate about it. Maybe say it came up in convo and he gave you the impression that he didn’t want kids after all. Tell her that she should revisit the subject with him and make sure they’re on the same page. He can’t avoid it forever, she will eventually look to start trying and if he’s secretly preventing it it’ll come to light at some point.
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He doesn’t have the balls to tell her. He told you knowing very well you will tell her. You being used
Yup tell him, he told you for a reason!!! He might be trying to bounce
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Tell her. Safe for years of being with this piece of trash
Your sister has a right to know especially if she wants more kids and he’s lying to her.
My sister comes first.
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If it was me I would!
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He can’t tell her, so he told you in hopes that you’d tell her. That’s conversation he needs to have with his wife though, not you.
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I told my sister something her husband said and she went off on me about staying out of her marriage. It’s something I would want to know and I would be mad to find out my sister knew and didn’t tell me. But it messed up our relationship for a long time. Now we have an unspoken agreement not to say anything to each other when it comes to relationships. She wants to be blindsided or ignorant then that is what she wants. So just be prepared for your sister to get mad at you, but do what feels right. Either way you’re kind of screwed.
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He should immediately
Mind your business. Not your marriage.
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I would, if my sister’s had hopes but he clearly has no intentions or interest. Don’t let your sister waste her time
He better tell her himself . Also explain why he would say he wants kids when he clearly doesn’t .
Casually bring it up in convo with both of them “I thought ‘Jim’ here wasn’t the type to really want kids” etc.
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Mind your business!!!
Stay out of it, you will end up with both of them mad with you.
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Why did he tell you and not her? What a passive aggressive move. He obviously wants you to tell her. But it is his place.
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Tell her in front of him. Maybe say “Jim I was surprised to hear that you don’t want children” Then let them do the talking.
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I will tell her no sense in wasting her time and energy on somebody who doesn’t want kids if she wants kids
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He brought you two into it, so feel free to give your input. Just my opinion. If I feel my sibling is in a detrimental or wasteful relationship (ie, she wants kids and he knows this, lies to her and feels otherwise) then of course I’m going to let my sibling know what I think. It doesn’t mean I’m going to force my beliefs or opinions onto them, but I’d let this information be known so that she has the chance to make an actual, educated decision on the stance of her relationship. Imagine letting her live for several more years hoping that she will one day have more children, never knowing that her significant other has opposing desires, you being in the know and never telling her. If I were in her position, I would want to know now, not down the line when it’s too late to do anything about it.
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Keep your nose at home
Mind your own business
I know of a situation where the girl lied and told her husband that she couldn’t have children. He always wanted kids, and it was no secret. He’d often talk about adoption, but she’d brush it off. He finally got to the point where he wanted to start the process. When he approached her about it, she finally admitted to lying about not being able to have kids and told him she just doesn’t want any. They got divorced, he remarried and is now a very involved and devoted father. If he’s lying to her than she needs to know. I’d tell him that if he doesn’t come clean about it, than you’ll tell her. Why should she be with someone who doesn’t want the same things as her? It’s not fair to anyone involved.
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I 100% would tell her as it also affects your niece/nephew
Minding your own business doesn’t really apply when you’ve been brought into it by the husband
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Naw that’s family ! I wouldn’t even question holding that too myself . Why put your sister through years of time possibly wasted rather then being 100 & getting the hard part over with now
To all the people saying mind your business…he made it your business by telling you. Tell him to tell her or you will.
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